I feel like I don't know God anymore

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mvilladefreitas

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I don’t know how to explain this very well but in the last few weeks I’ve been feeling very tempted to stop trying to follow God. I go to the Mass everyday, and I usually confess my sins one to two times a week. I pray the rosary almost every day. As soon as I’m really awake I offer my day to God. I go to bed… I pray and I thank God for my day and I do a conscience examination. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong but I always feel tempted to stop doing this. I’m always doubting of the presence of Christ in the Eucharist. I even doubt of Christ Himself. I ask God to help me and to help me strengthen my faith. I always remember of St Teresa of Calcuta who had a harsh experience and never stopped persisting. Is this normal? Has this ever happened to anyone? Please pray for me. I’ll pray for you.
 
Oh friend, do not be disheartened! In my life, I have found stagnancy in my relationship with Jesus comes from me. Jesus is with you, carrying you, always there with open arms to truly LOVE YOU. Open up your Bible and start reading…I love to meditate on Isaiah 53 as St. Thérèse of Lisieux did. I read about her a lot and her story is so poignantly beautiful! Write a letter to Jesus like a best friend…tell Him everything you just told us. Read His words in the Gospels. He is speaking to YOU. Do not grow weary…you are not meant to feel at home on earth.
 
It is a process.I remember i didnt fully believe in presence of Christ in eucharist.than I read about a story of a priest who was doubting it was really Blood and body of Jesus.And one day the leftover of Eucharist become the real body(meat) and Blood.Everyone is diffrent but little stories Like this give me a huge boost in believing.continue to Pray the rosary.
 
Keep doing what your doing. Whats helped me through the sadder moments is just understanding that life isnt about being happy all the time.

Now with the doubt, I cant really help as much because I cant really relate. Although, in order to get rid of doubt you have to believe in the Eucharist.

Read John 6, thats all about the Eucharist. The body and blood is like the different forms of water.
Water can be a solid, gas, and a liquid. Its different, but its all water still.
In a similar way, the wafer and wine is in the form of body and blood when the Priest consecrates. It may not look like body and blood, but it definitely is just like Jesus says. Hope I helped bit!
 
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Thank you so much. I write Him a letter everyday 🙂 I usually do it to thank Him the good and the bad things that happened to me during the day. I’ll meditate on Isaiah as St. Thérèse did! For me, she’s one of the most awesome saints ever. I really appreciate your lovely anwser, I hope one day to find stagnancy as well. I’ll pray for you 😉
 
If you go to confession twice a week, you may have scrupulosity or religious OCD in order to “fix” anxiety or guilt.
 
Thank you very much for your answer. I read a book called “Jesus, Our Eucharistic Love: Eucharistic Life Exemplified by the Saints” by Stefano M. Manelli. I immediately started to fell in love for the Eucharist and for the God I knew who existed in It ( pardon my English). But as soon as I stopped reading the book and I started to want to figure out more about the Holy Eucharist for myself, I noticed that it’s very hard to believe He really is present there except for when I’m on the Mass. Whenever the Priest consecrates and he raises his arms, I know that’s the body of Christ. I just know. But when the Mass is over, if I think about it, it’s hard to believe. ( It’s super complicated).
 
Thank you. I try not to be scrupulous, if there’s no need to confess my sins I don’t do it. The 1 to 2 times a week was just to explain that I regularly try to reconcile with God.
 
Thank you very much for your kind words 🙂 I’ll pray for you!
 
Go to adoration.

Go consistently until you receive the consolation of the Holy Spirit.

When that occurs, you will be changed.
 
mvilladefreitas said:
Is this normal? Has this ever happened to anyone? Please pray for me. I’ll pray for you.
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Yes this can be very normal. You are in my prayers and intentions.

One thing, has a Priest spoken with you about frequent confession?
 
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You’re over-doing. Jesus talks about rest as well, and not being anxious. There’s a limit to everything including seeking God and we have to remember that God wants the best for us, not to include mainly servile fear. Anyway I think anyone would wear themselves out with a relationship that doesn’t mean a comfortable and relaxed friendship along with deserved reverence and awe. Likewise frequent confessions can mean way too much fear; do you really offend God that much?
 
Hi! Thank you for your prayers. I think I might have given the wrong impression. I don’t literally visit confession one two to times a week. Whenever I feel like I’m not in state of receiving the Lord I confess my sins. But this depends. I usually confess before the Sunday Mass. I try not to be scrupulous since I know the dangers of it. I usually confess to the same priest all the time since it motivates me to not repeat the same old sins. He never told me anything about it 🙂 Praying for you as well 😉
 
DON’T stop! That’s the tactics of the enemy. St. Ignatius in his Spiritual Exercises:

1st Week, Rule 5: IN TIME OF DESOLATION NEVER MAKE A CHANGE.

1st Week, Rule 6: AGERE CONTRA - ACT AGAINST THE DESOLATION.

This explains the Rules of Discernment in the Spiritual Exercises: Rules For Discerning the Spirits - Angelus Press
 
Like everyone says, you’re doing the right things. I’d add to study apologetics, but you probably already do.

Perhaps consider that belief is not certainty - it has that element of faith which sometimes we have to hold onto for dear life.

Also, unless we have been called to a cloistered life, I do not think Jesus wants us to feel guilty or worried for not thinking of Him every second. He wants us to get on with the business of life which He created, and He knows that in doing so, we will not be directly thinking of Him every moment. But if we are serving His children (including ourselves) in good ways, whether those ways are routine or boring or relaxing or scary or fun, we are still showing Him love, even if we are not directly thinking of Him.

Finally, even He spent 40 days in the desert, so we can probably expect to spend more - which goes full circle to the faith thing (which none of us have the size of a mustard seed).

I’ve heard that love is an act of the will; perhaps faith is, too. And neither is a one-time act for us, dagnabbit!

Prayers. 😘
 
Don’t worry, it sounds like what you’re going through is normal. It’s also common in the lives of the saints as well. Desolation is more the norm than consolation and it’s the state of desolation and yes, even doubt that leads to a greater growth in the spiritual life. Just resolve to never give up regardless of what doubts and negative thoughts and feelings you may be enduring.

Some of the saints dealt with doubting things too, perhaps most famously St. Therese near the end of her life. All that matters is what we do with our will. In all the reading I’ve done I’m convinced that sometimes we just have to ignore how we feel. Feelings and thoughts can be influenced by so many factors, even something like the weather.

Feelings and thoughts often lie to us. Sometimes we just have to will belief and there’s growth and merit in that. We grow stronger when we push through these periods of doubt. Our faith develops deeper roots…Remember Mark 9:24: " I believe, help my unbelief!"

A book that helped me with this was Secrets of the Interior Life by Archbishop Luis Martinez.

Maybe you could also check out the book Eucharistic Miracles and Eucharistic Phenomena in the lives of the Saints by Joan Carroll Cruz to help you with your Eucharistic doubts.

God Bless!
 
Persevere to the end. The enemy is planting doubts on you, reject him at the threshold do not let him in. Many saints went through this, nothing new.
 
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