Inheritance?

[JustAnotherThou]

I was watching a show this morning and they were talking about inheritances and people’s expectations on what they think they are going to or should inherit?
I just thought I would shoot off a couple questions for all of you?

1. As adults, do you expect to receive some type of inheritance (monetary) from your parents, grandparents?
2. If yes why? If no why not?
3. Have you talked to your parents or grandparents about if you will inherit (monetary) anything?

I am just curious about inheritances that would go to adults, not minor children, I think that goes into a whole different belief system.

 

[JustAnotherThou]

My response to my own question is this:

No I do not expect any type of monetary inheritance from my parents due to the fact I am no longer dependant on them.

My parents have discussed with us that they have paid for their funeral arrangements, they have not given us the details, although they live in a small town and I am sure that the ocal funeral director gave them a packet that he will explain to us at that time.

I haven’t nor do I belive my siblings have discussed any life insurance policies with my parents. Nor would we bring it up to them.

 

[OutinChgoburbs]

I was watching a show this morning and they were talking about inheritances and people’s expectations on what they think they are going to or should inherit?
I just thought I would shoot off a couple questions for all of you?

1. As adults, do you expect to receive some type of inheritance (monetary) from your parents, grandparents? No way, and I am almost laughing at the thought!
2. If yes why? If no why not? We are grown-ups. Even if we expected it: a.) My parents don’t have that much, and would have to split that little bit seven ways. b.) My husband’s mother does not have that much. My husband’s stepmother pretty much became the big winner in “Who’s The Heir?” from my late father-in-law, although if we wanted to, we could take her court for 1/3 of the estate. By the time we got done with it, there might not be that much for her to live on, and she was the wife who stayed married to him the longest.
3. Have you talked to your parents or grandparents about if you will inherit (monetary) anything? Nothing monetary. I have asked about an antique carving set, and copies of my baby photos. I don’t like my mother’s or my mil’s taste in furniture, etc. One is too flowery, and the latter is too retro 60s/ 70s.

I am just curious about inheritances that would go to adults, not minor children, I think that goes into a whole different belief system.

 

[beckers]

I was watching a show this morning and they were talking about inheritances and people’s expectations on what they think they are going to or should inherit?
I just thought I would shoot off a couple questions for all of you?

1. As adults, do you expect to receive some type of inheritance (monetary) from your parents, grandparents?
2. If yes why? If no why not?
3. Have you talked to your parents or grandparents about if you will inherit (monetary) anything?

I am just curious about inheritances that would go to adults, not minor children, I think that goes into a whole different belief system.

1.) Nope-
2.) Its my parents money they worked hard for it and have already used it bless my life (my mom paid for college) so they can spend their money however they want. i am just blessed to still have them in my life!
3.) Briefly in passing. I think they might have some put aside for the grandkids to go to college in the future but other than that i no nothing.

 

[catholic79]

1. As adults, do you expect to receive some type of inheritance (monetary) from your parents, grandparents?

No

1. If yes why? If no why not?

I don’t expect but I hope they do leave something, I have younger brother who is 10 and if something were to happen to my parents any financial inheritance would certainly help provide for his future.

1. Have you talked to your parents or grandparents about if you will inherit (monetary) anything?

Yes, I know that I (and my DH) will be the guardians of my youngest sibling and that what ever financial inheritance there might be is to be used to care for him. My other brother who is 19 and in college knows this too and is okay with it, he knows he would always have home in my house but as he is getting older I don’t think he would take sis up on that offer! I imagine that my parents will change this as the younger one gets older. I hope he is well into adult life before anything happens to them and I hope to that when he is older my parents spend their money on them .

I am just curious about inheritances that would go to adults, not minor children, I think that goes into a whole different belief system.

 

[JustAnotherThou]

OutinChgoburbs:
I agree with you, the thought to me was just SOOO appalling!!
I have a grandmother in law who is in a nursing home and I about fell over one time when one family member made a comment that if she lived too long then there would be nothing left of her estate! Of course I had holes in my tongue by the time we got done with that conversation!
On this show, people were talking about how they were going to pay down their debt with their inheritance. And seriously their parents were probably not even past their 60’s!!!
I have also had friends make comments here and there over the years about they will get a big inheritance.

I guess I am missing something!!!

My parents also are not wealthy, therefore I hope they spend/donate every penny they have before they die and they they die happy!!!

 

[Em_in_FL]

1. No way…
2. My parents have never had excess cash… raising 4 kids is expensive and I’m not even sure how much they’ve got in their 401k’s… My dad’s still working mighty hard at age 60… my mom still works too.
3. Not a chance… they’ve mentioned wanting to pass on family heirlooms (furniture and such), but nothing about money…

Heck, they’re both still working into “retirement age” and I fully expect to have to participate in helping them, if necessary, as they age.
We actually help my MIL a little with $ (she’s on a fixed income)… and she reciprocates by helping us with practical stuff like laundry and such…

 

[CarrieH]

I do expect to inherit some money only because my parents were very frugal and put away a lot of money over the years. But it’s their money, and I don’t feel at all “entitled” to it. We have talked a bit about it, but only when they bring it up. They are quite elderly, and if one or both of them had to go into a nursing home, it wouldn’t take too many months to wipe out their assets. And if that should happen, it’s more important to me that they have good care and a nice place to stay than that I inherit their money. So I’m not counting my chickens before they are hatched, and I’m just glad that I still have my parents with me.

 

[lizaanne]

My parents are divorced and re-married. I don’t expect to receive any monetary inheritance from either of them. I think my Dad has me on a life insurance policy, and my Mom has told me that her vast collection of antiques and collections is my inheritance (which would be quite significant actually after auction, which is her intention). But we’ve never really discussed it. I don’t expect anything from them - they are going to need every penny they can get as they ease into retirement.

~Liza

 

[Truly_Beloved]

1. As adults, do you expect to receive some type of inheritance (monetary) from your parents, grandparents?

From my parents - No. I’ve told my mom that I hope she and dad spend everything they have on themselves.

From one set of grandparents - Yes. There is a trust set up for each grandchild, but I wish they would’ve spent it all on themselves or given it all to charity. Inheritance money causes too many problems in my family.

1. If yes why? If no why not?

No, because it’s their money – They should enjoy it. There are other things (like family Bibles) I would like to have, though, when they pass into the next life.

1. Have you talked to your parents or grandparents about if you will inherit (monetary) anything?

Yes, they have initiated such conversations, and I have respectfully insisted that they spend the money on themselves as much as they can.

 

[JustAnotherThou]

catholic79:
Catholic79
I do agree that things are WAY different when there are minor children involved. That is why I wanted to keep this thread just concerning adults. I guess I should have worded it something with “parents or grandparents with no minor dependants”. I do have a family member that is a disabled adult also and his parents did make special arrangements for his care and treatment for when they passed.
I guess I just don’t get why people who are not dependant (or are adults and shouldn’t be dependant) on their parents would expect a monetary inheritance. Hoping someone will give me some insight.

 

[jbethity]

1. my grandmother started bank accounts for each of the grandchildren when they were born and put the money she would have tucked into a card right into the account. I haven’t touched it and don’t exactly know for sure how much is in there, and I would like that, but if my grandparents need that money for something, they should have it. that would be the only monetary inheritance I’d expect from them though. I don’t expect any money from my parents either.
2. oops, guess I answered that above.
3. sort of with my grandmother. I told her I’d rather have things like pictures and other heirlooms than money. those are the best gifts. one christmas she gave me an antique dresser scarf her grandmother made, this past christmas she gave me a picture album filled with baby pictures of me, and most of them I hadn’t seen before. awesome!

 

[ChristineML]

Isn’t expecting an inheritance a little like expecting to win the lottery? Couldn’t it just as easily wind up the other way around: there’s no money left for you to inherit, rather you may be caring financially (or otherwise) for your parents in their old age due to expensive health issues, poor financial planning on their parts, unscrupulous financial advisers, etc.?

I have read that in the old days of family farming or small family businesses, parents had an obligation to leave an inheritance to their grown children because the grown children may have worked for their parents for years, and they need the land or the business to come to them for their livelihoods.

Nowadays, however, many monetary inheritances to grown children may not be necessary for their livelihoods, but rather may be used for unnecessary luxuries like a bigger house, a vacation home, a boat, a bigger car, etc. If the grown children are financially comfortable, one could make the argument that the parents should be encouraged to leave their money (beyond expenses associated with the funerals and legal fees to settle the estate) to worthy charities instead of to their grown children.

However, if the grown children are struggling financially or want to put their children through college, it may be a generous final gift of the parents to their grown children or grandchildren. But could that gift be a crutch that enables continued bad spending habits with no more inheritance money to bail them out in the future? Knowledge of one’s grown children’s poor spending habits may influence parents here NOT to leave them any money, in spite of the bad feelings that will result, because it’s in the grown children’s best interests not to support their bad habits, e.g. addictions to drugs/alcohol/gambling/debt, etc.

Personally, I’ve seen copies of my parents’ wills because I’m executor of their estate, and so they naturally gave me copies of the wills and their funeral/burial instructions. So I know they’re basically leaving all the money equally to us four children, assuming there’s anything left over after a (God-willing) long and healthy retirement. It surprised me that they didn’t leave anything to charity, not even to their local parish church, but I suppose we could donate our shares to charity if we wanted to, but it’s our choice. What brought up that question was that I heard that someone (not rich, just middle-class) gave Couple to Couple League over $100,000 a few years ago that they had inherited from their parents, because “they didn’t need it,” and they wanted the money to do some good and not be wasted on things they didn’t need. WOW!

 

[Goth_Catholic]

1. In my case, although it isn’t money, yes I do expect inhertience as an adult.
2. because what i will inhert has been a part of my family for generations
3. Well my grandfather has already willed the 275 aches of land that has been in our family for over a hundred years to my mother and my aunts. The shares are then to pass to his grandchildren follow the deaths of his daughters. One of my aunts does not have children so her share is in turned willed to me, my brothers, and my cousins following her death. The land has to stay in the family, unless each member agrees to sell. My father and uncles cannot inhert the land, nor can any futrue in-laws.

It’s complicated but like i said this is land that has been in this part of my family since they came over from Germany and France in the 1800s.

 

[catholic79]

Catholic79
I do agree that things are WAY different when there are minor children involved. That is why I wanted to keep this thread just concerning adults. I guess I should have worded it something with “parents or grandparents with no minor dependants”. I do have a family member that is a disabled adult also and his parents did make special arrangements for his care and treatment for when they passed.
I guess I just don’t get why people who are not dependant (or are adults and shouldn’t be dependant) on their parents would expect a monetary inheritance. Hoping someone will give me some insight.

I know I wanted to answer though and not many adults when they are - gulp - almost 30 have a 10 year old sibling. I worked in a trust department for awhile and had a family fight that Dad wanted his millions (yes millions) to go to a charity. It as really really sad the kids (all over 45) came to the bank the morning of the funeral and asked us when we were going to pay the bill. Each of the kids were going to get between 300,000 and 500,000 in addition to the charity BTW.

 

[Chovy]

I was watching a show this morning and they were talking about inheritances and people’s expectations on what they think they are going to or should inherit?
I just thought I would shoot off a couple questions for all of you?

1. As adults, do you expect to receive some type of inheritance (monetary) from your parents, grandparents? I expect to receive 1/5th of what my mother leaves. I have four siblings.
2. If yes why? If no why not? Because that’s what her will says. If she has nothing left, than I get 1/5th of $0. That seems unlikely because my mother is very frugal by nature and has long-term care insurance. I am not banking on any of her money for my personal financial future. Eventually she will pass away and if I am still alive and she leaves me something, that will be a surprise windfall.
3. Have you talked to your parents or grandparents about if you will inherit (monetary) anything? My sister and I are the executors of my mother’s will, so she has told us what it says. I am in the financial services industry so I helped her invest and she shared with me the relevant information about her finances at that time. Since then, all five of us are doing pretty well financially, and she has indicated that she is certainly not going to scrimp on anything she wants. I am happy that she is doing things for herself and nothing would make me happier than if she had spent whatever inheritance I may have otherwise had on travel and entertainment for herself at her passing.

I am just curious about inheritances that would go to adults, not minor children, I think that goes into a whole different belief system.

 

[JustAnotherThou]

I know I wanted to answer though and not many adults when they are - gulp - almost 30 have a 10 year old sibling. I worked in a trust department for awhile and had a family fight that Dad wanted his millions (yes millions) to go to a charity. It as really really sad the kids (all over 45) came to the bank the morning of the funeral and asked us when we were going to pay the bill. Each of the kids were going to get between 300,000 and 500,000 in addition to the charity BTW.

I think it is sad to think about the number of families that have been torn apart due to inheritances. I know my dads family was one of those. Grandpa passed away about 20 years ago and some of them (aunts, uncles, dad) are still holding grudges about who got what and who didn’t get what. I felt sooooo bad for my grandma for having to go through that.
I guess in some ways I just wonder would it be better for those who have things left to give to give it to who they want before they pass, spend it all

Maybe there is no right answer to all of this. I have a 20 year old son and I question, should I leave him any monetary inheritance?

Funny thing is, my husband works for a life insurance company.

 

[catholic79]

I guess in some ways I just wonder would it be better for those who have things left to give to give it to who they want before they pass, spend it all

Maybe there is no right answer to all of this. I have a 20 year old son and I question, should I leave him any monetary inheritance?

Funny thing is, my husband works for a life insurance company.

My DH is an attorney, and I have heard plenty of stories about what get written in wills and trust. You know your son and you know what he needs. I don’t want my parents to save money for us to have when they are gone if it means they don’t do something they want. I also hope they don’t leave everything to the dog too.

Now I do hope that I get my moms mothers ring. that’s not in the will

 

[JustAnotherThou]

My DH is an attorney, and I have heard plenty of stories about what get written in wills and trust. You know your son and you know what he needs. I don’t want my parents to save money for us to have when they are gone if it means they don’t do something they want. I also hope they don’t leave everything to the dog too.

Now I do hope that I get my moms mothers ring. that’s not in the will

Well, if you get the dog
Just kidding

 

[catholic79]

Well, if you get the dog
Just kidding

[SIGN]Funny[/SIGN]