I'm a gay guy. Should I marry a woman?

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Y’all can question if I’m being “loving” or not. It’s fine if you don’t think it’s fair to the hypothetical woman in question.

That’s valid. I agree that it’s definitely a tricky question.

But two things: (1) I’m not merely using the woman for sake of loneliness. Rather, it would be a marriage that simply does not have the full, normal sexual attraction. (Besides, are ALL marriages between members who are always sexually attracted)

and (2): I’m in NO way saying that I would be hiding my SSA from her. Said hypothetical woman would know about it. Assume SHE is open to it.

I’m asking if this marriage would make sense for someone like me.
 
BUT knowing this would the Catholic Church allow this marriage to take place, probably not. Remember there has to be complete openness on both sides in marriage.
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Why not? Since when is having SSA an impediment to marriage?
 
Why would you rob a woman of the fullness of a conjugal union?

Not an act of love.
 
Also I imagine the straight spouse could face some serious temptation if they later met a nice member of the opposite sex who (reasonably appropriately) demonstrated that they were attracted to them.
 
Have you contacted courage? They are really helpful with questions like these.
 
I’m not going to go down this road anymore.

Like I have said over and over again, we are assuming this very hypothetical** woman is OPEN to the marriage and that she KNOWS about my SSA.

It wouldn’t be “forced or fake or a lie.” I’m afraid you have a very modern Western understanding of marriage as simply a romance.
 
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Our desires for the other should be unencumbered for the other we marry.

If a hetero has a thing for a past fling…he must detach from that fling and give his whole heart to his wife.

You’re trying to create some artificial world, an artificial case to prop up what you admit is an act of selfishness.
 
I don’t think any of us can give you a dogmatic answer about this. If you truly would like to have a marriage and family, then really get on your knees and start praying about it. Ask God to send you that one special woman that you COULD fall in love with and be attracted to. God could do this if He chose…I’m not going to say there’s no way it could ever happen. Are you being open to the possibility and going out and meeting women? I’d probably suggest making friends with women and maybe it could lead to romance, but you would need to be upfront and honest about it with her.

Consecrate yourself to the Holy Family and be open to God’s plan for you. If God wills for you to be celibate, then give Him thanks and pray for chastity and contentment. If He sends you a wife, praise Him for that, too. But definitely don’t deceive a woman and marry her without being attracted to her.

Love is more than sexual attraction, but more important is trust and honesty. Hope that helps a little. Keep praying, and put Jesus at the absolute center of your life, and it will work out according to His good plan.
 
Why would you rob a woman of the fullness of a conjugal union?

Not an act of love.
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Not to sound whiny, but I’m still curious why most replies are still looking from the hypothetical perspective of the woman and not really at all addressing my own concerns, or the reasons that prompted me to ask this question.

BUT also: “fullness of conjugal love” What even is this? Does ANY couple possess a “fullness”? What does a “fullness” require? Is the mere sexual act sufficient? No? Then do tell. Is it sexual attraction? To what extent?
 
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Ummm, probably not. It is possible to live without someone.

Don’t worry though. No one wants to be alone. Ultimately, the only thing that can fill this void is God.
 
Not at all.

The “Western model” for marriage is the life of Jesus Christ, ending on the Cross, with a resurrection.

That’s our model.

Total kenosis, total self-gift for the greatest and highest good of the other.

Your understanding of marriage is the modern western understanding…one of legalities, rights, reciprocities.

Love seeks no rights it seeks to serve as a Saint said.
 
I prefer the more sensitive responses like that of @ShowersofRoses than this @Edward_H.

So very kind of you, Edward. Goodness gracious.
 
Let’s stop addressing your concerns…and start addressing the concerns of your “targets”…the women you want to “hypothetically” hoodwink into a non-marriage.
 
catholic1seeks said:
I have ZIP/ZERO sexual attraction to women. But since I don’t want to be lonely, and since I like the idea of family, and since I find the idea of forsaking sexual relations (in general) to be VERY burdensome, should I ATTEMPT MARRIAGE WITH A WOMAN??
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If I make ask, why enter into the covenant of marriage if you are not attracted to women sexually?
 
Kindness isn’t hoodwinking a woman into a non-marriage.

Let’s raise our understanding of “kindness” to something resembling the Cross.
 
No, don’t marry a woman. You need to find ways to deal with your loneliness, not put it onto another person to deal with it for you.
 
This must be a very heavy cross to bear and I’m sorry that you’re saddled with it, but this strikes me as a monstrously unfair thing to do to the woman.
 
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