How do I become a more Loving person?

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dizzy_dave

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How do I become a more loving person when most of my life I have been selfish and unloving, sometimes when I try to be loving or nice I feel fake. So how do I change myself after so many bad years of being unloving?
 
Pray, pray and pray some more. It’s very hard to be nasty when you are saying a silent prayer.

Ask the Holy Spirit to come into every conversation, especially when it could be a upsetting conversation. It takes some practice to remember to call on the Holy Spirit, but He is a Wonderful Helper!!!

I try to remember to ask the Holy Spirit to fill my heart with His Love and Peace and to touch everyone I come in contact with, especially before I step a foot into my work place!
 
Pray and act.

Pray often (more than daily) to love more each and every day, to love purer more and more like God’s love for each of us.

Add acts of kindness to what you do everyday. Be gentle (this links to a meditation on gentleness.)

See everyone as Jesus and treat them with the respect that you would expect. Try to love each person you encounter and try to be a vessel of God’s love for them.
 
I’d look for examples in the Scripture. Take Zachaeus - he was a tax collector and not a very loving person. He met Jesus and decided to pay back (and more) all he had taken.

Find ways to show love to someone and, when you do, say “Lord God, I feel like a hypocrit, but I know that this act will show love. Pour your love out on me and the others that I love.”

Meditate on God’s love for you and how little you deserve it. Thank him for his love, and ask that He help you to feel the same love for others.

What a wonderful question! It shows that God is working in your heart just that you think about it and want to practice love.

RubyWannabe
 
The Act of Charity:

O my God, I love you above all things with my whole heart and soul because you are all good and worthy of all my love.
I love my neighbor as myself for the love of you.
I forgive all who have injured me and ask pardon of all whom I have injured. Amen

Litany of Humility:

ewtn.com/Devotionals/prayers/humility.htm

Mathew 25:40
I say to you, as long as you did it to one of these my least brethren, you did it to me.

So as you go through the day, when someone upsets you, when you see some ‘lesser’, when you start feeling selfish, say these prayers, look at the person, and think “There is Jesus”.
 
True love is more than emotion, it’s an act of the will.

When you do something for the sole reason that it pleases God, then you have demonstrated love. When you don’t do something because doing so will displease God, then you have demonstrated love.

Remember, love can be independent of emotion.
 
“The Hidden Power of Kindness” by a priest called
Fr. Lovasik.

My head was spinning at the number of kind suggestions offered,
but the moral of the story was: think kind thoughts about people.
 
Pray for God to come into your heart. You cannot be loving if God is not inside your heart.

You have to empty yourself and fill up on God.

I will pray for God to be with you in everything you do.😉

Blessings
 
The Gospel of John is very good to read and reflect on in matters pertaining to love. It’s almost as good as spending time with our Lord in Adoration. Go and sit or kneel before Him. Allow Him to speak to our heart. Read John in Christ’s presence. It will have a profound effect on you.

Christ’s peace.
 
pray for the people who most need daily demonstrations of your love, and consciously do loving actions for them and allow only loving (or neutral) speech to leave your mouth. Look for something positive to say when a negative remark comes to mind. Look actively for loving actions you can do. these are tiny things, like picking up dirty socks, unloading the dishwasher, done silently, without fanfare, without grumbling, and without being asked.
 
dizzy_dave, read and carefully meditate on each word in Romans 12:1-2. Perhaps memorize that scripture.

Romans 12:1-2 (NAB) I urge you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God, your spiritual worship. Do not conform yourselves to this age but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and pleasing and perfect.

"When you know better, you do better." - Maya Angelo
To go along with knowing better, read 1 Corinthians Chapter 13 over and over. Perhaps read it every other day for a few months.
Psalm 119:11 (KJV) Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.

Years ago when I was in college, I had a “born again” experience (or so I thought). And somebody I knew was working on Bible memorization. So one summer I thought I’ll start working on memorizing some psalms and the whole epistle of James. I had it all figured out that I might memorize James by working on a bit each day. Well, I only got so far as memorizing the first four psalms and perhaps almost all of James chapter 1. I know it was helpful to me, although I don’t know if it made me a more loving person.

Pray the Rosary. Since I started thinking more Catholic only four years ago, this has been a very big thing for me. The Holy Rosary includes the Our Father and the Hail Mary. Both of these prayers (if you really dwell on them and meditate on them) should change your attitude (over time) and I do think they will make you a more loving and kind person. How can you pray “Hail Mary full of grace…” and then not be bothered when you do not have grace towards others. We are to imitate Mary – who lives perfectly.

St. Peter Damien “[The apostle] John loved her [Mary, the mother of Jesus] like his own mother and was loved by her as her own son.”

Mary loves you as her own son Jesus. So do your part and love Mary. The more you love Mary, the more you will want to imitate Mary.

Pray the Prayer of St. Francis. Maybe memorize it too.
“Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
…”

dizzy_dave – pray for me too. Over the last few years that I’ve participated in these forums, I have been blessed to respond to questions that you ask. When that happens, it generally is the case that you have asked a question that I needed to know the answer to. Because I have the same need. I also have the same desire – to become more willing to be truly loving. And to be less selfish and seeking my own needs.

jmm08
 
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