L
Lady_Love
Guest
I was meditating today on becoming a marathon runner. I was overwhelmed by running 20 miles when I can barely walk three miles. In my mind I started comparing marathon running to spirituality. I thought, “How silly it would be to study hours and hours about marathon running to try to be a marathon runner,” The only way to become a marathon runner would be to START running. I’m sure some studying would be good for learning to eat, train, and rest for marathon running but someday in order to compete you would have to start running.
I say this because I have caught myself in the vicious cycle of study when it comes to the spiritual life. I could spend days reading. But what kind of life is a life spent reading and learning about how others lived, if I don’t live my own life. I would read and read about who this saint was and who that saint was but often not even know who I was. I could look and admire all the gifts and talents of someone but never know what my gifts were. The problem with not knowing what my gifts/talents were is that I wasn’t using them.
I was reading a book (ha. ha.) the other day that was talking about how our gifts and talents reveal our purpose. For example, my talent is singing, so I sing for my parish. I started as a meek member of a choir, then graduated to a cantor, and now ten years later, I am the primary cantor for funerals and weddings, I am engaged to the music director for the parish (whom I got to return to church before we were dating and work for the church.) and we are on the diocesan board for “World Mission Day.” 2013" together.
I started with my voice, which I wasn’t very strong in at the time, and grew from there. The point being is…I STARTED.
I’m not trying to toot my own horn here because actually, I have found myself caught in the vicious circle of study, study, study and not enough action. I was just observing myself and wondering if I was avoiding responsibility by diving into study. You know, like when we talk ABOUT Jesus yet never talk TO Him. Have you ever found your self doing that? I know I have been standing right in front of Him in the Eucharist, talking about how He is present there without ever addressing Him personally…such a shame.
I say this because I have caught myself in the vicious cycle of study when it comes to the spiritual life. I could spend days reading. But what kind of life is a life spent reading and learning about how others lived, if I don’t live my own life. I would read and read about who this saint was and who that saint was but often not even know who I was. I could look and admire all the gifts and talents of someone but never know what my gifts were. The problem with not knowing what my gifts/talents were is that I wasn’t using them.
I was reading a book (ha. ha.) the other day that was talking about how our gifts and talents reveal our purpose. For example, my talent is singing, so I sing for my parish. I started as a meek member of a choir, then graduated to a cantor, and now ten years later, I am the primary cantor for funerals and weddings, I am engaged to the music director for the parish (whom I got to return to church before we were dating and work for the church.) and we are on the diocesan board for “World Mission Day.” 2013" together.
I started with my voice, which I wasn’t very strong in at the time, and grew from there. The point being is…I STARTED.
I’m not trying to toot my own horn here because actually, I have found myself caught in the vicious circle of study, study, study and not enough action. I was just observing myself and wondering if I was avoiding responsibility by diving into study. You know, like when we talk ABOUT Jesus yet never talk TO Him. Have you ever found your self doing that? I know I have been standing right in front of Him in the Eucharist, talking about how He is present there without ever addressing Him personally…such a shame.