Hi,
I have a bit of a problem. I have a friend who was born into the Catholic faith (we both grew up in the same Catholic parish) and has been practising off and on. He’s married a Catholic and has three children. However, he:
- doesn’t believe in transubstantiation
- does not believe in venerating Mary nor praying to saints
- attends Sunday Mass with his family but does not receive Holy Communion
- does not believe that confession is necessary for the forgiveness of sins
- (his words) “tolerates” statues in his house for peace with his wife
- believes in the rapture, tribulation, etc…
I’ve already asked the obvious question: why are you Catholic? The reply is around “I want peace in the family”, “I like the sacramental nature”, etc…
I have stopped short of saying to him that he’s not Catholic, because I’m not sure.
What do you think? Is he really Catholic?
As others have said, he is Catholic by virtue of his baptism, however, like our protestant brothers and sisters it appears he is in “imperfect” communion with the Church.
To address the specifics you list above:
=doesn’t believe in transubstantiation
=attends Sunday Mass with his family but does not receive Holy Communion
I must commend his consistency here. It appears that for the sake of his wife and children he is attending mass, but cannot in good conscience partake of a communion he does not agree with. I give him good marks for this.
The best you can do here is to try to gently discuss these matters with him and, over time, perhaps he will come around.
=does not believe in venerating Mary nor praying to saints
=(his words) “tolerates” statues in his house for peace with his wife
The thing to remember about praying to saints (or to Mary) is that the Church does not mandate this. It is strictly a personal devotion (except for the general references in the mass). So if your friend does not feel comfortable with such intercessory prayer, I would not press the matter.
Same with the matter of “venerating Mary”. So long as he doesn’t “bad mouth” church teaching on the matter, I’d leave this one alone. If he does bad mouth, or if he has beliefs based on wrong information, by all means try to correct his misunderstandings. But beyond that I would suggest that ones level of devotion to Mary is more of a private nature.
=does not believe that confession is necessary for the forgiveness of sins
Well we have problems with a lot of Catholics on this one. Confession has fallen out of regular use for a great many Catholics. There are certain arguments you can use for this such as Jesus’ statement to the Apostles "Who’s sins you forgive they are forgiven. Who’s sins you retain they are retained. - How can the priest retain or forgive if you don’t tell him?
=believes in the rapture, tribulation, etc…
Well there are others here better qualified to address these.
My one suggestion would be, since he has obviously read or listened to the case for these beliefs, ask him if he has read or listened to the case against these beliefs.
Overall, it sounds as though your friend is basically a “non-catholic” Christian in his heart who is remaining within the Church structure for the sake of his wife and more importantly his children. I commend him for this. He is thinking of them more than himself.
Hopefully with time, he will see the errors of his current thinking and come home to full communion with the Church.
Peace
James