Insight into a guy's mind

[CradleJourney]

I’m not sure exactly why I said that. I’m not not going to make plans to hang out with him. Any plans I’ve made I’ve made in the thought of just hanging out. I’m trying my best to be more of a friend i just have some difficulty speaking up and making conversation with anyone. I’ve few friends that I can have conversation with easily, otherwise it’s more of an effort for me.

I didn’t mean to make it sound like I’m shunning him. I’m still going to make plans to include him. I just just get a little disappointed when I try hanging out on on one, with anyone really, and they can’t. I can’t open up easily in a group setting and I’m just trying to get the friends closest to me to understand me more. I just do best when I have only one person to talk to, which is why I was wanting to hang out with him so I can just talk. It’s hard to explain but I just don’t want to be awkward in conversations.

I’m not going to be able to have any time this year to think on him anyways, I’m keeping myself busy with school and work. I’m trying not to sugar coat any of this. I cannot say I won’t have hope but I’m just going to do my best to remain friends.

Sounds like a good plan to me

I’m the mom of a son who just graduated high school. He never had a romantic relationship He really was incredibly busy studying, and he just isn’t that social - doesn’t like the pressure of one on one interaction. He has a good time in a group or doing an activity but not just hanging out with one or two people (even good friends). He also isn’t mature enough yet to automatically consider how his actions send messages to others. If he was the young man in your situation, it’d never occur to him that he was repeatedly turning you down and that it would make you consider what your friendship was worth to him. He would, quite literally, take each situation as it came up and react directly to that - either going on not depending on how interesting it sounded to him.

In other words, I pretty much agree with all the other posters - and with your assessment that his excuses are probably valid. But like you said, for you, it’s best for you to try to move on to some other things and just allow your friendship to stay where it is.

 

[Jake_Parker]

I’m not sure exactly why I said that. I’m not not going to make plans to hang out with him. Any plans I’ve made I’ve made in the thought of just hanging out. I’m trying my best to be more of a friend i just have some difficulty speaking up and making conversation with anyone. I’ve few friends that I can have conversation with easily, otherwise it’s more of an effort for me.

I didn’t mean to make it sound like I’m shunning him. I’m still going to make plans to include him. I just just get a little disappointed when I try hanging out on on one, with anyone really, and they can’t. I can’t open up easily in a group setting and I’m just trying to get the friends closest to me to understand me more. I just do best when I have only one person to talk to, which is why I was wanting to hang out with him so I can just talk. It’s hard to explain but I just don’t want to be awkward in conversations.

I’m not going to be able to have any time this year to think on him anyways, I’m keeping myself busy with school and work. I’m trying not to sugar coat any of this. I cannot say I won’t have hope but I’m just going to do my best to remain friends.

I can relate, I am the same way when it comes to hanging out with people. I would much rather spend time one on one with somebody, over it being a group of people. I was even more like that in high school. I spent a lot of my time with just one friend at a time, I enjoyed the conversations we could have without having other people around that would get bored by conversation, or having to worry about pleasing everyone in the group. I would say I am better with groups of friends now, but I still prefer smaller groups than larger.

The thing to remember, likeCradleJourney said, is that this guy you’re talking about is probably not like that. I know people that actually do not like spending time just one-on-one, and he’s probably very busy with other things too. He is likely not thinking about what he’s doing and how it affects you.