How do I get higher self-esteem without committing the sin of pride?

[losh14]

Ok, see that’s the thing Rebecca, I don’t really know how to love myself in the way that God knows me. How do I do that?

With a self-emptying, self-giving love.
onlinehomilies.com/groups/washucsc/5
Check the 4/27/2008 11 am homily

There’s a major difference between pride and hubris. Hubris says “I did this on my own” and leads to self-centeredness. Pride says “I did this because of He who empowers me” and leads to thankfulness. Hubris drives you to serve your own ends. A non-sinful pride drives you to share what you have with others, to serve the Lord by serving others. If you really begin with a thankful heart, it’s hard to experience pride that becomes excessive.

 

[brigid12]

Ah ok. I always try to give God the credit for anything good that I do. Sometimes I fail in that task but I do try.

Also, I go to confession whenever I feel I need to as well (which can be quite often for me considering that I am scrupulous).

Holly,

First off, what you feel is a true suffering :hug1: that you can offer up to Him all the time and know that it is bringing you closer to Him (at this time, until you have a chance to benefit from His help - if you don’t, you are in essence, rejecting Him:blush.

Secondly, I really think that the difference between self-pride and Godly-esteem is Trust in Him (maybe saying the Divine Mercy chaplet daily would be helpful to you and/or the Rosary - if you feel closer to Our Lady - both help with dopamine/serotonin, too). I have pondered and pondered over this, due to my own chronic depression problems and I think that once we can learn total trust in Him it would lead us to be as brave (minus depression and panic-attacks/anxiety) as St. Teresa of Avila. In fact, other than praying for intercession to St. Dymphna, I would think that St. Teresa would be a courageous (for the Lord) saint to get help from.

Thirdly, on EWTN recently Fr. Groeschel (a very orthodox, friar who is also a psychologist) was asked what to do in the case of severe depression. He said, unequivically that our duty in stewardship (of our bodies) was to see a psychiatrist (not just a regular Dr.) who also had additional training/certification in psychopharmacology. He was adamant about that! This was on a program dedicated to the spiritual journey.

I know from my own experience that when one is severely depressed, the motivation to do what you know/think you need to do is really hard to come by. You need that boost neuro-chemically in order to Trust in Him and do the other things to follow Him more closely - to be His Hands and Feet in the world. He has provided for you so take advantage of that. If the doctor you’re seeing isn’t a psychiatrist with additional psychopharmacologic training/certification than you can ask his office/message to him for a recommendation to one. You can also just use “Google” to find such a person - then just call them for an appt.

Just my :twocents:

 

[Holly3278]

Christ commanded us to love our neighbors as our selves.

That means we ARE to love our selves.

This love–self-esteem–should be rooted in the facts that God made us to love and intends us for great joy that no one can take from us.

Ah ok. That makes sense. Thank you.

My dear friend Holly

The great commandments are to love God with your whole heart…and love your neighbour as yourself. This love we should have for ourselves is the greatest possible love we can have. If God loves us should we not love ourselves. God is insanely in love with us. God is love and can only love us. All he wants to do is love us. Holly, when you have poor health it’s very natural for us to become a little self centred. It’s natural and we all do it. Me too. The answer is to focus on others and try to help other people and it’s good to try to do more things for God and please God and forget yourself and just love God. When we do this we forget all our own problems and get relief from our trials. If God has given you a big cross it’s because he loves you more than others. It’s not forever though. I am still praying for you too.

God bless you

Hmmm, this makes sense as well. Thanks!

With a self-emptying, self-giving love.
onlinehomilies.com/groups/washucsc/5
Check the 4/27/2008 11 am homily

There’s a major difference between pride and hubris. Hubris says “I did this on my own” and leads to self-centeredness. Pride says “I did this because of He who empowers me” and leads to thankfulness. Hubris drives you to serve your own ends. A non-sinful pride drives you to share what you have with others, to serve the Lord by serving others. If you really begin with a thankful heart, it’s hard to experience pride that becomes excessive.

Ok, I see. I am not entirely sure what hubris is as I have not heard the term very often but I think I understand what you are saying. Thanks!

 

[Robert_Sock]

Hi everyone. How do I get higher self-esteem without committing the sin of pride? I know that I have a serious self-esteem issue but I may also have a pride issue at time. My best friend tells me that when the Bible mentions pride, it just means not being egotistical. Is this true? Can I actually be proud of myself without committing the sin of pride?

Why seek self-esteem when you can have high esteem? Think about it for a moment, self-esteem is selfish. High esteem towards one another, on the other hand, is LOVE! Why not seek a high esteem towards Christ and life itself and forgo the self. Just my humble opinion, but why not crush the self, which I believe is a tool of Satan.

 

[Holly3278]

Holly,

First off, what you feel is a true suffering :hug1: that you can offer up to Him all the time and know that it is bringing you closer to Him (at this time, until you have a chance to benefit from His help - if you don’t, you are in essence, rejecting Him:blush.

Secondly, I really think that the difference between self-pride and Godly-esteem is Trust in Him (maybe saying the Divine Mercy chaplet daily would be helpful to you and/or the Rosary - if you feel closer to Our Lady - both help with dopamine/serotonin, too). I have pondered and pondered over this, due to my own chronic depression problems and I think that once we can learn total trust in Him it would lead us to be as brave (minus depression and panic-attacks/anxiety) as St. Teresa of Avila. In fact, other than praying for intercession to St. Dymphna, I would think that St. Teresa would be a courageous (for the Lord) saint to get help from.

Thirdly, on EWTN recently Fr. Groeschel (a very orthodox, friar who is also a psychologist) was asked what to do in the case of severe depression. He said, unequivically that our duty in stewardship (of our bodies) was to see a psychiatrist (not just a regular Dr.) who also had additional training/certification in psychopharmacology. He was adamant about that! This was on a program dedicated to the spiritual journey.

I know from my own experience that when one is severely depressed, the motivation to do what you know/think you need to do is really hard to come by. You need that boost neuro-chemically in order to Trust in Him and do the other things to follow Him more closely - to be His Hands and Feet in the world. He has provided for you so take advantage of that. If the doctor you’re seeing isn’t a psychiatrist with additional psychopharmacologic training/certification than you can ask his office/message to him for a recommendation to one. You can also just use “Google” to find such a person - then just call them for an appt.

Just my :twocents:

Ah ok. That makes a lot of sense. I’ve been thinking about getting a 2nd opinion on my mental disorders and medication but I don’t know if my Medicaid allows for that. I am already seeing a psychiatrist. I don’t know if he specializes in psychopharmacology or not but I know that he does prescribe me medication. I have also considered electroshock therapy.

 

[John_Russell_Jr]

Ah ok. That makes sense. Thank you.

Hmmm, this makes sense as well. Thanks!

Ok, I see. I am not entirely sure what hubris is as I have not heard the term very often but I think I understand what you are saying. Thanks!

Happy feast day too dear Holly
I’m off to mass now. This ones for you. I hope it helps.

God bless you:thumbsup:

 

[brigid12]

Ah ok. That makes a lot of sense. I’ve been thinking about getting a 2nd opinion on my mental disorders and medication but I don’t know if my Medicaid allows for that. I am already seeing a psychiatrist. I don’t know if he specializes in psychopharmacology or not but I know that he does prescribe me medication. I have also considered electroshock therapy.

I’m glad you’re seeing a psychiatrist to get help. I know I always feel strongest and calmest after receiving the Eucharist and after Adoration. I also have a Holy Card with the Divine Mercy image on it - to remind me to Trust Him (boy, that’s hard for me !). My guess (and it’s just that) are that the Divine Mercy chaplet would be good for your scrupulosity, too - as will be the medication.

Do remember, we here at CAF sure care about you!

 

[Holly3278]

Happy feast day too dear Holly
I’m off to mass now. This ones for you. I hope it helps.

God bless you:thumbsup:

Today is a feast day? I totally was not aware of that. See, I can’t attend Mass on a daily basis because I live in a town that does not have daily Mass and the nearest town from here that does have a daily Mass is a 25 minute drive away. I simply can’t afford the gas for such a trip.

I’m glad you’re seeing a psychiatrist to get help. I know I always feel strongest and calmest after receiving the Eucharist and after Adoration. I also have a Holy Card with the Divine Mercy image on it - to remind me to Trust Him (boy, that’s hard for me !). My guess (and it’s just that) are that the Divine Mercy chaplet would be good for your scrupulosity, too - as will be the medication.

Do remember, we here at CAF sure care about you!

I also always feel strongest and calmest after receiving the Eucharist and after Adoration. Also, I really like the Divine Mercy Chaplet.

 

[PhilotheaZ]

Today is a feast day? I totally was not aware of that. See, I can’t attend Mass on a daily basis because I live in a town that does not have daily Mass and the nearest town from here that does have a daily Mass is a 25 minute drive away. I simply can’t afford the gas for such a trip.

It is in Australia, where it is already March 25 — the Solemnity of the Assumption, one of my favorite feasts! Tomorrow for us Americans.

So to all of you for whom it is still yesterday(??), happy feast day tomorrow!

 

[LilyM]

It is indeed the Feast of the Annunciation (not the Assumption - that ain’t until August) here in Oz. If I make a bit of an effort I can get to evening Mass.

Holly, I think we all need to get some God-esteem, which is different from self-esteem. We need to remember, fragile and weak as we may be, we are nonetheless made in His image, that He loves each of us so much that He sent Jesus to make redemption possible for each of us, and that He wants all good things for us - even more than we want them for ourselves.

And that each of us, like St Paul, ‘can do all things in Christ who strengthens (us)’. That’s a good mantra that I use sometimes when the thoughts come - ‘you can’t do xyz, you’re gonna fail, you’re no good’.

Mary, for example, had no problems predicting that all generations would call her blessed, but she did not do so because of her own merits, great as they were. Rather her confidence and joy was in God - ‘the Almighty works marvels for me’.

 

[PhilotheaZ]

It is indeed the Feast of the Annunciation (not the Assumption - that ain’t until August) here in Oz.

Oops! Bad slip of the fingers on the keyboard.

 

[Holly3278]

It is indeed the Feast of the Annunciation (not the Assumption - that ain’t until August) here in Oz. If I make a bit of an effort I can get to evening Mass.

Holly, I think we all need to get some God-esteem, which is different from self-esteem. We need to remember, fragile and weak as we may be, we are nonetheless made in His image, that He loves each of us so much that He sent Jesus to make redemption possible for each of us, and that He wants all good things for us - even more than we want them for ourselves.

And that each of us, like St Paul, ‘can do all things in Christ who strengthens (us)’. That’s a good mantra that I use sometimes when the thoughts come - ‘you can’t do xyz, you’re gonna fail, you’re no good’.

Mary, for example, had no problems predicting that all generations would call her blessed, but she did not do so because of her own merits, great as they were. Rather her confidence and joy was in God - ‘the Almighty works marvels for me’.

Ah ok! Well that makes sense. So what you are saying is that I should feel like I can do anything with the help of Jesus Christ and always give Him the credit? (Just asking to make sure I got it right.)

 

[Dandelion_Wine]

JPUSC:

Building healthy self-esteem

counselling.qut.edu.au/se…elf_esteem.jsp

Excellent link! Thanks!

 

[PJM]

=Holly3278;4982251]Hi everyone. How do I get higher self-esteem without committing the sin of pride? I know that I have a serious self-esteem issue but I may also have a pride issue at time. My best friend tells me that when the Bible mentions pride, it just means not being egotistical. Is this true? Can I actually be proud of myself without committing the sin of pride?

Yes, but not to brag. Yes if your being honest with yourself.

The answer to your very thoughtful question is to "seek and OWN The TRUTH."

Here is the answer and an example of why not everyone has it.

*John 8: "31Jesus then said to the Jews who had believed in him, "If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples, 32 and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free."**COLOR=“Red”] 33 They answered him, “We are descendants of Abraham, and have never been in bondage to any one. How is it that you say, ‘You will be made free’?” ]

***Pope John Paul II ***spoke at length about TRUTH. He told us that we can deny it, alter it, ignore it, but nothing we can do can CHANGE IT! He also told us that for any single issue, at base, there can only “be one TRUTH.”

Pope Benedict XVI in his very first holily as our Pope, expalined that there cannot be “your truth” and “my truth” ot there would be “NO TRUTH.”

Once you possess THE TRUTH for have found WISDOM. You can annouce it with complete confidence, and because you “Own the truth” BUT ARE NOT the owner of it, their is no need, no upside to being proud about it, so what we do is simply share it.

This is pretty profound, hope it helps you?
Love and prayers,

 

[beckycmarie]

Holly,

Your dignity and worth as a person comes from the fact that you are created in the image and likeness of God, that you are His beloved child. Just imagine, you are the daughter of a King, the King of the universe! If you keep that in mind, that everything you are comes from Him, it can hardly become false pride.

Holly, I attended a parish mission recently given by Fr. Zachary of the Mother of God. He handed out a card containing this prayer, which I think you might like:

Most Holy Trinity, thank You for creating me out of nothing to know, love and serve You and be happy with You forever.

In Your Goodness, I am willed, loved and necessary. I am unique, precious, and unrepeatable.

Father, I desire to fulfull Your Divine Plan for my life. I take Jesus as my personal Lord and Savior. Holy Spirit, please annoint me to say yes to the Holy Will of God.

I take Our Blessed Mother, Mary, as my Spiritual Mother. I desire to have a living relationship with all the Holy Angels and Saints. I make this prayer in Jesus’ precious name. Amen.

 

[Holly3278]

Yes, but not to brag. Yes if your being honest with yourself.

The answer to your very thoughtful question is to "seek and OWN The TRUTH."

Here is the answer and an example of why not everyone has it.

*John 8: "31Jesus then said to the Jews who had believed in him, "If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples, 32 and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free."****COLOR=“Red”] 33 They answered him, “We are descendants of Abraham, and have never been in bondage to any one. How is it that you say, ‘You will be made free’?” **]

***Pope John Paul II ***spoke at length about TRUTH. He told us that we can deny it, alter it, ignore it, but nothing we can do can CHANGE IT! He also told us that for any single issue, at base, there can only “be one TRUTH.”

Pope Benedict XVI in his very first holily as our Pope, expalined that there cannot be “your truth” and “my truth” ot there would be “NO TRUTH.”

Once you possess THE TRUTH for have found WISDOM. You can annouce it with complete confidence, and because you “Own the truth” BUT ARE NOT the owner of it, their is no need, no upside to being proud about it, so what we do is simply share it.

This is pretty profound, hope it helps you?
Love and prayers,

Yes, it does help. Thanks!

Holly, I attended a parish mission recently given by Fr. Zachary of the Mother of God. He handed out a card containing this prayer, which I think you might like:

Oh ok, thanks for the prayer Becky! I do like it!

 

[LilyM]

Ah ok! Well that makes sense. So what you are saying is that I should feel like I can do anything with the help of Jesus Christ and always give Him the credit? (Just asking to make sure I got it right.)

You got it!

 

[Monica4316]

I don’t think you understand. Self-esteem is important because I have such low self-esteem that I am actually suicidal sometimes. I don’t think God wants us to go around thinking about how horrible we are all the time. Do you?

Holly, I really think that the solution might be trusting in God’s mercy more… it doesn’t mean trying to make us look better to ourselves… but rather, trying to see ourselves as God sees us - despite all the sin etc. How do you think God sees you? Well. you are His precious child and He loves you… try to see yourself, and everyone else, through His eyes. Then you won’t be proud, because you’ll be focusing on God and not on yourself…and you’ll see that you don’t have to prove yourself to Him, that He loves you as you are. God’s love is a gift and not something we can earn. We can’t be proud of it, it’s impossible, if we understand it. I wouldnt even call this “self esteem”…self esteem is thinking that you’re “good enough”… what I’m talking about is not focused on self, but simply realizing the love that Christ has for you and living in that love, and trusting in it…and then, showing it to others…

I think in doing this, a person doesn’t become proud, but no longer feels horrible either.

Feeling horrible about ourselves is not far from pride,because both are focused on self. The less we focus on self, the easier it will be to feel joy and also to be humble. But try to see yourself through God’s eyes, and remember who you are to Him…

God bless you

 

[Dtmccameron]

Self esteem?

“The secret of humility is not to think less of ourselves, but to think of ourselves less”

“One can never think to little of himself. On can never think to greatly of his soul” G.K. Chesterton (paraphrased)

 

[elizebeth123]

I was taught by a very spiritual woman that to "have self-esteem, we need to do esteem-able things. I try to keep this down when I feel low. example: I try to find someone to help that is worse off than me, I do the dishes, I go to weekly mass, I volunteer, I babysit, say the rosary. What I don’t do is: get my hair done, go shopping, think too much about myself…