How to respond to a religiously active person with a same sex spouse / partner

[Thorolfr]

Thorolfr:

There are way too many other more important issues in life to be worried about than what pronoun someone wants to be addressed with.

Shouldn’t that go both ways?

If I address you in the way that you want to be addressed and you address me in the way that I want to be addressed, what other way do you have in mind with respect to this issue?

 

[JulianN]

Absolutely. If someone is refusing to call you by the gender you’ve stated you prefer, but insisting you call them the gender they prefer, you should complain to management.

 

[Loud-living-dogma]

I had a similar thing in my workplace when there was a “winter holiday” decorating contest announced for our non-public desks or work area. No religious themes or elements allowed, of course! I felt the chilling effect of that, and took down my couple of holy cards that I had discreetly displayed, and took down all my other personal pictures etc. since I didn’t want my supervisors creeping around my desk, looking at my stuff under the guise of judging the winter holiday contest.
Yes, I realize that I sound paranoid.

 

[SnowRose]

I don’t get it.
Unless you work in a religious environment of your own faith, you tone down your religious paraphernalia. The same way you tone down your political opinions or football fanatism and so on. For the very reason that you were hired to do a job, not proselytize, and that includes getting along politely with your workmates.

 

[Loud-living-dogma]

Yes I agree. I toned it down by taking down my two discreetly displayed holy cards. Not that my coworkers tone down their criticism of the Catholic Church: “the Catholic Church is evil!”. “Why would anyone even be Catholic!” These were both said in a staff meeting. I can imagine what the reaction might have been if that had been said of other religions. Nor they tone down their atheism and political talk. I never express my political opinions or religious thoughts, but others have plenty to say about “Stone Age religions”.

 

[theCardinalbird]

Not that my coworkers tone down their criticism of the Catholic Church: “the Catholic Church is evil!”. “Why would anyone even be Catholic!” These were both said in a staff meeting. I can imagine what the reaction might have been if that had been said of other religions. Nor they tone down their atheism and political talk. I never express my political opinions or religious thoughts, but others have plenty to say about “Stone Age religions”.

I believe there is a quote for this by historian Philip Jenkins:

[A] statement that could be regarded as misogynistic, anti-Semitic, or homophobic would haunt a speaker for years, and could conceivably destroy a public career. Yet there is one massive exception to this rule, namely, that it is still possible to make quite remarkably hostile or vituperative public statements about one major religious tradition, namely, Roman Catholicism, and those comments will do no harm to the speaker’s reputation.

 

[SnowRose]

It’s not just RCC.
You should hear what’s being said about Evangelicals and Pentecoastals, and sometimes to their faces. ”Have you taken your meds today?” is about par for the course.