How do you keep living with mortal sin?

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So, l am someone who is constantly committing mortal sins. Just to be clear, it’s not pornography or onanism. It’s impure thoughts and looking to impure images. I often confess twice a week, but then I sin again and the fact is that I am probably almost always in state of grave sin. So it’s like having a Sword of Damocles almost constantly on my head: if I die I probably go to Hell. And this situation has been going on for some years now. So I was wondering if there were many of you out there who experience the same thing. If yes, how do you cope with this feeling of constant danger? It is pretty disturbing to have to appear normal in a seemingly normal life while being destroyed and damned in the inside.
 
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We all have to make choices. We all see impure things walking down the street in skimpy clothes. I love string bikinis. God isn’t fond of them. Porn & impure images are the same thing. Here comes choices! You see a picture that is erotic. Choice:walk away, praying a prayer,for the soul of those,in the picture. PORN is someone’s daughter or son living in a state of mortal sin. If they died, their elevator goes down. That is a SAD thought. Think in the Spiritual plane, not the worldly plane. One day, you may be a parent. Loving that innocent kid. Then, seeing her/him rebel & live those disgusting lifestyles. If your parents knew you ENTERTAINING IMPURE THOUGHTS, it would break them.
AVOID THE OCCASSION OF SIN. If you see someone indecently exposed, could you go over to them & say God loves you and you’re a treasure. We aren’t sex toys. We are temples of the Holy Spirit. THINK! Memorize scripture verses of victory. I CAN DO ALL THINGS, THROUGH CHRIST, JESUS WHO STRENGTHENS ME! SIGH! Close eyes, turn away, praying for their souls.
God bless. You are an OVERCOMER.
Tweedlealice
 
It is good that you confess your mortal sins. What are you doing to overcome them?
 
Confession twice a week is quite frequent. Sometimes, too much thinking about sin and too much guilt actually fuels the sinfulness. You might consider discussing your struggles with a priest outside of the confessional. That will give him more time and freedom to counsel you about the cycle of forgiveness and guilt you seem to be describing. Oscillating constantly between God’s grace and condemnation is certainly not what Confession is about. That takes a great deal of energy.

Some find help in directing that energy to other activities, even hobbies. I know a priest who builds models of airplanes constantly. He told me it keeps him from sin and helps him keep his vows.

Explore your gifts, discover your own goodness, believe in your goodness, think positively about yourself and you’ll be amazed at the transformation that will take place. You might even find that you have little time for sin.

God’s love and mercy are constant. He understands our struggles. You need not doubt that.
 
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You could benefit from what is termed the custody of the eyes. We are visually stimulated creatures: artwork, the printed word, video - all forms of visual (name removed by moderator)ut. That (name removed by moderator)ut can be life-saving, or it can be life-threatening. We can choose to strive to control ourr senses - that over which we have the possibility of control. We can control our eyes and we are intended to control them.

Discipline your eyes, knowing that you will at first fail frequently. Consider: when you were one year old and fell while learning to walk, did you stay there on the floor? No! You got up and tried again. I’d guess you’re pretty good at this walking thing now.

So it is with the custody of the eyes. If you must cancel magazines, newspapers, cable - you name it - after an initial period of “separation anxiety” you will be able to exercise that custody of the eyes.

At first, if there is nothing sinful to view, you will not view it. You exercise this discipline until you are more proficient and sooner or later, you will look others only in the eyes - and see Christ.

You would not check His body out, would you? No different with any other.
 
Well I try to apply the advises of the priest. But it doesn’t seem to work. The temptation seems always stronger than my pathetic attempts at self-discipline.
 
tweedlealice said:
Think in the Spiritual plane, not the worldly plane. One day, you may be a parent. Loving that innocent kid. Then, seeing her/him rebel & live those disgusting lifestyles. If your parents knew you ENTERTAINING IMPURE THOUGHTS, it would break them.
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That’s a good advise. Thanks.
 
Are these fleeting tempting thoughts or continual imaginations of the mind?
 
opop said:
So, l am someone who is constantly committing mortal sins. Just to be clear, it’s not pornography or onanism. It’s impure thoughts and looking to impure images. I often confess twice a week, but then I sin again and the fact is that I am probably almost always in state of grave sin. So it’s like having a Sword of Damocles almost constantly on my head: if I die I probably go to Hell. And this situation has been going on for some years now. So I was wondering if there were many of you out there who experience the same thing. If yes, how do you cope with this feeling of constant danger? It is pretty disturbing to have to appear normal in a seemingly normal life while being destroyed and damned in the inside.
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I think the OP’s problem is with his premises, namely:
  • Impure thoughts are automatically mortal sin.
  • Seeing impure images is automatically mortal sin.
That fact that you confess twice a week means something is definitely wrong with your interpretation of some things.

Impure thoughts can come unbidden to anybody, anywhere, any time. In this day and age, you will run into impure images, magazine covers, billboards. That is unavoidable.

Thankfully, the Church does not teach as you think. Thankfully, God’s message of grace and mercy precludes the Damocles Sword image you have hanging over you.

You only sin if you consent. When you begin willfully lusting, when you willfully desire and objectify the person in the magazine of billboard. There is no need to wear blinders; only to keep custody of your thoughts and senses. When the thought comes, and you realize it, you dismiss it. If you see something inappropriate, you avert your eyes. Doesn’t matter that the thought came to you, or that you saw it.

Twice a week, something is definitely wrong, and it’s not your sinfulness. More probably, a twisted notion of sin and a lack of trust in God’s goodness and grace.
 
You may need deeper, lengthier assistance than confession is designed to provide. Perhaps scheduling a meeting with a priest outside the confessional would help you more effectively overcome the mortal sins you’re committing. A single appointment could clarify whether or not regular appointments - spiritual direction - would be beneficial.

Confession is a gift, and many graces can flow from it. Mortal sin, however isn’t something we’re supposed to find a way to keep living with - it’s something we’re supposed to stop.
 
UpUpAndAway said:
You may need deeper, lengthier assistance than confession is designed to provide. Perhaps scheduling a meeting with a priest outside the confessional would help you more effectively overcome the mortal sins you’re committing. A single appointment could clarify whether or not regular appointments - spiritual direction - would be beneficial.

Confession is a gift, and many graces can flow from it. Mortal sin, however isn’t something we’re supposed to find a way to keep living with - it’s something we’re supposed to stop.
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Thing is, I seriously doubt the OP is in actual mortal sin.
 
This, too, is a possibility. Speaking at length about it with a priest can help determine if this is the case and, if so, how to proceed from there. In my opinion, this conversation should still take place in the context of an appointment and not in the confessional…unless it has not yet been touched upon during Confession.
 
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OP, do you confess to the same priest all the time?
If not, it might be time to get a regular confessor, show him this post and ask him to help you.
 
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Objective mortal sins are often not actual mortal sins. In other words, gravely immoral acts are often not committed with the full culpability of actual mortal sin (full knowledge and full deliberation). Many factors can decrease culpability. Also, the thoughts and images you describe might not be gravely immoral in every case (can’t tell from your description). Then, too, if you repent promptly, with perfect contrition, you certainly avoid the danger of Hell.
 
Hi opop,I can’t really add to the good constructive help that has been given here but I will remember you in my prayers 🙂 Godbless.
 
opop said:
Well I try to apply the advises of the priest.
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Are you able to share what this was?
opop said:
But it doesn’t seem to work. The temptation seems always stronger than my pathetic attempts at self-discipline.
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I think you are describing a normal human condition, as described in the second half of Romans 7. None of us are able to overcome the flesh by our own “self-discipline”. Self disciplines are fine, but ultimately it is the Holy Spirit at work within us to will and to do His good pleasure that enables us to overcome temptation. As long as you are not overcoming by the Spirit, you will be enslaved by sin.

This is why you were asked what you are doing to help yourself.
 
Hi,
There may a thread of truth, in what you say, concerning a twice a week confession. When I was going to be a nun, it was once a week. There is grace w confession. I think, our friend, implied, he stayed involved w the thought or the impure vision. If that’s the case, entertaining them. That would be mortal. If you died, waiting for a weekly confession, but you sinned on Tues. I’d go Wed.! If I failed, again. I’d go Sat.
The problem is, his entertaining, the impure.
That, he needs to work w the confessor, on a program to be the victor over sin.
Just thinking.
God, let our thoughts be your thoughts, to guide, this child, out of his sinful ways. Let him feel the love of the community. Before Christ, the holiest Saints, were sinners. God’s grace brought them to Holiness. In Jesus name
Tweedlealice
 
tweedlealice said:
Hi,
There may a thread of truth, in what you say, concerning a twice a week confession. When I was going to be a nun, it was once a week. There is grace w confession. I think, our friend, implied, he stayed involved w the thought or the impure vision. If that’s the case, entertaining them. That would be mortal. If you died, waiting for a weekly confession, but you sinned on Tues. I’d go Wed.! If I failed, again. I’d go Sat.
The problem is, his entertaining, the impure.
That, he needs to work w the confessor, on a program to be the victor over sin.
Just thinking.
God, let our thoughts be your thoughts, to guide, this child, out of his sinful ways. Let him feel the love of the community. Before Christ, the holiest Saints, were sinners. God’s grace brought them to Holiness. In Jesus name
Tweedlealice
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No, I highly doubt it. Day in day out, we are bombarded by images and thoughts. There is nothing in the opening post that even implies he entertained looking at images. In fact, he stated it’s not pornography, so it’s probably images of a “sexy” nature, but not crossing the line into obscene. Further, it sounds like he is aware of it, so more likely than not, he tries to avert his eyes and not focus on it. What bothers him is that he’s already seen the image, and is therefore in grave sin.

If this is the case, and I’m certain it is, he is wrong. I hardly think one can be in a “constant” state of grave sin when one is so conscious of avoiding it. Living in this kind of fear is not the way Christ or the Church wants us to live. Ours is a joyful, liberating religion, not one of bondage. I’m pretty sure he is being too hard on himself, and in fact, I detect hints of dangerous Luther-like guilt. He needs to have this addressed with a confessor.
 
OK! I pray your right. Either way, we want him to see a Confessor for Counsel on this subject. A face to face person is always good to discern things, that can be misunderstood in writing.
In Christ’s Love
Tweedlealice
 
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