How many friends have you lost this year because they can't stand that you're a faithful Catholic?

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“If the world hates you, you know that it has hated Me before it hated you.” John 15:18

So says the second Person of the Blessed Trinity.

It is painful and hard, but just remember that it is not supposed to be easy. Hang in there–you are doing the right thing. It doesn’t sound like you are intentionally pick arguments–tolerance is a two way street.
 
I’ve lost an amazing amount of social contacts. I was very liberal before converting. No one quite knows what to think anymore. Hardly anyone still posts on my Facebook anymore. My brother hates the Church, is gay, and we are further apart than ever now. I do have new friends. I go to daily mass, pray the liturgy of the hours, am joining a third order. Still, I’m not a Republican and doubt I will ever be. I’ve barely grasped that they are not the “enemy.”

My parents were democrat and pro-life, pro gun rights, etc. I’m not a democrat anymore because Obama makes me sick over his anti-Catholicism. Also, I’ve learned progressivism and “nanny state” go hand in hand.

So, I’m a solid independent, but NOT moderate because I have strong pro-life and strong anti-greed ethics. Nobody can relate to me much on politics. So, I try to avoid them. I find it bizarre that people avoid me now because I think for myself and don’t just follow party lines. Wake up, zombies!
 
I think all of my friends are faithful Catholics. It’s my relatives who are not…faithful that is…they are mostly all Catholic. I haven’t lost one friends or relative, even the ones that are not Catholic, because we all respect each others beliefs.
 
It’s been frustrating for me because I’ve only recently came back into the church as a faithful Catholic.

I haven’t lost any friends because of my faith but I know I’ve had to cut ties with some good friends of mine because I know they would despise me if they really knew the truth.

I’ve got several lesbian friends in various stages of relationships, including marriage, from my old job.

I used to be a paramedic before I got married and started my family. I was one of the very few straight girls that worked the job in my town.

They were all wonderful girls and I supported them…I even was roommates with one of the girls I was closest with for a year before she “married” her long time girlfriend.

Since I’ve come back into the Church…I haven’t exactly told them how I feel…I just cut most of my contact with them. I got rid of facebook and choose to let them be.

I recently saw my old roommate with her wife on the fourth. She told me how dissapointed she was that I wasn’t on facebook anymore. I smiled and just said it was a personal decision and left it at that.

I wish I could let them know what happened but I know I can’t…it’s better for all of us if I just silently cut ties.
 
Amythyst said:
I’ve lost an amazing amount of social contacts. I was very liberal before converting. No one quite knows what to think anymore. Hardly anyone still posts on my Facebook anymore. My brother hates the Church, is gay, and we are further apart than ever now. I do have new friends. I go to daily mass, pray the liturgy of the hours, am joining a third order. Still, I’m not a Republican and doubt I will ever be. I’ve barely grasped that they are not the “enemy.”

My parents were democrat and pro-life, pro gun rights, etc. I’m not a democrat anymore because Obama makes me sick over his anti-Catholicism. Also, I’ve learned progressivism and “nanny state” go hand in hand.

So, I’m a solid independent, but NOT moderate because I have strong pro-life and strong anti-greed ethics. Nobody can relate to me much on politics. So, I try to avoid them. I find it bizarre that people avoid me now because I think for myself and don’t just follow party lines. Wake up, zombies!
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You and I sound quite alike in our political views!

Everyone who’s responded on this thread has really helped me feel not alone. And - God works in mysterious ways - I got a response from the friend I’d thought I’d lost and it sounded as if she’d been willing to consider what I said in a reasonable manner. She explained what had bothered her and though I can’t go against Church teaching to please her, it was a relief to know what the trigger was.

Also, during the time I thought perhaps all was lost, I was given the grace to surrender the matter - and the friend - into God’s hands. Most of the time I’m a worrier even though I know I shouldn’t be. :o So this was a real gift. I realize this friend is one I’m going to have to keep on surrendering to God! Arguments aren’t going to convince her, and really I’ve always known that, it’s just been driven home to me more strongly in this contentious year of Our Lord 2012.

We’re both in agreement it’s best not to be on each other’s Facebook, that relieves tension. 😉

Love the sinner, hate the sin. (And I’m a sinner, too.)
 
Oneofthewomen said:
I have not “lost” any friends or family members because of being a faithful Catholic. What has happened is that I have changed and the people that I hang out with, for the most part, have not.

It like a dance, at one time we were all doing the same steps, then I learned a new dance. I tried to share it with them, but some felt it too complicated, some liked the dance they were doing and didn’t want to change, and others were mad at me for upsetting the rhythm. So a decision had to be made, continue to do my new dance with partners who don’t know the steps and end up with bruised & battered feet, or find some new partners.
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I love how you put that. It’s similar to a lot of what I’ve been through. I know my experiences of the last few years have forced me to grow and become a different person, although deep down I know that I’m fundamentally still the same person I’ve always been (if that makes sense). What’s really distressing is that while it feels as though the people who are most upset with me are no longer the same people I’ve known all my life, when I take a step back and look at things, I see that they’re actually just the same as they’ve always been. it’s funny what a different perspective can do to a situation.
 
This is a great question. And it really goes with yesterday’s Sunday July 8, liturgy. ***7/8/2012 verses (locations) with my synopsis after the dashes ( - ).
**Ez 2:2-5 - ** Ezekiel is sent by God to the “hard of face and obstinate of heart” Israelites to warn them.

Ps 123:1-2, 2, 3-4 - Psalmist pleads for the Lord’s mercy after suffering the “mockery of the arrogant” and the “contempt of the proud.”

**2 Cor 12:7-10 - ** Paul shares the insight that his unanswered prayers for a healing are part of God’s plan to show forth His strength in Paul’s weakness. He heroically accepts the “weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions and constraints” that plague him and goes forth anyway.

Mk 6:1-6 - Jesus goes “home” to preach in the synagogue and is not accepted, despite his astounding teaching, healings and works. His audience can’t get over his past, class, and humble social standing. They have no faith in Him and went so far “they took offense at Him.”
 
CaptFun said:
This is a great question. And it really goes with yesterday’s Sunday July 8, liturgy. ***7/8/2012 verses (locations) with my synopsis after the dashes ( - ).
**Ez 2:2-5 - ** Ezekiel is sent by God to the “hard of face and obstinate of heart” Israelites to warn them.

Ps 123:1-2, 2, 3-4 - Psalmist pleads for the Lord’s mercy after suffering the “mockery of the arrogant” and the “contempt of the proud.”

**2 Cor 12:7-10 - ** Paul shares the insight that his unanswered prayers for a healing are part of God’s plan to show forth His strength in Paul’s weakness. He heroically accepts the “weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions and constraints” that plague him and goes forth anyway.

Mk 6:1-6 - Jesus goes “home” to preach in the synagogue and is not accepted, despite his astounding teaching, healings and works. His audience can’t get over his past, class, and humble social standing. They have no faith in Him and went so far “they took offense at Him.”
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You’re right. I noticed that trend in the Scripture and I was a little disappointed that the priest didn’t talk touch on that during his homily. I think with what is going on in the world right now, we could all use the encouragement.
 
In the local cosplaying scene, I feel somewhat isolated simply because I am a Catholic. :eek:
 
Nope, haven’t lost any, but made loads at our parish!!😉

I am a faithfull Catholic and an Independent (leaning Dem) voter and NO, I’m not a one issue voter. There are many people with independent views in my church groups and professional organizations, and most are middle of the road in their views, neither raging wacko right wingers or crazy leftists. 🤷

I dare say that in the world, there are far more people like me than not.
 
What a great and timely question. I can definitely relate, not that I’ve lost a friend but because I’ve been wondering lately how best to handle situations where protestant friends sometimes get offended or develop misconceptions about Catholics.

I have experienced some anger issues coming from protestant friends, and I may post a separate question myself about how best to respond when this is happening.

There are so many misconceptions out there about our Faith, (some believe we actually worship statues, some are deeply rooted into Martin Luther’s writings or have great pride in their particular protestant heritage. All these things do not make for close friendships.

My Facebook page is nearly 100 percent devoted to posting the truth and beauty and divine continuity of our Church through historical fact, artwork and various essays I have found to be helpful when I myself was considering entering RCIA.

So far, only one person came forward to defend his protestant beliefs, but we are still friends.

I completely empathize with anyone losing a friend due to our Faith. I know we are to love all people, and yet it is hard when this happens.

All prayers for you and anyone going through this. We can be strong and yet we can still hurt deeply at the loss of a friendship.

Kathryn Ann
 
Almost all of my Facebook friends, and that means the same for my real life friends, are atheist liberals. I don’t hold anything back on Facebook, I stand up for life and traditional marriage and Catholics values, and I share pro-life posts all the time. I have gotten into arguments with the occasional intolerant person who will not see my point of view and who defriends me. I never defriend anyone because of posting pro-abortion or anti-Catholic material, but I may hide their posts.

I had a particular problem recently with my ex-fiancee. She lives in Spain. We were engaged to be married four years ago, when she visited me out here in the States. Then I went to visit her in Spain and it all fell apart. Around the same time, I realized that though we were both Catholic, our views on sex and marriage were very far apart. She supports abortion and gay marriage. She takes great offense at my postings on Facebook, and she has called me “extremist”, “brainwashed”, “hateful”; and she fails to see the irony here. A couple months ago, she informed me regretfully that I had lost her as a friend. This disturbed me greatly because I consider her a very dear friend, we get along well despite these differences, and we play a game online in which we work together in the same pirate crew and flag. After losing her friendship I decided to leave the crew and flag and strike out on my own. A few weeks later she called me on the phone, and said she had attempted to mail back the rosary I gave her, and she found she couldn’t do it, she couldn’t let go of me, and this was a Real Life thing, not just about our online friendship. She begged me to take her back and I agreed.

Since that incident, I have created a special group on Facebook. It is populated by almost all my friends, except the ones I would certainly lose if they saw what I posted on a regular basis. I lock all my postings to this group; if I get in a significant argument or encounter intolerance from a particular friend then I take them out of this group and they never see my postings again. It is regrettable that I have to do this, but I want my pro-life message heard by as wide an audience as possible, and that means that the liberal atheists in my friends list have to see my posts for my evangelization to be effective.
 
Amythyst said:
I’ve lost an amazing amount of social contacts. I was very liberal before converting. No one quite knows what to think anymore. Hardly anyone still posts on my Facebook anymore. My brother hates the Church, is gay, and we are further apart than ever now. I do have new friends. I go to daily mass, pray the liturgy of the hours, am joining a third order. Still, I’m not a Republican and doubt I will ever be. I’ve barely grasped that they are not the “enemy.”

My parents were democrat and pro-life, pro gun rights, etc. I’m not a democrat anymore because Obama makes me sick over his anti-Catholicism. Also, I’ve learned progressivism and “nanny state” go hand in hand.

So, I’m a solid independent, but NOT moderate because I have strong pro-life and strong anti-greed ethics. Nobody can relate to me much on politics. So, I try to avoid them. I find it bizarre that people avoid me now because I think for myself and don’t just follow party lines. Wake up, zombies!
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It sounds like I’m with you in that political boat! I’m also in a third order.
 
I might be remembering things poorly, but it seems to me that about 20 years ago, people could disagree with each other, without all this boiling and steaming and harshness.

Where’s the love?
 
Elizium23 said:
Since that incident, I have created a special group on Facebook. It is populated by almost all my friends, except the ones I would certainly lose if they saw what I posted on a regular basis. I lock all my postings to this group; if I get in a significant argument or encounter intolerance from a particular friend then I take them out of this group and they never see my postings again. It is regrettable that I have to do this, but I want my pro-life message heard by as wide an audience as possible, and that means that the liberal atheists in my friends list have to see my posts for my evangelization to be effective.
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I am rarely on Facebook. Even though I am rarely on Facebook, I have not added any Catholics to my Facebook. My Facebook is full of liberals as well as some of my coworkers. Two high level people on my job are gay. I am frankly afraid that some of my rad trad friends will post some rants that might get me in trouble with my job. :eek:
 
Captain_America said:
I might be remembering things poorly, but it seems to me that about 20 years ago, people could disagree with each other, without all this boiling and steaming and harshness.

Where’s the love?
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At least with the people I know, the biggest problem is rabid, blind devotion to the Church of Liberalism. Or Progressivism, Secularism, whatever you want to call it. My conservative and practicing Catholic friends tend to stay level-headed and calm while discussing things. They recognize the fact that other people have differing opinions and are entitled to them, no matter how wrong or harebrained they may be. My liberal friends are the flip-side of the Westboro Baptists. Not that they’d admit that because they’re 100% correct in each and every situation, but several in particular instantly resort to throwing around the f-bombs and calling you a racist and/or Nazi if you even hint at disagreement with them. Not only is even a whiff of dissent evilly wrong, but you need to be viciously and personally attacked for even thinking that you’re entitled to have beliefs that don’t line up with theirs (and, let’s face it, it’s far easier to do that than to try to actually argue against an opposing viewpoint).

One example that always springs to mind is several years ago when I disagreed with something my one cousin said about some political issue. I can’t remember if it was the environment, gun control, George Bush or whatever; it wasn’t a huge issue but they’d made a false statement and I countered it with something I’d happened to read a day earlier. Instead of addressing what I’d said, she turned to my wife and said she’d expect that from “someone like him,” then told her that I’d cheated on her at a party years earlier. It wasn’t true and the situation was quickly defused, but it got me and the few other non-liberals in the family to quit discussing anything political with her to avoid having her make claims like that around our kids. At the time I didn’t consider cutting ties with my family as an option, but she’s one of the primary reasons we no longer see that side of my extended family.
 
Gordon_Sims said:
At least with the people I know, the biggest problem is rabid, blind devotion to the Church of Liberalism. Or Progressivism, Secularism, whatever you want to call it. My conservative and practicing Catholic friends tend to stay level-headed and calm while discussing things. They recognize the fact that other people have differing opinions and are entitled to them, no matter how wrong or harebrained they may be. My liberal friends are the flip-side of the Westboro Baptists. Not that they’d admit that because they’re 100% correct in each and every situation, but several in particular instantly resort to throwing around the f-bombs and calling you a racist and/or Nazi if you even hint at disagreement with them. Not only is even a whiff of dissent evilly wrong, but you need to be viciously and personally attacked for even thinking that you’re entitled to have beliefs that don’t line up with theirs (and, let’s face it, it’s far easier to do that than to try to actually argue against an opposing viewpoint)..
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What hurts me most is when I’m portrayed as a hateful person lacking in compassion. 😦

I keep thinking of that line someone on CAF has as their signature, “Friends don’t let friends drive themselves to Hell.” Now lest anyone presume that I’m presuming that I know who’s going to Hell or not, let me hasten to add that all I’m saying is that if we’re on the road and I see them take the exit marked “Sin Road” :rolleyes: I know where it could lead them. And it’s not a place I want to see anybody I care about end up. In fact, we’re to have zeal for souls such that we wouldn’t want to see anyone end up there - Jesus said there’s more rejoicing over the 1 lost sheep brought back than the 99 already safely in the fold.
 
3DOCTORS said:
What hurts me most is when I’m portrayed as a hateful person lacking in compassion. 😦
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I was discussing Obamacare before it was passed with a couple liberal friends. I said I was opposed to it and before I could explain myself one said, “So you’re in favor of killing babies?!?” Their argument was that me being opposed to it meant that I was in favor of millions of American children dying every day because they don’t have access to proper health care (throw in lots of expletives to get the full effect). Both of them jumped on this and started berating me for my anti-children stance. When I finally got a word in and mentioned my opposition to it forcing people to buy something they don’t want and it using taxpayer dollars for abortion and contraception, they started in with the anti-woman arguments and claimed that not only did I want to murder babies, but I wanted to see scores of women dying as well due to them not getting the care (abortions and contraception) they need.
 
Gordon_Sims said:
At least with the people I know, the biggest problem is rabid, blind devotion to the Church of Liberalism. Or Progressivism, Secularism, whatever you want to call it. My conservative and practicing Catholic friends tend to stay level-headed and calm while discussing things. They recognize the fact that other people have differing opinions and are entitled to them, no matter how wrong or harebrained they may be. My liberal friends are the flip-side of the Westboro Baptists. Not that they’d admit that because they’re 100% correct in each and every situation, but several in particular instantly resort to throwing around the f-bombs and calling you a racist and/or Nazi if you even hint at disagreement with them. Not only is even a whiff of dissent evilly wrong, but you need to be viciously and personally attacked for even thinking that you’re entitled to have beliefs that don’t line up with theirs (and, let’s face it, it’s far easier to do that than to try to actually argue against an opposing viewpoint).

One example that always springs to mind is several years ago when I disagreed with something my one cousin said about some political issue. I can’t remember if it was the environment, gun control, George Bush or whatever; it wasn’t a huge issue but they’d made a false statement and I countered it with something I’d happened to read a day earlier. Instead of addressing what I’d said, she turned to my wife and said she’d expect that from “someone like him,” then told her that I’d cheated on her at a party years earlier. It wasn’t true and the situation was quickly defused, but it got me and the few other non-liberals in the family to quit discussing anything political with her to avoid having her make claims like that around our kids. At the time I didn’t consider cutting ties with my family as an option, but she’s one of the primary reasons we no longer see that side of my extended family.
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I get called all sorts of expletives whenever I sanely debate with mostly American liberal-progressives. They cannot understand my positions, and my positions are clear. To them, my positions are an affront.
 
Considering I was in the Goth and Industrial Scene as well as the Rave Scene for over ten years. I’ve lost pretty much everybody. No one posts on my facebook except for my family or friends who i know through AA or rehab or whatever. Most of my old friends are still doing drugs and involved in the occult or going to festivals that involve pagan Idol worship.

I was very liberal now I’m very conservative. My old friends were such beautiful people but they were leading me to my own destruction. The only two I still talk to are ex girlfriends and they are difficult at best.
 
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