I have nothing to live for

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Sythix

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I wasn’t sure were to post this at but this looked like the closest place it would fit in.

I am a 15 year old guy who is very depressed and I feel like I have nothing to live for, please don’t post saying talk to a docter or something let me explain. Basically, I feel like I have nothing to live for in the future because I have a really hard time in school and I always hear work is alot harder and stressful, I already cant take anymore of school as it is so im worried. Also I am 99.99% sure I will not find the kind of wife I want when I grow up. I know you will say you never know and you are too young to be thinking of this but I am smarter then the average person and I know how bad this world is, I expect only suffering and unhappiness for the rest of my life which is why I feel like I have nothing to live for. Please help.
 
You’re right… life is very hard… work is hard… finding a suitable spouse is hard…

But it IS worth living through! This life isn’t meant to be easy! Christ didn’t promise earthly peace and happiness - quite the opposite!

That doesn’t mean you won’t find pleasures in life along the way - don’t sell yourself short. The (holy) pleasures of this world help keep us afloat - blessings that help us endure… we have to pray and be close to the Almighty to receive these graces while we’re here in this world.

Take a deep breath… okay, another one… you’re going through a rough time - please endure - please know that God has something MUCH better planned for you… He has blessings and graces that are ABUNDANT if you follow Him and take up your cross. I know it’s hard…

There are things you can do to help yourself manage in this world, though… if it means going out for a run in the sunshine to clear your thoughts - DO IT… if it means going to see a doctor - DO IT… THESE ARE blessings and graces that help us endure in this world.

(((HUGS)))… be at peace… please endure this time of suffering… it will not be for nothing.
 
I have a friend who was very much like you, in that she had no hope for anything, nor did she see any good in the world or humanity. In regards to school, perhaps you can enlighten us more about your exact situation? Perhaps classes you take, how the students and teachers treat you, etc? And, why do you say that you are 99.99% sure you won’t find the woman you want to be with?

We need to know more about your situation if you want advice, or words from the wise. But Christ does not; He knows fully your position. God is the one person who will not leave you. (Yes, I’m aware you’re most likely not in the mood for this talk, but it’s a talk that needs to be had nonetheless) Pray to Him, and He will not leave your prayers unanswered. If no one else can help you, then God will wipe away every tear.
 
I wasn’t sure were to post this at but this looked like the closest place it would fit in.

I am a 15 year old guy who is very depressed and I feel like I have nothing to live for, please don’t post saying talk to a docter or something let me explain. Basically, I feel like I have nothing to live for in the future because I have a really hard time in school and I always hear work is alot harder and stressful, I already cant take anymore of school as it is so im worried. Also I am 99.99% sure I will not find the kind of wife I want when I grow up. I know you will say you never know and you are too young to be thinking of this but I am smarter then the average person and I know how bad this world is, I expect only suffering and unhappiness for the rest of my life which is why I feel like I have nothing to live for. Please help.
Okay… I want to add a couple more things before I leave your thread. 🙂

WHO is it telling you “work is a lot harder and stressful than school”? What in particular at school is challenging you? Be honest… I’ve been there. 🙂

WHAT is the “kind of wife that YOU WANT”? Have you considered making this a prayer? Ask God to bring you to the wife that HE wants you to be with. Also, PRAY for this girl - she may be struggling herself - pray that she endures along with you - despite the fact that you may have not even met.
 
Probably quite a few Saints would berate you for this thinking! We live for Christ - that is why we are here. To love and serve the Lord.

At least, in theory. But we aren’t all Saints. But despair is actually a sin in some cases. It shows seperation from God. During this time fill every gaping hole in your heart with the Lord and Jesus will give you peace. It wont be painless and it wont be easy though.

If its any consolation I know what you are going through (and I am sure most people here do too!). I live alone and attend college, I have lost most friends because I took my faith more seriously, I lost my long term girlfriend because of it too, I have no family in the country, and the family I do have I see once a year for a week or two. I go to my seminars, I come home and sleep. Church, working out, studying and praying fill in the gaps. Other than that. I too, have nothing really. But I know peace. For the most part. Because God has something in store for me - words which sometimes sound too good to be true and I have trouble believing myself. There are times when I feel hopeless. When I realise for an entire week I haven’t spoken a single word to anyone.

But what would my alternative be? A fat, lazy immoral drunkard failing college and getting involved in all kinds of sinful things with all kinds of sinful people.

God loves you, God loves me. Suffering is something we should treasure in some sense, because it brings us closer to God and we can learn something about how he suffered too! And then (this is what I look forward to most :D) in a few years looking back we can say “WOW… I survived that miserable hopeless time” and we can smile. Knowing we did it, knowing God was there, knowing that giving up would’ve been stupid considering what you have now! But be patient, God will provide.

As the above poster said, life is characterized by suffering in some sense. Throughout life. But it isn’t impossible to be happy and to be at peace. Pray and Pray some more. Discern what God wants from you!

Hope this helps; its nice to know other people are hopeless too 😛
 
Don’t think that you don’t have anything to live for. For one thing you are alive to talk to us. We love you.

For myself, I don’t care where you come from or what you have been through or what you have put people through. I care and love you. I know that so many here have helped me. Don’t turn away from this forum because there are people here who will help you as best we can.
 
Sorry, I didnt post many details because I wanted to get to the point instead of having people read a giant wall of text, Anyway, I really hate school Because most of the people there are total jerks and I really hate them. And school takes up all day long and if i wasnt in school i could be doing better things. And the reason I say I dont think I will find a wife is because this world is full of bad people and a quality I am looking for is pretty rare these days: being a virgin until married. Other than that my family is loving and kind I am very thankful for them bringing me up the right way. But yeah I dont know if its just hard for a good kid to grow up in a bad world or what its just after school is over and I have a job and nothing is fun anymore I wont find enjoyment in life.
 
Ask yourself: why do you think God created you? I’m going to put this out there: God made you. It was a conscious active act, not something he sat by and “allowed” to happen. He did it, if he didn’t, you wouldn’t be here asking these questions.

Well, we know why God made us: so that we might know and love him and be happy with him in eternity (heaven). God is Love, and when we are face to face with that pure unrestricted Love, there can be no such thing as suffering.

Ok, that’s great, life will be perfect after we die, right? What about now?

Well, God is just as much Love now as he will be when we die, right? Because God is unchanging and eternal. So, if God wants us to be happy with him in eternity, why would he want us to be unhappy here on earth?

The answer to that, quite simply, is he doesn’t. He didn’t create you to be miserable. He didn’t create you to be lonely, isolated, and unfulfilled. He created you in his image: Love. To give love totally (to the extent that our human nature is capable), and in giving love to receive it.

Now let me ask you something else. When you have trouble, where is God in your life? Where do you see him, where do you perceive him, and most importantly, where do you want him? I’ll tell you a secret I learned just recently: stuff is hard when he’s not helping out. I can be doing the simplest thing in the world, something I’ve done a thousand times, and have trouble, or something I’ve never done before, and just as much struggle, when I try to do it by myself. I’m a grown man, fairly intelligent (supposedly), physically able. I should be able to do it myself. But I’ll tell you, it’s all a thousand times, a million times easier when I stop and say, “God, everything in creation is yours. Please help me.” And he does!

The truth is, we are imperfect, and incomplete. We are created for union in love. When we try to get by on our own merits, we fall short, because we can’t complete ourselves: only the love of God through Jesus Christ can complete us.

Yes life is hard, and sometimes, it just plain sucks. Really. You’re old enough to ask these questions, so there’s no reason to sugar-coat the truth, and tell you that life is going to be daisies and fluffy bunnies from here until eternity. But I am 100% serious when I say life is easier when God is at the helm. “God, I’ll pedal, you steer,” is an expression I heard some months ago. It is quite apt.

Paul realized the value of this. He knew that life is hard, and sometimes painful. Now while he was writing this specifically about persecutions of the faith, it applies to everyday life as well:
Therefore, that I might not become too elated, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, an angel of satan, to beat me, to keep me from being too elated. Three times I begged the Lord about this, that it might leave me, but he said, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” I will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me. Therefore, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and constraints for the sake of Christ; for when I am weak, then I am strong" (2Cor 12:7b-10).
I’m not trying to sermonize at all. But my advice would be to really spend some serious time in prayer. Every day. I mean it. It’s going to feel pointless, it’s going to feel like nothing is happening. But by the very act of stopping to pray, you begin to open yourself up more to the workings of the Spirit. Ask him for help, and ask him to give you the strength and the courage to keep going when it all seems pointless.

Remember that Jesus knew that his death was not going to change our sinful nature, and that large numbers of people were still going to choose to reject God and be lost. But still he mounted the cross, out of love for you.

–Love
 
I absolutely hated school from about middle school on. I think sometimes adults forget how tough it is for kids that hate school. You are required to attend, and it consumes so much of your young life. It feels like an unending prison sentence.

I found the workforce to be so much more satisfying than school. I choose to go to work each day. My employer pays me for coming. I have some flexibility in my hours, and I can schedule my own vactions. True, there is not as much time off overall, and the days are longer, but I rarely have “homework”. I leave work at the office when I go home.

It was tough for me, but I managed to make it through school, including a bachelor’s degree in electrical engineering. (And I live to tell the tale!) I think for some people school is a lot easier than the workforce, but the opposite was true for me. If school is truly miserable for you, a job will almost certainly be better. Try to think of your schooling as a means to prepare for life without school. A degree is no guarantee for a job, but you can learn a lot from books and teachers, and you can also learn how to meet another person’s expectations (very helpful in any job).

Hang in there, and remember, school really is not a life sentence. Your “permanent record” is not all that permanent. Once you get started in your first job in a career, your GPA will be much less relevant to future employers. They will be most interested in your job performance.

Also, try not to waste your efforts worrying about things you cannot change. Just do the best you can, and focus on the positive.
 
I have a really hard time in school and I always hear work is alot harder and stressful
I would greatly disagree with this. I don’t know anything about your course of study, but even school gets easier as you go along…at least until you change schools. Took me awhile in high school to “get good at it”, but I did. College was like being dropped into a cauldron at first, but then I got a lot better at it by even junior year. Graduate school was beyond horrible until toward the end.

And work is easier than any of it. Well, at first, when you don’t know what you’re doing, it’s hard. But it gets easier and easier with time, because you get good at it, and you don’t get re-introduced to a new, harder situation every four years.

It even got easier and easier with girls. But you “start over” with that too when you’re in school. By the time you’re about ready to get out for the last time, you’re just what most girls are looking for; even the ones who wouldn’t give a cup of warm spit for a freshman or a sophomore.

I don’t know what to tell you about that except that you just need to believe me that it’s true.
 
I wish I hadn’t replied to this thread. I meant well but didn’t read properly. Life IS hard.
 
Your public profile doesn’t say where you are from. I’m not sure it matters. I have a neighbor who was having a very difficult time in school - foster child, was moved around a lot, had trouble making friends, etc. Our neighbors did adopt her. They enrolled her in a small Christian school, which she liked. After 2 years there, the school closed. She finished her schooling at home online and graduates this year. She already is able to work part-time. You might check with your counselors at school to see what is available.

As for the rest… It seems you need to look at what you feel you are good and successful at. What do you enjoy doing? There must be some positives in your life. It sounds like your family may be supportive of you. Do they know you feel like this?? A wife - plenty of time for that!! You will find relationships with others go better when you come to feel better about yourself. Are there youth activities at your church? Are you comfortable talking with your priest? Do something you can find rewarding - help a neighbor, volunteer at a soup kitchen, tutor a younger student, Habitat for Humanity, etc. I wouldn’t make pay a priority. Find something you can do for someone else that makes you feel good about you. Pray about it.

God loves you and has a plan for you. Have you asked Him for help? You won’t find the answer on a billboard (probably!), but in the quiet of your heart. The quote from St. Augustine has helped me - “Our heart is restless until it rests in You.”

I will keep you in my prayers.

God bless,
Linda
 
And the reason I say I dont think I will find a wife is because this world is full of bad people and a quality I am looking for is pretty rare these days: being a virgin until married.
I actually went through a rough time myself (school was also part of it). I actually did what I called “launching a spiritual counter-offensive.” One of the ways I did this was to learn what I value and set my time to those values. If you are able to scratch out the time (and are willing), one book which was key for me doing this was “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” by Covey.
When I was having my problems, I felt similarly to you. One thing which helped a lot is what I call “sanity time.” Do something which gives you emotional and spiritual strength. These can include reading Scripture (a form of this is praying the Liturgy of the Hours, listening to music with a supportive message. I’ve included a link to the “Hours” in case you are willing to try it. It is a software package which will can help you get started.
Lastly, find get around people who care about you and hang out with them. Also a form of that is look for other people that are taking grief from the jerks. Pray for the strength to be an encouragement to others in the same situation as you. Pray for the conversion of the jerks. Pray for the softening of their hearts.
 
I won’t say I know how you feel, because I don’t. But, my Friend, you have EVERYTHING to live for. I have a feeling that you are being tempted by the Devil, with these thoughts. I know school can be hard, but God will NEVER EVER give us anything that we can not handle. The Lord promised us happiness not on earth, but in Heaven.
My friend, lets hope that when you die you will have a casked made of a 100 year old oak…let us plant that oak tree tomorrow.
 
Sorry, I didnt post many details because I wanted to get to the point instead of having people read a giant wall of text, Anyway, I really hate school Because most of the people there are total jerks and I really hate them. And school takes up all day long and if i wasnt in school i could be doing better things. And the reason I say I dont think I will find a wife is because this world is full of bad people and a quality I am looking for is pretty rare these days: being a virgin until married. Other than that my family is loving and kind I am very thankful for them bringing me up the right way. But yeah I dont know if its just hard for a good kid to grow up in a bad world or what its just after school is over and I have a job and nothing is fun anymore I wont find enjoyment in life.
Well, a couple of thoughts come to mind. First of all, quit hating. If you want to be unhappy in life, hating others is a sure fire formula. Secondly, what could you be doing better than school? Playing video gams, watching TV?? Sloth will make you unhappy and depressed. Third, why do you picture having a job and having to work for a living as such a bad thing? Work has dignity, this dignity often leads to happiness. I know a lot of people who complain about going to work on Monday morning, but really wouldn’t want it any other way. Finally, don’t be so cynical about everyone else in this world. We are all God’s children and most people have more good in them than bad.

You 15, learn to be happy and enjoy life. Spend time with people who know how to do so.
 
Have you ever looked at your life from a different point of view…of how lucky you are.
I mean you are healthy (i guess) & you live in a stable home with good parents.My goodness
the amount of children who live in broken homes with separated parents who feel insecure & are hurting.
We used to foster 2 sisters.When they arrived they were 9 and 15yrs old.Their mother had just died.Life was (& still is) tough for them they were in a great deal of pain.My first2 children died as babies,how I would love to have them here in my life.I am very lucky and blessed by Our Lord that despite my sinful life I have three sons and three grandsons.How lucky I am.

Life is what you make it.If you want a relationship with Our Lord start talking to Him throughout your day in your mind.Pray,tell him you want to feel Him in Your life.Ask for guidance.

God loves YOU,He loves each and every one of His children.

Luke 12:7
Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows.

Philippians 4:6
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

1 Peter 5:7
Casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.

God is the Creator of the universe who yearns for us to know Him. That is why we are all here. It is His desire that we rely on and experience His strength, love, justice, holiness and compassion. So He says to all who are willing, “Come to Me.”

He knows what will happen in the world. More importantly, He knows what will occur in your life and can be there for you, if you’ve chosen to include Him in your life. He tells us that He can be “our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in times of trouble.” But we must make a sincere effort to seek Him. He says, “you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.”

May God bless you and be with you my friend
 
I wasn’t sure were to post this at but this looked like the closest place it would fit in.

I am a 15 year old guy who is very depressed and I feel like I have nothing to live for, please don’t post saying talk to a docter or something let me explain. Basically, I feel like I have nothing to live for in the future because I have a really hard time in school and I always hear work is alot harder and stressful, I already cant take anymore of school as it is so im worried. Also I am 99.99% sure I will not find the kind of wife I want when I grow up. I know you will say you never know and you are too young to be thinking of this but I am smarter then the average person and I know how bad this world is, I expect only suffering and unhappiness for the rest of my life which is why I feel like I have nothing to live for. Please help.
If you have trouble with academics, there are many jobs that are not academic. Do you enjoy working with your hands? Do you enjoy working outdoors? Do you enjoy working with people?

Not everyone is cut out for intellectual work, and there are plenty of decent jobs that don’t require you to do that.

In your other post you mentioned people at school being jerks, so if that is your issue, then the adult world certainly is very different. I have never experienced adults picking on other adults, and former geeks are the successful professionals.

I know also you said not to mention doctors, but that you’re so worried about stress and see only suffering and unhappiness is something you should talk about. It’s not uncommon for teenagers to feel this way, and could be in part because of your hormones. If you’re opposed to doctors in general, even things like working out, sleeping well, and eating well can make a big difference in your mental health.
 
Hey, I get it, life really is hard sometimes.

Is there anything you are interested in or really like to do? I would concentrate on those things. I don’t reccommend leaving school but a lot of successful people never finish school or go to college. Sometimes you can make a living just doing what you love.

The more confidence you *pretend *to have the more the ladies will be attracted to you. Be kind, honest, loving and confident, prayerful and you will find a good person to be with.

Above all, take a break from reading the news, that alone can be depressing. Try to take some time to help others, maybe visit the elderly and not spend so much time dwelling on yourself. Sometimes if you just live life and try to do the right thing, good things come to you.

God Bless and take it easy on yourself nobody is perfect.🙂
 
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