I am scared.....

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Rildir

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Hello everyone. If you have read my meet and greet post then you know I wish to become Catholic. Yet there is something I am very scared of…My first Confession. There are some things I have done in my life that I regret. I wish I could go back in time and change them. I sometimes get whoozy just thinking about them:(
When I go to confession, I do intend to tell the priest everything. I am just afraid what he will think of me. Has anyone gone through this? I am very scared and would appreciate any advice please! :hmmm:
 
I think most of us could say, yes - been there, done that. I’m still scared sometimes going into Confession and yes, I do worry what the priest will think of me. We are a small, isolated community so I can’t go to a different parish where the priest does not know me and I have a distinctive accent which precludes him not knowing who I am if I use the screen, no anonymous Confessions for me. I have to squash my pride which does not want to let someone I think highly of (ie the priest) know all the shameful things I have done, how I have failed to live as a follower of Christ.

I recommend this booklet from Tan Books and Publishers, “Confession: A Little Book for the Reluctant” by Msgr. Louis Gaston de Segur. “In this book, the author answers most of the common objections raised by people for not going to Confession.” tanbooks.com/index.php/page/shop:browse/offset/10/category_id/48/
Here is an excerpt.
22: What will even the Confessor think of me? He will Despise me.
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"There is nothing on earth greater, more estimable, more worthy of respect than a poor sinner who comes courageously to humble himself before God, confesses his wrongs and sins, his grievous sins, loyally and ingenuously declaring to the minister of pardon that he wishes to sin no more. This spectacle is the consolation, the most intimate joy, of the Catholic priest. If your child falls into the dirt and comes to look for you, all muddy and ashamed and sorry for what has happened to him, eager only to be cleansed and set to rights, will you despise him?
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Don’t let your fear put you off. Priests have heard it all before.
 
Yes, I have worried what the priest would think of me. But as it turned out, he was kind and gentle. He did not gasp in horror when I told him my sins or look at all surprised. If he thought less of me, he never showed it. If he even remembered the things I told him, it never showed.

A different priest told us at a parent meeting for first confession that he is humbled and awed when people come to him with their shortcomings and failings asking for forgiveness and God’s mercy. I imagine most priests feel the same way.

You’ll be OK, and you will feel lighter than air when you are done.

You’ll be in my prayers.
 
Rildir said:
Hello everyone. If you have read my meet and greet post then you know I wish to become Catholic. Yet there is something I am very scared of…My first Confession. There are some things I have done in my life that I regret. I wish I could go back in time and change them. I sometimes get whoozy just thinking about them:(
When I go to confession, I do intend to tell the priest everything. I am just afraid what he will think of me. Has anyone gone through this? I am very scared and would appreciate any advice please! :hmmm:
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Don’t be scared, the priest has heard it all before. He’s not there to judge you. Just go ahead and be honest. You won’t regret it.

God bless,
Noel.
 
The priest will think “here is a repentant child of God, who comes to confess his sins to God and to receive God’s promised forgiveness.” Why would you ever be scared of that?
 
Just remember the parable of the Prodigal Son…The father ran out to meet his errant son…ran out to meet him. When you go to confession, nothing matters to God other than you are there and repentant…And each sacrament means that you are having a meeting with Christ himself in the person of the priest. And Christ like the father in the story, runs out to meet each and everyone of us and says welcome home! Welcome home, my son. That’s the joy of the sacrament of reconciliation. It makes me cry when I receive God’s great love and divine mercy.
The number one phrase most repeated in the new testament is
"do not be afraid, I am with you always! " Just do it!:extrahappy:
 
If your priest has any years behind him at all, he will have heard everything and nothing you can say will surprise him. I have confessed some true doozies in my time and received nothing but God’s infinite mercy and grace.

As stbruno said, you are not confessing to the priest–you are speaking with Christ Himself, with the priest as a witness and intermediary. So just think of speaking to Christ and telling him of your sins—you know that Christ forgives all!

Any priest worth his salt should have the attitude that my priest has: “There’s one Judge, and I’m not Him!”
 
I am currently attending RCIA classes with the woman I am sponsoring. Father told the class that just a few days after his ordination he had to hear confessions for several hours. That was over 25 years ago and since then he has only hear one sin he didn’t hear that day. He also said he forgets who confessed what, even when he recognizes voices.

So, don’t be afraid, your priest has heard it before, and he will forget what you confessed after you leave.
 
Are you a baptized Catholic, another religion, or unbaptized? I’m currently in RCIA (I will receive baptism, communion, and confirmation at Easter Vigil) and we have been told that the unbaptized do not have to go to confession until after the Easter Vigil since baptism will not only wash away Original Sin, but every sin we have commited up to that point. So we don’t have to go to confession. Now, our RCIA director and Priest want us to go to confession so that we know what it’s like before the Easter Vigil.

Honestly, I’m not worried about what my Priest will think of me after confession. From my understanding, when we go to confession, we’re not telling the Priest our sins, we’re telling Jesus.
 
Rildir said:
Hello everyone. If you have read my meet and greet post then you know I wish to become Catholic. Yet there is something I am very scared of…My first Confession. There are some things I have done in my life that I regret. I wish I could go back in time and change them. I sometimes get whoozy just thinking about them:(
When I go to confession, I do intend to tell the priest everything. I am just afraid what he will think of me. Has anyone gone through this? I am very scared and would appreciate any advice please! :hmmm:
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A wise priest once reminded me

“I am not here to judge you”

Unfortunately, everyone in the secular world judges others instantly, so it becomes a kind of habit to make sure you don’t say anything that will bring you condemnation.

However, don’t forget that you are not the same person who did the things back then, so in confessing the sin you are not revealing anything about yourself that you have not already (or are at least trying to) correct.

There are, however, no secret prayers to make it any easier, and it will be tough. But, as soon as I think that only the devil wins if I don’t make that confession, it gives me the impetus to go ahead and do it (even now). 👍

In Jesus Christ,
 
These confession stories may help you confess your sins.

My adult son had not been to church in 15yrs. He was truly afraid of the priest of what he would say to him.
He was relieved when the priest said to him, “Welcome back”.
My son got so happy that he became very active in his parish that he is now a certified catachism teacher for high school kids.

He advised me to also go to confession during the time of Advent when priests are more likely to be more accepting of people who have been gone a long time from the church.
During my confession the priest was more interested in knowing if I was truly sorry for my sins. He didn’t seem to care too much about what my sins were but more if I was truly sorry.
I guess each priest is different so try to find a priest who will be understanding of your fear. You can ask around at the parish.

No matter how old some of us are… we are like children when some of us go to confession. I know I am like that.

The priests always say they have heard it all. That is true.

Remember… once you have confessed that sin that has been bothering you all these years… you will be relieved that you have confessed it and you will be able to move on in your life without that sin hanging over your head. It will be erased from your soul forever. That is what makes confession great.
 
You are blessed to realize what you had done in the past was bad. Thanks be to God for that.

I could tell you what the priest thinks of you - He is happy for you and see you as a child of God.

Be at peace my friend. With this peace, you would love to go to Confession and tell Jesus everything you want to tell Him, and in return He blesses you with graces to keep you on His Path.

God bless.
 
Rildir said:
Hello everyone. If you have read my meet and greet post then you know I wish to become Catholic. Yet there is something I am very scared of…My first Confession. There are some things I have done in my life that I regret. I wish I could go back in time and change them. I sometimes get whoozy just thinking about them:(
When I go to confession, I do intend to tell the priest everything. I am just afraid what he will think of me. Has anyone gone through this? I am very scared and would appreciate any advice please! :hmmm:
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Some things to keep in mind:
  • Priest have heard everything and there is nothing you can say that will be new to him
  • Priests must confess their sins as well; he knows how you feel
  • Priests admire the fortitude it takes to face up to our past sins and to die to ourselves.
  • Priests are trained to forget the sins you mention.
  • You are certainly within your rights to make your first confession anonymously, behind a screen. I prefer to make confessions face to face but the option is there for both to suit the needs of the penitent.
  • Everyone is at least a bit nervous prior to confession. It is well worth it. When you leave the confessional, your slate will have been wiped clean and you will want to dance back down the aisle!
  • Keep the ‘garbage’ around with you and you start to ‘stink’ of it. 😉
    Peace be with you. Be not afraid.
Kelly
 
I heard a priest discussing this topic yesterday. He views situations like yours in a very “academic” way. Sin is evil and it is not a surprise when someone who has not been given the gifts of all the sacraments, to sin. Evil/sin is insidious and cancerous to a soul, so multiple sins are expected when one is without the help of God’s Grace. He passes no judgement because, as a sinner himself, he relies on frequent reception of confession and the Holy Eucharist to avoid a sinful life. He said he is thrilled when one discovers reconcilliation for the first time!

Go and embrace this beautiful Gift that Our Lord has left us! Without the sacrament of Reconciliation, we could all write a book larger than the largest dictionary, filled with only the sins we could “remember.” (Frankly, I think my book is larger even with the Gift of confession!)
 
Aw, please don’t be afraid…:hug1: Everyone has given such great advice here. It is true, that there is nothing you can confess… that most priest’s haven’t heard at least once, already.

Keep in mind, that when we receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation… it is a personal encounter with Our Merciful Lord. He loves us so much…

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

I would also suggest, that prior to your Reconciliation… say a prayer to Our Lady… and ask her to walk with you, to Confession. It is amazing, how she strengthens her children when they seek to do Our Lord’s Will. God bless you.
 
I was baptized when I was about 14. But I did not convert to the Catholic Church until I was 43. As I had spent my entire adult life as an atheist, my initial confession spanning 29 years had to cover a good deal of territory.

I was terrified of confession. I envied the others in my RCIA class who had not been baptized. They would not need to confess. But me, well I had to confess everything since my baptism, 29 years before. I spent a days preparing for it. I ended up having to write down everything (in code!) just so I could remember to confess it.

And the things I had to confess. Woooo! :eek: I mean I lived a totally Godless and amoral life for more than 2 decades! (NARAL supporter, ACLU contributor, Democrat, vocal enemy of Christianity, good at picking up women, assisted in two procured abortions, etc.) I had seemingly countless grave sins on my soul.

My first confession took the better part of an hour. But that was mostly because I just named the sins, I did not go into details.

And what did the priest say at the end? I mean other than granting absolution. He said, “You have confessed nothing that I have not heard already.”

Never in my life had I experienced that wonderful feeling of lightness and relief as I did after leaving the confessional for the very first time.

Now I go to confession quite frequently. Doing so prevents my burdens from getting too heavy.

Do not be afraid. Confession is the wonderful sacrament of healing! 👍
 
Thank you everyone. I see now that I am confessing my sins to Christ and I should not be afraid. I have done bad things but I guess if we weren’t sinfull we would be in the Garden of Eden. I cannot begin to imagine the relief I will feel leaving the confessional.😃
 
Rildir… when you leave the confessional… you will feel like the angels are lifting you up! The cleansing of the soul is a feeling of indescribable joy! You will actually begin to look forward to your next confession! The Sacrament of Reconciliation is SUCH a gift and blessing. God bless you! :harp:
 
Rildir said:
Hello everyone. If you have read my meet and greet post then you know I wish to become Catholic. Yet there is something I am very scared of…My first Confession. There are some things I have done in my life that I regret. I wish I could go back in time and change them. I sometimes get whoozy just thinking about them:(
When I go to confession, I do intend to tell the priest everything. I am just afraid what he will think of me. Has anyone gone through this? I am very scared and would appreciate any advice please! :hmmm:
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You can have confidence in knowing that Priests have literally heard it all. They really have… I am sure whatever it is you have to confess it won’t be anything new.

Also, I know of a Priest who says that his best parishioners are the ones who go to frequent confession – they tend to be the most humble and devoted parishioners. He also assured his congregation that he doesn’t look down on or think badly of anyone for what they confess… Rather he admires their courage, devotion, and humility.

In fact, if you have any questions for this Priest here is his web site: fjicthus.com/. Click on the very first link “Father James Farfaglia”, and therein you will find his email address.
 
James_2_24 said:
You can have confidence in knowing that Priests have literally heard it all. They really have… I am sure whatever it is you have to confess it won’t be anything new.

Also, I know of a Priest who says that his best parishioners are the ones who go to frequent confession – they tend to be the most humble and devoted parishioners. He also assured his congregation that he doesn’t look down on or think badly of anyone for what they confess… Rather he admires their courage, devotion, and humility.

In fact, if you have any questions for this Priest here is his web site: fjicthus.com/. Click on the very first link “Father James Farfaglia”, and therein you will find his email address.
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What a wonderful site! I have bookmarked it. Thank you.
 
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