I never asked for anything just for myself. When I was still young (about 10-12 years old and extremely naïve), I did ask for some extraordinary powers, but only because I wanted to help people in need.
That sounds good but certainly, the exploration and understanding of God requires more maturity. I think, to expect the kind of significant miracles from the first childhood attempts at prayer is to misunderstand. We’re building a relationship with our creator with prayer. And, it is a two-way communication. There is also an opportunity for us to give and receive - in a two-way situation. Your own experiences of human love are a good analogy.
Let me ask you: “how many negative outcomes would shake your faith”?
Just following on the above I note your term “outcomes”. That’s a term used in experimental science and it’s fine to some degree. But prayer, while it has an experimental aspect, is truly a communication with another person, God in this case. When you talk and express yourself to a person, you don’t think about “outcomes” as if you’re testing a chemical reaction.
But to go on, what ends up happening over the course of time in prayer, is that the believer no longer looks at outcomes or results as if we are testing to see what will happen. Yes, many people pray like that - as if God is a strange force out there and we have to try various things until “something happens”. That is actually not a bad way to do it at the beginning. We wonder why God responds or not. What will make Him answer? But God is not like a machine that we have to know what buttons to push. He has a reason and purpose and meaning for everything He does. He is living. And - He wants only what is the very best for us.
So, to answer your question – and many saints had this happen – if I was plunged into spiritual darkness, pain and tremendous misfortune (where everything was turning against me in every way) – yes, my faith would be shaken. Our Lord’s faith itself, as immensely strong as it was, was shaken at the night of His arrest and when He was being killed. So, negative outcomes appear in the life of a believer. God tests and builds the strength of our faith on those things.
But that’s the negative outcomes. What you didn’t ask, however, is the positive outcomes. What about those?
In my life of prayer over a course of time, I have experienced positive outcomes that go far, far beyond anything I could have created on my own, or any accidental coincidence. These outcomes are from an internal test - that only I could know the details. When a person experiences a few of those – the belief in God’s presence is locked in. It becomes absolutely certain at that point. Nobody can explain away what the person has experienced.
When that starts happening (positive outcomes that no coincidence or accident of nature could explain) - faith is built up. We then learn, there is a price to pay for positive results. For healings, blessings, gifts, protections, insights, and actual communication with God - there is a cost. But when we see those positives, we are willing to pay any price for them. That’s the “pearl of great price” in the Bible. The man sold everything to have it. Once that happens - no amount of “negative outcomes” would every weaken faith. Again, a saint like St. John of the Cross suffered incredible misfortune, hostility, persecution, injustice, physical torture - and his faith only grew stronger.
So, finally - back to the “outcomes”, what eventually happens over a long time of prayer - watching and listening carefully for God’s answer (he is described as a ‘still, small voice’ - you can’t have a lot of noise, emotion, anger, confusion, ego in your life to hear it) – is that every minute of the day is a positive outcome. God becomes your friend. He is there - constantly. He is guiding, enlightening, showing, blessing, teaching, warning – on every step of your life. You learn how to read His voice in all the events of life, external signals and internal guidances.
Yes, certainly it is the result of experimentation. We try, we fall, we learn, we stand again and try again – we make progress in the spiritual life! That’s what it’s all about.
So, I would sincerely urge you, Vera – you’re a man who is seeking, you look into things – give that an experimental try again. Seek and you will find. It’s pretty amazing to think about it, but you have the creator of the universe, who truly loves you, who knew you before your were born, who knows all your good attributes and your flaws, who wants you to have a very good life, who has every answer to every question, who has immense power – all of that! And He is right there, waiting to accompany you and to communicate Himself to you!
I can’t imagine a more exciting thing to explore, to find, and to build a life around.
Sure, and the result is almost always “negative”. Once in a “double blue moon” something seemingly positive happens, but you can never count on it.
Ok, final thought on this. Negative results occur, certainly. But your goal is to get and receive and multiply positive results.
So, when receiving a negative result, it’s essential to think about yourself and those things I mentioned. Remember, if you’re asking for a gift – there is the question of worthiness of the asker. “Have I really shown myself as ready and worthy of that kind of gift?” If you are living selfishly, for example, would it be better to fix that first before asking for something? Additionally, am I willing to give something in exchange for receiving an undeserved gift?
So, a couple of good prayer intentions to start are:
- To recognize that God exists, to see some evidence of His presence
- For help in overcoming some flaw in our character - first, for help in seeing the flaw
Why not be generous. In this case we have about 100 million intercessory prayers every day.