I have no relgion left

[seekdatruth]

You guys are hilarious! Yes, you are not alone in enjoying a good laugh. This is what I posted on the “Is Mormonism Christian Thread”(highly recommend staying away from it, it is a total waste) as an attempt to show what it would be like if Catholicism so easily accepted “revelations” such as what Joseph Smith and the LDS “prophets” claim to have had.

**BREAKING NEWS!!!
**
A lady in Wisconsin recently said she had a vision of the Virgin Mary who said, “Let them eat toast!” After the vision, the toast she had been making was left imprinted with the image of the Virgin Mary.

The pope did not comment but posed for this picture and handed it over to the press:
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3418/3231926536_a0dbb66832_o.jpg

Just kidding, Your Holiness!

 

[Bruno_Schulz]

**one should NEVER make silly jokes with things referring to God or Holy Mary.

It was worse enough to claim a toast showed the face of Holy Mary. No need to top it by suchlike faked pictures**

 

[seekdatruth]

Bruno,
You’re kidding, right?
I forgot, German and American humor are totally different.
Sheesh.

 

[seekdatruth]

A few years ago, an American woman noticed on her grilled-cheese sandwich what appeared to be the face of the Virgin Mary. She sold it on Ebay for $28,000. I don’t know what’s worse, who would sell it or who would buy it; but the Church, while saying that it’s believable that she had this little personal revelation and that’s is quiet possibly a miracle, was not about to go changing Catholic Church doctrine or dogma over it. You see, to me, that’s what Mormons did with Joseph Smith. IMO, what he came up with was way to silly to be taken seriously and form a whole new religion around it. Again, just my opinion. To me it’s as ridiculous as saying the Pope would do something like hold up toast with Virgin Mary imprinted on it, like it was a new symbol of the Church or something. The fact that we know nothing like this would REALLY happen is a funny thing to people. The Pope, His Holiness, would never just up and do such a thing over something so obviously silly. OK?
I hope he isn’t watching, since he is German too. Oh boy. I’m in the corner.

 

[michaelcollins]

A few years ago, an American woman noticed on her grilled-cheese sandwich what appeared to be the face of the Virgin Mary. She sold it on Ebay for $28,000. I don’t know what’s worse, who would sell it or who would buy it; but the Church, while saying that it’s believable that she had this little personal revelation and that’s is quiet possibly a miracle, was not about to go changing Catholic Church doctrine or dogma over it. You see, to me, that’s what Mormons did with Joseph Smith. IMO, what he came up with was way to silly to be taken seriously and form a whole new religion around it. Again, just my opinion. To me it’s as ridiculous as saying the Pope would do something like hold up toast with Virgin Mary imprinted on it, like it was a new symbol of the Church or something. The fact that we know nothing like this would REALLY happen is a funny thing to people. The Pope, His Holiness, would never just up and do such a thing over something so obviously silly. OK?
I hope he isn’t watching, since he is German too. Oh boy. I’m in the corner.

I understand your point your humor and think you are ok. the one disagreement that I have with our two German speaking friends is God has a wonderful sense of humor. strangely enough all my German clients have a grat sense of humor.

 

[Realcatholicgk]

I forgot, German and American humor are totally different. Sheesh.

I hope he isn’t watching, since he is German too. Oh boy. I’m in the corner.

**
Hi seek,

I am a German American. I also don’t think it was funny! :tsktsk: I am in the southwest portion of the USA. Me and the guys can hunt you down! Shhh, Don’t let bruno know I was laughing! **

 

[seekdatruth]

**
Hi seek,

I am a German American. I also don’t think it was funny! :tsktsk: I am in the southwest portion of the USA. Me and the guys can hunt you down! Shhh, Don’t let bruno know I was laughing! **

LOL! COme and get me!
Did I mention I like guns?

 

[Realcatholicgk]

LOL! COme and get me!
Did I mention I like guns?

**

hi Seek,

I like rifles and guns I own many, But I love high explosives. :bigyikes:

You are just luck the “Big Guy” said this:

“Humor is in fact an essential element in the mirth of creation. We can see how, in many matters in our lives, God wants to prod us into taking things a bit more lightly” - Pope Benedict XVI

God Bless
**

 

[seekdatruth]

**

hi Seek,

I like rifles and guns I own many, But I love high explosives. :bigyikes:

You are just luck the “Big Guy” said this:

“Humor is in fact an essential element in the mirth of creation. We can see how, in many matters in our lives, God wants to prod us into taking things a bit more lightly” - Pope Benedict XVI

God Bless
**

I knew I liked him!

 

[Bruno_Schulz]

Quote:
Originally Posted by michaelcollins:
“the one disagreement that I have with our two German speaking friends is God has a wonderful sense of humor. Strangely enough all my German clients have a great sense of humor.” End of quote.

---

**I’m afraid you and Seek misunderstood something.

I had over here a thread “DOES GOD HAVE HUMOUR?” Common answer was: “YES of course, but we really must differ!” Humour concerning holy things, even God Himself or Holy Mary, must remain devote. Everyday “pub-humour” is inappropriate; not suitable in any way to refere to the Holiest there is.

In fact we over here felt sorry, when we saw smilies in this CAF making the cross sign, praying etc. Such things simply are too holy and directly concerning God – can’t be taken fun of.

Jesus Himself must have had a lot of humour – else he wouldn’t have sustained us. Or take the wedding at Kana in John 2:7-11. It takes a lot of humour to transform water into wine. Jesus hardly would have eaten and drunk with most unpopular people (Lk 7,34) if He had no humour. But this is a loving humour. God who gave us our humour is love, and He gave it to us to use it in love.

Humour is only then humour, when it’s loving. Never when it pulls the leg of someone (or a third party) in a hurting way, or takes fun of holy things. So it’s just disgusting, when on carnivals people dress up as nuns, priests, bishops.

As Real pointed out: Yes God, (and of course Jesus who is God) does have humor; else God would not have given us any sense of humour. Believe in God lets us own and practise a relieving humour, that makes being a Christian joyful instead of as some atheists believe; burdensome. People without healthy, loving humour, hardly are able to have real faith in God.
**

 

[Realcatholicgk]

Quote:
Originally Posted by michaelcollins:
“the one disagreement that I have with our two German speaking friends is God has a wonderful sense of humor. Strangely enough all my German clients have a great sense of humor.” End of quote.

---

**I’m afraid you and Seek misunderstood something.

I had over here a thread “DOES GOD HAVE HUMOUR?” Common answer was: “YES of course, but we really must differ!” Humour concerning holy things, even God Himself or Holy Mary, must remain devote. Everyday “pub-humour” is inappropriate; not suitable in any way to refere to the Holiest there is.

In fact we over here felt sorry, when we saw smilies in this CAF making the cross sign, praying etc. Such things simply are too holy and directly concerning God – can’t be taken fun of.

Jesus Himself must have had a lot of humour – else he wouldn’t have sustained us. Or take the wedding at Kana in John 2:7-11. It takes a lot of humour to transform water into wine. Jesus hardly would have eaten and drunk with most unpopular people (Lk 7,34) if He had no humour. But this is a loving humour. God who gave us our humour is love, and He gave it to us to use it in love.

Humour is only then humour, when it’s loving. Never when it pulls the leg of someone (or a third party) in a hurting way, or takes fun of holy things. So it’s just disgusting, when on carnivals people dress up as nuns, priests, bishops.

As Real pointed out: Yes God, (and of course Jesus who is God) does have humor; else God would not have given us any sense of humour. Believe in God lets us own and practise a relieving humour, that makes being a Christian joyful instead of as some atheists believe; burdensome. People without healthy, loving humour, hardly are able to have real faith in God.
**

**Hi Bruno,

You may translate for them if you wish!

Mein lieber Freund, du sind dabei, meine Worte auf dem Glauben nehmen zu müssen! Sie haben sehr kleinen Sinn für Humor, wie Amerikaner tun. Erinnern Sie sich, dass Gott uns allen einen Sinn für Humor gab. Wir verwenden gerade our’s besser!

Now about Humor: This is the world’s oldest recorded joke–dating all the way back to 1900 B.C. The joke, told by the Sumerians, a people who lived in what is now southern Iraq in one of the earliest known civilizations of the world, was found inscribed on stone tablets. It went like this, according to researchers from Britain’s University of Wolverhampton:

“Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband’s lap.”

OK, maybe you had to be there.

**

 

[Bruno_Schulz]

**However; every breed of men or race, every country has it’s own humour. I know the British humour as quite mortal and queer; it’s more funny than ours though - still kind of blunt.
German humour differs a lot from the sea to the alps - but always subtle.
American humour… – well, St. Peter is instructed to let Americans in, even when they think that special US-sadness they spread and laugh about, is humour **

 

[Realcatholicgk]

**However; every breed of men or race, every country has it’s own humour. I know the British humour as quite mortal and queer; it’s more funny than ours though - still kind of blunt.
German humour differs a lot from the sea to the alps - but always subtle.
American humour… – well, St. Peter is instructed to let Americans in, even when they think that special US-sadness they spread and laugh about, is humour **

**Hi Bruno, :wave;

More American Humor

God’s Busy

A United States Marine was attending some college courses between assignments. He had completed missions in Iraq and Afghanistan . One of the courses had a professor who was an avowed atheist and a member of the ACLU .

One day the professor shocked the class when he came in he looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, ‘God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I’ll give you exactly 15 minutes.’ The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop.

Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, ‘Here I am God. I’m still waiting.’ It got down to the last couple of minutes when the Marine got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked him, knocking him off the platform. The professor was out cold.

The Marine went back to his seat and sat there, silently. The other students were shocked, stunned, and sat there looking on in silence. The professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the Marine and asked, ‘What the heck is the matter with you? Why did you do that?’

The Marine calmly replied, ‘God was too busy today protecting American soldiers who are protecting your right to say stupid stuff and act like an idiot. So, He sent me.’

And all God’s people said–AMEN!

Moral of story: If you don’t know GOD, don’t make stupid remarks!!!

They say this may be a true story. It made me laugh anyway!**

 

[Michael_David]

Hi Real, Like your God’s Busy story.

Two things are valid… we are to do God’s Will… as God works through all things, even some of us.

And the second, more tragic is that most of the GI’s coming back are having forms of PTS (Post Traumatic Stress). However, seems most pick-on those closest to them then on the likes of a professor. Our Vet Association is greatly lacking in the ways-and-means to handle the effects of PTS, so it ends up in the hands of the civilian population. I can see how this Marine could do something like that, but more often then not, it may be with his wife or kids, and not the professor.

Also note, I know a WWII vet that still feels the effects of PTS (after 60 years), but is learning to live ‘in spite’ of it. I too still feel it after 40 years, and can readily see it in those returning now.

It is the first of these two things that has helped me pull out of the rut. Thank God for all those people that are doing His Will.

 

[Bruno_Schulz]

**Thanks Michael. Very true and not only to war traumaticas as we all know.

That’s the great thing about believe, atheists don’t have. We can lay all PTS into the loving hands of God and still return to normal life (“still” in the sence of in spite as in the sence of quietly) as we are not allone. Never are allone!
That’s why, as pointed out in those last posts, humour of Christians and such of nonbelievers, differs very much.

Here are two real true things, that I myself found funny, at least I finally had a releasing laugh. RELEASING as to be a Christian is relief itself.
First one I told here already:

When last September I lay naked on this operation table for an other heart-catheter, I suddenly must laugh loudly. The professor and others asked; >why on earth do you laugh? All others are quite anxious in this admittedly awkward situation.<

So I told them the truth:

I just said to my guard-angel: “Here you are, that’s what we’ve got to go through as long as we are humans”<

The other funny laugh I had, concerns another, ever so holy theme - praying:

As every morning I walked the dog “Filou” in the wood near our house. Whilst doing so, I often intensively pray. Our favourite pastime is then; throwing a stick, me shouting
“BRING THE STICK FILOU!”
And the dog rushes after and brings it back. Now this time – whilst praying, I threw the stick and shouted: “BRING THE STICK DEAR GOD!”

Now that is not at all funny, and I was shocked and embarrassed that I had said such thing – even shouted such blasphemy. Thanks heavens no-one human heard it. God though, did. But then I remembered Gods love, and I’m sure God smiled at this and I had a relieved laugh too – surely heavens smiled at this too.

But don’t tell anybody

**

 

[Michael_David]

Ok Bruno, I’ll keep quiet… as you have already told the world.

“But don’t tell anybody”

I got a out of it.

PS: Yes there are other things that can cause PTS… No question about it. A Soldier is not the only one experiencing life and death situations in their life… we do know this.

 

[Bruno_Schulz]

**

Ok Bruno, I’ll keep quiet… as you have already told the world.

Oh - how wonderful it would be, if the world would read in this Forum CAF

I got a out of it

I really wonder if heavens sees this so too.
My murdered son Bjoern usually said to me:
Oh - for this - when you come up - you first get a good slap in your face! (He said it in other words, which aren’t transferable for it’s familiar character)

Yes there are other things that can cause PTS

Sure there are. Sadly enough plenty of them. Many break on these cases. For instance I know people who did break on the fact, that they had a down-child (years ago called mongoloid-children).

Now I have another friend who is really living in God. He had a healthy son, and then a down-child.
But he and his wife - as they “have God”, did not break on this fact, but they adopted another down-child and they love all three he and his wife have now, and keep sending me pictures of all they do with them.

Those are, as I mentioned before, the “holies (Saints)” among us here in everyday life!

If only nonbelievers would understand, that life with and in God is the outmost joy we can have here on earth – despite all and against all odds.

**

 

[po18guy]

You guys are hilarious! Yes, you are not alone in enjoying a good laugh. This is what I posted on the “Is Mormonism Christian Thread”(highly recommend staying away from it, it is a total waste) as an attempt to show what it would be like if Catholicism so easily accepted “revelations” such as what Joseph Smith and the LDS “prophets” claim to have had.

Just kidding, Your Holiness!

I have all but given up on them as well. I note that God sends multiple prophets, over multiple centuries. And, to the best of my knowledge, none of God’s prophets died shooting it out in a jail break.

Talk about faith. We should have so much as they do!

 

[michaelcollins]

Ha s anyone heard from IrishJoe, the one who started this thread? I have not heard from him since I posted about reading ck chesterton, cs lewis and the like and wonder if he had approached the catholic church through its modern intellectuals they helped me a lot in my time of doubt. since I posted on the above authors I have not heard from him or seen hoim on this thread.

 

[IrishJoe]

I’m still here but I think its gone a mile off topic to be honest. I dont find the intellectualism of any help. CK chetsterton I’ve not read, however I have recently read ‘the shack’ but found it cheesy.

CS Lewis I dont think his arguments for God are sound.