Is DH "whipped?"

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Your marriage is so great and happy that you need to look at other women in various of undress…huh? Yeah that makes sense. My gosh Jay after 19 years of marriage you’d think you’d respect your wife’s dignity a little more.
I’m very surprised that you find the need to mention this here? Not something I would boast about!
Good Lord Man! This is NOTHING to be proud of! And It does not make your wife ‘woman of the year’ because she’s ok with it!
Sorry, but most women who love God and respected themselves would be HORRIFIED if their husbands went to places like this!
I know MY husband would NEVER consider a place like this and if he did, well… lets say, it would be a LONG time before I considered talking to him again!
Did I say anywhere that I went into or willingly tagged along to one of these places?? NO
Did I say anywhere that I WOULD go??? NO
Did I say that I “needed” to see other women?? NO
(Please don’t try & read into my relationship, or make assumptions/judgements about my level of respect for my wife.)

I was not “boasting”, just stating that IF the situation arose that IF I was “out with the guys” and via carpooling/taxi we wound up at a place like this, I wouldn’t have to fear bodily harm or banishment to the couch for a month just by being in the proximity of a strip-club, or guys that may like going into one.
(This is why my wife is considered “cool” with the other guys on the crew)

She KNOWS that if I was driving, or asked to meet there I would either say “Find another driver, or find another place”… as a rider I’d not go in, and either call a cab, or stop into a different pub with the 2 or 3 of the other “married old-farts” and still be home early or in time for dinner.
It’s not that DH is inconsiderate of me. He calls me, too. It’s just that I almost always say, “Of course you can do that.” (We’re talking about when the guys want to go see a movie - no Hooters involved. ) He doesn’t ask very often.
Thank You! Can I assume you say it’s OK because he doesn’t abuse the privilege, and you trust him?

Just two weeks ago we had a guy leave the shop. On his last day I was working with him and one other guy. The “other” guy suggested we (3 of us) go out for a good burger. After lunch he picked up the tab for the three of us…!:eek:

Total shock… why - because he is “whupped” - admits it, and everyone knows it.
And to prove it, later that afternoon (at precisely 2:15pm, afternoon coffee time, as usual) off goes his phone. His wife calling in and checking up on him. After all the “Yes, dears”, he told her that it was “Fred’s last day, and he bought lunch for him, me and himself at the burger joint… about $25 dear.”
I thought the cell phone would melt! She was hollering SO LOUD that we could hear it across the table. Watching this guy get verbally assaulted was embarrassing… for us!

Buying a guy lunch on his last day, then getting clobbered in public and going back to work with tail between the legs is whupped.
The occasional “Hon, the guys are going to stop after work and have a beer… is it OK???”… and getting “ABSOLUTELY NOT, I know what you/those guys do - I want you HOME on time!” is whupped.
Having your phone go off everyday at a precise time, and having your daily demands downloaded to you… is whupped.
Being fitted for a ring in your nose, instead of around your finger… is whupped.
 
I think you’re lucky that your hubby is so considerate of your feelings and opinions. —KCT
 
Ok, I need to rant here and get something off my chest…

DH just started a new job recently and so things have been hectic. We’re tired, busy, etc…not to mention trying to find a house, getting pre-approved for a home loan, I’m looking for a new job…well, you get the idea…

Anyways, at work earlier this week, DH was asked if he wanted 2 tickets to see a baseball game that were being given out at work. A bunch of his coworkers were going to the game as well. He called me to see if I wanted to go. I really didn’t feel like it but told him I would’ve gone if he really wanted too. DH said he didn’t really want to and would only go if I wanted to (this is how many of our conversations go, lol, neither of us really wanting to go somewhere but making sure that the other one honestly doesn’t want to go either). So he declined the tickets.

Well, the other day at work, some coworkers asked why he didn’t want to go. He said it was b/c I really didn’t feel like it (which makes me think he actually wanted to, but didn’t wanna force me to go) and the coworkers starting whispering and laughing to each other. :mad: Later on in the work day, they were talking about chipping in money for some work event, and a coworker made a joke to my DH saying “are you sure your wife is gonna let you have 2 dollars for that?” AAARGH!!! I hate it when people say my DH is whipped just b/c he takes into consideration what I do and don’t wanna do! Isn’t that supposed to be how a marriage works? That one person doesn’t always have the say-so, but a give-and-take? I would honestly say that we give in to what the other one wants about 50/50, but so many people say that my DH is “whipped” that maybe I am overbearing??? 🤷 His best friend made a joke once that he was “whipped” b/c DH wanted to treat me and his best friend and wife to an expensive restaurant (Outback steakhouse) but we really don’t have the money, so I told him no. I offered a compromise that we go to a less expensive restaurant and DH gave in to me and ever since then, his friend says he’s “whipped”.

So, am I the one that wears the pants in this relationship??? Is my DH “whipped”? :hypno: :bowdown:
I hate the term ‘whipped.’:mad: Ugh…it’s such a disrespectful term, usually used by men who are disrespectful to women.😉 Don’t sweat it…but be mindful to not always say no…and you’ll be fine.
 
I hate the term ‘whipped.’:mad: Ugh…it’s such a disrespectful term, usually used by men who are disrespectful to women.😉 Don’t sweat it…but be mindful to not always say no…and you’ll be fine.
Actually if I was friends with you and your husband, knowing what you wrote, I might call him whipped just to get a rise out of you. 😛 😉
 
I hate the term ‘whipped.’:mad: Ugh…it’s such a disrespectful term, usually used by men who are disrespectful to women.😉 Don’t sweat it…but be mindful to not always say no…and you’ll be fine.
Agreed, it is not being “whipped” it is being married. Truly married. Others should try it, they may like it!
 
So, am I the one that wears the pants in this relationship??? Is my DH “whipped”? :hypno: :bowdown:
DH’s are always whipped. Guys have accepted it, women need to learn to accept it, too.
 
To the original poster,

A couple random thoughts in response to your question
  1. It’s a ballgame. Part of being a guy is to assume that other guys will always participate in organized sports if given the opportunity, especially if there are free tickets.
Of course, guys don’t always universally want to go, but hey, those are the rules, and your DH will stand out for saying he’s not going.
  1. Teasing is a part of male bonding. He can’t go to the game to bond, so he gets teased about not going.
  2. He checked with you and you both said, “only if you want to go.” This sounds like your pattern of communicating with each other. Has there been any established mode of communication in your relationship where one of you can offer to allow the other to go without you? “Honey, I don’t really want to go, but if you do, have a good time without me” kind thing?
  3. I don’t think DH is whipped. And it’s nice he called. 🙂
 
Actually if I was friends with you and your husband, knowing what you wrote, I might call him whipped just to get a rise out of you. 😛 😉
LOL 😃 You know, not a friend of my husband has ever said that to him–we have pretty much always been pretty liberal with our separate social lives…the separate social lives should never exceed the time we spend together, not even remotely…but I have always been the type of wife that doesn’t say much about him grabbing a beer with his boss, or old friend…or something like this. But, at the same time, we both know boundaries…and that it should not be a frequent thing.
 
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