How often do you do to Confession?

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palmas85 said:
I understand exactly what you are saying. I am well aware that quite often people aren’t clean as you say both in and out of marriage. Thats actually a well known fact, sad as it is. It doesn’t change things one iota and in reality it doesn’t really matter. The Church says that the use of artificial methods in birth control is wrong. Period. Its wrong and it is not permitted. It makes no exceptions and permits none. Sorry. This teaching is hard, difficult to accept and hard to live with. But it is what the Church teaches and we as Catholics are bound to it. As I said the encyclical Humanae Vitae caused quite a firestorm of protest when it came out and still does. I suggest you read it.

No the Bible does not specifically state anything about artificial birth control. Neither does it speak about cloning human beings or the use of nerve gas in warfare, the existance of other planets or the existance of the atom. In fact there are a myriad of things that the Bible is silent on. That is the problem with sola scriptura. Relying on the Bible to have an answer for each and every question is life is unrealistic. That is why the Church is so vitally important. It gives us the answers, through Divine inspiration and revelation that scripture does not.

If the teachings of the Church are too hard for you and you cannot accept them, then perhaps you should look for another faith that is more accommodating or easier to deal with. No one has ever claimed that being a Catholic is easy. In fact, that is one of the oft stated reasons for people leaving the Church to worship elsewhere. Too many rules, too much legalism.

Catholicism is not a democracy where people are free to pick choose and refuse what they will or will not accept. There are faiths where that is permitted and even encouraged.

The Protestants and they are always looking for ways to pull Catholics away from the faith…

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I have never stated which religon i follow but it is clear why i dont follow any at all, people tend to make things up as they go along so i wouldnt like to be labeled…
Jesus never preached in a church or insisted on priest to confess through, In my opinion that is why the jews persicuted him, Because he was trying to say that you can reach God through your own mind and not through someone else [priests/bishops etc…] If people realised that then it would have put alot of people out of a job as we wouldnt need priests etc…
As for confession i have needed to because i believe honestly that i havent done anything wong in my life to need it but if i did need it i’m pretty sure God would listen to me just as much as a priest.
 
Confession is really my last hurdle I think. During the RCIA process they told us we weren’t supposed to go to confession until right before our confirmation…so I didn’t really spend a lot of time thinking about it until I was already ready to be confirmed. I confessed what I thought were mortal sins based on what people told me…but then I found out tons of stuff could be considered mortal.

Confession is way to anxiety producing for me. I get sick before I go and sick afterwards. Physically ill. It is not a wonderful experience like all of you claim it to be. Not for me. Maybe it is due to my anxiety disorder…I don’t know. When I was protestant I could beg God’s mercy and ask Him to forgive me through Christ and I had faith that I was forgiven. I’m trying my best to be a good Catholic so when I am aware of a mortal sin I may have committed I go, but it is pure torture. The fact that confession bothers me so much just inspires me to never go back again and therefore never knowingly commit a mortal sin if I can help it.

I don’t understand how people can go once a week b/c what in the world do you talk about!!! My priest always seems bored if I don’t talk about a mortal sin…and therefore I see no point in me being there.

Probably be easier for me if I was born and raised Catholic b/c I just don’t understand really why I’m having such a hard time with this.
 
palmas85 said:
I guess that all depends on your definition of a mortal sin doesn’t it? Many people commit acts that are in reality mortal sins but they explain them away as not being so or rationalize in their mind that they are somehow less culpable for one reason or another. I see that happen a lot.

For instance, I know a couple, good people, living together without benefit of marriage, with two kids and one on the way. At Mass every week, receive Holy Communion every week, attend reconciliation once a year around Easter. They have no intention of changing their lifestyle as it is their choice to live the way they want. They rationalize their conduct in this way:

They are committed to each other
They cannot afford marriage
It is better for them to be in a committed monogamous relationship than not to be in one
They never miss Mass

Therefore, their illicit sexual relations are OK and not mortal sins.

See how easy it is to rationalize conduct?
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There is a difference between rationalizing and not commiting a mortal sin because there is no deliberate consent. The couple you are describing proabaly fully know that their living together is a sin according to the Church, but they deliberatly choose to ignore the teaching thinking that they know better what is sinful to them. Their going to communion anyway is a deliberate decision as much as their living together is, because if they have been going to mass each week and are “good Catholics” they know the teaching. The same thing with birth control.

What I am talking about is not that extreme. For example, anger is a deadly sin, but if a situation occurs where I get angry with someone, say for cutting me off on the road or because of an injustice done to me, and I start yelling without even thinking, am I committing a deadly sin? I know anger is a sin (condition one). Did I have full knowledge that I was committing a sin when I got angry (condition 2) ? Probably not since it happens so quickly without thinking. Did I do it anyway (condition 3) knowing it was a grave matter? Again I would say no. I did not have time to carefully consider my actions and commit the sin anyway not caring that it was sinful. I am not saying that in a situation like this there is no sin in getting angry, but it is not mortal because the three conditions are not met.
 
Joannm said:
There is a difference between rationalizing and not commiting a mortal sin because there is no deliberate consent. The couple you are describing proabaly fully know that their living together is a sin according to the Church, but they deliberatly choose to ignore the teaching thinking that they know better what is sinful to them. Their going to communion anyway is a deliberate decision as much as their living together is, because if they have been going to mass each week and are “good Catholics” they know the teaching. The same thing with birth control.

What I am talking about is not that extreme. For example, anger is a deadly sin, but if a situation occurs where I get angry with someone, say for cutting me off on the road or because of an injustice done to me, and I start yelling without even thinking, am I committing a deadly sin? I know anger is a sin (condition one). Did I have full knowledge that I was committing a sin when I got angry (condition 2) ? Probably not since it happens so quickly without thinking. Did I do it anyway (condition 3) knowing it was a grave matter? Again I would say no. I did not have time to carefully consider my actions and commit the sin anyway not caring that it was sinful. I am not saying that in a situation like this there is no sin in getting angry, but it is not mortal because the three conditions are not met.
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Sounds like you rationalized that one pretty well!👍
 
Carolinagirl411 said:
Confession is really my last hurdle I think. During the RCIA process they told us we weren’t supposed to go to confession until right before our confirmation…so I didn’t really spend a lot of time thinking about it until I was already ready to be confirmed. I confessed what I thought were mortal sins based on what people told me…but then I found out tons of stuff could be considered mortal.

Confession is way to anxiety producing for me. I get sick before I go and sick afterwards. Physically ill. It is not a wonderful experience like all of you claim it to be. Not for me. Maybe it is due to my anxiety disorder…I don’t know. When I was protestant I could beg God’s mercy and ask Him to forgive me through Christ and I had faith that I was forgiven. I’m trying my best to be a good Catholic so when I am aware of a mortal sin I may have committed I go, but it is pure torture. The fact that confession bothers me so much just inspires me to never go back again and therefore never knowingly commit a mortal sin if I can help it.

I don’t understand how people can go once a week b/c what in the world do you talk about!!! My priest always seems bored if I don’t talk about a mortal sin…and therefore I see no point in me being there.

Probably be easier for me if I was born and raised Catholic b/c I just don’t understand really why I’m having such a hard time with this.
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I was born and raised Catholic and for many years I had great anxiety about confession because of an incident that happened to me in confession when I was 12. What cured me was finding a very good confessor who also became a good friend. I can tell him anything without fear or anxiety because he is so good a confessor. I would suggest fininding one priest that you can go to regularly. I would say I don’t commit mortal sins often but there are some nagging venial sins that I repeat. I have found, over the years that I have stopped committing some of those sins because this priest and I have talked about them and he suggested ways to stop the behaviors.
 
Carolinagirl411 said:
Confession is really my last hurdle I think. During the RCIA process they told us we weren’t supposed to go to confession until right before our confirmation…so I didn’t really spend a lot of time thinking about it until I was already ready to be confirmed. I confessed what I thought were mortal sins based on what people told me…but then I found out tons of stuff could be considered mortal.

Confession is way to anxiety producing for me. I get sick before I go and sick afterwards. Physically ill. It is not a wonderful experience like all of you claim it to be. Not for me. Maybe it is due to my anxiety disorder…I don’t know. When I was protestant I could beg God’s mercy and ask Him to forgive me through Christ and I had faith that I was forgiven. I’m trying my best to be a good Catholic so when I am aware of a mortal sin I may have committed I go, but it is pure torture. The fact that confession bothers me so much just inspires me to never go back again and therefore never knowingly commit a mortal sin if I can help it.

I don’t understand how people can go once a week b/c what in the world do you talk about!!! My priest always seems bored if I don’t talk about a mortal sin…and therefore I see no point in me being there.

Probably be easier for me if I was born and raised Catholic b/c I just don’t understand really why I’m having such a hard time with this.
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Your confession isn’t for your priest’s entertainment, amusement or edification - it’s for the good of your soul.

I’m sure your dentist probably gets bored having to work on people’s teeth all day, but they would be the first to agree that it is both an important and a necessary thing to do regardless. So I am sure your priest would probably (and should always) say the same about confession, if you asked him.

As for not liking confession - well, it’s like cleaning the house, most people don’t enjoy actually doing it, but they certainly appreciate having a clean house after it’s done! Frequent confession, and confession of venial sins, is preventative - it gives you the graces to better resist future sin. Think of it as being like taking aspirin to prevent a heart attack.

The first thing to do is pray before you go to confession - offer God the anxiety and the nerves and all the rest of it in atonement for the sins you are about to confess. It’s bound to make your time in purgatory waaaaaaaay shorter if you do!

Then take some time afterwards to think about the joy Christ said there is in heaven over one sinner who repents - more than over ninety nine souls who don’t need to :heaven: and picture God the Father rejoicing over you like the father of the Prodigal Son.

I go somewhere between weekly and fortnightly. What do I talk about? The just man falls seven times a day, if you’re honest with yourself there’s ALWAYS something to talk about!
 
whiteknite said:
How can the use of artificial birth control be evil??
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Because the two purposes of sex are unity and procreation. Artificial birth control frustrates one or both of these objectives.
You never heard of sexualy transmited diseases??
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Married people who are faithful to each other can’t get sexually transmitted diseases.

It is already a sin to have sex outside of marriage, even without using birth control, because sex is a promise you make with your body. An unmarried person (or a married person having sex with someone who is not his or her spouse) cannot be faithful to the promises that his or her body is making during sex - and why would you want to make promises that you have no intention of keeping, or no ability to keep?

You are not allowed to get married if you have a sexually transmitted disease - that is against human law. You would go to jail for it, plus the fact that they would say that your marriage was not legal.
 
Carolinagirl411 said:
Ok, I have another question about confession

Catholics believe that if you commit a mortal sin…with the 3 criteria being met, and you do not go to a priest, and then you die, you can go to hell…so…I’m guessing most protestants are going to hell?
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From the human point of view, that seems like the most likely scenario, yes. The Protestant Reformers certainly didn’t do their children and grandchildren any favours, I don’t think.

Of course, God is not bound by the Sacraments, and can let anyone into Heaven that He wants, but we here on the ground shouldn’t make any assumptions about being the one in a million exception to the rules - instead, we should assume that the rules do apply to us, and follow them as best we can.
 
jmcrae said:
Because the two purposes of sex are unity and procreation. Artificial birth control frustrates one or both of these objectives.

Married people who are faithful to each other can’t get sexually transmitted diseases.

It is already a sin to have sex outside of marriage, even without using birth control, because sex is a promise you make with your body. An unmarried person (or a married person having sex with someone who is not his or her spouse) cannot be faithful to the promises that his or her body is making during sex - and why would you want to make promises that you have no intention of keeping, or no ability to keep?

You are not allowed to get married if you have a sexually transmitted disease - that is against human law. You would go to jail for it, plus the fact that they would say that your marriage was not legal.
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If a man or woman has for example :- Warts on his/her hands and dont treat them and use the loo for example.
Then chances are they get warts on there genatals, you understand as some people dont check often these things.
they tend to get passed on and if they do check but inside of marriage decide to have sex and cant wait then im sure useing
Artificial birth control might help.
I seen this on a medical program on channel 4 through the week and it made sense ]
And for instance you have a blood transfusion and find you have aids but find the need for sex with your legaly married partner, Then protection would therefore be needed…
 
jmcrae said:
You are not allowed to get married if you have a sexually transmitted disease - that is against human law. You would go to jail for it, plus the fact that they would say that your marriage was not legal.
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What!? I’ve never heard this. I know some people that are married with STDs or STIs whichever you prefer. Why do you think they have all those herpes commercials on tv for valtrex with the man saying “I still have herpes” and the woman saying “I still don’t”

If it was against the law then these people would be in jail and not on a widely televised commercial lol You are REQUIRED by law to inform the person of your disease if you are aware of it. They make these medications so you can have a safe married life. What are they going to do, be ostracized like a leper colony if they have an STD? A lot of people get them b/c some ignorant person they slept with didn’t tell them, or they were raped! Rape is not a sin if you are a victim. Sleeping with someone outside of marriage IS, however, everyone makes mistakes and sins.

I would be interested if you could provide information on this law. I do not have an STD nor does my fiance, lol but I just find that a tad bit ridiculous about the whole jail thing.
 
Carolinagirl411 said:
What!? I’ve never heard this. I know some people that are married with STDs or STIs whichever you prefer. Why do you think they have all those herpes commercials on tv for valtrex with the man saying “I still have herpes” and the woman saying “I still don’t”
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I don’t think we are supposed to be assuming that those two are married to each other. 😉
 
whiteknite said:
If a man or woman has for example :- Warts on his/her hands and dont treat them and use the loo for example.
Then chances are they get warts on there genatals, you understand as some people dont check often these things.
they tend to get passed on and if they do check but inside of marriage decide to have sex and cant wait then im sure useing
Artificial birth control might help.
I seen this on a medical program on channel 4 through the week and it made sense ]
And for instance you have a blood transfusion and find you have aids but find the need for sex with your legaly married partner, Then protection would therefore be needed…
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Those situations are incredibly rare, though. I also don’t think you can get genital warts from lack of handwashing, although it might be a good rumor to spread around a school, and see whether the kids start washing their hands. 😃
 
jmcrae said:
Those situations are incredibly rare, though. I also don’t think you can get genital warts from lack of handwashing, although it might be a good rumor to spread around a school, and see whether the kids start washing their hands. 😃
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I never said from lack of hand washing i ment checking as you wash.😛
 
Carolinagirl411 said:
Confession is way to anxiety producing for me. I get sick before I go and sick afterwards. Physically ill. It is not a wonderful experience like all of you claim it to be. Not for me. Maybe it is due to my anxiety disorder…I don’t know. …

(skip)

I don’t understand how people can go once a week b/c what in the world do you talk about!!! My priest always seems bored if I don’t talk about a mortal sin…and therefore I see no point in me being there. .
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Believe me I understand how you feel. Confession was torture for me too. In fact, I simply could not go for a very long period of time…

May I make a suggestion: find a priest you can trust and ask him to be your spiritual director. If there is an Abbey in your area, you will find that many of the monks are available for spiritual direction. The spiritual director will see you as often as he or you feel necessary and will help you with your fear of confession. He will not act “bored” because he will be in the process of helping you come closer to God.

All he will ask of you is that you trust God and to believe that the Spirit is working in you.

Spiritual direction has helped me immensely and I now no longer have fear of confession. I am also coming closer to God and see the Spirit at work in my life. I am very grateful for the spiritual direction I have received.

I had never thought of asking for direction. I always thought spiritual direction was for those who are contemplating the priesthood or religious life; not for an ordinary individual like me.
 
I go to Confession when my heart strings are being pulled that is my cue to go.

But in a time frame I usually go 2 -3 weeks, after awhile I might have to go all the time.

🙂
 
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