Is it selfish, and therefore sinful, to remain single if one remains single for selfish reasons

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I find being single is a lot less work than being with someone in a relationship. I save more money and I have less drama and you know I don’t have anyone being mad at me for doing what I want when I want without a regard for what they think.

Is this sinful
 
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You listed perfectly valid reasons for being single. It’s called being realistic. I’m in the same boat and content. Anyone who would call me selfish can take a hike.
 
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Honestly if I mention this to my catholic friends I get looks from them like I’m the worst person because I’m not desperate like they are. I think marriage can be great but getting there also can be hell. I’d rather be single than be in failed relationships over and over again. I know that not all people are like that but after some time I think I ought to employ cost benefit analysis lol
 
I don’t think it’s sinful. If you were to string someone along and had no intention of marrying and weren’t honest, then yes. But if you are honest, and want to remain single, ain’t nobody’s business but your own.
 
“You gotta get Married! You gotta become a Religious!” My answer, “Um, no I don’t. I have a life and I’m living it according to God’s laws not your opinions.” 😇 I’m concerned with is getting my career set 👍
 
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It’s not sinful in and of itself. And even if you met someone you might like and decided not to pursue it because you’d prefer to be single then that is probably grand too.

I could only see it being sinful if you actually got into a serious relationship leading to marriage and then decided to end it because you’d rather be single and free.

In fairness, don’t be so surprised that people find your attitude odd. It’s not exactly the norm even outside Catholic circles. I would suggest that the only real drawback of this attitude is that it potentially could prevent you from experiencing the joy of marriage that you may very well prefer if you knew it.

I mean, I understand not wanting to be rejected or go through all the crap of finding a spouse. But fear is not a good basis on which to make important decisions. And really…when you find the right one…it becomes clear that it’s worth it.
 
Despair is never an attractive quality. It can repel potential marriage partners.

You can tell your desperate friends that.
 
I’m not afraid of rejection. I’m mostly against losing autonomy and independence
 
SacredHeartBassist, it sounds like you know what you want. Don’t feel you have to explain it to anyone unless you want to.
 
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My pet peeve, people that tell single men to become priests. Uh, no. The Priesthood is a calling. A first choice, not a fallback plan. Watch, someone will come along on this thread and suggest it. :roll_eyes:
 
Exactly! Just tell God you accept his Will for you in your life and keep moving along 🚂
 
That’s perfectly fine. But it does mean you are closing yourself off to a certain love. And to the possibility that there is a vocation for you that might require you to give up some freedom. Really marriage doesn’t curtail your personal freedom that much.

As John Paul II says:
“Love consists of a commitment which limits one’s freedom - it is a giving of the self, and to give oneself means just that: to limit one’s freedom on behalf of another. […] Limitation of one’s freedom might seem to be something negative and unpleasant, but love makes it a positive, joyful and creative thing. Freedom exists for the sake of love.”

― John Paul II, Love and Responsibility
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Oh, I don’t doubt it. :roll_eyes: Someone had suggested that you either have to Marry or become a Religious. That’s absurd… 😒🚬
 
I actually did ask a question of whether or not I was living in sin to a priest because I was neither married or in a religious order.

He said no, there is no sin in merely being single.
 
Irishmom2 said:
My pet peeve, people that tell single men to become priests. Uh, no. The Priesthood is a calling. A first choice, not a fallback plan. Watch, someone will come along on this thread and suggest it.
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If you ask me that’s a bit simplistic. The priesthood is a calling. But there is rarely a magical “call” to join the priesthood. Sometimes it’s suggestions and plantiing seeds over the years that stirs the heart. It also requires openness to the idea.

I think in a society filled with people who would preserve personal freedom at all costs will have few priests. All young catholic men should try to be open to the idea of priesthood if you ask me. It’s no harm to suggest that a single man could go on a vocations weekend or look into the religious life.
 
The priesthood is not an automatic fall back position if one were not able to get married.

That is the concept that people are objecting to.
 
Sarcelle said:
The priesthood is not an automatic fall back position if one were not able to get married.
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True but if you’re a single Catholic man then I don’t see the harm in suggesting that you might look into the possibility.

I would have no hesitation in making that suggestion. And it doesn’t mean that I think you should either be married or a priest.
 
Maybe if I had a good catholic spouse I wouldn’t mind giving up the freedoms but have you dated around recently lol
 
It’s not that long since I was dating. And I well remember the frustration of going on dates only to discover that the girl was nominally catholic but believed in gay marriage or “abortion in certain circumstances” etc.
 
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