I Called My Mother Disgusting When She Was Being Immature

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My mother said something very immature, and I said that she was being disgusting. I did not intend to disrespect her, and she wasn’t offended. I don’t know if I offended God though. Did I disrespect her?

Also, what is disrespecting your parents?
 
Mary_Gail_36 said:
Hi.

I really think you could use an examination of conscience like this one:

usccb.org/prayer-and-worship/sacraments-and-sacramentals/penance/sacrament-reconciliation-young-adults-examination-of-conscience.cfm

And I would also suggest a regular confessor, the same priest every time, and that you let him know you have a hard time examining your conscience and determining what is sinful.
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Thanks for the link! It didn’t mention my specific issue here, so I guess I’m still in a state of grace (I just went to confession this morning.)

One thing that really confused me with that list is that it mentions “Have you read the bible?”. I never read the bible, but I do read the daily USCCB readings every now and then. Is it sinful to not read the bible, or is this geared more towards minors who have religious parents who tell them to read the bible? :confused:
 
Melodeonist said:
Thanks for the link! It didn’t mention my specific issue here, so I guess I’m still in a state of grace (I just went to confession this morning.)

One thing that really confused me with that list is that it mentions “Have you read the bible?”. I never read the bible, but I do read the daily USCCB readings every now and then. Is it sinful to not read the bible, or is this geared more towards minors who have religious parents who tell them to read the bible? :confused:
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The daily Mass readings are from the Bible. So you are reading the Bible even if you are not reading an actual hardcover copy of the Bible.

The list in this one is a good one, but it’s not so much a “checklist” as a springboard for you to think about your attitude and motivations. Are you interested in growing and learning about the Faith? One way to know is if you are reading Scripture regularly.

If you fail to do these things you are not necessarily guilty of mortal sin. That’s why it’s so important to have a regular confessor, especially as a new Catholic, who you are honest with as far as your difficulties understanding. They have heard it all, and they have studied a lot of theology and can help you understand. If they can’t answer your question to your satisfaction, they also have access to resources that may provide more assistance.
 
I have a friend who knows she is very outspoken and she says that every time she is tempted she says in her heart. “Set thou a watch before my tongue…”
 
Melodeonist said:
My mother said something very immature, and I said that she was being disgusting. I did not intend to disrespect her, and she wasn’t offended. I don’t know if I offended God though. Did I disrespect her?

Also, what is disrespecting your parents?
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Why do you think you and your mother do not get along?
 
Hoosier_Daddy said:
Why do you think you and your mother do not get along?
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I don’t understand? :confused:

Me and my mother get along fine. It’s only about once a day or less that we get into political arguments. Sometimes more, sometimes less.

My mother was making a joke about feces, so I told her she was being immature and disgusting. She wasn’t offended by me telling her that to my knowledge. 🤷
 
Melodeonist said:
I don’t understand? :confused:
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You post A LOT about either you baiting your parents or the other way around, about arguing with your parents, about getting angry and saying things either yelling or using bad language, etc.

When you post these things so frequently it is not that difficult to see how someone could draw the conclusion that you don’t get along. “I don’t understand” is a rather disingenuous response.
Melodeonist said:
Me and my mother get along fine. It’s only about once a day or less that we get into political arguments. Sometimes more, sometimes less.
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Yeah, so that isn’t normal.
Melodeonist said:
My mother was making a joke about feces, so I told her she was being immature and disgusting. She wasn’t offended by me telling her that to my knowledge. 🤷
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That isn’t normal either.
 
Melodeonist said:
Thanks for the link! It didn’t mention my specific issue here, so I guess I’m still in a state of grace (I just went to confession this morning.)
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It doesn’t need to mention your specific situation to apply to you.
Melodeonist said:
One thing that really confused me with that list is that it mentions “Have you read the bible?”. I never read the bible, but I do read the daily USCCB readings every now and then.
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How else do you come to know God’s word but by studying it.
Melodeonist said:
Is it sinful to not read the bible, or is this geared more towards minors who have religious parents who tell them to read the bible? :confused:
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It is sinful to neglect God’s word and study of the faith, whether minor or adult. It is up to you to decide if the effort and attention you gives these things is sufficient or not. “Never” or “very infrequently” would probably merit further reflection.
 
Melodeonist said:
I don’t understand? :confused:

Me and my mother get along fine. It’s only about once a day or less that we get into political arguments. Sometimes more, sometimes less.

My mother was making a joke about feces, so I told her she was being immature and disgusting. She wasn’t offended by me telling her that to my knowledge. 🤷
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Well, she was joking, and she was being disgusting. Lighten up a little. She figured you were joking back with her. My kids and I joke around like that all the time, make fun of each other, the boys make disgusting jokes and we girls tell them they are sick. They laugh it off and we go on with life. Sometimes people do things like that to get a response and get people riled up. It’s not polite, but it’s far from sinful. Relax with life and find away to enjoy it. I’ve got a close friend that is kind of uptight with things too, and she’s about the best person I’ve ever met. I’m sure you are as well. The thing that worries me is she is more often upset, depressed, aggravated, etc as well and struggles to allow herself to have fun. She’s getting better by talking to the priest in confession in a regular basis and also by hanging out with my kids a few times a week. She’s starting to realize that people laughing and sometimes being rude and impolite are good for the soul. Now I’m talking very mild g rated stuff. Nothing truly rude or nasty here. Just normal kid stuff that sometimes we as adults forget to laugh about ourselves. Talk to your priest and make time to laugh. You’ll be fine in life
 
bitterhope said:
My kids and I joke around like that all the time, make fun of each other, the boys make disgusting jokes and we girls tell them they are sick. They laugh it off and we go on with life. Sometimes people do things like that to get a response and get people riled up. It’s not polite, but it’s far from sinful.
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It’s far from holy, too.

What an unfortunate example to give children.
 
OP. You ALWAYS think you know better than your parents.
You spend an inordinate amount of time arguing with them.
Do you have any friends your own age?
Any outside interests? Besides the accordion.
If you are too old to be cordial with your own parents, then I wonder how you will manage elsewhere.
I would give ANYTHING to be able to speak with my mother

Count your blessings and really speak HONESTLY with your confessor.
I feel like you do the same with him.
“Everything is FINE! Can you absolve me now please?”

Read that examination on conscience and be open to the fact that you tend to be critical of anyone who disagrees with you.

Edited to add:
This Forum is not a confessional These are things you should say in confession. You should have learned this in RCIA. And when you go, be honest with the priest. He is there to help you.
 
You can always counter your mother’s banter. Ask her what is brown and sits on a piano stool. If she looks puzzled, then you chime in “Mozart’s final movement!”

My sister used to love that joke. I don’t know why.
 
Melodeonist said:
I don’t understand? :confused:

Me and my mother get along fine. It’s only about once a day or less that we get into political arguments. Sometimes more, sometimes less.

My mother was making a joke about feces, so I told her she was being immature and disgusting. She wasn’t offended by me telling her that to my knowledge. 🤷
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You post constantly about disrespecting your parents, fighting with family members and them disrespecting your beliefs. That you are posting as if you all get along fine is concerning. They purposely mess With your beliefs to the point of mocking you about a pebble you found by the road. And you purposely egg them on about political beliefs.

You have presented an unhealthy view of your life.

Please stop posting about these things and seek counsel from a priest and therapist.

This is not healthy for you. And frankly it’s worrisome to those of us who read it.
 
pianistclare said:
OP. You ALWAYS think you know better than your parents.
You spend an inordinate amount of time arguing with them.
Do you have any friends your own age?
Any outside interests? Besides the accordion.
If you are too old to be cordial with your own parents, then I wonder how you will manage elsewhere.
I would give ANYTHING to be able to speak with my mother

Count your blessings and really speak HONESTLY with your confessor.
I feel like you do the same with him.
“Everything is FINE! Can you absolve me now please?”

Read that examination on conscience and be open to the fact that you tend to be critical of anyone who disagrees with you.

Edited to add:
This Forum is not a confessional These are things you should say in confession. You should have learned this in RCIA. And when you go, be honest with the priest. He is there to help you.
Click to expand...
I know many people my age. I get along fine with them. I have many other interests besides just playing the accordion.

The only people I ever have trouble getting along with are my parents. I seem to have formed a habit of having no regards for their feelings like I do for other people. I don’t know how to break this habit, but I bet God can help me.

I am always honest to my confessor. What reason would I have to lie to him? 🤷
 
Melodeonist said:
My mother said something very immature, and I said that she was being disgusting. I did not intend to disrespect her, and she wasn’t offended. I don’t know if I offended God though. Did I disrespect her?

Also, what is disrespecting your parents?
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Context is everything.

If this was a light moment, people were laughing, your mom said something and you say something along the lines of (“ewww, you’re disgusteeeng”) with a laugh and smile on your face, that can hardly be construed as disrepect.

On the other hand, if you’re having a fight, your mom says something and in anger you hurl a “you’re a disgusting woman”, this can clearly constitute disrespect as the intention to hurt or degrade your mother is there.

Context and intention. Only you can determine that.
 
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