Your last statement is indeed correct. I don’t know where else to go, but the Church is not meeting my needs and the needs of my family.
But then again, I look at the world and see millions in need, so why would God address my needs before the needs of the others? Hence the abandonment feeling.
From your standpoint, what is the crisis in the Church and what are the needs of your family that are not being met? What are the needs of the Church have you identified as being your duty to meet, and what are you doing as a family to accomplish that service?
God is probably not going to reach down and pluck you out personally, no. In the economy of grace, usually the rescue of the helpless accomplishes the edification of the rescuer, so that there may be doubled grace. If you are praying to God as the flood waters rise, it will do you well to remind yourself what a rescue boat looks like, and ask yourself whether or not you have a boat in your own garage that could rescue both you and your neighbor. If so, there is the answer to both your prayer and your neighbor’s!
For instance, if you believe the crisis in the Church is that there are not enough priests, are you praying for vocations? Are you raising your children in a way typical of someone who will grow up to answer a religious vocation? Where are these priests going to come from, if not from the families of those who see a need?
If you believe the main crisis in the Church is the way it gave sexual predators an ideal place to prey upon the faithful because the Church feared bad press or did not understand the nature of pedophilia as a durable habit of mind and heart, then take heart. Much is being done to address these problems. It is unspeakably sad that it had to happen this way, but at least the Church’s failures are making the public realize that the way to prevent the sexual abuse of children is to realize that sexual predators do not always look creepy any more than a thief always looks unreliable. The world is a safer place for children, both inside the Church and outside of it, because of how these scandals are finally being addressed. The work is ongoing, but it is well under way.
If you believe the Church is in crisis because the faith is not well-understood, what have you done to pursue the continuing adult education that the Church offers? Have you gone after what you desire, or do you expect someone to come and serve it to you? Or is the crisis because you feel you are hearing too many different opinions and do not know what to believe? If that is so, please know that the catechism and all the major documents are available online, at the Vatican’s own website. This ministry also exists to help you sort out the wheat from the chaff with regards to what is true teaching. If you want to find true teaching, you can find it.
I will warn you of this much: If you think the Church is in crisis because it will not change its teachings on sexual morality, on the ordination of women, on divorce, and on the other issues that some other Christian denominations are rushing to change, then of that kind of change the Church rightly says, “Heaven forbid it.” Do not wait around for that kind of change to happen, and I pray you, do not hope for it! If the Church has a crisis, it is the number of Catholics who want that kind of change.
I remember a story related by a priest who went to a seminar given by another priest who was on the faculty at a “progressive” seminary, in which the speaker claimed to be offering “new insights” into the faith. As he left, another priest turned to him and made a remark in this fashion: “He calls them new insights, but he doesn’t know his history. They were all old ideas and some were old heresies.” The seminary was subsequently closed.
As for the OP, couples choosing Josephite marriages have traditionally been in close contact with their pastor or spiritual advisor about it, because of the difficulty of keeping the resolve and keeping the couple on the same page about what they’re choosing. That is the way to go.
