Infertility

[LovingHim]

Revert- I just joined the site, too, and saw the novena back in September. Actually my DH found it for me and printed it out for us to begin. We ended the novena on Sunday, Dec.9th. December 23rd we found out we are finally pregnant after 21 cycles. This is my fifth cycle on clomid, second cycle on 100mg. This month we went to confession to begin the advent season, did the novena and abstained (well, not TOTally) from O until 12DPO. I tested on 13DPO and got a positive. I am still in complete disbelief!!! When I look back at my chart for this month, we conceived on Sunday, Dec. 9th, the last day of the novena. If you read the novena prayer, it states “do not let me end this novena without having experienced in some way the effects of your intercession.” How’s that for a sign???

I’d say that was a definite sign! How wonderful! Praise Jesus! Prayers for a healthy full term pregnancy and a safe delivery.

 

[Cagrl]

Revert- I just joined the site, too, and saw the novena back in September. Actually my DH found it for me and printed it out for us to begin. We ended the novena on Sunday, Dec.9th. December 23rd we found out we are finally pregnant after 21 cycles. This is my fifth cycle on clomid, second cycle on 100mg. This month we went to confession to begin the advent season, did the novena and abstained (well, not TOTally) from O until 12DPO. I tested on 13DPO and got a positive. I am still in complete disbelief!!! When I look back at my chart for this month, we conceived on Sunday, Dec. 9th, the last day of the novena. If you read the novena prayer, it states “do not let me end this novena without having experienced in some way the effects of your intercession.” How’s that for a sign???

WOW!!! That is truly INCREDIBLY AWESOME!!! PRAISE OUR LORD and MAMA MARY!!! YAY! Congratulations!

 

[stadre]

When we didn’t conceive over Christmas while DH was home for R&R, we decided we were ready to attack this on two fronts. I am spending this month and next working on my meds so that we can try again this spring when I join him in Asia for a couple of months. My other job was to start the paperwork for adoption. I have a meeting to attend on Thursday, but the woman I spoke to told me that not only will we have to wait a long time to take the classes but we cannot even start the paperwork until then. (A class starts in March–obviously out of the question and the next one isn’t until September. They don’t have any on the weekends and DH will not be home during the week until mid October.) How disheartening to realize that adoption doesn’t seem to be part of the plan for our family. Maybe we really are meant to only have 1 child.

 

[aurora77]

Stadre, that is disappointing. It’s tough when something seems like it’s God’s will, but doesn’t turn out that way.

We’re kind of feeling the same way. We’ve completed our foster classes and are almost done with the paperwork, but are really feeling like the foster-adopt thing isn’t for us. We’re just not comfortable being “mentors” to birth parents, dealing with visits with b-parents. Many questions were asked about our openness to having visits in our home (yeah right! I don’t think so). They really stress having an open relationship, even after adoption. We’re going to see this through and get our license, so we at least have the home study done. After that, we’ll have to decide what to do.

I just want to be a mom, you know? I thought this was the right path, but now I’m thinking it’s not. Now I don’t know what we’re going to do next. Lots of praying, I suspect.

 

[stadre]

Stadre, that is disappointing. It’s tough when something seems like it’s God’s will, but doesn’t turn out that way.

We’re kind of feeling the same way. We’ve completed our foster classes and are almost done with the paperwork, but are really feeling like the foster-adopt thing isn’t for us. We’re just not comfortable being “mentors” to birth parents, dealing with visits with b-parents. Many questions were asked about our openness to having visits in our home (yeah right! I don’t think so). They really stress having an open relationship, even after adoption. We’re going to see this through and get our license, so we at least have the home study done. After that, we’ll have to decide what to do.

Aurora, I do remember that feeling when we started the process years ago in another state. It was definitely not the right time for us. It is good that you are seeing the process through to the end. If you don’t have the license, there is nothing you can do. If you do, you will be open to whatever Our Father has for you. I just wish I could say the same since I just have no idea about these classes. Will the first available be next March? Will my husband be able to be at all 9 classes? (It seems like a pretty big stretch to have him home! ) I guess we will all have to wait and see.

It is hard to realize that there are many benefits to having just one child–and they are all the same reasons we, as Catholics, might suggest to couples that maybe they consider being open to another child (the travelling and other costly opportunities we can do which we wouldn’t if we had a larger family). I guess it is OK to feel that way since we have been and continue to not only be open but actively working to add.

I just want to be a mom, you know? I thought this was the right path, but now I’m thinking it’s not. Now I don’t know what we’re going to do next. Lots of praying, I suspect.

You sound like you were born to be a mother. Please keep us posted as you finish this part of your journey.

Please, God, bless this woman and her husband with children to raise for you. Amen

 

[Revert97]

Ladies,

I too was recently dissapointed, as I thought we might have conceived in time for our 3rd wedding anniv. on feast of St Therese; insteead, patients of mine, who were for health reasons, abstaining from having their 3rd, are due on our anniversary. My prayers are with you - and my empathy too. God Bless.

 

[Teakafrog]

This thread has been so quiet lately! I’ve seen a lot of us on the ‘Pregnant or Not’ thread. Anyway, I have to chime in on the adoption thing. Make sure you check out ALL your options. It is possible to get a low-cost adoption without doing the foster-adopt thing. Many times private adoptions can cost very little, although it can sometimes take a little longer. And some agencies have grants and things to help financially. I know we spent a long time just researching all the options before we decided how to proceed with our adoption. There is a lot of information to digest, but I think it’s extremely important to have all the info available when you’re doing something as important as this. OK, off my soapbox! Good luck to all who are thinking of adoption, it can be the greatest thing that ever happens to your family.

 

[JustAnotherThou]

Hi all, I will preface this with I have not read any of the 500 some odd posts. I am fairly new here and am new to NFP and charting. I am hoping someone on here can give me some insight. Please forgive me I do not know all the terms.

My cycles are about 30 days long with my tempature rise/crosshairs (?) coming up on about day 27 or 28. From what I have read short luteal (?) phases such as mine can indicate low progesterone??? I am not sure if this is right. I also am not sure if this could be one of the reasons DH and I have been having problems conceiving.
I do know I also need to lose about 50 lbs. My dr said that he would not refer me to a RE because 1) I need to lose weight 2) my age, I am 37. He said that even if I lose the weight, he would not recommend it.
I have no other health problems (my cholesterol is low, my blood pressure is low, no diabetes, have never had female problems, etc.)
He told me that I am too high risk to try to conceive and I shouldn’t even try.
To say the least what he told me just really broke my heart and I did pretty much give up trying for the past year.
We are looking into adoption, although are looking at Fostering to Adopt at this time due to the cost of other adoptions. We have been told that Fostering to Adopt could take years.
I have REALLY started to work on my weight with exercise and watching what I eat.

I guess my questions are:

1. do you think my Dr was right and we just should not try to conceive?
2. is there anything naturally (other than getting my weight down) that can help? I do take pre-natal’s everyday.

Thanks

 

[Revert97]

Is this a Catholic Dr? Also, aside from 50#, which shouldnt in and of itself create infertility or make you high risk just because you are 37 (pulease!). If there are other reasons, maybe. AS for progesterone, often it is the issue with LPD (luteal phase defect, or a short luteal phase). If you are drinking caffeine, cut it out…there are a million books out there. One I suggest is TCOYF, which I am sure alot of TTCers have read a few times! It is by Toni Weschler - Taking Charge of Your Fertility. Be well, and stick with it…Will include you in my prayers…

 

[JustAnotherThou]

Is this a Catholic Dr? Also, aside from 50#, which shouldnt in and of itself create infertility or make you high risk just because you are 37 (pulease!). If there are other reasons, maybe. AS for progesterone, often it is the issue with LPD (luteal phase defect, or a short luteal phase). If you are drinking caffeine, cut it out…there are a million books out there. One I suggest is TCOYF, which I am sure alot of TTCers have read a few times! It is by Toni Weschler - Taking Charge of Your Fertility. Be well, and stick with it…Will include you in my prayers…

No he is not a Catholic Dr. I can’t find one in my area. When I told him 2 years ago that I was using NFP he all but laughed at me
The caffeine is one thing that I need to cut out! I drink dt. Pepsi like water. I have a friend that is a personal trainer, he told me if I would cut soda out all together and drink water I would lose 50 pounds quick. That is actually what I am giving up for Lent.
I have the book TCOYF, I have read it once, and have referred back to it a few times.
I just feel like I am going through a slump when it feels too impossible. The first couple months I did everything by the book (temping and charting), then I got in this mood and guess I just need some encouragement.
I do know I need to find another Dr. I was just hoping to drop some weight first.
Thank you for your reply

 

[dkoinzan]

You are not to old at 37. My Catholic Dr. unplugged one of my tubes during a surgery for adhesions. No would he do something like that if he thought it was useless? I just turned 40. Find a better doctor.

 

[JustAnotherThou]

You are not to old at 37. My Catholic Dr. unplugged one of my tubes during a surgery for adhesions. No would he do something like that if he thought it was useless? I just turned 40. Find a better doctor.

Dr told me anyone over 35 is automatically considered High Risk, and then gave me the long story about increased number of birth defects, pregnancy complications, miscarriages, etc. in women over 35.
Yes I know I need to find a better Dr. He was the only one that I could find in my area that did NOT give abortions. I plain out refuse to go to a Dr that would give an abortion. So even with all of his harsh criticisms, he is better than the alternative.
I did find a website for Catholic Dr.'s, there is one about 30 miles from us, so I might try to see if I can switch to him.

 

[Teakafrog]

Dr told me anyone over 35 is automatically considered High Risk, and then gave me the long story about increased number of birth defects, pregnancy complications, miscarriages, etc. in women over 35.
Yes I know I need to find a better Dr. He was the only one that I could find in my area that did NOT give abortions. I plain out refuse to go to a Dr that would give an abortion. So even with all of his harsh criticisms, he is better than the alternative.
I did find a website for Catholic Dr.'s, there is one about 30 miles from us, so I might try to see if I can switch to him.

Phooey. Women have given birth to healthy babies long after 35 for thousands of years. His malpractice insurance goes up after 35 is all.
I personally think it would be well worth your time for the 30 mile drive to get a decent dr. I went to a fertility specialist when I was at least that amount overweight, and while he mentioned weight loss would help, he certainly didn’t refuse to treat me! Yeah, go to a different doc.

 

[dkoinzan]

There are increased risks after 35. As Catholics, it isn’t about the risk, it’s about what God wills for us. I know that God loves me more than anything I can imagine and that he wants me to be with him. I place my fertility in his hands. I need only be open to life and make sure my health is the best it can be so that what ever his plan is, I don’t work against it. He may choose to give me a child and he may not. As Catholics, we can’t work against his plan for life.

 

[Revert97]

Amen 35 is not OLD! I think you should fly out to see someone better. There’s a great Napro Dr in Omaha NE and one In PA, and people FLY HUNDREDS of miles…you definitely need a new DR…and CUT OUT that Diet Pepsi. Besides wt loss, it has aspartame, which is formed from a “sister” of formaldehyde…YUCK! Besides headaches, it is all around not great for you…

Sending baby dust your way. And dont worry about the high risk stuff!

 

[JustAnotherThou]

Amen 35 is not OLD! I think you should fly out to see someone better. There’s a great Napro Dr in Omaha NE and one In PA, and people FLY HUNDREDS of miles…you definitely need a new DR…and CUT OUT that Diet Pepsi. Besides wt loss, it has aspartame, which is formed from a “sister” of formaldehyde…YUCK! Besides headaches, it is all around not great for you…

Sending baby dust your way. And dont worry about the high risk stuff!

Yeah I know. I get the headaches when I give it up. I really just need 3 days to lay in bed and suffer to give it up. I am determined to be rid of all caffeine by Lent.
It just frustrates me that a Dr can say something like that and then I get all down on myself. I need to CUT that OUT too!

 

[Teakafrog]

It just frustrates me that a Dr can say something like that and then I get all down on myself. I need to CUT that OUT too!

Yes, you do! You are a beautiful person, a wonderful child of God Almighty! :hug1: He has a plan for you. And if that plan involves children, sometimes He asks us to do our part to make that happen. That can mean getting as healthy as we can, by cutting out bad habits and starting healthy ones, and it can mean finding good medical care. If there was something wrong with any other part of your body, you wouldn’t just sit there, you’d find a specialist to fix it. Why do so many doctors think that it doesn’t matter if our reproductive systems work? Your emotional well-being is more than worth it to put up with the inconvenience of locating a good doctor that will work with you in finding the right treatments for you.

 

[aurora77]

Ladies, thank you so much for your support. Last night I had a mini-revelation of sorts. Multiple times in the Bible, God blesses barren women with children. It’s a matter of waiting for Him, for His timing. I know this sounds obvious, I’ve thought about this for a long time now, but last night I really got it, KWIM? I just felt this connection with Sarah, Rachel, Hannah, etc. I also felt a special connection with Our Lady. My Marian devotion has always been a bit lacking, but I felt a real closeness to her.

I don’t know what this means, but I’m going along for the ride!

Tammy, you’re right, I need to really research our options. I was bummed b/c I felt so sure that this was the right thing for us, now it’s not looking like that’s the case. Our agency does handle adoptions, too, not just foster care, so we’ll speak to them first about it.

JustanotherThou, I would definitely find another doctor. In my case, our infertility was caused by potentially serious health problems. If I’d gone along with my regular doctor (oh, just keep trying…) I might still not know and I’d be getting really sick. It’s your body and your money, you are worth a second opinion. Not that I’m implying you might have something seriously wrong, that was just my experience. Second opinions are wonderful things! It sounds like you’re on the right track, you know what you need to change in your life, that’s a big part of it right there.

Stadre–I hope you and your hubby will be able to set up classes. I know what you mean by there being benefits to our particular state in life. We don’t have children, there are benefits–we can travel on a whim, stay up late, get up early, do whatever we want without much pre-planning. DH and I have a great life now. The important thing is being open to what God has planned for us.

 

[dkoinzan]

We no longer are using NFP. Pray for us that we have the strength to do what ever it is that God asks of us. I pray that if we are called to conceive again, that this child will live.

 

[Teakafrog]

We no longer are using NFP. Pray for us that we have the strength to do what ever it is that God asks of us. I pray that if we are called to conceive again, that this child will live.

Praying for you. I know that decision must have taken a great deal of faith. May God reward you for it with a healthy child.