Is it morally permissible to cuddle with someone of the opposite sex?

[myelin]

You might want to establish yourself with something that would show some competency…other then that your post is uncharitable

go ahead and pic something out and we will get to the bottom of this right now. I’m not interested in reading gay lobbying in a spiritual forum…OR a fraidy cat to see what it is…for having fun chatting and…popularity.

 

[myelin]

Why are words like homosexual gay coming on public talking …and not private?

exactly.

or at very least a separate area for good organizing…

 

[thewanderer]

You might want to establish yourself with something that would show some competency…other then that your post is uncharitable

go ahead and pic something out and we will get to the bottom of this right now. I’m not interested in reading gay lobbying in a spiritual forum…OR a fraidy cat to see what it is…for having fun chatting and…popularity.

I’m sorry that you think my post was uncharitable. I am just genuinely confused. Maybe I’m missing something huge but I really don’t understand where your post came from or how it relates to this thread at all. This thread is not about promoting the gay agenda, its a question about what forms of physical affection are appropriate and in what relationships they are appropriate.

 

[myelin]

I’m sorry that you think my post was uncharitable. I am just genuinely confused. Maybe I’m missing something huge but I really don’t understand where your post came from or how it relates to this thread at all. This thread is not about promoting the gay agenda, its a question about what forms of physical affection are appropriate and in what relationships they are appropriate.

then why is the gay and homosexual word all over the place…along with whats ok in same sex through culture ideas? why is that the focus ?

why are these things straight and gay being deliberately mixed in together?

its out of order.

 

[thewanderer]

then why is the gay and homosexual word all over the place…along with whats ok in same sex through culture ideas? why is that the focus ?

why are these things straight and gay being deliberately mixed in together?

its out of order.

Its talking about a scenario where romantic feelings are not involved. The original scenario was a homosexual man and a heterosexual woman. The question was whether it would be appropriate for them to cuddle in a non-romantic relationship. Because the original scenario was talking about a non-romantic relationship people brought up other examples of cuddling in non-romantic relationships to compare them. For heterosexual people this means bringing up the example of heterosexual people of the same gender cuddling each other or hugging each other or showing each other physical signs of affection. But throughout the whole point of this thread has been trying to determine whether or not cuddling can be appropriate as a sign of affection in a non-romantic relationship.

 

[myelin]

Its talking about a scenario where romantic feelings are not involved. The original scenario was a homosexual man and a heterosexual woman. The question was whether it would be appropriate for them to cuddle in a non-romantic relationship. Because the original scenario was talking about a non-romantic relationship people brought up other examples of cuddling in non-romantic relationships to compare them. For heterosexual people this means bringing up the example of heterosexual people of the same gender cuddling each other or hugging each other or showing each other physical signs of affection. But throughout the whole point of this thread has been trying to determine whether or not cuddling can be appropriate as a sign of affection in a non-romantic relationship.

How conveniently arrived at out of the OP.

What a surprise:thumbsup:

everybody talking about huggy huggy with same sex person, entwined with idea’s of mating…just what I was hoping to envision.

 

[thewanderer]

How conveniently arrived at out of the OP.

What a surprise:thumbsup:

everybody talking about huggy huggy with same sex person, entwined with idea’s of mating…just what I was hoping to envision.

I really do not appreciate your snide implications. First you come on here and claim I am incompetent, then you imply I am part of the gay lobby, and try to goad me by insinuating I many be a “fraidy cat” and implying that I am here on CAF for the sake of my own ego by “gaining popularity” All while claiming that my genuine confusion was uncharitable. Then, when I try to explain myself to you you ignore everything I say and assume I am lying about whats going on here. If your future replies to me continue to be uncharitable I will be forced to report your posts to the mods as such behaviour is against forum rules. This entire thread is about non-romantic relationships. I am sorry that you can’t see that, but that has been the whole point of this discussion.

 

[myelin]

I really do not appreciate your snide implications. First you come on here and claim I am incompetent, then you imply I am part of the gay lobby, and try to goad me by insinuating I many be a “fraidy cat” and implying that I am here on CAF for the sake of my own ego by “gaining popularity” All while claiming that my genuine confusion was uncharitable. Then, when I try to explain myself to you you ignore everything I say and assume I am lying about whats going on here. If your future replies to me continue to be uncharitable I will be forced to report your posts to the mods as such behaviour is against forum rules. This entire thread is about non-romantic relationships. I am sorry that you can’t see that, but that has been the whole point of this discussion.

thats ok to get angry with me, stuff matters so were on the same page. I don’t think at all you are some kind of gay lobby. My anger got worked up being directly challenged by a bi guy here who I would understand be comfortable cuddling with either sex, snuggling is what it is/ in support of where this thing is at. …and some other things already mentioned.

So I hope u see my overall has nothing to do with you but the authenticity of my first heading in entry tonight…What is going on here and so on. Other then that as just mentioned the trail has come to a destination as mentioned and with no surprise.

 

[CorieDreams]

I agree.

While reading the other posts, I was surprised no one else mentioned that two girls cuddling would be inappropriate as well.

Cuddling is an act reserved for family members and for marital relationships. It definitely is showing too much intimacy to cuddle with anyone other than one’s spouse or soon to be spouse… strait or gay, male or female.

Uhhh…says who? I snuggle ALL THE TIME with my galpals! We curl up under a blanket, legs sprawled everywhere, hug, snuggle…being related by blood doens’t mean anything I WOUDL NOT snuggle with a guy friend, but whats wrong with two best girl friends cuddleing and watching a scary movie? Gosh some people are so scared of affection!

 

[thewanderer]

thats ok to get angry with me, stuff matters so were on the same page. I don’t think at all you are some kind of gay lobby. My anger got worked up being directly challenged by a bi guy here who I would understand be comfortable cuddling with either sex, snuggling is what it is/ in support of where this thing is at. …and some other things already mentioned.

So I hope u see my overall has nothing to do with you but the authenticity of my first heading in entry tonight…What is going on here and so on. Other then that as just mentioned the trail has come to a destination as mentioned and with no surprise.

The OP asked about the morality of cuddling in a non-romantic way for non-romantic friendships. You replied with a diatribe against everyone with any sort of same-sex attraction and made it clear that you think that all such people should be shunned. At which point a happily married bisexual man who believes in the Church’s teachings on sexuality asked you why you thought he should be shunned, and now you are accusing him of believing that same-sex relationships are ok??? I’m sorry but you are making waaaay too many assumptions here and jumping all over the place. There is no reason to shun someone just because they suffer from same-sex attraction. And there is no reason to assume that ProdigalSon believes anything other than Church teaching just because he asked you think it is appropriate to shun people simply because they have a different temptation than you.

 

[myelin]

The OP asked about the morality of cuddling in a non-romantic way for non-romantic friendships. You replied with a diatribe against everyone with any sort of same-sex attraction and made it clear that you think that all such people should be shunned. At which point a happily married bisexual man who believes in the Church’s teachings on sexuality asked you why you thought he should be shunned, and now you are accusing him of believing that same-sex relationships are ok??? I’m sorry but you are making waaaay too many assumptions here and jumping all over the place. There is no reason to shun someone just because they suffer from same-sex attraction. And there is no reason to assume that ProdigalSon believes anything other than Church teaching just because he asked you think it is appropriate to shun people simply because they have a different temptation than you.

1. can u please use specific quotes in order to argue the suggested attitude.

your trying to build an argument without bringing along any evidence.

 

[myelin]

Uhhh…says who? I snuggle ALL THE TIME with my galpals! We curl up under a blanket, legs sprawled everywhere, hug, snuggle…being related by blood doens’t mean anything I WOUDL NOT snuggle with a guy friend, but whats wrong with two best girl friends cuddleing and watching a scary movie? Gosh some people are so scared of affection!

thats right and I already mentioned yesterday girls are different.

There is a very big difference between men and women, and its not even nearly, all culture related, its DNA and thousands of years in evolution concerning survival and fear issues etc etc.

 

[thewanderer]

Hello my lovely fellow Catholics.

This is something I’ve been wondering about. I have a gay male friend (I’m a girl) who is very affectionate. He seems to be the cuddly type.** I’m just wondering, what are the moral guidelines for physical, nonromantic **affection? I have cuddled with boyfriends in the past with no problems of going too far, or things getting out of hand. For whatever reason, the thought of cuddling with someone I’m not in a relationship with seems kind of wrong–but then again, if it is devoid of sexual stimulation enough to be permissible in a romantic, dating relationship, shouldn’t it be permissible as affection between friends?

Granted, I understand that this probably has potential negative emotional/social repercussions, but I’m struggling with the bigger topic of “morality of affection”, as it were. After all, merely dating someone doesn’t change the degree of permissible physicality–only marriage does that!

Here is the OP, I have highlighted the relevant parts which show that the OP is clearly asking about a non-romantic display of affection among two people who are not romantically interested in each other.

the first thing I would say is how do you know for a fact that he is gay…and not just saying it -to get your guard down… and in what you think has nothing to do with mating advance, and then the story changes, the story that always was.

second…how do you know for a fact that if above is untrue…that he then may be a bi guy? all the evidence suggests he is a bi guy…? no? then how come the friendship has welcomed an idea to start cuddling with this guy? The open willingness to cudle is out of a suggestion which you are agreeing is mutually somewhat arrived at…so you know…he would agree…so he has suggested it to you in some way acceptance, smiles whatever approval…these are getting at properties of mating. ( special special…cuddly cuddly

to be honest I think looking at the world a girl who would hang out with a bi guy…well I have no respect for that, “nothing to do with religeon” either a girl has some demands and some idea of a solid relationship or she does not…fillers along the way are extra luggage, can add nothing but confusion, keep from meeting who fits into the perfect or at least half decent guy. DC is 3% hiv positive…many women are becoming infected by men who do not tell them. There was a convention and the women are very sick… I’m single and spoken for…if a friend of mine said they met a girl who hung out with gay or bi guys…I’d tell them flat out the facts on known hugely promiscuous behavior and to be hugely cautious knowing anyone who hung out with that scene… Its crazy for straight to mingle socially and date the gay scene, cuddle whatever…crazy, any people who do , it becomes luggage emotionally and possible checking because things happen

Now…

Cuddling is part of mating, courtship…for example if a girl cuddles with some other guy then a boyfriend whatever…thats flat out cheating, and relationship OVER. Betray.If they cheat before even a marriage and all that…they will cheat on the honey moon itself.

Cuddling can mean different to a girl. But if your telling the truth it sounds more like your trying to win the guy over. no girl cuddles with a guy without something up there sleeve.Its a suggestion…so what are you trying to suggest, the guy protects you …you and him against the world prob.

So…

something about it is bugging you if this is the whole truth.

heres what it could be, besides all possibilities…

you are leading him on and have no intention of mentally being in conformity of your temporary need for a big squeeze…anyway I bet you may have already figured this out or would anyway. So your either leading the guy on…regardless if he’s gay…bi…whatever. Or…there is a “competition” going on between the two of you thats ego-conquer related…/opinion for now only and very politely said.

I admit, that most of this post is based on the assumption that the OP is talking about cuddling with a guy who wants to have sex with her rather than a diatribe against people with same-sex attraction, but in the bolded section you make it very clear that you think all people with same-sex attraction are sinful and ought to be shunned, so much so that you would not even be able to respect a heterosexual person who was friends with someone with same-sex attraction.

Can you clarify this? It seems that you’re making a lot of assumptions about bisexual men. Why would you assume that the OP is in a “relationship” with this guy? As a man who is attracted to both women and men, I’m just kind of at a loss here.

I don’t think it’s clear from the OP that this man is looking for sex. That doesn’t mean cuddling is a good idea, of course.

Here ProdigalSon merely asked for clarification, which is hardly an attack or a challenge, then pointed out the fact that your first post made all sorts of assumptions, admitted that he is at a loss, in other words, does not understand your post or else why you would post it. He even adds a caution against the idea that cuddling is a good idea.

I really don’t get your responses on this thread and think they are way out of proportion. Nobody on this thread has said anything to indicate they are part of some “gay agenda” nor does this thread have anything to do with romantic same-sex relationships. I think perhaps you should calm down and try reading through this again with a more objective point of view.

 

[myelin]

Here is the OP, I have highlighted the relevant parts which show that the OP is clearly asking about a non-romantic display of affection among two people who are not romantically interested in each other.

I admit, that most of this post is based on the assumption that the OP is talking about cuddling with a guy who wants to have sex with her rather than a diatribe against people with same-sex attraction, but in the bolded section you make it very clear that you think all people with same-sex attraction are sinful and ought to be shunned, so much so that you would not even be able to respect a heterosexual person who was friends with someone with same-sex attraction.

Here ProdigalSon merely asked for clarification, which is hardly an attack or a challenge, then pointed out the fact that your first post made all sorts of assumptions, admitted that he is at a loss, in other words, does not understand your post or else why you would post it. He even adds a caution against the idea that cuddling is a good idea.

I really don’t get your responses on this thread and think they are way out of proportion. Nobody on this thread has said anything to indicate they are part of some “gay agenda” nor does this thread have anything to do with romantic same-sex relationships. I think perhaps you should calm down and try reading through this again with a more objective point of view.

Why me ( just joking) hold on …I don’t know how to use the quote button and have only had comp for about 6 yrs and only for work messages…so I’m no pro and will have to go to get a notepad and copy out…maybe 14-16 min

 

[myelin]

Here is the OP, I have highlighted the relevant parts which show that the OP is clearly asking about a non-romantic display of affection among two people who are not romantically interested in each other.

I admit, that most of this post is based on the assumption that the OP is talking about cuddling with a guy who wants to have sex with her rather than a diatribe against people with same-sex attraction, but in the bolded section you make it very clear that you think all people with same-sex attraction are sinful and ought to be shunned, so much so that you would not even be able to respect a heterosexual person who was friends with someone with same-sex attraction.

Here ProdigalSon merely asked for clarification, which is hardly an attack or a challenge, then pointed out the fact that your first post made all sorts of assumptions, admitted that he is at a loss, in other words, does not understand your post or else why you would post it. He even adds a caution against the idea that cuddling is a good idea.

I really don’t get your responses on this thread and think they are way out of proportion. Nobody on this thread has said anything to indicate they are part of some “gay agenda” nor does this thread have anything to do with romantic same-sex relationships. I think perhaps you should calm down and try reading through this again with a more objective point of view.

Shun…To avoid deliberately; keep away from. Never used the word and never used the word sinful…and…have never acted this way toward anyone.

That has nothing to do with suggesting a person on the single scene socializing -cuddly style with a gay person is not wise, for explained reasons…heres another reason…

a) the only involvement a man has with a women who is married to another man is positive things in the direction and flourish of the on-going marriasge…check.

b) the only involvement a Christian has with a Bi or Gay person is in the full ready and hopeful encouraging possibilities for a path toward ordered longings and idea’s…

therefore in a social single scene where people are

• young
  -drink
  -new to emotions
• hoping to find a real partner

the socializing is somewhat illogical and a bad idea.

if this thread thinks a Christians involvement is “not interested” -in a gay or bi persons working through the inclination in a positive way, and it fully changes the association?..then I’m in the wrong place. (This is where the self needs to be put aside.

 

[CorieDreams]

b) the only involvement a christian has with a bi or gay person is in the full ready and hopeful encouraging possibilities for a path toward ordered longings and idea’s…
.

how about no.

 

[myelin]

how about no.

then the position encorages, supports, admires homosexual tendencies and

if not a homosexual

is in conflict with… love thy neighbor as thyself.

plus another reply leaving out all context and looking for argue.

 

[myelin]

Ok so I’m not here to argue with a group of gay advocates and do not enjoy this…also its not my fault this Ed is what it is today , together with the gay movement. I will be checking back in honor of my entries in a day or so… so if the tomatoes start flying at my stuff…I will defend in the continued polite way.

 

[myelin]

Ok so I’m not here to argue with a group in seen tone… and do not enjoy this…also its not my fault this Ed is what it is today , together with the gay movement. I will be checking back in honor of my entries in a day or so… so if the tomatoes start flying at my stuff…I will defend in the continued polite way.

 

[Lasting_faith]

Someone did open the box of Pandora. What we did was lean on each other while talking with others, fall a sleep in front of the TV, sometimes just for fun holding hands while walking outside, and sleep in the same bed twice, and I can assure you all that there was nothing wrong going on. If it is wrong what we did, what is right? To show feelings is never wrong, and I do think that sense combined with strong faith is well enough to prevent any “disaster”.

If we constantly keep an eye on what we can’t do and what may be wrong we will get crazy. Everything is not wrong, it will not lead to conduct that is OK only in a marriege, a simple way of being close, but not “intimate” is not wrong. A friendship between a boy and a girl, or a man and a woman, where both parts do show affection as “friends do” is not wrong. If we doubt our strength it can be wrong, I do admit that, but I think that we need a stronger faith if we all the time are in need of checking out what is wrong, what right. It is a bit like driving a car, We are making one mistake every minute and we can only see five different things each minute when we drive, and still most of us make it without any mishaps. All we need is a faith strong enough, and we are safe. If our faith is weak we need to always ask us self “is this a sin, can this lead to a sin, is this OK” and completely stop living, or work on our faith. I think that the words of Christ is what we need to hear, “one without a sin may cast the first stone”. For heaven’s sake, when will people understand that there really is not any sin always lurking in the corner? It is very common that people when they meet, give a kiss on the cheek, nothing wrong with that, so please be reasonable and stop seekin sin where there are non.