I feel so bad. I gave up alcohol for Lent because I thought perhaps I had been relying on drink too much-- I’m a mother of 4 very young children, and I homeschool, and I have been babysitting my 4 month old nephew for free 4 days a week. I’m so stressed!! I really don’t drink THAT much, but a glass or 2 of wine in the evening really helps me unwind. I had gotten to the point of drinking a couple glasses of wine probably 3-4 times a week, and I just felt like I was relying on it too much. So I gave it up for Lent. I drank some wine a couple of times on Sundays at the beginning, since I’ve heard and read that Sundays are “free days” during Lent. Then… I drank on a Saturday night. Then… I had some leftover wine on Monday, so I drank a couple of glasses on Monday. I feel like a big loser! I also thought I would try to cut back on sweets… and then as a family we decided to give up eating out at restaurants to save money for almsgiving. Same thing. Little by little-- we ended up just eating out as much as always!!
Am I the only one who has done this?
No you will not be alone in this.
I honestly don’t think that it is important that you had the drink when you made an intentional effort to give it up for Lent. What I think is important is that you intended to give it up and had every good intention of doing that.
I believe that God looks at the intent and the love in the heart more than He looks at the outcome or a set of rules and laws. I am not knocking the Laws of the Church and we all profess to believe in them and believe in them we do, but we are also all sinners and we all break the laws in some way, shape or form.
You had a good intent; you still do.
Here’s what I did, I knew that I would have difficulty in giving two things up, one being chocolate and the other being wine. I know I am weak and I know I need God’s grace to do all things. So I decided this Lent to give up chocolate, which is a biggy for me, I find it comforting at certain times of the month if you know what I mean!
. I didn’t want to not endure so I gave up chocolate bars. So far so good, but in giving up chocolate bars I didn’t feel the pressure not have any chocolate at all. The reason I am telling you all this is that because I made a narrow margin of error I have left the option of having a little chocolate on sweets and perhaps on a buscuit, but it has strengthened my will to mostly go without chocolate at all.
We all like to think big and think we can do a great big thing for God, when actually we cannot do anything great at all. So make it simple and you will find you can do more. Decide not to have a drink for five days a week and on the other two limit what you do have, this will be your Lenten promise, you will find this workable and you may even find you do more than this. The pressure of Lent can get to us so don’t make any pressure!
Afterall who are we trying to impress with big goals? ourselves? God? others? No-one is impressed, but in the secret of our hearts between God and ourselves the love of God within the intention is what God finds impressive and loves.
This will make you laugh:
My mother gave up drinking
inside the house one year for Lent. I looked outside late one evening and saw the outside light on. I went outside to look and found my mother standing in her night wear with an umberella up drinking a glass of wine stood ‘outside’ of the house in the pouring rain! My mother is a moderate drinker, very measured in all things. I laughed myself silly at her and I am sure Jesus raised a smile at that one!
Don’t be hard on yourself. See the humour in it and realise that God knows all the workload you have and that you need to relax.
I honestly thought that on Easter Sunday I’d buy a family bar of chocolate and eat the lot to myself, but after this small attempt I am glad I have cut back on chocolate and will hope to keep cutback on it for good by God’s grace and that is what Lent is about; preparation and change.
I think it is far more important to do more than to give things up. You already do a great deal to please God in your care and love of those beautiful children, perhaps for something extra make a little special time for you and your husband…like the saying goes ‘Emphasise the positives, minimise the negatives’ Change the way you view yourself and this will give you more confidence.
You sound to me to be lovely.
The love of Jesus to you and your family.
Learn the lesson, think about the influence of alcohol in your life if you see a problem, try again. 