I am a very introverted and shy person. I feel very strongly about becoming a priest; how can I overcome those feelings?

  • Thread starter Thread starter anon79053769
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
A

anon79053769

Guest
I am a very introverted and shy person. I feel very strongly about becoming a priest; I know that you have to be very willing to talk to other people. How can I overcome those feelings?
 
Not nessecarily. You can be a priest of a contemplative order- look at Padre Pio
 
I used to be painfully shy and introverted. Then I ended up in a leadership position where I had to talk to people, make difficult decisions other people didn’t want to hear, and be very visible. I grew and developed as a person, because the situation demanded it. I still prefer to be shy and introverted— but I’ve learned to shift gears and do what I need to do in order to get what needs to be done done. 😛 Because being a good leader, even if I don’t want to be a leader, is better than being a bad leader… or leaving a gap where a leader should have been, because I didn’t step up. It also helped that I realized early on that they didn’t see “me” as a person, but they saw my office. So that made things a whole lot less personal… I just had to fill the office competently; I didn’t have to be actual friends with the world.

Ask God for the grace to grow. Get some good practice in. You don’t have to be the life of the party, or the person with a hundred friends. It’s okay to be self-contained. But ask God for the graces you need to do his will, and you’ll be okay.
 
Last edited:
Pray hard about it-seriously. Over-confidence/assertiveness is not Christian, but neither is its opposite, which generally means avoiding people altogether or becoming a people-pleaser when others are around. A balanced self-love is really the order of the day; this is a good thing, a gift from God. But pride gets in our way; the desire for “inordinate self-love” as Aquinas put it, for an excellence greater than our natural capability, greater than our natures allow IOW, as if we should accept no limitations, is the culprit because this pride always judges us.

Either we feel less than its excessive standards demand of us, in which case we feel inferior, or we feel that we’re meeting those standards, in which case we feel superior. Either way we’re not simply accepting and being our true selves. Pray; this is to circumvent pride, to override its voice, to not be its slave as we reach out to our Father for help in all matters. God loves humility. Scripture says that He opposes the proud and exalts the humble. Prayer is an act of humility as, with it, we acknowledge our limitations and dependence on God and deny the voice of the world that always appeals to our ego.

It’s not “bad” to be yourself in public, and to express yourself as need be. Pray, don’t fear others opinions; fear God’s if anything. There’s a relationship between fear of other’s opinion and pride. John 12:42-43 touches on this IMO:
"Yet at the same time many even among the leaders believed in him. But because of the Pharisees they would not openly acknowledge their faith for fear they would be put out of the synagogue; for they loved human praise more than praise from God."
 
Last edited:
We know your desire. What is God’s desire for you?

This is the agonizing process of vocational discernment.

It may take years of prayer, fasting and pondering.
 
Last edited:
I am reminded of the prophets who were reluctant to follow the “call”. But a fire within them impelled them to speak out regardless of the shortcomings they thought they had. Do you have something to say about God? If you have a “call” That desire to speak out and share will override your shyness.
 
Last edited:
Shyness and introversion are different things and not even related. Introversion has specific strengths that would be an advantage. However, people generally like extraverts more. The good news is that introverts can act extroverted when the occasion calls for it.
Shyness is another matter and hopefully someone can discuss that more thoroughly, but it’s something that can be overcome. OP look up some articles and other media on introversion and extroversion. So you can understand the strengths of both. The world needs both and so does the priesthood.
 
Bruised_Reed said:
Shyness and introversion are different things and not even related
Click to expand...
Thank you! So many people seem to think the two are the same…I know several Extroverts who are shy. Shyness is a form of anxiety. I’m both introverted and shy but I know a good friend who is a professor who is an introvert but isn’t shy at all. Our priest is also more of an introvert and a bit shy. He seems to be able to do his job well as well…being an introvert just means you need a bit of recovery time…you’re not necessarily antisocial. Shyness is the real problem…that’s what you should work on.
 
anon79053769 said:
I am a very introverted and shy person. I feel very strongly about becoming a priest; I know that you have to be very willing to talk to other people. How can I overcome those feelings?
Click to expand...
Do you want to overcome your feelings of introversion and shyness?

Or your feelings about becoming a priest?

🤔
 
Introversion won’t bar you from a vocation to the priesthood. Actually nothing will if God is in fact calling you. Seminary is a time of formation, so if you are shy (which is not the same as being introverted) the priests/professors who oversee your formation will work with you on that.

I think it is important for you to distinguish between shyness and introversion. They are not the same thing. Introversion only refers to a need to spend time alone to recharge/gain energy. Shyness is a fear we sometimes have that people will not like us; therefore, we are afraid to talk to them. Our culture often mixes the two together but it is not the truth.
 
Don’t worry about that current side of you -
When God begins to ‘ take you up on your offer ‘ - you’ll blossom like a garden of flowers 😇
 
God uses ALL people! Our current parish priest is a BIG TIME introvert. He’s shared with us his story, but here’s our perspective on his personality in ministry. My husband and I are introverts and painfully shy and socially awkward (we’re nerds, and we own it!) so we have never really felt comfortable on a personal level with many priests. They are usually extroverted, charismatic, and very friendly. Enter Fr. Introvert. We clicked immediately because we understood one another. He has helped us SO MUCH to get plugged into church life, meet like-minded Catholics and grow our faith by relating to us in a way we know and feel comfortable.

He has his own struggles with being social and he has testified to the power of the Holy Spirit to lead him and he’s been a GREAT priest that everyone absolutely loves! God created you to be an introvert, WONDERFUL! It’s a gift, embrace it! No tool chest is full of exactly the same tools, our diversity is our strength. Embrace the introversion and be fearless! 🙂
 
That picture should say: “introverts disunite and isolate!”
 
I am definitely not an extrovert. I’m happiest when I’m doing something by myself. When I worked at a particular job, I came in, didn’t go out of my way to speak to anyone, went into my office, and that was that.

Then I got promoted to director with 7-8 people under me. I am not stupid. I understood that my job now had changed. My job now required me to greet everyone personally when I came into the office, and say good-bye at the end of the day. It aslo required me to understand what motivated each person, what they wanted out of their jobs, and what personal problems they might have that would affect their jobs. I was very good at it.

In fact, we had a corporate exercise where someone would come into your “office” ostensibly for one thing, but really they had some other problem. The point of the exercise was to see if you could get the other person to open up about their “secret” other problem. I turned out to be the 2nd best at the exercise–a nurse came in first.

So my advice would be that you don’t need to change your personality, but you need to change your outward activities. It’s not that hard to do.
 
Moses was shy 🤭

Aaron, his brother - had to do the talking to Pharoah !
 
Yes, it certainly can! This is one of the benefits of having this priest in our lives. He’s actually my spiritual director now since I am in a similar situation. I am a DIEHARD introvert. I am also a teacher. I have issues since these two traits can be at odds with each other at times. But he also has the struggle of an introvert in a very social call - and he is more equipped to help me than extroverts who don’t have the same struggle.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top