Is Christian life supposed to be dry, desolate, and empty?

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I seem to have problems with faith. Is my faith supposed to be restrictive? It seems like I can’t indulge too much as a Catholic. Is it supposed to be depressing that you can’t do certain things as a Catholic? I try to obey God’s commandments and I still feel empty.

Also I hear about prosperity ministers. Are we really supposed to believe that God has blessings that are bigger than what we can imagine? I remember a priest in confession telling me this. Or do we have to just count our blessings and not expect too many great things to happen to us until we go to heaven? I am divided on this. I guess we can’t expect great things or marvelous things to happen to us and if they do it will be probably very limited, at least for me. On the other hand, it seems it is a lack of faith to not believe that God has great things in store for you here on Earth. I tried to live a life of just being thankful for the basics that I have like driving, going to school, and having food. However it gets frustrating so I don’t know if I am doing the right thing by just trying to be grateful for what I have or whether I should have more faith in God’s blessings. It is something that has been confusing me for some time.
 
It sounds like what one might expect to find on the road following Catholicism. Many Saints had to go through similar situations. I’ll remember you in my prayers.
 
As Robert said your feelings are very similar to many saints, so I hope you can find some comfort in being on the right track. It sounds like you have a desire for greater fulfillment. Unfortunately this can be a conundrum for a Catholic. As a child of God you will not feel completely fulfilled until you are with God in heaven. However some people feel fulfilled simply going to Mass every Sunday and working a regular 9-5 job. Others feel the need to do things much more drastic like wander the wilderness. If you want to accomplish great things then you will need to completely abandon your own desires for the sake of God’s will.
 
Praying to the Holy Spirit to give you guidance, direction, strength, fortitude & wisdom in your time of need.
 
Praying for you. Choose joy. Give thanks. Look outward. Peace to you.
 
MTarcisius said:
As Robert said your feelings are very similar to many saints, so I hope you can find some comfort in being on the right track. It sounds like you have a desire for greater fulfillment. Unfortunately this can be a conundrum for a Catholic. As a child of God you will not feel completely fulfilled until you are with God in heaven. However some people feel fulfilled simply going to Mass every Sunday and working a regular 9-5 job. Others feel the need to do things much more drastic like wander the wilderness. If you want to accomplish great things then you will need to completely abandon your own desires for the sake of God’s will.
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Well said 👍
 
What fun stuff can’t you do as a Catholic? We’re okay with good food, good drink, music, dancing, video games, etc…

The Church doesn’t forbid innocent amusement. Do something fun that is good!

Now, if you used to do bad “fun stuff,” obviously you can’t do that. But you’re allowed to find new hobbies and pastimes that aren’t bad.

If you have a specific problem, feel free to tell us about it, and we’ll find you something fun to do!
 
BobCatholic said:
The answer is “YES”

Matthew 16:24
Then Jesus said to his disciples: If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.

youtube.com/watch?v=kgZbP8nddhU
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this is where I am confused in Jeremiah it also says the Lord has plans to prosper us. I remember a priest saying if you say something is too good to be true then that is blasphemy saying that God cannot possibly give you something that is too good to be true. The bible also says ask and you will receive.
 
John 10:10 “I have come that you may have life and have it abundantly”. More often than not, the sense of abundance is found as our journey of faith brings us closer to Him. James 4:8 tells us “draw near to God and God will draw near to you”. It is a journey though, and takes effort just as any other journey.

The one thing of which we can be sure, our internal longing for fulfillment will not be reached through external acquisition of material belongings.

Good luck!
 
No, it is not supposed to be dry, desolate, and empty. Although it may indeed seem that way at times. I have felt this desolation and emptiness. Then, through prayer and searching, I found something that helps in changing all that.

Written material on this very subject suggests that fulfillment, meaning, success, and happiness are not things we can seek and find directly. Instead, they are byproducts of having a purpose in life that is greater than self. And in order to have a purpose, you must get in touch with your core values. In other words, you are being called to your graces.

Once you identify your true values and concerns (which, by the way might take some time in doing), you can then start to discern your purpose. Identify what makes your heart sing, and what stirs your soul. And what you are here for. What your mission is. It’s an individual thing. There isn’t a perfect answer. Through prayer, and thought, and feeling, your true values will emerge. And your purpose will become clearer.

Of course, a life purpose can change. For example, married folks have a great sense of purpose in raising their family. Later, as the kids grow into adulthood, the couple may feel emptiness. This will happen, and it stirs the soul to find a purpose for the next part of life.

I read something interesting about happiness - that the deepest human value is not happiness. We feel empty, lost, or lack meaning because we’re looking for the wrong thing. The cure for being lost in this way, and not feeling happiness, fulfillment and success is to have a Purpose. Through purpose you will find passion, drive, etc. When you live ‘on purpose’ the happiness and fulfillment and success will occur as a byproduct. When you are living on purpose you will know why you are doing what you are doing. And the rest follows.

Being Christian provides us with great opportunities to pursue purposes that are greater than self. Whether it is teaching, parenting, volunteering, or living a consecrated life, or serving others in some unique way, there are many purposes to choose from.
 
realtiger said:
this is where I am confused in Jeremiah it also says the Lord has plans to prosper us. I remember a priest saying if you say something is too good to be true then that is blasphemy saying that God cannot possibly give you something that is too good to be true. The bible also says ask and you will receive.
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God was talking spiritually, not temporally.

There is a TON of grace out there.

If you love God the afterlife is awesome.

Now, while on this planet, the temporal things, we are supposed to suffer and have pain. That’s the cross.
 
+JMJ+

If you are a Christian and you are not joyful, then you are doing something wrong.

Let me repeat that, clarified, with glowing bolded letters:

If you are a Christian and you are not joyful, right here and right now, then you are doing something wrong.

“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice!” Philippians 4:4

I did not say that you that if you are a Christian you must not be dry, desolate, nor empty. You can be any or all of those, and still be full of joy. That is the mystery, yet the certainty, of the Beatitudes: “Happy are those…”

According to St. Thomas Aquinas, in our hearts are four “wants”, called the appetitive powers. The appetitive powers are the drives of a human being to do things. The “lower want” is the concupiscible appetite: this is the drive to maintain our body and propagate our species. The “fearful want” is the irascible appetite: this is the drive to keep ourselves and our wants safe. Finally, the “higher want” is the rational appetite: this is our drive to be part of the human race and not to live on the level of an animal. The concupiscible and the irascible appetites are together called the sensitive appetite because we acutely feel them. But there is another appetite, the highest of them all, which is called free will, and it is called “free” because it can act for or against any or all of the other appetites, and “will” because this is the root of all human (voluntary) action.

The Thomistic view is that all the appetites work together so that man can be truly happy. That is the true drive of humanity: to be happy. Therefore, all the appetites have their own version of happiness. For the concupiscible appetite, it is pleasure; for the irascible appetite, security; for the rational appetite, contemplation; for the free will, joy.

Joy is therefore the highest form of happiness, and you become joyful by being truly free. If you are not free, then the lowest forms of happiness will take over. “Man cannot live without joy. That is why one deprived of spiritual joys goes over to carnal pleasures,” as St. Thomas Aquinas himself wrote. But freedom is not license: freedom is not the “freedom” to do anything you want. A train is not free to be without rails; a triangle is not free to remove one of its sides. Rather, freedom is to be the best person you are meant to be.

Therefore, joy is dependent on pleasure, security, and contemplation, in that one should not supplant over the other but in that they should help joy. You use your need for pleasure, security, and contemplation to be more joyful, and the first step to do this is to realize that pleasure, security, and contemplation are NOT joy. Sometimes, you have to sacrifice any or all of the other three to be joyful.

The second step is to realize that to be free is to be limited, because to be free is to make choices. In other words, the most basic and greatest act of freedom is to give itself away. When you choose to go to the library, you are not free anymore to go to the mall. When you choose to fast, you are not anymore free to eat. When you choose to get married, you are not free anymore to be romantically inclined to anybody else.

That is why joy is something many people are not acquainted with, since its price, freedom itself, is so high. “But thanks be to God, that you who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the standard of teaching to which you were committed, and, having been set free from sin, have become slaves of righteousness” (Roman 6:17-18). It is only in giving away our freedom do we become truly free, truly joyful, truly alive.

That is the reason Matthew 16:24 says: “Then Jesus said to his disciples: If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.” That is why Jesus said in Luke 9:62: “No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.” That is why Jesus said in Revelation 3:16: “Because you are lukewarm–neither hot nor cold–I am about to spit you out of my mouth.”

The third step, then, is to know how to give away your freedom, that you may be truly free and be full of joy. This is easy to know: “For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love be servants of one another. For the whole law is fulfilled in one word, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself’” (Galatians 5:13-14). But it is impossible to achieve without God’s help: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such there is no law” (Galatians 5:22-23).

So, let us all pray St. Augustine’s prayer, that we may truly follow Scripture’s commandment for us to rejoice always: “O Lord, command what you will, and give what you command.”
 
There are yes times of suffering in life…and of struggles in prayer…dryness and such - but that is no not the whole of Christian life!

Jesus of Nazareth is our joy and our life. Nor is Christian life all about “no’s” rather it involves a great yes.

Indeed:

“Being Christian is not the result of an ethical choice or a lofty idea, but the encounter with an event, a person, which gives life a new horizon and a decisive direction.”

~ Pope Benedict XVI Deus Caritas Est

“If we are in relation with him who does not die, who is Life itself and Love itself, then we are in life. Then we “live”.”

~ Pope Benedict XVI (Spe Salvi)

w2.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/encyclicals/documents/hf_ben-xvi_enc_20071130_spe-salvi.html

(such is not per se a matter of the emotions…tis deeper that such …though it can can does effect the emotions too at times…Christian joy though can exist even in great suffering…and struggles…)

“The joy of the gospel fills the hearts and lives of all who encounter Jesus.”

“I invite all Christians, everywhere, at this very moment, to a renewed personal encounter with Jesus Christ, or at least an openness to letting him encounter them; I ask all of you to do this unfailingly each day. No one should think that this invitation is not meant for him or her, since “no one is excluded from the joy brought by the Lord”.”

“The Lord does not disappoint those who take this risk; whenever we take a step towards Jesus, we come to realize that he is already there, waiting for us with open arms. Now is the time to say to Jesus: “Lord, I have let myself be deceived; in a thousand ways I have shunned your love, yet here I am once more, to renew my covenant with you. I need you. Save me once again, Lord, take me once more into your redeeming embrace”. How good it feels to come back to him whenever we are lost! Let me say this once more: God never tires of forgiving us; we are the ones who tire of seeking his mercy. Christ, who told us to forgive one another “seventy times seven” (Mt 18:22) has given us his example: he has forgiven us seventy times seven. Time and time again he bears us on his shoulders. No one can strip us of the dignity bestowed upon us by this boundless and unfailing love. With a tenderness which never disappoints, but is always capable of restoring our joy, he makes it possible for us to lift up our heads and to start anew. Let us not flee from the resurrection of Jesus, let us never give up, come what will. May nothing inspire more than his life, which impels us onwards!”…

“I realize of course that joy is not expressed the same way at all times in life, especially at moments of great difficulty. Joy adapts and changes, but it always endures, even as a flicker of light born of our personal certainty that, when everything is said and done, we are infinitely loved.”

~ Pope Francis (The Joy of the Gospel)

w2.vatican.va/content/francesco/en/apost_exhortations/documents/papa-francesco_esortazione-ap_20131124_evangelii-gaudium.html#The_joy_of_the_gospel
 
"Moreover, our radical belonging to Christ and the fact that “we are in him” must imbue in us an attitude of total trust and immense joy. In short, we must indeed exclaim with St Paul: “If God is for us, who is against us?” (Rom 8: 31). And the reply is that nothing and no one “will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Rom 8: 39). Our Christian life, therefore, stands on the soundest and safest rock one can imagine. And from it we draw all our energy, precisely as the Apostle wrote: “I can do all things in him who strengthens me” (Phil 4: 13).

Therefore, let us face our life with its joys and sorrows supported by these great sentiments that Paul offers to us. By having an experience of them we will realize how true are the words the Apostle himself wrote: “I know whom I have believed, and I am sure that he is able to guard until that Day what has been entrusted to me”; in other words, until the Day (II Tm 1: 12) of our definitive meeting with Christ the Judge, Saviour of the world and our Saviour."

~ Pope Benedict XVI

w2.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/audiences/2006/documents/hf_ben-xvi_aud_20061108.html

“Gaudete in Domino semper - Rejoice in the Lord always (Phil 4: 4).”

“Christian joy thus springs from this certainty: God is close, he is with me, he is with us, in joy and in sorrow, in sickness and in health, as a friend and faithful spouse. And this joy endures, even in trials, in suffering itself. It does not remain only on the surface; it dwells in the depths of the person who entrusts himself to God and trusts in him.”

~ Pope Benedict XVI

w2.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/angelus/2007/documents/hf_ben-xvi_ang_20071216.html

“… there is one great Friend, who is the author of the joy of all and who fills our hearts with a joy that surpasses all other joys and lasts a lifetime: he is Jesus.”

~ Pope Benedict XVI

w2.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/speeches/2012/december/documents/hf_ben-xvi_spe_20121220_acr.html

“Dear friends, today too the Risen One enters our homes and our hearts, even when, at times, the doors are closed. He enters giving joy and peace, life and hope, gifts we need for our human and spiritual rebirth. Only he can roll away those stones from the tombs in which all too often people seal themselves off from their own feelings, their own relationships, their own behaviour; stones that sanction death: division, enmity, resentment, envy, diffidence, indifference. Only he, the Living One, can give meaning to existence and enable those who are weary and sad, downhearted and drained of hope, to continue on their journey. This was the experience of the two disciples who were on their way from Jerusalem to Emmaus on Easter Day (cf. Lk 24:13-35). They were talking about Jesus but their sad looks (cf. v. 17), expressed their disappointed hopes, uncertainty and melancholy. They had left their homeland to follow Jesus with his friends and had discovered a new reality in which forgiveness and love were no longer only words but had a tangible effect on life. Jesus of Nazareth had made all things new, he had transformed their life. But now he was dead and it all seemed to be over.”

~ Pope Benedict XVI

"With Jesus’ arrival the disciple’s situation of anguish changes radically. He enters through closed doors, he stands in their midst and gives them the peace that reassures: “Peace to you” (Jn 20:19b). It is a common greeting but it now acquires new significance because it brings about an inner change; it is the Easter greeting that enables the disciples to overcome all fear. The peace that Jesus brings is the gift of salvation that he had promised in his farewell discourses: “peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid” (Jn 14:27).

On this day of the Resurrection he gives it in fullness and for the community it becomes a source of joy, the certainty of victory, and security in relying on God. “Let not your hearts be troubled”, (Jn 14:1), do not be afraid, he also says to us."

~ Pope Benedict XVI

“In Jerusalem they hear the news of Jesus’ Resurrection and, in turn, they recount their own experience, on fire with love for the Risen One who has opened their hearts to an uncontainable joy. As St Peter says, they were “born anew to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead” (cf. 1 Pet 1:3). Indeed, the enthusiasm of faith, love for the community, the need to communicate the Good News was reborn within them. The Teacher is risen and with him all life is reborn; witnessing to this event becomes an irrepressible need for them.”

~ Pope Benedict XVI

w2.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/audiences/2012/documents/hf_ben-xvi_aud_20120411.html
 
"“Gaudete in Domino semper”, St Paul wrote: “Rejoice in the Lord always” (Phil 4:4). True joy is not a fruit of “divertirsi” [having a good time] understood in the etymological sense of the word di-vertere (di-version), that is, shirking the commitments of life and one’s responsibilities.

True joy is linked to something deeper. Of course, in the all too often frenetic pace of daily life it is important to find time for rest and relaxation, but true joy is linked to our relationship with God. Those who have encountered Christ in their own lives feel a serenity and joy in their hearts that no one and no situation can take from them. St Augustine understood this very well; in his quest for truth, peace and joy, after seeking them in vain in many things he concluded with his famous words: “and our heart is restless until it rests in God” (cf. Confessions, I, 1, 1).

True joy is not merely a passing state of mind or something that can be achieved with the person’s own effort; rather it is a gift, born from the encounter with the living Person of Jesus and, making room within ourselves, from welcoming the Holy Spirit who guides our lives. It is the invitation of the Apostle Paul who says: “May the God of peace himself sanctify you wholly; and may your spirit and soul and body be kept sound and blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ (1 Thess 5:23)."

~ Pope Benedict XVI

w2.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/angelus/2011/documents/hf_ben-xvi_ang_20111211.html
 
““To gaze upon Christ!” If we do this, we realize that Christianity is more than and different from a moral code, from a series of requirements and laws. It is the gift of a friendship that lasts through life and death: “No longer do I call you servants, but friends” (Jn 15:15), the Lord says to his disciples. We entrust ourselves to this friendship. Yet precisely because Christianity is more than a moral system, because it is the gift of friendship, for this reason it also contains within itself great moral strength, which is so urgently needed today on account of the challenges of our time. If with Jesus Christ and his Church we constantly re-read the Ten Commandments of Sinai, entering into their full depth, then a great, valid and lasting teaching unfolds before us. The Ten Commandments are first and foremost a “yes” to God, to a God who loves us and leads us, who carries us and yet allows us our freedom: indeed, it is he who makes our freedom real (the first three commandments). It is a “yes” to the family (fourth commandment), a “yes” to life (fifth commandment), a “yes” to responsible love (sixth commandment), a “yes” to solidarity, to social responsibility and to justice (seventh commandment), a “yes” to truth (eighth commandment) and a “yes” to respect for other people and for what is theirs (ninth and tenth commandments). By the strength of our friendship with the living God we live this manifold “yes” and at the same time we carry it as a signpost into this world of ours today.”

~ Pope Benedict XVI 8 September 2007

““I want them to understand that it is beautiful to be a Christian! The generally prevailing idea is that Christians have to observe an immense number of commandments, prohibitions, precepts, and other such restrictions, so that Christianity is a heavy and oppressive way of living, and it would therefore be more liberating to live without all these burdens. But I would like to make it clear that to be sustained by this great Love and God’s sublime revelation is not a burden, but rather a set of wings—that it is truly beautiful to be a Christian. It is an experience that gives us room to breathe and move, but most of all, it places us within a community since, as Christians, we are never alone: first of all, there is God, who is always with us; secondly, we are always forming a great community among ourselves: a community of people together on a journey, a community with a project for the future. All of this means that we are empowered to live a life worth living. This is the joy of being a Christian: that it is beautiful and right to believe!””

~ Pope Benedict XVI 2005

(quotes snipped from Vatican website: vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/homilies/2006/documents/hf_ben-xvi_hom_20060108_battesimo_en.html

vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/audiences/2012/documents/hf_ben-xvi_aud_20120516_en.html
 
"Day by day, man experiences many greater or lesser hopes, different in kind according to the different periods of his life. Sometimes one of these hopes may appear to be totally satisfying without any need for other hopes. Young people can have the hope of a great and fully satisfying love; the hope of a certain position in their profession, or of some success that will prove decisive for the rest of their lives. When these hopes are fulfilled, however, it becomes clear that they were not, in reality, the whole. It becomes evident that man has need of a hope that goes further. It becomes clear that only something infinite will suffice for him, something that will always be more than he can ever attain.

…

Let us say once again: we need the greater and lesser hopes that keep us going day by day. But these are not enough without the great hope, which must surpass everything else. This great hope can only be God, who encompasses the whole of reality and who can bestow upon us what we, by ourselves, cannot attain. The fact that it comes to us as a gift is actually part of hope. God is the foundation of hope: not any god, but the God who has a human face and who has loved us to the end, each one of us and humanity in its entirety. His Kingdom is not an imaginary hereafter, situated in a future that will never arrive; his Kingdom is present wherever he is loved and wherever his love reaches us. His love alone gives us the possibility of soberly persevering day by day, without ceasing to be spurred on by hope, in a world which by its very nature is imperfect. His love is at the same time our guarantee of the existence of what we only vaguely sense and which nevertheless, in our deepest self, we await: a life that is “truly” life."

~ Pope Benedict XVI Spe Salvi

w2.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/encyclicals/documents/hf_ben-xvi_enc_20071130_spe-salvi.html
 
nuntym said:
The second step is to realize that to be free is to be limited, because to be free is to make choices. In other words, the most basic and greatest act of freedom is to give itself away. When you choose to go to the library, you are not free anymore to go to the mall. When you choose to fast, you are not anymore free to eat. When you choose to get married, you are not free anymore to be romantically inclined to anybody else.
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You made some great points, however I have to disagree with this statement. The beauty of our God given free will is that after you choose to go to the library you can still change your mind and go to the mall. When you fast you can at any time exercise your freedom and choose to eat (which ends the fast). Also when you are married you are still free to be romantically inclined to anybody else (even though it would be sinful). Free will is an amazing gift.
 
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