I need opinions ASAP! Help!

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Princess_Abby:
Well, my baby sister gave me a good ‘talking to’ yesterday and helped me decide to stop worrying about family members and technicalities and all of that, and to just be excited and appreciate the shower. (Sometimes I can’t believe she’s only 18, she has quite the voice of reason sometimes.) She was like, “stop letting Mom’s issues indirectly dictate your fun!” Ooooooookay then!

Soooo thanks for the encouragement from all of you, too!

It’s set for March 4th, before the baby comes, which is probably better because my friend asked how comfortable I would feel about nursing a brand-new baby with tons of people around and passing her everywhere, especially since new babies are rarely on schedules and it would be hard to predict.
When she’s a few months old, or maybe at her baptism, we’ll introduce everyone to her.
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I still remember a quote from my high school civics teacher:
“Don’t let someone else ruin your day.” How true!

I’m sure you are going to have a wonderful shower with your friends.

Blessings to you and your ever growing family!
 
I say apologize to your hubby as your hormones got the best of you, along with some misguided thinking that was comfuzed due to those hormones! 😉 Seeing how your friends probably knew of the situation with your mother, and obviously your DH knows of the situation… they’re all just trying to give you something that would make you feel better AND it’s a traditional thing.

My girlfriends threw me a baby shower for my third baby and my DH was in on it. He was also in on the first one. I didn’t have a baby shower for DD2. He didn’t ask any of them, but my friends did come to him to ask what we needed (come on, you don’t want a new mom to get 50 baby books, do ya? 😛 )

Enjoy!!! And don’t worry about your mama either not being invited, not coming, whatever… it’s YOUR party, it’s yours and your husbands’ baby… don’t let her ruin this wonderful occassion!
 
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Princess_Abby:
You’re off base, OTM. My embarrassment is exactly what Island Oak detailed–that my husband, who will directly benefit by me receiving items we’ll use for the baby, basically asked my friends to throw a shower and therefore buy us gifts. It has nothing to do with my mentally ill ‘mommy-dearest.’ I think you missed my point entirely.

But to the rest of you–thanks for making me laugh and thanks for the (name removed by moderator)ut! 🙂
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No, I didn’t miss it. I tried to be polite in my answer.

Let me try it another way: years ago a rather matronly woman took my mother to task, and rather bluntly. Neither my mother nor I have ever forgoten the lesson, which is this: if someone offers you something, they do so because they want you to have it. There is only one polite response, and that is to accept what is offered, and accept it graciously.

That your husband will benefit is absolutely irrelevant - he would have benefitted had your mother continued through with her plan for a baby shower. So what? He didn’t go out and ask your friends for a shower so he could benefit; he asked them to give you a shower because you obviously were hurt and upset about the one canceled. To presume otherwise is beyond ridiculous; it borders on trying to find a conspiracy of evil in completely good acts.

Having read your comments, all I can see is a combination of pity party and a rejection of something nice your friends are trying to do for you. let it go and enjoy the party. And thank God you have a husband who would put common sense and care for his wife over some presumed issue of ettiquette.
 
Accept the baby shower. It doesn’t matter who initiated it!! Your friends and your husband love you and want to do this for you and for the baby! Sit back and enjoy what every new mother should have! It’s a glorious event, bringing life into the world…and a baby shower gives you the opportunity to celebrate life with family and friends.

Thank God your husband had the sense to tell your friends!! You knew why your mother cancelled, but I’m sure the invitees had no idea. They may have thought you didn’t want one, or there was some health problem etc. So, your husband went to bat for you…good for him! That’s his job!

Congratulations!!!

:blessyou:
 
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SMHW:
Accept the shower. Your husband wants it for you. Your friends want it for you.

Be gracious.

You probably are. But it’s perfectly acceptable given you are pregnant. 😉 It’s good practice for the insanity that your kids will cause you when they get older.
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AMEN! Enjoy the shower.
 
I only read your post Abbey, and we don’t ‘do’ those showers here in Britain so I don’t understand the whole concept: BUT your dh and your friends want to give you that shower: be happy they care so much! Enjoy it!!!

Anna x
 
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otm:
No, I didn’t miss it. I tried to be polite in my answer.

Let me try it another way…Having read your comments, all I can see is a combination of pity party and a rejection of something nice your friends are trying to do for you…
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Youch! I think I liked the “polite” answer better. This one was a bit prickly given the subject matter…
 
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