How have you navigated paying on a first date?

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There are other ways of dealing with that, just sharing for the girls reading.

First, know the guys reputation. If he’s going to try something sleazy you likely aren’t the first.

Do not order anything expensive…my go-to was a salad.

As for men expecting something…you should never be in a position on the first few dates where he could push the issue. People should know where you are and when to expect you. Stay in populated areas.
 
Men are still typically the main breadwinners in most families. Generally, men continue to pay the lion’s share even after dating and into marriage. There’s nothing wrong with that. We have the babies.
 
twf said:
It’s a very convenient legacy of a bygone era of men as providers / leaders…
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I found that having a man pay on a date was actually a good indicator of a man’s attitude towards money. I didn’t want to have a relationship with somebody who was a cheapskate or a sponge, nor did I want someone who threw money around like a drunken sailor or thought spending lots of money was a way to impress people.

In the back of your mind as a woman on a date is the thought that this man, if you marry him, is going to likely father some kids and will need to be a father to them, which includes providing for them. I don’t need a man to pay my way, but I would expect a man to step up and provide for any children he might father, as that’s what fathers do, especially since having children and caring for them is likely to impact a woman’s ability to get out there and earn money.

I’m sure the men were looking at my spending habits as well, like did I order the most expensive thing on the menu, did I expect them to buy me fancy presents or take me places that they couldn’t afford, etc.
 
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Imo I feel like who gets to pay depends on the situation.

If we’re both students, I would feel really bad if he pays and I would offer to split.

If he chooses the venue/asked me out and I know he’s in a decent financial situation, I would expect him to pay. It wouldn’t be a deal breaker if we ended up splitting the cheque, unless it’s too expensive and he was the one that chose the restaurant (lol)
 
Since you asked her, I’d say you pay. If she offers to split the tab, accept her offer.

If you start seeing giant warning signs, red flags, and hear alarms going off halfway through the meal, then politely excuse yourself to go to the restroom, and RUN!

(that was a joke, btw)
 
This article didn’t differentiate between two-parent families and single-parent families. I wonder how separating those two would change the numbers?
 
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