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Donald_S
Guest
What harm can they do?
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BigRon
Guest
The can refuse a reference to my next employer which is a red flag for them. I’m stuck at home on basic pay just waiting. My witness probably forgot what happened, it was in November.
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Annie
Guest
Have you called the unemployment office, state labor relations board, [ETA: any professional organizations you company may need to answer to] or any place that might be able to assess this both for legality and truth? I feel like they are just telling you that in order to get you to hang around for their process to end. You should definitely be calling people to get to the bottom of this.My work state that if I leave before they have made a decision they see it as me being guilty and they can do harm so I am in limbo.
Have you asked you wife why she is taking what her uninvolved friend says over what you say? Maybe you will want to talk this over with someone who knows the two of you IRL, but it just seems odd to me that your wife would do that, and it seems that her doing that is what is causing the problem between you two.
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Donald_S
Guest
That’s not much of a threat nowadays. My company doesn’t even call previous employers. I’ve never had any job call my previous employers.The can refuse a reference to my next employer which is a red flag for them. I’m stuck at home on basic pay just waiting. My witness probably forgot what happened, it was in November.
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meltzerboy2
Guest
I must say you have given the OP very good and comprehensive advice. Now it’s up to him to put it into practice.
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EndTimes
Guest
Have you gone to your parish?I got suspended from work 1 month ago but they still haven’t told me why or called me for a meeting it is very distressing especially as my wife is taking it out on me by giving me the silent treatment for nearly 4 weeks I feel invisible and rejected. No intimacy at the moment or for a while now and Christmas is almost here and I am very depressed and not coping with life. I have prayed over the last month more than ever but feel very alone in life what if God says no to my prayers I cold lose everything for ever. I have also fasted more than I ever have and I just want to keep crying all day. What else can I do
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Kindnessmatters
Guest
They can say what they want but it really doesn’t mean anything. They are playing dumb games.
If they fire you, you will get unemployment unless you were fired for cause, which they have to prove to the government…not up to the employer and the government favors the employee. Being bad at your job isn’t even enough to deny benefits…you have to have willfully have violated the law or company policy like blowing off work and not calling, or failing a drug test or stealing.
If you get another job, they are powerless to do anything about it. If two years from now you have to list them as a reference, you can say they laid you off for apparent financial reasons and there was no guarantee of rehire, so you changed jobs. If they lie and say you were fired, it is against the law and you can sue them.
So…
If they fire you, you will get unemployment unless you were fired for cause, which they have to prove to the government…not up to the employer and the government favors the employee. Being bad at your job isn’t even enough to deny benefits…you have to have willfully have violated the law or company policy like blowing off work and not calling, or failing a drug test or stealing.
If you get another job, they are powerless to do anything about it. If two years from now you have to list them as a reference, you can say they laid you off for apparent financial reasons and there was no guarantee of rehire, so you changed jobs. If they lie and say you were fired, it is against the law and you can sue them.
So…
- Get another job
- Say nothing to your current employer.
- Take the layoff pay as long as it is offered
- If you are called back, resign effective immediately. If you must return to avoid repaying the layoff wages, go back for a day, tell them too much damage was done by the layoff, and resign.
- If you are fired instead of recalled, request and take severence.
- If you are fired before you get a job, ask for severence and file for unemployment even if the employer claims you don’t qualify…it is not up to them.
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TheLittleLady
Guest
Here in the US, work references are like this:
I can confirm that Mr Ron Big worked for us from X date to Y date.
His job title was Blah.
His rate of pay/salary was XXXXX.
He is/is not eligible for rehire.
That is it. The old days of “I can tell you, he farted all the time and refused to chip in for birthday cakes, do not hire this guy” sort of references were over many years ago.
Most places won’t even allow a manager to write a “letter of reference” for a former employee for fear of lawsuits.
Edit to add: if this is a place with a professional HR department, all reference checks go directly to HR.
Seems like someone may be gaslighting you.
I can confirm that Mr Ron Big worked for us from X date to Y date.
His job title was Blah.
His rate of pay/salary was XXXXX.
He is/is not eligible for rehire.
That is it. The old days of “I can tell you, he farted all the time and refused to chip in for birthday cakes, do not hire this guy” sort of references were over many years ago.
Most places won’t even allow a manager to write a “letter of reference” for a former employee for fear of lawsuits.
Edit to add: if this is a place with a professional HR department, all reference checks go directly to HR.
Seems like someone may be gaslighting you.
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Legend
Guest
WOW!!!
This company policy would have had me out the door so fast, but then, I never had a family to support. I’m not crazy about jobs, anyway. No, I’m no MLM recruiter. I’m for learning to do something, learning to do it well, and then, selling it to individuals/companies at a fair price. Although I admit, I didn’t get that much of a chance to do this. Now, I’m retired.
But enough about me…
OP,
I take it that you were suspended because this woman accused you of some kind of sexual misconduct? And your wife was informed, maybe because this ‘friend’ of hers, told her about the usual policy???
You should not have had to go through this! It may even work in your favor…your ‘misconduct’ was so miniscule that the one eyewitness can’t even remember it well!
I’m just reading this now, so, forgive me if I gloss over some points. I’m guessing that the company you work for, or one of its high-profile partners or associates has a reputation for, in the past, ignoring or making light of, incidents of sexual abuse.
Which IS wrong. But, is causing your situation, in essence, helping to cause domestic tension during the holidays, the way to make up for it? Not im my experience. No way!
Well, no advice, at this point, but I do pray that this can be settled with the minimum of trouble, and your marriage begins to heal. Sorry…one piece of advice…if possible, find another job and leave, once this is settled, if you’re reasonably sure you’re new job has no hidden ‘policies’ similar to the one you’re in now.
Peace, good luck, and God Bless!
This company policy would have had me out the door so fast, but then, I never had a family to support. I’m not crazy about jobs, anyway. No, I’m no MLM recruiter. I’m for learning to do something, learning to do it well, and then, selling it to individuals/companies at a fair price. Although I admit, I didn’t get that much of a chance to do this. Now, I’m retired.
But enough about me…
OP,
I take it that you were suspended because this woman accused you of some kind of sexual misconduct? And your wife was informed, maybe because this ‘friend’ of hers, told her about the usual policy???
You should not have had to go through this! It may even work in your favor…your ‘misconduct’ was so miniscule that the one eyewitness can’t even remember it well!
I’m just reading this now, so, forgive me if I gloss over some points. I’m guessing that the company you work for, or one of its high-profile partners or associates has a reputation for, in the past, ignoring or making light of, incidents of sexual abuse.
Which IS wrong. But, is causing your situation, in essence, helping to cause domestic tension during the holidays, the way to make up for it? Not im my experience. No way!
Well, no advice, at this point, but I do pray that this can be settled with the minimum of trouble, and your marriage begins to heal. Sorry…one piece of advice…if possible, find another job and leave, once this is settled, if you’re reasonably sure you’re new job has no hidden ‘policies’ similar to the one you’re in now.
Peace, good luck, and God Bless!
K
Kindnessmatters
Guest
No sense talking in riddles…we are here to help. What are they accusing you of doing? Did you do what they said? This is an anonymous site.
I cannot think of a situation where an employer can convict you, or stop you from getting another job when they have laid you off.
Did you do or get accused of some immoral behaviour at work that angered/hurt your wife or is she just mad you are laid off?
I cannot think of a situation where an employer can convict you, or stop you from getting another job when they have laid you off.
Did you do or get accused of some immoral behaviour at work that angered/hurt your wife or is she just mad you are laid off?
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Legend
Guest
I believe this is the explanation he was given, after six weeks! Since it’s not a crime to stop someone from falling, I guessed, in my own answer, that the accuser was saying he made a sexual grab for her.I didn’t know for six weeks but it turns out I have been accused of grabbing someone’s arm in order to stop them hurting themselves. The woman has retaliated with lies as I had to report her previously for something serious only the previous manager never suspended people and she waited for the first day of the new manager. It has caused major problems in my home as my wife’s friend is stirring trouble saying things like I must know what I was suspended for (originally they keep you in suspense to stop you looking for alibis), she keeps saying to my wife that I’m selfish for being and home and not looking for another job. Firstly I cannot quit my job as they take that as an admission of guilt, secondly I am still being paid my basic wage which would be identical to a new job on minimum wage with full time hours. Before all this happened we were happy but this morning she told me she doesn’t want to be with me anymore.
I did nothing wrong at work and have been honest with her the whole time and this is the treatment I get. I am so angry now at this woman and my wife’s friend, at first I kept telling God that I forgive them but now I’m too angry with them. I also had hope and faith in God that He would help me but that’s pretty much gone as He is watching my world fall apart. I have never prayed and fasted so much but it all seems pointless.
I could lose everything because of calumny. I hate my life so much.
There are some companies that have ignored such behavior from their employees, and now overcompensate. Making someone wait six weeks is a bit much, however, and such behavior (suspension with less pay, being kept in ignorance of charges for six weeks) would never be tolerated in a court of law, whether civil or criminal.
It’s hard to believe such companies don’t have trouble getting/keeping employees! Maybe people just don’t think about it, or knowing their own intentions, don’t think it can possibly effect them! The OP’s plight shows how wrong this can be. Why his wife would turn against him is troubling, but things like this just aren’t supposed to happen! I hope his employer has to face a real court of law, in the near future.
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BigRon
Guest
Why do people assume sexual stuff? Where I work if someone is going to harm someone else or themselves you have to use physical intervention (restraint), this articular guy only has one problem ,he will pick up any cup to drink it, he doesn’t understand, just grabs it even if it was full of boiling water or something worse. A member of staff had an open can of red bull (which is banned on site) and it will make him very ill as he cannot consume caffeine, it is enough to get in his way before he can grab it and get it yourself first. This woman is vindictive as I had reported her previously, she said I grabbed his arm to stop him grabbing the drink, funny thing is she wasn’t even in the room. In my company you can literally accuse anyone of anything and they drag you down the same route. If I go back there is nothing stopping her making another allegation the moment I walk in even if there are witnesses.
I explained in my hearing that if I had of restrained him I would have used the correct technique but it wasn’t needed. I have seen a lot of people go through allegations in the last year but this member of staff chose to report me to the new manager on his first day and he deals with everything with a suspension so unlucky with that.
I explained in my hearing that if I had of restrained him I would have used the correct technique but it wasn’t needed. I have seen a lot of people go through allegations in the last year but this member of staff chose to report me to the new manager on his first day and he deals with everything with a suspension so unlucky with that.
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Legend
Guest
Sorry for jumping to conclusions.
This company has to find a better way of dealing with misunderstandings. Hope things get resolved, it will be soon.
God bless!
This company has to find a better way of dealing with misunderstandings. Hope things get resolved, it will be soon.
God bless!
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Elf01
Guest
Is @BigRon in the US? In Asia from what I know it can be a lot more difficult to quit.I can confirm that Mr Ron Big worked for us from X date to Y date.
His job title was Blah.
His rate of pay/salary was XXXXX.
He is/is not eligible for rehire.
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BigRon
Guest
I’m in England.
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Elf01
Guest
I think the situation there is more similar to the US. If you have a reference from someone at your employer, or even a previous job, you should be able to get a new job. You’re probably going to be rejected if you apply to your current employer again, but I’d see that as a hit worth taking. Especially since you say it can happen just as easily again.I’m in England.
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BigRon
Guest
I won’t go back if they give me the choice as it’s toxic. I saw a member of staff today who told me it has got so much worse since the new manager arrived. A lot of neglect in that place that they never sorted, even the outside agencies were useless.
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Legend
Guest
I just re-read this post. I was kind of in a hurry, and glossed over it before. So, after understanding the full story…
Unbelievable! This company suspends people over the proper way of consuming snacks, and soft drinks. And, to top things off, sees to it that every good deed goes punished!
I can’t believe how this company keeps any employees! If it were me, I’d quit before I was hired!
I don’t think you have/had any trouble, unless they had found a way to keep their policies a ‘deep, dark, secret’. Although I live in the U.S., I question the legality of this practice!
If you can find a lawyer who is willing to answer a very short question on this subject, for free or for a nominal fee, do so at once! Also, inform the police and government authorities.
Why a human being would allow oneself to be treated in such a way is beyond me!!!
Unbelievable! This company suspends people over the proper way of consuming snacks, and soft drinks. And, to top things off, sees to it that every good deed goes punished!
I can’t believe how this company keeps any employees! If it were me, I’d quit before I was hired!
I don’t think you have/had any trouble, unless they had found a way to keep their policies a ‘deep, dark, secret’. Although I live in the U.S., I question the legality of this practice!
If you can find a lawyer who is willing to answer a very short question on this subject, for free or for a nominal fee, do so at once! Also, inform the police and government authorities.
Why a human being would allow oneself to be treated in such a way is beyond me!!!
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