It’s not really that I find it boring or anything. I actually deem it important if the occasion demands for it and would scold myself for not focusing
It’s really more of that feeling fake and hypocritical that keeps me from doing it. It’s just not me. There’s just so many things about myself that would reflect badly on the Church if I ever exhibited extra-pious behavior. I’m happy just sticking to the political positions and contemplating the moral philosophy of Christianity. Spirituality on the other hand well… let’s just say the option of putting myself to the Saint-standard is just too high and too many. >_>;;
Good to know you realize its importance. Focusing is the least of the problems. Don’t beat yourself up about it! Everyone can lose focus, the point is to put your heart into it when you do it. If you gave it up because you tend to lose focus once in a while, you’d be giving up a LOT of things in your life.
I don’t understand exactly what you mean by feeling “fake and hypocritical”. I’d hope it’s not because it’s prayer, which is something we all must do. Perhaps you see the Rosary as “extra credit” (therefore something you don’t really need)? It’s true you’re not obligated to say it, I just wonder what you meant by that.
Remember that we’re ALL called to be saints. That doesn’t mean everybody has to turn into a visible saint like the ones canonized, because there’s many saints who go unknown. Everyone in heaven is a saint (thus why we have “all saint’s day” in a few days), so it’s what we should be aiming for.
I’d encourage you to give the prayer another try.
I started since late last year, saying the rosary daily thanks to
rosaryarmy.com/
I didn’t know where to start, so instead I followed along with them. Eventually I also made my own knotted rosary using their instructions (very pretty).
At first it was exercise along with the rosary daily, to keep me in shape and to separate a time where I’d always say the rosary. Now I don’t always do it with exercise and I can also say that I’ve gained a lot from it.
I also feel bad on the days I don’t pray it because I kept pushing it back. It’s not because I didn’t pray it but the reason why I didn’t. We can always make time for prayer if we really tried. If you’ve really got “no time”, there’s the commute, you can break it up in parts and say it throughout whatever breaks you may have. I hope those days of “I’ll do it later” are over (or at the very least that I DO say it later).
).
Whenever you’re ready, she’ll be waiting.
