Hubby messaging another woman. I need advice please!

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Yes–I agree with the above poster’s advice…! Insert my advice only if he is involved with what it appears like. (I will keep you in my prayers!)
 
I agree that you need to hear the rest of the story before you get too upset. At least 2-3 times a week I get emails from total strangers, who say they have seen my picture or something. I just delete these and don’t even think twice about them. I don’t have a myspace site, so these kind of things do happen. Please get the whole story before you get too upset.
 
Light_Seeker said:
Because it appears legit does necessarily mean it is. Its very very easy to spoof this. Happens all the time. Matter of fact, I get at least half a dozen or more emails every month from what appears to be PayPal or my bank, saying theres a problem with my account, please log in using the attached link. Right. Appears totally legit. Trace the IP address and domain servers, its coming from North Korea or some 3rd world country, along with all the attached links that look totally legit.

Before you jump to conclusions, hear him out.
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He did send her that, and the phone number is real. He left me a voicemail saying he wants to talk to me about what he sent her. I’m working so I cannot deal with this right now on the phone. My office is pretty crowded and wouldn’t want the entire office finding this out.
 
“Lucy, you got some splaining to do!”
- Ricky Ricardo

messaging other women & having a myspace page shows a certain lack of maturity and definitely a lack of better judgment. Step 1 - take a deep breath. Step 2 - Let him talk. Step 3 - Listen. Step 4 - Repeat as necessary.
 
Wow. He’s saying, “I’m happily married but like to hang out with sexy girls as long as my wife doesn’t know about it. Here’s my number so we can get hooked up.” So I can see why you’re upset. Especially since the very next step is to sleep with the girls he pals with - as long as his wife doesn’t know about it.

Likely the girl on myspace wants to meet an eligible man, not a married one, and she is insulted with an unavailable man is coming on to her. And her contacting you is doing what she’d want someone to do for her.

I think you are entittled to react and proccess this revelation about your husband in whatever way seems right to you. I would NOT be happy about what he said to her. You have a right to expect your marraige to be completely exclusive. Its normal to be very mad right now.

Gregory Popcak at www.exceptionalmarriages.com would have wise advise about what to do at this point.
 
Eliza10 said:
Wow. He’s saying, “I’m happily married but like to hang out with sexy girls as long as my wife doesn’t know about it. Here’s my number so we can get hooked up.” So I can see why you’re upset. Especially since the very next step is to sleep with the girls he pals with - as long as his wife doesn’t know about it.

Likely the girl on myspace wants to meet an eligible man, not a married one, and she is insulted with an unavailable man is coming on to her. And her contacting you is doing what she’d want someone to do for her.

I think you are entittled to react and proccess this revelation about your husband in whatever way seems right to you. I would NOT be happy about what he said to her. You have a right to expect your marraige to be completely exclusive. Its normal to be very mad right now.

Gregory Popcak at www.exceptionalmarriages.com would have wise advise about what to do at this point.
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Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think you read the message wrong. The girl sent him the message with the number and he answered back telling her she’s sexy and that he might call her. I think the OP is upset at the fact he is even considering calling her and saying she’s sexy.
 
Hey,

I am sorry that you are going through this, but I think your husband made the right decision. It is a shame that some women and men don’t respect the meaning of marriage. You should cool off before you face him, and think things through. You should talk to him about this. Listen to him and his side, as well he needs to listen to you. I hope that everything works out.

God Bless,

Gladys

:harp:
 
yessisan said:
Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think you read the message wrong. The girl sent him the message with the number and he answered back telling her she’s sexy and that he might call her. I think the OP is upset at the fact he is even considering calling her and saying she’s sexy.
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Possibly! It looked to me as if the husband gave her his own phone number.
 
Has anyone considered that maybe ruining marriages is a hobby for this gal? Clearly this lady is out to start trouble. I bet the pictures she sent is not even of herself. Bet ya!😃
 
Eliza10 said:
Wow. He’s saying, “I’m happily married but like to hang out with sexy girls as long as my wife doesn’t know about it. Here’s my number so we can get hooked up.” So I can see why you’re upset. Especially since the very next step is to sleep with the girls he pals with - as long as his wife doesn’t know about it.

Likely the girl on myspace wants to meet an eligible man, not a married one, and she is insulted with an unavailable man is coming on to her. And her contacting you is doing what she’d want someone to do for her.

I think you are entittled to react and proccess this revelation about your husband in whatever way seems right to you. I would NOT be happy about what he said to her. You have a right to expect your marraige to be completely exclusive. Its normal to be very mad right now.

Gregory Popcak at www.exceptionalmarriages.com would have wise advise about what to do at this point.
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yessisan said:
Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think you read the message wrong. The girl sent him the message with the number and he answered back telling her she’s sexy and that he might call her. I think the OP is upset at the fact he is even considering calling her and saying she’s sexy.
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Eliza10 said:
Possibly! It looked to me as if the husband gave her his own phone number.
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It appears to me that this is a typical email exchange. The original message is below the response.

If you look carefully at the message, the paragraph at the bottom, the one with the phone number, is clearly directed toward the husband. The husband did respond saying they she was going to block her account, but he was also trying to be polite about it. Seems a bit odd, but some people treat everyone with kid gloves.

I think he was trying to keep a safe distance and rejected this woman’s obvious advances. I think that rejection was the motivation for the woman sending the exchange to the wife. Otherwise, why would the woman contact the wife to begin with? She was just a selfish woman who decided she was going to play home-wrecker.

There are a lot of sick people on the internet. I can personally attest to this after meeting some women online. And that was through a Catholic singles site!
 
kage_ar said:
From the way it looks here, your husband got a provocative picture from some woman and message in answer to his my space page. He responded and the woman decided to try to stir the pot by forwarding you the message.

It could all be fake, or it could be edited, or your husband might have replied.

My best advice… happily married grown ups do not need my space pages, delete both his and yours.
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Grown-ups with teenage daughters most certainly do need MySpace pages. Its the only way to keep in touch with them in a way they understand.
 
To answer a few things: a woman contacted my husband. I got another message from her telling me that if I would’ve been woman enough he wouldn’t have to look for something outside of home. :mad: 😦 She also told me to tell him he has a nice voice :mad: I hadn’t spoken to my hubby since the first message i received early this morning, and guess what? He’s avoiding coming home!!

He deleted his myspace account, and where he works there are no computers. He’s in construction so he went somewhere to check his messages. It’s 2 hours after getting off work and he hasn’t arrived at home. Do you guys want to know how stupid he thinks I am? He told me before I told him I knew he deleted his account, that he got a flat tire and that’s why he hasn’t gotten here yet. Well, he could’ve called me to let me know, but no! He decides to go to someone’s house to check his messages. I forwarded the messages from her so now he doesn’t want to come home and face me!! I cannot believe he’s such a coward!!!

Why hide if you did nothing wrong???
 
foxc1 said:
To answer a few things: a woman contacted my husband. I got another message from her telling me that if I would’ve been woman enough he wouldn’t have to look for something outside of home. :mad: 😦 She also told me to tell him he has a nice voice :mad: I hadn’t spoken to my hubby since the first message i received early this morning, and guess what? He’s avoiding coming home!!

He deleted his myspace account, and where he works there are no computers. He’s in construction so he went somewhere to check his messages. It’s 2 hours after getting off work and he hasn’t arrived at home. Do you guys want to know how stupid he thinks I am? He told me before I told him I knew he deleted his account, that he got a flat tire and that’s why he hasn’t gotten here yet. Well, he could’ve called me to let me know, but no! He decides to go to someone’s house to check his messages. I forwarded the messages from her so now he doesn’t want to come home and face me!! I cannot believe he’s such a coward!!!

Why hide if you did nothing wrong???
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The short answer: You don’t.
 
Foxc1,
I’m so sorry this is happening. I’ve been praying that God grant you the graces to persevere through this trial. I don’t have any words of advice other than to let you know that I will continue to pray for you. God Bless you and keep you in His embrace.

Jesus I Trust in You. Jesus I Trust in You. Jesus I Trust in You.
 
Thanks for all the replies. I cannot believe he is being such a coward. If he did nothing wrong, I don’t know why he’s hiding from me. I don’t know how to handle the situation when he gets home. He said on his last lame phone call - the one about the flat tire - that he was at his friend’s and as soon as they were done “fixing” the tire he’d head back home.

If this had actually happened, he has those green gooey bottled things that clog holes in tires or he could have called me to pick him up. We have a huge Ram truck and we have towing service on our car insurance.

I cannot believe he’d go about it and lie to me this way.:crying:
 
It’s like Watergate – the cover-up is getting him into much worse trouble than the underlying offense would have.
 
Maybe, just maybe, he realized that having a myspace account is dumb d-u-m-b and he wanted to get rid of it before any more harm came to you. Maybe he realizes that you are hurt, and deleting the page is the first thing that came to his mind. Maybe he even called his Priest and said “Father, what should I do”?

Maybe he realized that this was a big oozing sewer line and he just wanted it repaired ASAP.

Call him, tell him thank you for deleting the page and that you have also deleted yours. Then, call your Priest for a sit down session to work on trust in your marriage.
 
kage_ar said:
Maybe, just maybe, he realized that having a myspace account is dumb d-u-m-b and he wanted to get rid of it before any more harm came to you. Maybe he realizes that you are hurt, and deleting the page is the first thing that came to his mind. Maybe he even called his Priest and said “Father, what should I do”?

Maybe he realized that this was a big oozing sewer line and he just wanted it repaired ASAP.

Call him, tell him thank you for deleting the page and that you have also deleted yours. Then, call your Priest for a sit down session to work on trust in your marriage.
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He’s not Catholic, he’s a non-denom Christian, so he wouldn’t talk to a priest. I might just call my priest to talk to him myself.

It’s been 3 hrs since he got off work and he’s not home yet. 😦

What if he deleted the myspace account to hide what he and that woman were talking about?
 
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