Your right, I would be. Doesn’t it get exhausting to flip out over this stuff? I mean, if you freak out over this, how do you have the energy to get angry at the real horrors in life, like abortion and poverty? Most humans can’t spend their days angry at everything…
I agree. To me, it’s not worth getting overly upset over things like this even though music is an extremely important aspect of my life. There are few things I truly get angry over. I admit, in my early to mid-20s, I did sometimes become angry over this subject. When I think back, I know it was necessary in my spiritual growth, especially during that time when I was really digging deep into my soul, coming to terms with certain hardships inflicted on me during that time, being too idealistic and feeling like I had this huge responsibility to change and better the world and also reading more of what the Church taught and espoused, especially with the music documents. And then realizing how many lies I was told growing up with regards to music. As a child of the 80s and 90s (never mind the lack of catechesis), mention chant or any kind of music Pre-Vat II and they’d treat you like you were some freak child/teen, that no one did or was allowed to do that music anymore. It was as if they were trying to keep a secret and were really surprised that a kid would even be aware of the past. So, you keep your mouth shut and just go with the flow, but then you discover that what you were told was not true and I admit it made me a bit upset for a while.
But you grow out of it. I believe you sometimes need the pain in order to get deep within yourself and see the true brightness of beauty. You then realize that in order to be a truly good person to others, you have to be open and loving. In addition, for me, as a musician, to be a true artistic musician, that openness, depth and loving attitude is also required. Staying angry, bitter and negative, no matter how wrong you think a person is or parts of the world are, is detrimental to all aspects of your life. On top of that, having a child further changed my outlook. It became a waste of time to heavily argue about certain things in life and I wanted to stay away from negativity for a while in order to not pass that attitude down to my child. I had so many more important parts of my life to focus on and worry about. It made me view subjects with a much more calm and loving, and yet detached attitude for the most part.
So, when I am in similar conversations like this in real life or on threads, I view it from a few different aspects of myself. 1. I see it from my sensitive, emotional self… in order to understand why I or someone else feel the way we do about certain religious and sacred liturgical music. 2. I also look at it from an analytical and intellectual basis… leaving out the feeling and emotional aspects of it, trying to clearly view it from the Church’s stance even if I realize that some of the religious music I truly love really isn’t appropriate for mass, and willingly give it up. Also, reading up on as much church music history and regular history as possible (I LOVE history and am kind of dork in that regard.) 3. Then I also view it from a practical standpoint, being understanding of the situations and needs of individual parishes, knowing that not every place is a metropolis like where I live where you can find incredible musicians, that you can only go as far as the pastor will allow you, that you can’t insist on immediate change, but a gradual one.
Anyway, enough musings on my part. One of the things I am thankful for is that I now can attend a mass with polyphony, chant, organ or just more traditional playing of hymns and “traditional” hymns in general. In the past when I was growing up that wasn’t the case. But again, I believe we are in a transitional phase similar to what occurred in the late 19th and early 20th centuries. The Church is trying to reign some of this music in, so you are beginning to see more parishes balancing out, and I think you will find more of the newer music and playing styles be a bit more refined or just die out in general if it can’t be refined, like many other music and instruments from the past that we don’t even really know about anymore.
I always enjoy reading your posts, so thank you for the conversation.
