How to meet single Catholics

[LukeFive]

Logically speaking (aka expect a doomsworth of hairsplitting), isn’t a big hug more intimate than a kiss on the cheek? Now suffer migraine!

Strange thing, it seems to fluctuate here. Some time you do that, some time you don’t. It was new to me in highschool and rather popular then, but largely disappeared before university. Or maybe I simply stopped never missing an opportunity.

Yes it totally is. Now this is getting way off topic, but since we are already there… I tend to give lopsided one armed hugs because they are less “intimate”. Sometime I will add a light kiss on the top of the head (this works real well right now with a head that is about as high as the top of my shoulder ). But anyway, to me, a tight front to front hug where you can feel all of the contours of the body, just can have problematic aspects to it. I am not saying that hugging is wrong by any stretch of the imagination, I am just saying that depending on the circumstances, there may be better alternatives.

 

[Belgarion]

Yes it totally is. Now this is getting way off topic, but since we are already there… I tend to give lopsided one armed hugs because they are less “intimate”. Sometime I will add a light kiss on the top of the head (this works real well right now with a head that is about as high as the top of my shoulder ). But anyway, to me, **a tight front to front hug where you can feel all of the contours of the body, just can have problematic aspects to it. ** I am not saying that hugging is wrong by any stretch of the imagination, I am just saying that depending on the circumstances, there may be better alternatives.

…I never even notice anything like that…

Anyways, I’m not stranger to those one arm hugs…One particular girl (you know the one) seems to prefer those, probably due to rule issues…Though I’ve definitely hugged her the normal way

 

[chevalier]

…aw crud…c’mon! Kissing is totally different!
Hugs weren’t casual for me at one point though…But after then all these girls kept hugging me…so it became a casual thing

Hmm… I’m rather hands-offish normally and a peck on the cheek seems less intrusive and, well, less contact, than hugging. I hug some of those I kiss on the cheek but I can’t think of anyone I’d hug but not kiss on the cheek.

I have no idea…For me, its never been present…
but those two times I kissed on the cheek, it was (or was trying to be) a romantic thing…Ok…the first one doesn’t count…I was like 8 or 9…

I see. Here it’s not romantic in the sense of a relationship but maybe romantic in the loose sense of say, getting someone flowers or telling a compliment, this kind of thing. You don’t normally see guys doing it, after all, but then, women do it with women (and in fact men sometimes too, but that’s mostly blood relations with a generation gap), so…

Definitely!!
I wasn’t talkin’ about marrying a crowd of single women…I mean…I’m not “The bachelor” or something…finding a crowd of women in wedding dresses… :bigyikes:

Err… You need to give an icy coke to your internal Salvador Dali.

Yes it totally is. Now this is getting way off topic, but since we are already there… I tend to give lopsided one armed hugs because they are less “intimate”. Sometime I will add a light kiss on the top of the head (this works real well right now with a head that is about as high as the top of my shoulder ). But anyway, to me, a tight front to front hug where you can feel all of the contours of the body, just can have problematic aspects to it. I am not saying that hugging is wrong by any stretch of the imagination, I am just saying that depending on the circumstances, there may be better alternatives.

Yeah.

…I never even notice anything like that…

Anyways, I’m not stranger to those one arm hugs…One particular girl (you know the one) seems to prefer those, probably due to rule issues…Though I’ve definitely hugged her the normal way

If you meditate too much on it, it loses charm. Try to be natural. Don’t have to be primordial to be natural, just as a reservation.

 

[Belgarion]

Hmm… I’m rather hands-offish normally and a peck on the cheek seems less intrusive and, well, less contact, than hugging. I hug some of those I kiss on the cheek but I can’t think of anyone I’d hug but not kiss on the cheek.

You see, I couldn’t do that! Kiss that way…I’m just weird I guess…

I see. Here it’s not romantic in the sense of a relationship but maybe romantic in the loose sense of say, getting someone flowers or telling a compliment, this kind of thing. You don’t normally see guys doing it, after all, but then, women do it with women (and in fact men sometimes too, but that’s mostly blood relations with a generation gap), so…

Again…weird… have no idea! lol

Err… You need to give an icy coke to your internal Salvador Dali.

…What?!?

If you meditate too much on it, it loses charm. Try to be natural. Don’t have to be primordial to be natural, just as a reservation.

I see. I am pretty reserved with my hugs…I mean, I give good hugs…but its not like I get really CLOSE…

 

[lenni]

Definitely!!
I wasn’t talkin’ about marrying a crowd of single women…I mean…I’m not “The bachelor” or something…finding a crowd of women in wedding dresses… :bigyikes:

ooooo…little do we know…
lolz…
im soz, i must be really annoying you now with my comments, belgarion…lolz…
ok…well, with the hugging thing. for me, my friends and I use to hug instead of kiss on the cheek when we greeted each other in about 10th grade. but now, we just peck on the cheek.
but i must admit…some of the guys (coz most of them were catholic) would give sort of half hearted hugs. which was fine…i didnt really care. but yeah, i think a hug is ok when its like a 10-second thing.
however, iv made mistakes myself with intimate hugs so lasting more than 2mins (yes, wif this pervert of a guy as and he is extremely desperate, and i should have known better to push him away but yeah, heat of the moment)
so i think if your gonna hug to greet, it cant be prolonged, or a peck on the cheek is always cool…

 

[ack]

Hehe, but you just said that hugs weren’t casual for you until a bunch of girls started hugging you all the time.

The same thing might happen with the kisses some day.

In “white America”, it would be unusual for unrelated people to kiss unless they’re romantically involved. But things are different in other countries, and in other ethnic groups in America.

You see, I couldn’t do that! Kiss that way…I’m just weird I guess…

 

[Belgarion]

Hehe, but you just said that hugs weren’t casual for you until a bunch of girls started hugging you all the time.

The same thing might happen with the kisses some day.

In “white America”, it would be unusual for unrelated people to kiss unless they’re romantically involved. But things are different in other countries, and in other ethnic groups in America.

I don’t believe girls are going to just start kissing me on the cheek… LOL

lenni:

ooooo…little do we know…
lolz…
im soz, i must be really annoying you now with my comments, belgarion…lolz…
ok…well, with the hugging thing. for me, my friends and I use to hug instead of kiss on the cheek when we greeted each other in about 10th grade. but now, we just peck on the cheek.
but i must admit…some of the guys (coz most of them were catholic) would give sort of half hearted hugs. which was fine…i didnt really care. but yeah, i think a hug is ok when its like a 10-second thing.
however, iv made mistakes myself with intimate hugs so lasting more than 2mins (yes, wif this pervert of a guy as and he is extremely desperate, and i should have known better to push him away but yeah, heat of the moment)
so i think if your gonna hug to greet, it cant be prolonged, or a peck on the cheek is always cool

2 minutes??..whew…

I danced with a girl, staring deep into her eyes while she did the same…THAT was a heat of the moment thing…and we never saw each other again! lol

 

[lenni]

I don’t believe girls are going to just start kissing me on the cheek… LOL

2 minutes??..whew…

I danced with a girl, staring deep into her eyes while she did the same…THAT was a heat of the moment thing…and we never saw each other again! lol

mmm…how does that work…
o wait…i get it…like you were slow dancing…haha…
i get it…
i think slow dancing is fine… i mean there is nothing wrong with it unless your literally hugging and slow dancing. but i dont agree with grinding and stuff.
man…we are sooooooooo offf the topic…lolz
i dont know how it even relates to meeting single catholics. or unless its like - what not to do!lolz…

 

[Cliff_Jumper]

no worries, seeing this helps me to know what not to do around women

 

[chevalier]

You see, I couldn’t do that! Kiss that way…I’m just weird I guess…

Well, the first experience of that felt a bit as a kind of chivalry romance. It was like kissing on the hand, but with some special favour from the lady. After a while one wouldn’t generally think of that that way but it would simply become a habit that one doesn’t spend time thinking about.

Again…weird… have no idea! lol

Hmm…

…What?!?

You were losing touch with grim old reality.

I see. I am pretty reserved with my hugs…I mean, I give good hugs…but its not like I get really CLOSE…

Well, that’d be expectable. Myself I’m rather reserved but sometimes in some circumstances I open really fast with some people. But with some people I have some instinct connection and with some I don’t.

 

[chevalier]

I don’t believe girls are going to just start kissing me on the cheek… LOL

2 minutes??..whew…

I danced with a girl, staring deep into her eyes while she did the same…THAT was a heat of the moment thing…and we never saw each other again! lol

That could well have been more intimate than a quick cheek peck. Personally, I don’t feel comfortable doing that, well… unless the girl appeals to me, but then I’d need a bit more than that to be comfortable with it. I’m generally not a fan of the mushy effect of music, even though I’m not immune to it, nor do I always find it particularly worthy of rejection in a given moment… Well, guess one needs to meet people somehow. I’d still rather meet them in academic circumstances, or at least professional or social ones.

 

[Belgarion]

Well, the first experience of that felt a bit as a kind of chivalry romance. It was like kissing on the hand, but with some special favour from the lady. After a while one wouldn’t generally think of that that way but it would simply become a habit that one doesn’t spend time thinking about.

I dunno…I kinda like have my kisses actually mean something

You were losing touch with grim old reality.

oh… That’s not good…

Well, that’d be expectable. Myself I’m rather reserved but sometimes in some circumstances I open really fast with some people. But with some people I have some instinct connection and with some I don’t.

I see what you mean. I’ve done that before. Don’t understand it.

Though usually the girls I like, I don’t have as much physical contact with. I don’t hug them as often, etc

 

[Belgarion]

That could well have been more intimate than a quick cheek peck. Personally, I don’t feel comfortable doing that, well… unless the girl appeals to me, but then I’d need a bit more than that to be comfortable with it. I’m generally not a fan of the mushy effect of music, even though I’m not immune to it, nor do I always find it particularly worthy of rejection in a given moment… Well, guess one needs to meet people somehow. I’d still rather meet them in academic circumstances, or at least professional or social ones.

I would say it was more of a mental thing for me.

She was a good-looking young woman, and girls like that never payed attention to me before. It was a new experience for me, and I just went along with it. No kissing, nothing like that. Just the dancing and staring. I don’t regret it or anything, and I’m glad. I did nothing TO regret!

 

[lenni]

No kissing, nothing like that. Just the dancing and staring. I don’t regret it or anything, and I’m glad. I did nothing TO regret!

mmmmmmm…that is sure interesting.
for me, i would find it rather awkward to slow dance while staring deeply into another person’s eyes. lolz…no offense or anything belgarion. especially if i just met them or they were an acquaintance.
i think the dude would have to be a good mate of mine, so that i could waltz with him.
i would still vote - kiss on the cheek - if i were to weigh both options.
btw - going back to a kiss on the cheek for greeting - it doesnt have to be romantic. i mean, majority of the time, it isnt when among family or friends. like in some countries it’s custom to kiss one side. while in others both sides or even kiss 3 times.
but for me - among friends its usually 1 but with family - 2 sides.

 

[chevalier]

I dunno…I kinda like have my kisses actually mean something

Yes. My friendly ones have a lot of meaning. Different meaning from those relationship ones. More in the sister area.

I see what you mean. I’ve done that before. Don’t understand it.

Though usually the girls I like, I don’t have as much physical contact with. I don’t hug them as often, etc

I’m a fan of the not so physical interaction. Cutting physical contact generally allows you to focus on the subject.

 

[Belgarion]

Yes. My friendly ones have a lot of meaning. Different meaning from those relationship ones. More in the sister area.

lol! Well I must simply be weird!

I’m a fan of the not so physical interaction. Cutting physical contact generally allows you to focus on the subject.

True. Though for me its just because I am extremely shy…lol

 

[chevalier]

I would say it was more of a mental thing for me.

She was a good-looking young woman, and girls like that never payed attention to me before. It was a new experience for me, and I just went along with it. No kissing, nothing like that. Just the dancing and staring. I don’t regret it or anything, and I’m glad. I did nothing TO regret!

You know I could prove you did, right? Just kidding, I won’t. I have some such stories I sometimes look kindly on, although it’s mostly a bittersweet, half-sad thing, looking at what could possibly have developed, had anything actually developed out of it. In most cases nothing would have anyway, but you never really know. You know, I still fondly remember that sporty girl, pretty like there’s no tomorrow, whose name I barely knew and with whom I still made some 30 kilometres through sand and wind. Realistically speaking, it’s likely she actually had some chosen guy, or perhaps for some other reason nothing would ever have happened further between her and me, but as much as I knew her for a total of two days, it took two years to start forgetting. And yes, there was some physical contact because the wind was very heavy, the cold was debilitating and some whipping rain started, so the way back I had my arm round her to keep her going and safe. Shame to whom thinks ill of it.

mmmmmmm…that is sure interesting.
for me, i would find it rather awkward to slow dance while staring deeply into another person’s eyes. lolz…no offense or anything belgarion. especially if i just met them or they were an acquaintance.

Yes, Lenni, I agree, but Belgarion was being innocent and it was a new experience to him. There’s a lot of appeal in the way people seem now suddenly so close to each other when music plays and slow-dancing starts. After a while, people generally see it differently. While I was at some point a fan of it, and wasn’t as innocent as Belgarion was, after a bit of reflection, I wouldn’t generally slow-dance with a stranger and no close holds for me either. And then I loosened up because I simply stopped caring. I decided it wasn’t an ethical Thermopylae. Right now I find slow-dancing with strangers rather odd, though if the girl were pretty or nice and I had a couple of cups of wine in my belly, I’d probably decide you lived only once.

True. Though for me its just because I am extremely shy…lol

Ever watched House MD? Now simply think House JD.

 

[Belgarion]

You know I could prove you did, right? Just kidding, I won’t. I have some such stories I sometimes look kindly on, although it’s mostly a bittersweet, half-sad thing, looking at what could possibly have developed, had anything actually developed out of it. In most cases nothing would have anyway, but you never really know. You know, I still fondly remember that sporty girl, pretty like there’s no tomorrow, whose name I barely knew and with whom I still made some 30 kilometres through sand and wind. Realistically speaking, it’s likely she actually had some chosen guy, or perhaps for some other reason nothing would ever have happened further between her and me, but as much as I knew her for a total of two days, it took two years to start forgetting. And yes, there was some physical contact because the wind was very heavy, the cold was debilitating and some whipping rain started, so the way back I had my arm round her to keep her going and safe. Shame to whom thinks ill of it.

hey hey hey!
W00t! Chev’s got some moves!

I see what you mean, though! I just met that girl at a dance, and it was a party between friends and family. It did take me a while to forget, but I was never really saddened by learning that she JUST got a boyfriend. lol

Yes, Lenni, I agree, but Belgarion was being innocent and it was a new experience to him. There’s a lot of appeal in the way people seem now suddenly so close to each other when music plays and slow-dancing starts. After a while, people generally see it differently. While I was at some point a fan of it, and wasn’t as innocent as Belgarion was, after a bit of reflection, I wouldn’t generally slow-dance with a stranger and no close holds for me either. And then I loosened up because I simply stopped caring. I decided it wasn’t an ethical Thermopylae. Right now I find slow-dancing with strangers rather odd, though if the girl were pretty or nice and I had a couple of cups of wine in my belly, I’d probably decide you lived only once.

I’m still here

Ever watched House MD? Now simply think House JD.

er…what?

I LOVE house…but JD? LOL

 

[chevalier]

hey hey hey!
W00t! Chev’s got some moves!

Erm. I have more. I could tell and tell. However, I’m not really as proud of that as I used to be and in this particular instance, I will insist it wasn’t a romantic move, although some such thoughts did cross my mind. A beautiful memory. I guess as long as I’m single, I can cherish it when it comes back. Pity I’ll never likely meet the girl again, though.

I see what you mean, though! I just met that girl at a dance, and it was a party between friends and family. It did take me a while to forget, but I was never really saddened by learning that she JUST got a boyfriend. lol

Such things happen. A poster has recently opened a thread about a situation in which the girl met at a dancing turned out to be married.

I’m still here

What were you saying, Lenni?

er…what?

I LOVE house…but JD? LOL

Strictly speaking, I have a Master of Laws degree, which does not compare well to American ones, but the superimposition was just too funny.

 

[lenni]

Yes, Lenni, I agree, but Belgarion was being innocent and it was a new experience to him. There’s a lot of appeal in the way people seem now suddenly so close to each other when music plays and slow-dancing starts. After a while, people generally see it differently. While I was at some point a fan of it, and wasn’t as innocent as Belgarion was, after a bit of reflection, I wouldn’t generally slow-dance with a stranger and no close holds for me either. And then I loosened up because I simply stopped caring. I decided it wasn’t an ethical Thermopylae. Right now I find slow-dancing with strangers rather odd, though if the girl were pretty or nice and I had a couple of cups of wine in my belly, I’d probably decide you lived only once.

Ever watched House MD? Now simply think House JD.

hold up! i dont have such a problem with slow dancing.I always thought it to be innocent and i dont think its wrong - i just dont like it when slow dancing becomes more of a swaying hug or if the dudes hands are not where there supposed to be.
lolz…anyways, i havent seen people slow dance in years. i mean, the music which comes outta clubs are not usually material for slow dancing. (gee…so which day and age do u guys live in???..lolz, jks)
well, i love salsa…if thats sorta considered slow dance when it isnt to sensual. lolz, but then again, not many guys/girls actually know how to move.