Is it a Mortal Sin when homeschooled teenager consistently refuses to do his schoolwork

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Just a thought - I’m wondering if for some reason, in his mind he sees learning/school work pointless? Pointless as in what’s the point? Im not going to get a job due to a,b,c reasons? High unemployment rate, lack of available jobs in your area, general despondency regarding the future in general? If these are his reasons, then perhaps he is not rebelling against his parents, but life in general?
 
Bravo.

Could also be he might have a slight learning disability, and he can’t focus properly on his work.

Lots of things could cause a young man to become disinterested in things.

I’m not sure it helps to assume mortal sin.
 
You are right with regards to just assuming it is a mortal Sin
But he gives us no real answers with which we can move forward to help him.

So I feel completely inept at finding a solution, except to pray…
 
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I have been thinking about what it is like to be 15. Do you have a separate space for your son to do his studies and his schoolwork, away from his younger siblings and with some privacy? I would have really resented, at that age, being required to sit at the same table as my younger siblings while doing my work. Most teens that age would, I believe. On the other hand, if you offered to send him to public school, it may be too daunting to him to think about. He may feel he doesn’t have the skills needed to navigate that environment? He may feel stuck in the middle…between being with the younger kids, and not feeling public school would work out. Just a thought.
 
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Four days out of the week, I drop off my oldest daughter (17) and my son at a very nice public library so they can do their work in peace (they have a small room that is only for teens.
They are there from 10 am until 2:30-3 pm.

They both had stated that they enjoyed that

And on the 5th day, the two oldest are allowed to do their work in separate areas in the living room away from the kitchen table and the younger children…
 
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Maria7377 said:
And he still does his chores.
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If he does his chores, he has somehow come to the modern culture’s opinion (heresy) that learning and study are self chosen and self directed.
But school is a chore, after a fashion, where the teacher (master, rabbi) assigns chores that put the student’s reasoning and knowing in order, just like vacuuming the carpet helps put a home in order.

There are external chores and internal chores. When older it is harder to accept this - a young child can practise addition or spelling or reading all day as a task or chore, but the older we get, we think it is whether we believe in what we want to study rather than recognising our teacher as our master and “assigner of chores.”

John Martin
 
And as for public school, he, as well as my other children have never expressed a desire to go there, it is quite the opposite.

My son gets very uneasy around a lot of strangers…
 
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Maria7377 said:
They are there from 10 am until 2:30-3 pm.
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That is a long time each day to not have interaction with peers and without adult interaction for learning. I am sure he likes the independence, but I would have had difficulty maintining that set-up week after week at 15. I would have felt the development of my emotional intelligence had been put on the shelf (though I doubt I would have been able to articulate it that way. )
 
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Could cyberschool be an option? Other than going to the library, does he have other activities? any hobbies? Play sports?
 
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Well, we spend a great deal of time together every day. We go to daily Mass almost every day, except Saturdays, and we spend a lot of time discussing many things: theology, morality, current events, etc. And he is at the library with his sister. And this had only been for the last several months.
But again, if he really wants to be at home, he has said nothing about it
 
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Remember you are basically asking if your son’s not doing his homework will send him to hell…

This is a sad consequence of past Catholic legalism in regards to Mortal Sin.

Of course I believe in Mortal Sin. But a certain legalism lingers on. Just read today that in the past, some theologians even made a distinction between how many ears of corn someone could steal before it turned from a Venial Sin into a Mortal Sin. Crazy!
 
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Whether it’s mortal sin or not should be on his mind rather than yours.

As for the apathy toward school work, have you tried varying the type of schoolwork or manner in which it’s done? This is an age where what we have traditionally labeled “learning styles” tend to shift and reshape, which means the mode of schooling that worked previously may no longer be effective.
 
Tell him to get a job over the summer. That should get him some direction.
 
I would suggest that you make him get a job and start to make his own way in the world.
 
At 15? There are laws against that.
I wou l d suggest some detective work! Does he have a learning dis ability? Does he have a dream job? What education does that involve? Is he just rebelling? Rebellion while unpleasant is helping him with becoming the man he needs to be. It does not need to be accepted but it needs tto be understood.
 
We didn’t homeschool at 15, but that’s when rebellion begins to set in, as a practical matter. And yes, he does need to start thinking about going out on his own.

He needs to get a job, and he also needs to be evaluated for learning disability. Did something happen to him at the library? Surely his sister would have told you if something had happened? If they’re there that much of a stretch of time, what do they do for lunch?

Investigate the Multiple Intelligences. He could actually be a Kinesthetic learner.

Blessings,
Mrs Cloisters OP
Lay Dominican
http://cloisters.tripod.com/
http://cloisters.tripod.com/charity/
http://cloisters.tripod.com/holyangels/id9.html/
 
It seems entirely natural that a 15 year old boy would rebel against the suffocating restrictions of being homeschooled by his mother in the company of his younger siblings. He is a young man and needs to be encouraged to spread his wings and make friends away from parental apron strings. The more you nag him, the deeper he will dig in his heels so I would forget homeschooling for a bit and try to get him a job where he can take a breather and decide want HE wants to do…Refusing to take part in homeschooling is not a mortal sin, it’s a cry for help - and if you don’t listen to him, and allow him some autonomy and space to grow, you will lose him…Treat him like the young adult he is fast becoming, not as a naughty boy over the summer and things may be a lot clearer by the start of the next school year.
 
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