Is it ok for a gay couple to adopt?

[Bella3502]

While reading this site, I often cringe at the lack of critical thinking, or poor analysis, but this is just depressing.

Just who the hell do you all think you are?

You can’t judge all gay people like that.

The bigotry here is astounding.

Stop demonizing gay people.

Children are not stupid. They learn things. Their parents will teach them them how straight men and women interact. They will also explain that some people are gay, and are attracted to people of the same sex. They will also teach them (oh no oh no oh no!) not to judge people or be intolerant of them. Frankly, it seems this would be beneficial for some members of this site.

Yes, you can find bible passages to support gay intolerance, but you can do the same to support slavery, and this was done extensively to keep slaves in line.

I know you will ignore this and think your special, but please please at least try to step back and consider the possibility that history is once again repeating itself and some people (fine, not you, you’re ‘special’) have prejudice against gay people.

I’ve often heard the claim that homosexuality is a choice.

This always made me feel very inadequate.

Why?

Well, because no matter how hard I try, I can’t make myself gay.

I mean can you?

No one I’ve talked to can do it either.

Perhaps it’s just some weird disease spreading through our city that stops us from exercising the choice that everyone else has.

So tell me, can all you guys change your sexuality at will?

If not, may I humbly suggest you shut up until you can.

Just remember that most of what you read here on this topic just is not true. You have a few fanatics that think they know better than every one else. They are wrong and you must be mindful of where they come from.

Once again after reading drivel, I am reminded to be thankful that I live in America where the minority does not control the majority. There are gays in my church and they have children in the Catholic school. Everyone knows that they are gay. There are in church every Sunday. They are active in the school. One of the women is the Chair of their fundraising group. Their children are just a normal as the next. The ones that are having problems are the adopted children of an alcoholic SAHM…

But we won’t talk about that…

 

[fix]

You are discriminating against those who engage in homosexual behavior by denying them the right to marry the people they are romantically in love with.

There is no such right. Rights do not simply get invented.

If the 9/11 hijackers considered how their actions effected the real world we live in, and what it did to actual humans in terms of their feelings and their desires, (which is how I make decisions)

They, too, acted on their feelings and desires. That is why it was a form of moral relativism.

as opposed to a dogmatic obedience to their non-debateable religious authority which is not constrained by any rationality or humanistic morality (which is what I am asking you not to do), then they would not have smashed those planes into the world trade centers.

If they accepted the Truth they would never have done such an act.

Again, not trying to offend anyone, but historically it’s true. Unless you just want to chalk up entire historical groups of people as plain evil, well, then we have differing views on human nature. I hold responsible the leaders who dupe the masses, not the sheep who follow them off the cliff. Again, not talking about your religion, just every other religion that has ever existed on the face of this earth, more or less.

Like Stalin or Pot or Mao?

 

[Jay2]

I was recently discussing with someone whether or not it is ok for gay parents to adopt children.

NO.

 

[Pete99]

Homosexuals are human beings, members of our one human family.
It is easy to know and quote church teaching. It is also,most of the time, easy to believe it when you understand the “why” behind it.
However,
It is much more difficult to apply it with love and justice when you are face to face with real people.
I don’t disagree with Catholic teaching on homosexuality and its related issues, but I do disagree with the intended or uninteded lack of charity that eminates from so many people when discussing this subject.
Conversion is the job of the Holy Spirit. To love our neighbor is the “job” that Jesus left us with.

 

[Dee_Dee_King]

i would rather be raised in red china than by a gay couple.

 

[thistle]

Homosexuals are human beings, members of our one human family.
It is easy to know and quote church teaching. It is also,most of the time, easy to believe it when you understand the “why” behind it.
However,
It is much more difficult to apply it with love and justice when you are face to face with real people.
I don’t disagree with Catholic teaching on homosexuality and its related issues, but I do disagree with the intended or uninteded lack of charity that eminates from so many people when discussing this subject.
Conversion is the job of the Holy Spirit. To love our neighbor is the “job” that Jesus left us with.

I don’t think anyone in this thread has said they don’t like people who are gay. Its their sexual activity we don’t like because its wrong and a sin.
For example, I have a son. Now this is only made up but if he turned to a life of crime I would hate and condemn his activities but still love my son.

 

[littleone]

I don’t think it is ever right for a church to support discrimination against minority groups. It seems that we are taking a big brush and painting all gays as morally depraved. I agree some are, but to apply those term to the entire group is unfair.
To deny marriage to gay couples … have been marginalized and oppresed in the name of religion. Unfortunately the church rejected him (my brother). I think it is time to welcome all God’s people back into the fold.

I know, I’m not in compliance with church teaching. But I feel church teaching on this issue is in error.

Tu Amigo, Pablo

I wonder is our church discriminating against minority groups in the main frame of thinking about groups who are marginalised? In this case and ones like it I don’t think so, I believe that the church is saying that the bible gives clear point of fact that ever since Noah and those who laughed at him for building the boat, that it was God’s intention that all people should stay away from un natural SEXUAL RELATIONS

If it is right for two of the same sex to build a sexual relation together then you are saying that God did not build a relationship between man and woman with the idea of child bearing, because predominently that is what sexual relationships is about.

The building of a relationship where God can show His children that although He doesn’t need the children to have sexual relations to bring children into the world it is His plan that they bind together to involve themself with God’s desire to be included in the recreation of God’s next generation. Do you not think that that is God’s plan?

In all the children I have counselled I can honestly say that out of 100 cases of ( male )children who have tendencies to relate more to the same sex, only 3 maybe 4 children were not sexually molest when they were young.
That is the sad case. The only way for these male o be given their lives back is to take them through a forgiveness process.
On most occasions these young men have a very soft tendency and relate more in the female trait than the male.
In many cases also there are tendencies for very bad spirits to enter the children (young men).
It is not the churches fault if you wish to blame at all. It is firstly satan, and his using governments who impliment the equal rights etc to cover up the truth.
We fight not against each other but against principalities of darkness.

God bless
littleone

 

[boppaid]

Many foster homes are not “abusive” In fact a lot of work is put into by case works so that NO foster homes are abusive. I know our was not when we were foster parents. There are a lot of classes you have to take before becoming a foster parent here in Washington.

That is not true. I know two young girls who were SEVERELY abused in (count 'em…) THREE different foster homes. I know we as a society like to paint the “system” as fine. It is not.

 

[boppaid]

While there are no guarantees in life, who are we as a society to deny a child a mother or a father. To say that the unique gifts that each gender brings to the table is not important in a child’s development is a form of turning humanity into a commodity.
.

The sad reality is that some children who would have been adobpted by a loving gay couple may not find a home at all. I’d much rather 2 dads or 2 moms than none at all.

 

[boppaid]

Your thoughts are idealistic, indeed. But gays adopting children is not the optimum way to go. Until such time as we live in a perfect world, discrimination is going to happen.

This is especially true as I see so many people who teach their children this discrimination against gay people. It’s disgusting.

 

[cazayoux]

I don’t think anyone in this thread has said they don’t like people who are gay. Its their sexual activity we don’t like because its wrong and a sin.
For example, I have a son. Now this is only made up but if he turned to a life of crime I would hate and condemn his activities but still love my son.

I will say that I’m fed up with the force-feeding of the gay community on the rest of us.
You can barely find a television show that doesn’t have their gay quota in effect.

We picked a week to bring three of our boys (8,7,5) to Disney.
Had to change it because that is the week that the parks are overtaken by the community we are discussing.
The Disney guy on the phone stated that it isn’t a Disney-planned event, it’s just when that community decides to go.
He stated that there are rules in the park about lude behaviour no matter the makeup of the couple.
I’ve spoken with others that have been at Disney during that time who talked about how rampant the lude behaviour was.

I just don’t want to have to explain this to my young sons.

I have no doubt that the love between two people is real.
HOW that love is expressed physically is what I have a problem with.

When I do have a discussion with my boys, I will be explaining how God made our bodies and for what purpose, which is anything but about the self.

 

[pablo_rafael]

Many good points have been made and most of them in a respectful tone.

Without meaning to give offense to anyone let me just list a few comments made about gay couples, homosexual relationships and gays in general since the beginning of this thread.
“intrinsically disordered”
“grave depravity”
“abusive”
“twisted”
“violence”
“immoral”
“egocentric”
“immoral”
“failures”

If I were going to come up with a program of discrimination against a group, I would use just those words. Labling a group of people with these comments only fosters dicscrimination. I don’t feel that it is right for any people to use their religion as a justification for the oppression of an another group of people.

As a member of a minority group I have seen discrimination firsthand. The Civil rights struggle is not yet over in our world. I believe that rights for gay couples are part of that struggle for civil rights.

The anology about homosexual behavior compared to a life of crime isn’t very accurate in my opinion. Crime involves a deliberate choice where one person seeks to harm another for personal gain.

In my opinon a better analogy would be left-handedness. (Mt grandfather had his left hand tied behind his back at school so he would use his right hand because “The Bible says that the right hand is good; the left hand is evil”.) It is stretching the analogy I know, but my point is that I believe most gays don’t choose their orientation nor do they seek to harm someone else for personal gain. It is just the way they are.

If I am going to err, I will err on the side of acceptance and love. I do not want to be like the pharisees who erred on the side of judgement and self-righteousness.

Tu Amigo, Pablo

 

[thistle]

Many good points have been made and most of them in a respectful tone.

Without meaning to give offense to anyone let me just list a few comments made about gay couples, homosexual relationships and gays in general since the beginning of this thread.
“intrinsically disordered”
“grave depravity”
“abusive”
“twisted”
“violence”
“immoral”
“egocentric”
“immoral”
“failures”

If I were going to come up with a program of discrimination against a group, I would use just those words. Labling a group of people with these comments only fosters dicscrimination. I don’t feel that it is right for any people to use their religion as a justification for the oppression of an another group of people.

As a member of a minority group I have seen discrimination firsthand. The Civil rights struggle is not yet over in our world. I believe that rights for gay couples are part of that struggle for civil rights.

The anology about homosexual behavior compared to a life of crime isn’t very accurate in my opinion. Crime involves a deliberate choice where one person seeks to harm another for personal gain.

In my opinon a better analogy would be left-handedness. (Mt grandfather had his left hand tied behind his back at school so he would use his right hand because “The Bible says that the right hand is good; the left hand is evil”.) It is stretching the analogy I know, but my point is that** I believe most gays don’t choose their orientation** nor do they seek to harm someone else for personal gain. It is just the way they are.

If I am going to err, I will err on the side of acceptance and love. I do not want to be like the pharisees who erred on the side of judgement and self-righteousness.

Tu Amigo, Pablo

That’s simply not correct. Its not just the way they are.
People are not born gay. There is no gay gene.
People become homosexual as a result of their upbringing or product of their environment or largely by choice.

 

[LittleDeb]

In my opinon a better analogy would be left-handedness. (Mt grandfather had his left hand tied behind his back at school so he would use his right hand because “The Bible says that the right hand is good; the left hand is evil”.) It is stretching the analogy I know, but my point is that I believe most gays don’t choose their orientation nor do they seek to harm someone else for personal gain. It is just the way they are.

If I am going to err, I will err on the side of acceptance and love. I do not want to be like the pharisees who erred on the side of judgement and self-righteousness.

Tu Amigo, Pablo

I agree with you to err on the side of acceptance and love. Acceptance though, carries with it many meanings in our secular society.

So you have brought up the analogy about left-handedness. This is often used in this manner. I would ask you instead to look at the real issue you have brought up with this analogy, namely complementarity.

The complement to the left hand is the right hand. One might be dominant or stronger but they still complement. They are both hands. They are equal in dignity to each other, yet they are not the same.

Saying a same sex couple can raise a child the same way as an opposite sex couple denys complementarity. For example, a single woman can do a darn good job raising her kids all by herself. We refer to her as a single mom. If she were to set up house with say, another widowed friend (or even her own mother or grandmother) and they raise their children together, she is still a single mom. She may have a support structure in place that makes raising her children easier, but she is still a single mom.

Complementarity addresses the value of both sexes. No matter how masculine a single mother can act, she is still not a daddy. Only men can be daddies. Only women can be the mommies. Men can be nurturing. Women can be powerful. These are good things about the balance of women and men.

But by saying it is like left-handedness asks us to say that being born with two left hands is the same as being born with a left and a right. Complementarity exists in all of nature. Light and dark, right and left, up and down, yin and yang, masculine and feminine, and male and female.

Same sex couples can be very loving and caring. As individuals, many of my friends are. But when that love for each other lacks complementarity, it lacks balance. We are complementary even within ourselves. I have both feminine and masculine traits. But I am a female. By my very nature my complement is a male. Our children are best nurtured by balance.

 

[littleone]

When I worked as a case manager all of those things were considered reasons not to place a child.

Hi Kathleen I would like to ask you a question and this is not to put down. It is based partially of psychological/sociological analysis.
Q1: Since you were a case manager you would have to have some understanding of psych, sociology, possibly, cross culture and bi cultural studies. Would I be right in saying that?

Q2: If this is so, then because it is known in the psychological and sociological realms of social work that a large majority of (male especially) are male who at a young age have been sexually molest most of them on numerous occasions. It is these men, youth who generally speaking turn to male for a relationship usually sexually, is this right?

Q3: How many of these male victims by % of a 100 would you say have been counseled to forgive the perpetrator, How many then would be able to in all truth be a male role model for child up bringing in a relationship
Say male female relationship?
Male and male relationship?
Female and female relationship?
Thanks for your help
God bless
little one.

 

[littleone]

That’s simply not correct. Its not just the way they are.
People are not born gay. There is no gay gene.
People become homosexual as a result of their upbringing or product of their environment or largely by choice.

I’m afraid you are right it is the upbringing especially after sexual molestation which is rampage world wide. Sexual molestation in some families is seen as a right of the parents. The other part of this is as bad as the first that the parents have taught the children on many occasions that it is expected of the child/ren to allow parents and others to interfere with them sexually. Later when the child grows up they try to have a natural relationship or try to create a relationship with the same sex and it usually turns violent, on many occasions.
The setting is definitely NOT natural it is definitely satanic.

God bless
littleone

 

[fix]

Many good points have been made and most of them in a respectful tone.

Without meaning to give offense to anyone let me just list a few comments made about gay couples, homosexual relationships and gays in general since the beginning of this thread.
“intrinsically disordered”
“grave depravity”
“abusive”
“twisted”
“violence”
“immoral”
“egocentric”
“immoral”
“failures”

If I were going to come up with a program of discrimination against a group, I would use just those words. Labling a group of people with these comments only fosters dicscrimination. I don’t feel that it is right for any people to use their religion as a justification for the oppression of an another group of people.

As a member of a minority group I have seen discrimination firsthand. The Civil rights struggle is not yet over in our world. I believe that rights for gay couples are part of that struggle for civil rights.

The anology about homosexual behavior compared to a life of crime isn’t very accurate in my opinion. Crime involves a deliberate choice where one person seeks to harm another for personal gain.

In my opinon a better analogy would be left-handedness. (Mt grandfather had his left hand tied behind his back at school so he would use his right hand because “The Bible says that the right hand is good; the left hand is evil”.) It is stretching the analogy I know, but my point is that I believe most gays don’t choose their orientation nor do they seek to harm someone else for personal gain. It is just the way they are.

If I am going to err, I will err on the side of acceptance and love. I do not want to be like the pharisees who erred on the side of judgement and self-righteousness.

Tu Amigo, Pablo

Pablo,

In all respect I must say a big part of the problem is that we refuse to accept how serious the behavior is. That is the root of the problem. If it is seen as simply a variation of normal then characterizing the behavior as deviant would seem to be wrong.

If the behavior is a grave immoral act. Then you can see why such words are used.

It all comes down to how we understand right and wrong.

 

[DJgang]

Stepping in lightly, because I haven’t seen anyone mention this twist to the debate. It always comes up in my mind…

Gay Couple Adopts vs. Mother Aborts Child

 

[fix]

Gay Couple Adopts vs. Mother Aborts Child

False choice.

 

[thistle]

Stepping in lightly, because I haven’t seen anyone mention this twist to the debate. It always comes up in my mind…

Gay Couple Adopts vs. Mother Aborts Child

That’s not a choice as BOTH are EVIL.