Hubby vent

[masondoggy]

Actually, his behavior is controlling, insecure, and since you are growing resentful (not healthy to your marriage). You may have to do it gently but you DO have rights. You should be able to pursue your own interests, etc. I just cannot imagine.

I have my father living with me and if I had to sit and watch CSI and SCI FI channel all night I would explode (instead I watch EWTN or my computer, listen to Orthodox radio, post here, study, etc). Couples need time together but also apart.

Don’t let it get to the point where you build an emotional wall up of resentment and unfullfilled wishes.

Good luck.

Rev North

I don’t really think he’s being controlling. It’s not like he tells me I *can’t *do what I want. It just irritates him. And I think his irritation really stems from the fact that I spend a lot of time on the internet in general. Which, I know is a problem. And I need to change that. But this just happens to be my only chance for social interaction. I am a sahm and DH works long hours. So, by the time he gets home, there’s no time for me to pursue a social life outside of the house. He doesn’t really get that. He goofs off with his buddies at work all day long. I don’t get to do that.

I think he has this ideal of us putting the kids in bed at night and spending “quality time” together. But the bottom line is that it usually ends up with us sitting there watching TV. I mean, we talk. But after awhile there’s nothing to talk about for the night. Or he’s in a bad mood. Or I’m in a bad mood.

I’m not really growing resentful. I just needed to vent last night. And I don’t want to give the impression that we have marital problems because we actually have a pretty good relationship. I think this is just one of those snags we’re running into that really are the result of poor communication.

 

[RevDrNorth]

I don’t really think he’s being controlling. It’s not like he tells me I *can’t *do what I want. It just irritates him. And I think his irritation really stems from the fact that I spend a lot of time on the internet in general. Which, I know is a problem. And I need to change that. But this just happens to be my only chance for social interaction. I am a sahm and DH works long hours. So, by the time he gets home, there’s no time for me to pursue a social life outside of the house. He doesn’t really get that. He goofs off with his buddies at work all day long. I don’t get to do that.

I think he has this ideal of us putting the kids in bed at night and spending “quality time” together. But the bottom line is that it usually ends up with us sitting there watching TV. I mean, we talk. But after awhile there’s nothing to talk about for the night. Or he’s in a bad mood. Or I’m in a bad mood.

I’m not really growing resentful. I just needed to vent last night. And I don’t want to give the impression that we have marital problems because we actually have a pretty good relationship. I think this is just one of those snags we’re running into that really are the result of poor communication.

I wish you the best

Rev North

 

[KCT]

Do you have friends you could trade off babysitting with- during the day? You really need to get out once in a while . Maybe that way your hubby’s behavior won’t bug you so much, because you’ll have your outlet, too. —KCT

 

[Julianna]

TV’s are cheap now…go buy one and watch what you want to watch. Have a “movie” night…go to Blockbuster and pick out a movie you both will enjoy.

My dh and dson…love action, adventure, Steven Segal type movies. I’m not interested. I go read, talk to my friends or surf the web. After 26 yrs of marriage I don’t need to be attached at the hip.

He would never dream of getting hissy fit if I said I didn’t want to watch a movie I wasn’t interested in. It wouldn’t phase me in the least.

 

[Truly_Beloved]

Is there any way you could sabotage the TV so it doesn’t work anymore? You know, with all those wires inside, just pull out a pretty colored one. Or two. Do TVs have purple wires inside? Pull a purple one!

Or accidentally drop it/push it out of the entertainment center or something?

Sorry, Mason, I know I’m not being much help. My dad is the same way as your hubby. It’s maddening for my mom, for sure!

 

[sanctareparata]

Is there any way you could sabotage the TV so it doesn’t work anymore? You know, with all those wires inside, just pull out a pretty colored one. Or two. Do TVs have purple wires inside? Pull a purple one**!**

masondoggy - I have no advice. I’m just sorry that things are the pits right now.

 

[masondoggy]

Is there any way you could sabotage the TV so it doesn’t work anymore? You know, with all those wires inside, just pull out a pretty colored one. Or two. Do TVs have purple wires inside? Pull a purple one!

Or accidentally drop it/push it out of the entertainment center or something?

Sorry, Mason, I know I’m not being much help. My dad is the same way as your hubby. It’s maddening for my mom, for sure!

LOL, well then I couldn’t watch my shows.

 

[CatholicSam]

Is there any way you could sabotage the TV so it doesn’t work anymore? You know, with all those wires inside, just pull out a pretty colored one. Or two. Do TVs have purple wires inside? Pull a purple one!
Or accidentally drop it/push it out of the entertainment center or something?

Sorry, Mason, I know I’m not being much help. My dad is the same way as your hubby. It’s maddening for my mom, for sure!

Or you could pull a red one and a blue one and that might equal pulling a purple one! I came to find out a few weeks ago that ceiling fans have purple wires. And green ones. And orange ones. And pretty much any color under the sun. I’m surprised they didn’t run out of colors for that beast!

In your situation I would be tempted to make a stink to DH when he goes out to talk on the phone when you’re watching a show. Maybe he doesn’t even realize that he’s doing to you just what makes him mad when you do it to him. Then maybe he’ll realize how unreasonable he’s being.

 

[Viki59]

I think he has this ideal of us putting the kids in bed at night and spending “quality time” together. But the bottom line is that it usually ends up with us sitting there watching TV. . .

Have you ever tried playing cards or a board game? We enjoy that sometimes, and the kids could do it too. It’s almost the only thing we do as a family except for picnicing.

 

[masondoggy]

Have you ever tried playing cards or a board game? We enjoy that sometimes, and the kids could do it too. It’s almost the only thing we do as a family except for picnicing.

Maybe we could try it. I’m not really a card/board game person (I think I have ADD,lol). But hey,. it’s worth a try.

What I really wish we could do is read scripture or pray together but I haven’t got up the guts to ask him yet. Due to his hostility toward the Catholic religion when we met, I’ve always just avoided the whole issue with him. I really gotta stop doing that.