I’m feeling lost in my life

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Toi_nhan_31

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I am physically, emotionally and spiritually experiencing many problems at this moment.
Never been so bad as it is right now.
I‘ve been coping with many health problems, with depression, spiritual dryness, insecurity and doubts about my life’s vocation.
I feel like I’m losing control of my own life. I’m always in pain and I can’t find reason to enjoy life.
What can i do to restart again living my life as I should?
What can I do to get stronger physically, emotionally and spiritually?
 
Pray.

Eternal God, in whom mercy is endless, and the treasury of compassion inexhaustible,
look kindly upon us, and increase your mercy in us,
that in difficult moments, we might not despair nor become despondent,
but with great confidence, submit ourselves to your holy will,
which is love and Mercy itself.
Amen.
 
Hello Toi. I’m sorry to hear about the struggles. I’ll pray for you as well.

Could you give us a little more information? Could you elaborate as to the struggle specifically? Many of us would love to help if we can.

Edit: Toi I’m sorry I missed your second line somehow.

In terms of spiritual dryness, for me a consistent prayer schedule is good. I’m not the best at keeping it, but if I set up a time then at least I know I’ll hit it.

You mentioned emotional pain. Many of us struggle here too. Could you give us some more there? I honestly think our culture in the US isn’t very good with emotions or patience. This can lead to depressions.

Insecurity can be challenging too. Can you elaborate a little more?

I’m happy to help as much as I can.

Just from what you’ve described a spiritual director and mental health counselor might be advisable, it might help to unpack and address the issues.
 
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We have no actual control over our lives. God is in charge and allows us to do good or evil; to make prudent decisions or foolish. He is with us at all times - but is the hardest to see when we surround ourselves with ourselves.

Thus, we must move outside of ourselves in order to restore perspective. I faced such a situation several times and will probably face it again. My response was to abandon all claim to my life. I prepared for its end and forced myself to trust God.

God was waiting for me to become less so that He might become greater in my life. And when I trusted Him, He handed my life back to me. It takes as close to total abandonment to God as you can muster.

EDIT: correcting the missteps of chemo-fingers.
 
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As many of us do. We can only do this life one day at a time, so hang in there like the rest of us do.
 
po18guy said:
Thus, we must move outside of ourselves in order to restore perspective.
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I second this. In perspective, there is always someone out there who is undergoing worse things than you. And in perspective, no bad situation lasts too long. After the darkness of the night, comes the light of dawn. Patient endurance.
 
I’ve always been sickly. The fear of getting serious disease constantly haunts me.
From the early age I used to have a lot of acne on my face, my back and every now and then on my head too. I had it checked and discovered that it was hormonal ance(difficult to treat). This was my biggest concern for years. I took medication that helps a little but creates more problems.
A long these years I also developed acid reflux, Gerd, and later(3 years ago) it got worse into esophagitis. I was medicated for months to treat acid reflux. My esophagitis got better but acid reflux reoccurs every now and then.
Besides, I often experience unexplainable body pains. Every time I got checked up the results are often normal.
Problems come one after the other. I’m exhausted. I don’t know why all these things happened to me. I don’t know what to do.
 
Pray and try to bear these things patiently. God is calling you to patience. If you can afford it buy St Faustinas diary and read it, theres some great passages in there on what a soul who is suffering physically is to do. I find them very comforting. Also I’d suggest meditating often on the Passion of Christ. One of the worst things we can do, and notice I say we, meaning I know how hard it is, is to focus on our physical ailments. Try again and again to give these concerns over to Jesus and trust in him. Give Jesus your burdens, he can carry them for you. Make an effort to give them to home, even if you do it hundreds of times a day. Say ‘Jesus I trust in you ’ even if you don’t feel it. Feelings are bodily things and mean little, it is your will that counts. If you want to do something that’s what counts. Feelings are just like the wind they do what they want, the sooner we learn to discount them in life the better. You are not what you feel. Dont listen to society- we do not follow the heart. The heart follows the will. The will follows God’s will and then we become rightly ordered and all will be well. Next time you feel anxious run to God interiorly to his Sacred Heart, even say it to yourself. Jesus I flee to your Sacred Heart. The teach yourself to trust in Jesus’ almighty strength and goodness. He has got you and He loves you. Learn to believe that. God bless you
 
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Bluebright said:
One of the worst things we can do, and notice I say we, meaning I know how hard it is, is to focus on our physical ailments.
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That’s also my problems. I really have great difficulty to overcome it.
 
Dear friend, trust in God.
I don’t have any special advice, I will just say

Pray, trust and do not worry.
God can heal and help us all. Without God, we are nothing. And with those three things, remember also the works of mercy(corporal and spiritual), remember to love God and others, remember to forgive and ask to be forgiven. Be cheerful, joyful, hope in the Lord. You may say, everyone said this to me, and nothing is better. And, you may be right, I probably repeated what many said. But I do know, our Father is a loving and merciful God, and if we shall trust in Him, obey Him and love Him, what is impossible to Him?
With God all things are possible. With the fear of the Lord, and with all patience, love, joy and humility bear all your troubles. Thank God. Spend time with Him.
Dear friend, I hope you recover and persevere in the Lord. I’ll put you on my prayer list tonight, and please, pray for all of us. For we are all sinners deserving punishment, and the need for the mercy of God upon this world is ever-more increasing. Christ be with you. 😀
 
Do you have access to an Adoration chapel where you can go spend time
with Jesus? Are you reading your Bible or praying?

We are all feeling little stress right now and with the Covid-19 pandemic spreading across our country and everyone having to self isolate, it is easy ro feel overwhelmed.

Just try to live day by day - put some structure in each day.

Praying for you.
 
Ok yeah some difficulties, I can only imagine how hard that must be. I’m sorry for the struggle. I’ll say some prayers for you too.

Just from my life experience I’m betting there is some judgement from people that also would be really tough to deal with?

I was pretty athletic in high school. After college and working nights I gained a bunch of weight from stress and bad habits. I lost 70lbs at one point. It’s quite amazing how much differently we’re treated when thin and strong, vs outwardly overweight. I can only guess you face the same with something like acne which is visible to others?

Rest assured God knows your pain and Judges your heart and life, not as humans do.
I’m assuming you’ve engaged with the medical community with the acne since your taking medications for it? Is there another specialist you could seek out if it’s not under control? Sometimes finding the right person can be just the ticket. Many medical providers are great, but have a broad breadth of knowledge, but not necessarily a depth on a given topic.

In terms of spiritual challenges I would recommend a good spiritual director. They can really help to see what we ourselves don’t see. Anyone you can work with at a local parish?
 
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I was lost in every way you could imagine about 4 years ago. I went through a conversion and came into the Church, but I still suffered. The thing that changed everything was going to faith based counseling. I was lucky to find a sliding scale counseling service at a Catholic parish. My counselor was a Franciscan priest who was interning while finishing up his graduate studies to become a professional counselor. Embracing faith opened me up to turning my life around and let the Holy Spirit in, but my problems needed more healing than prayer alone. My prayer life grew deeper as a result of those session but I would not have gotten there without the pastoral and mental health care that priest provided. It’s been about a year since we ended our sessions and I see the fruit of them in every aspect of my life. I’m closer to God, healthier, more confident, and achieve my goals. Maybe look into this if available.
 
Thank you,
I will Surely take your advice seriously.
I am so happy for you.
May the Lord bless you and your family!
 
Toi_nhan_31 said:
Thank you,
I will Surely take your advice seriously.
I am so happy for you.
May the Lord bless you and your family!
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I have also been a long term acne sufferer. I will give you this hint, your skin will improve once you are happier. I have a solid regimen but I would never have relieved the stress component or had the discipline to stick to a disciplined routine and have confidence it would work without healing mind and spirit first.
 
Hi Toi,

I had a very dark time that I would have described in the same terms you used three years ago. Couldn’t find any pleasure in life, couldn’t understand why I was still alive, etc.

And this was fifteen years into my close walk with Christ, I was praying every day, etc.

Here’s what got me out of it (slowly) do that now I am happier than I’ve ever been:
  1. sleep: get at least seven hours of sleep a night , but if you wake up early (like 5) and can’t go back to sleep just get up, don’t lie there and try to sleep.
  2. fresh air: take a brisk walk for at least thirty minutes, at least four days a week. This was probably the biggest help physically for me.
  3. spiritual side: depression is both physical and spiritual, but “pray more” isn’t going to help if your prayer is becoming rumination. So here’s how you pray: while you’re on your walk, you aren’t allowed to do anything mentally but thank God for things. Birds. Air. The sun. Your life. Everything.
The biggest thing that helped was constant thanksgiving prayer. Paul wrote “Give thanks to God in all circumstances for this is the will of God for you.”
 
1m

First of all I thank you for your reply. I noticed that your last post was 11 years ago. I appreciate your advice.
You’re right to mention about sleep because it’s really one of my problems. For years I didn’t have a good sleep. Every night I experienced some sort of discomfort: dreaming, nightmares, physical pain, worries…
 
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