Interdenominational relationships RCC/JW

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b_justb

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engaged. getting married at fiancee’s church.
I don’t think I CAN get married at a KH. . .
since my FI is Catholic and not a JW.
We have a meeting with his priest tomorrow night.
I guess you can start a thread if you want to discuss a JW marrying a Catholic but I wouldn’t wnt it to get ugly. Some people feel really strongly about it. So do I - we’re doing what’s best for us. We’ve discussed all implications and have decided living without each other due to religion is nonsense. We’ll be much happier together than apart.
Aside from that, start a thread if you want. . . lol
OK, Cool. Thanks Jaded. If you don’t mind maybe you can keep us updated as to how it goes. Like when you go visit the priest maybe tell us the highlights or the points discussed, etc.? Would that be something you’d want to do?
 
This was taken from a website called:

inthespiritofcana.org


**2.6.11 Marriage to a Member of a Non-Christian Religion **

Marriages between a Catholic and a member of a non-Christian religion (e.g., Jew, Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu, and Mormon) are often called “interreligious” or “interfaith” marriages. The canonical term “disparity of cult” refers to a marriage between a Catholic and an unbaptized person.

Interfaith marriages vary greatly, due to the great diversity in non-Christian religions. A few distinctions to keep in mind: Islam, Judaism, and Christianity are called “Abrahamic religions” because they share belief in the same one God and claim Abraham as their spiritual father. These religions have a very different worldview than religions such as Hinduism and Buddhism.

The Catholic Church does not encourage such marriages, and declares the difference of religion to be a diriment impediment. To be valid, a dispensation has to be obtained for such a marriage (see Canon 1086).

Note also that in cases where a baptism is not recognized, the procedure for non-Christian marriages should be followed.

Procedure

Consultation with religious leaders from both traditions is encouraged, not only to discuss the details of the wedding ceremony, but also to prepare for and continue support of the marriage.

For such a marriage, The Rite for Marriage between a Catholic and an Unbaptized Person is to be used, except where dispensation from the canonical form has been obtained.

Double ceremonies are not allowed and the vows are not repeated. In other words, the Catholic Church does not permit two religious celebrations of the same marriage to express or renew matrimonial consent. However, cultural or ethnic ceremonies can be added to the marriage ceremony, so long as the vows are not repeated (Province of Chicago Ecumenical Guidelines) .

Paperwork

A dispensation for disparity of cult is needed. A dispensation from canonical form is also required if the couple will be having someone other than a Catholic priest or deacon witness their vows. To obtain the dispensation, the Catholic party will be asked to affirm in some way (verbally or in writing) that he or she will promise to do all in his/her power to see that the children of the marriage be baptized and educated in the Catholic Church. The other partner is to be informed of these promises and responsibilities; the non-Catholic partner may feel a similar obligation because of his/her own religious commitment. No formal written or oral promise is required of the non-Catholic partner. In carrying out this duty of transmitting the Catholic faith to the children, the Catholic parent will do so with respect for the religious freedom and conscience of the other parent and with due regard for the unity and permanence of the marriage and for the maintenance of the communion of the family.

familyministries.org/www.inthespiritofcana.org/_derived/2.6.11.1.htm_cmp_radial010_hbtn.gif familyministries.org/www.inthespiritofcana.org/_derived/2.6.11.2.htm_cmp_radial010_hbtn.gif familyministries.org/www.inthespiritofcana.org/_derived/2.6.11.3.htm_cmp_radial010_hbtn.gif
 
I’m pretty sure that’s what the meeting with the priest is all about.
 
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b_justb:
I’m pretty sure that’s what the meeting with the priest is all about.
This made me smile. No offense to the poster. 🙂

Yea, that’s kind of why we’re going tomorrow. Dispensation, declaration of nullity (for my previous marriage). The priest said they DO recognize a JW marriage AND my baptism though so I am not an “unbaptized person”. Good thing.

Sure, I’ll post about it here.

I wish I could find more people like me out there. There are plenty of jewish/catholic, protestant/catholic, etc weddings but none are jw/catholic. I guess me and my mom are the only ones. And even my parents were BOTH Catholic when they first got married. My mom converted later. So I guess I’m the only one. I’m special and different, yes I am. lol.
 
The priest said they DO recognize a JW marriage AND my baptism though so I am not an “unbaptized person”. Good thing.
A heads up on this Jaded. You may want to double check with the Diocesan office in your area. The Roman Catholic Church does not recognize a mormon or jw baptism.
I was in R.C.I.A. for 3 years and we had 2 ex-mormons and an ex-jw go through. All 3 claimed to have been baptised in their former religions. All 3 persons were baptised at their Confirmations on Easter Vigil.
 
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catsrus:
A heads up on this Jaded. You may want to double check with the Diocesan office in your area. The Roman Catholic Church does not recognize a mormon or jw baptism.
I was in R.C.I.A. for 3 years and we had 2 ex-mormons and an ex-jw go through. All 3 claimed to have been baptised in their former religions. All 3 persons were baptised at their Confirmations on Easter Vigil.
Well, I’ll definitely ask tonight of course. Either way, I don’t want to “be Catholic” so I guess it’s just a matter of how they classify the marriage. Doesn’t make much difference to me as long as we get married and it’s okay for my fiancee. Thanks though.
 
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Jaded27:
Well, I’ll definitely ask tonight of course. Either way, I don’t want to “be Catholic” so I guess it’s just a matter of how they classify the marriage. Doesn’t make much difference to me as long as we get married and it’s okay for my fiancee. Thanks though.
I’m glad you’re willing to share this experience with us. I hope that if some posts go this way or that we can come back to center topic and keep the thread alive. Thanks again.
 
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b_justb:
I’m glad you’re willing to share this experience with us. I hope that if some posts go this way or that we can come back to center topic and keep the thread alive. Thanks again.
Well, t-minus 6 and a half hours and counting until our meeting. . .

Is it silly that I’m being such a girl about “what on earth do I wear?” I mean, I know it’s not as formal as JWs. People go to church in ripped jeans for crying out loud. But I want to “look nice”. Eh, we’ll see.

Training is still SUCKING at work so I’m already nice and stressed for my meeting tonight. Woo hoo. lol.
 
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Jaded27:
Is it silly that I’m being such a girl about “what on earth do I wear?” I mean, I know it’s not as formal as JWs. People go to church in ripped jeans for crying out loud. But I want to “look nice”. Eh, we’ll see.
Wear whatever feels comfortable for you. A nice pair of slacks, or even a dress. Even a nice pair of jeans and a nice top would be appropriate.

Good luck on your meeting tonight! 👍
 
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Tonks40:
Wear whatever feels comfortable for you. A nice pair of slacks, or even a dress. Even a nice pair of jeans and a nice top would be appropriate.

Good luck on your meeting tonight! 👍
Thanks!

I’m thinking jeans and boots and a nice shirt. . .
This could degenerate into a clothing discussion real quick so I’ll stop now. lol.

::sigh:: back to work. help me. . .
 
Alrighty - meeting review/overview:

We met with Father Kevin (here on known as “FK” because I do not want to type it over and over again) at 6:30 thursday. My FI (fiancee) went to confession/reconcilliation earlier in the day to get that over with so that I wouldn’t have to really talk about too many details. FK is just about my FI’s age, a couple years older, so he’s very easy going and not all the letter of the law type of priest, which was great.

We sat and talked until 9:30 at night!! The first half hour was mostly about the annullment. He just took down some general info like how old I was when I got married and what religion we were and if it was a religious or civil ceremony. He should have put a call in yesterday to their canon law contact in their area about if I will even need an annullment because I’m not baptized or married under the trinity. He seemed to think we wouldn’t but he said he’s not an expert so he should hear back about it by at least next Wednesday. I just want them to say I don’t need it so that for once in my life things will be a little easier than they could be. 🙂

I told him about this forum and how helpful some of the people have been and how that’s how I knew at least some of the stuff about the annullment. He seemed very pleased that most had been pleasant to me. I told him how the first time I asked a question about me and FI getting married I was told “you and your friend should part ways. . .” He was totally shocked and said that’s not what the church teaches at all and that as long as you are both spiritual people you can find things in common and share that with one another. It’s more difficult, yes, but you shouldn’t not get married jjust because of religion. I really liked that. Then I told him the next time I came back and tried again everyone was much more accepting so I must just have gotten the “old school” people on here the first time. I think he might even check this forum out. He said it sounded interesting.

So we got the annullment/background stuff out of the way and then the three of us just sat and chatted about religion and other things for a couple hours. He told us about his training in Rome and how he was a hermit for a couple years and stuff like that. All very interesting. I always like learning about other religions. And he asked me questions about JWs because he didn’t really know anything about us at all. I told him about how we don’t celebrate holidays, believe in the trinity, the cross, etc. He was very interested and understanding.

My FI was really happy that I took such an interest and was asking so many questions. Honestly, FK and I just chatted and chatted about religion and my FI piped in every once in a while. I found it all very informative. I did tell him I wasn’t interested in any way in converting but that I have no problem with balancing out our religious lives now and also when we have children. I told him how I don’t care if they go to “grammy and gramps’” house to open presents or something but I don’t want a Christmas tree in my house for example. He didn’t seeme shocked by that at all and was just fine with all of it. He said that a group from his church even gets together with. . . I can’t remember the name of the relligion now, but it was one that is very different from Catholocism. . .and they get together with a group from that church and pray together because that’s the one thing they have in common. Isn’t that nice?

cont. in next post.
 
So to sum up, it went REALLY well. And I asked if we don’t have to have the annullment what will we have to go through to get married? He said we’d just put through the “disparity of cult” forms (that only takes a few days) and I laughed and made some joke about how I was never so glad to be called a cult in my life. He thought that was funny. Very easy going guy. Then he said we just make an appointment to attend a pre cana class. But in their district it only lasts one day, not a whole weekend. Rock! lol. And then we can go to a concert that the organist has at the church every once in a while and pick out all our wedding songs and verses and stuff. Kinda neat. We asked if he’d marry us and he said he’d love to and we also asked how popular October is in the church and he said it’s pretty much wide open and it shouldn’t be a problem.

So, here’s hoping that I don’t need the annullment. I haven’t prayed about it yet. I know that we pretty much pray to the same God, but I feel kind of silly praying to Jehovah about not needing a Catholic annullment? Know what I mean? No offense is intended.

So there’s my story. Hope you all enjoyed my long winded review of it. (oh, something that REALLY shocked my FI - I asked if anyone could go to confession. I wasn’t really thinking of doing it but I was kind of curious. And FK explained about the sacrements and such, but my FI was just so happy I asked. Hey, we aim to please right? lol.)

Hopefully this thread will open up some interesting, informative, and most importantly PEACEFUL discussion on here. I did ask FK if he knew of any other JW/RCC marriages and he said there were two in our church, but they weren’t very active. So I’ve yet to find anyone in the same situation as me, but maybe someday. In the meantime, maybe someone will find this thread while searching for info or something.

So thanks for listening and have a great day all. 🙂
 
Wow, Jaded, that’s wonderful! Sounds like Fr. Kevin was very helpful in your situation, and very accepting.

I think the most important thing I got out of your post was that God wants us to love and have love in our lives, and with the kindness and graces that you and your fiance recieved that day, that’s a clear sign that His love is definately working in your lives!

I hope you can continue with your posts here in this forum to ask questions, or just have a little fun. I feel you have a heart of gold, and not to offend, but I, for one, am happy that you’re part of our “Catholic” family (not in the fullness sense, of course). 👍

God Bless!
Tonks40

PS - don’t forget to invite Fr. Kevin to dinner! I’m planning on doing the same thing once my own annulment goes through.
 
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Tonks40:
I think the most important thing I got out of your post was that God wants us to love and have love in our lives, and with the kindness and graces that you and your fiance recieved that day, that’s a clear sign that His love is definately working in your lives!
yes, I agree. It’s so much nicer to focus on what we (as the human race) have in common rather than what we don’t.
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Tonks40:
I hope you can continue with your posts here in this forum to ask questions, or just have a little fun. I feel you have a heart of gold, and not to offend, but I, for one, am happy that you’re part of our “Catholic” family (not in the fullness sense, of course). 👍
I get the meaning. It’s appreciated. Thanks. 🙂
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Tonks40:
PS - don’t forget to invite Fr. Kevin to dinner! I’m planning on doing the same thing once my own annulment goes through.
oh yes, we are totally inviting him to dinner at some point. He’s very cool and nice and intelligent. I’d love to discuss religion with him some more some time. Regular conversation is always good too. 😉

And we plan to invite him to the reception too of course. I’m getting really excited. Wednesday seems so far away to find out about the annullment. . .
 
Jaded,

I’m very happy it is working out for you. I really really hope you don’t have to go through the whole annulment process… my bet is you won’t. 🙂 CM

p.s. Did you notice the “say something positive about other faiths” on the Non-cath thread ?? There were some nice things said about JW’s. 🙂

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=75208
 
carol marie:
p.s. Did you notice the “what I admire about other faiths” on the Non-cath thread ?? There were some nice things said about JW’s. 🙂
where’s that?
 
Got it. And I even put a reply. Would you believe I had more than one reason for putting “catholic”? 😛
 
carol marie:
Yes I would! 😉
LOL. Okay, I should have stressed “would you believe*** I*** had more than one reason to put “catholic”?”
 
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