I figured I’d offer you some (what I hope is) practical advice, as one who has gone through aspects of this issue. Please understand that when I write ‘you’, I’m not meaning you personally, in fact I’m generally meaning me, but it’s just the way I think and write… as though I’m teaching somebody else. Some of this info may not even be relevant to you personally.
1 Corinthians 10:13 None of the trials which have come upon you is more than a human being can stand. You can trust that God will not let you be put to the test beyond your strength, but with any trial will also provide a way out by enabling you to put up with it.
This verse was a major lightbulb moment for me and had a huge impact on my life. It’s basically saying that regardless of the temptation, I can withstand it… it’s within me already to withstand it, if I trust in God. I’ll always be able to avoid the sin in one way or another. That’s a very powerful thought.
With masturbation, there’s a trigger… at least in my case. Whether you see a person that arouses you, or hear something, or whether you’re watching a movie, or watching porn etc. Sometimes even our own thoughts can arouse us.
I notice also that there’s a point of no return when it comes to masturbation, and if you allow yourself to get to that point, nothing can stop you. The trick is not to let yourself get beyond the initial arousal stage. Nip it in the bud straight away. The other issue with masturbation, and porn, is that you have to
want to give it up. There’s pleasure involved in masturbation and porn, and so it’s not an easy thing to want to give up. In my case I want to do God’s will and I truly detest my sin, I place God above the temporary pleasure/release… and the remorse that eventually follows (sometimes not an instant remorse either). It’s been too easy in the past to put God out of mind and to carry on with sinning because we like it, but eventually we get called back and by then we’re weighed down with sin. It can be a vicious circle if you let it be. We have to choose once and for all to do God’s will and overcome our sinful ways.
Now, going back to that verse. I have it in me already to withstand any temptation… I really just have to try, and keep trying. Do whatever it takes. I did fail a few times initially but I’m fairly successful now. I think that the more often you overcome the temptation, the easier it gets.
Basically we have to avoid the triggers too. At the first moment of arousal… get away from the trigger. If it’s in your thoughts, watch the news or something… there’s nothing arousing on the news, at least for me. If it’s someone you’ve seen, go for a 10 minute walk, start praying etc. If you have to, go for another walk… seriously, it’s a matter of getting out of the situation at the first sign of trouble and doing whatever it takes to get over it. Distractions. Keeping your hands off helps too. I knew I had it in me because I absolutely and without doubt believed that bible verse.
Regarding prayers… praying for chastity is praying specifically for what you need. I think there’s sometimes a gap in our lives too… an emotional need that needs filling, so it would probably be a good idea to think about making some new friendships as that would be beneficial too, as we’re not meant to be solitary beings. I feel there’s more I could say but I can’t seem to think of anything else right now. Anyway, this is all very personal so I hope you can find something useful in this.
