My mom (whom I live with) is a very devout Catholic and good for her. My question comes in regards to her decorum. Other than some family pictures, every single picture or piece of art in the house is religious. Multiple statues, crucifixes, icons, pictures, etch in every room. Catholic books and magazines in the bathrooms and statues and shrines in the yard. Is it wrong for me to think it’s too much? I was having a buddy over who had never been to the house before and in the back of my mind, I’m thinking it’s too much. He knew I was Catholic and I’m not afraid to show it, but this kind of pushes the line. I mean seriously, there’s more religious artwork here than there is in multiple churches in our archdiocese combined. Is it wrong of me to be a little embarrassed because of this?
Is it wrong to not want to look like a religious fanatic?
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Virga
Guest
Wow sounds like my house. My dad has filled all the rooms --except for some family members’ bedrooms, with religious art and decorations.
When Catholic guests visited, I was worried people would think we were fanatics. I imagined the decor would confirm some of the non-Catholic guests’ assumptions that religious folk are weird and superstitious.
Eventually, I got used to it and appreciated the art myself. Most importantly, I recognized that this was something my dad enjoyed. It brought him happiness to decorate this way. And he’s far from superstitious with his faith. I would still change the decor if it were up to me, but I try to understand how much it means to my dad, especially now that he’s older and has fewer hobbies he can enjoy.
In the end, whether or not the decor is too much isn’t that big of a deal. Does it* really* harm anyone? Probably not. At the same time, I don’t think there’s anything “wrong” with feeling conscious about it. Feelings are feelings. Just do your best to live charitably and faithfully.
When Catholic guests visited, I was worried people would think we were fanatics. I imagined the decor would confirm some of the non-Catholic guests’ assumptions that religious folk are weird and superstitious.
Eventually, I got used to it and appreciated the art myself. Most importantly, I recognized that this was something my dad enjoyed. It brought him happiness to decorate this way. And he’s far from superstitious with his faith. I would still change the decor if it were up to me, but I try to understand how much it means to my dad, especially now that he’s older and has fewer hobbies he can enjoy.
In the end, whether or not the decor is too much isn’t that big of a deal. Does it* really* harm anyone? Probably not. At the same time, I don’t think there’s anything “wrong” with feeling conscious about it. Feelings are feelings. Just do your best to live charitably and faithfully.
M
Memaw
Guest
I agree, I have religious art all over my home too and I love it. I collect small vases of Our Lady and Baby Jesus, My sons made little shelves over all my windows for me to set them on, I have never heard any of my kids complain about all my art and books. In fact they have even asked me for some of them for their homes. Even my Daughters-in-law have asked me for some. I have told my kids for several years that if I have something they want, just tell me and it’s theirs. And they have. Even now my Grandkids are asking. I have one daughter-in-law that has a devotion to The Infant of Prague and she now has my beautiful statue and a beautiful Nativity set. I love being able to share with family and friends. Also they have been a great conversation for many of my non-Catholic friends over the years. Sad to say many Catholic homes today have little or NO religious art in them, but are decorated lavishly with secular stuff. They feel soo empty to me. God Bless. Memaw
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AnotherPenitent
Guest
I’ve never had this problem so I probably don’t know what it’s like, but your house sounds really cool to me! I think the trappings of our faith can be good conversation starters if guests are interested (and if they’re not, it’s just as easy to ignore them–I think it says a lot about us that we can be devout without trying to force our beliefs on other people).
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pensmama87
Guest
I’d say it’s only not good if the art is bad (the fact that it’s of something good doesn’t mean it can’t be kitschy or of poor quality.)
P
puzzledtoo
Guest
The thing that comes to mind when I go somewhere and see all kinds of stuff that people collect whether religious or not(my son collects anything and everything) is “look at all the dust collectors.” Secondly that these folks may be bordering on being hoarders. For me less in more. Blessings to all.
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maryjk
Guest
Gosh, I have to agree. I used to have to dust my parent’s collections. What a pain.
I am also surprised that so many people don’t have anything up in their house other than Catholic items. I have a lot of Catholic friends. And not one would be able to say this.
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InNomineDomini
Guest
Your mother’s devotion to her faith is a part of your life, and yes, to be embarrassed about it can be something that needs to be worked on. It may not necessarily be sinful, but it may also be rooted in compromise with worldliness, in pride, in vanity, in looking down on one’s parents, in a lukewarm or inconstant faith, and in many other things that are hardly virtues.
I would describe your reaction (as well as mine, since I would react in the same way) as being an imperfection. I would also try to mortify it precisely by embracing it.
In the end, our “buddies” are infinitely less important than God.
I would describe your reaction (as well as mine, since I would react in the same way) as being an imperfection. I would also try to mortify it precisely by embracing it.
In the end, our “buddies” are infinitely less important than God.
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pianistclare
Guest
Well, try not be embarrassed about your faith. People tend to respect those who have convictions and pious beliefs. You’re not asking people to convert, you’re not asking people to kneel in front of images.
People have various tastes in décor.
What floats their boat might be something you’d rather not do.
It’s fine.
My daughter’s little friend many years ago said “wow, you can’t walk anywhere in their house without some saint looking you in the face! There’s no way you’d do anything naughty in there!”
And I also agree with those say we should take care to see that what we do have is of fine quality. Although one of my prized pieces is a “rosary” that a child
from the Catholic school made for me. It has maybe 274 beads. But they were made with love for Our Lady and by extension for me. Sometimes children’s art is the most moving.
God bless you.
People have various tastes in décor.
What floats their boat might be something you’d rather not do.
It’s fine.
My daughter’s little friend many years ago said “wow, you can’t walk anywhere in their house without some saint looking you in the face! There’s no way you’d do anything naughty in there!”
And I also agree with those say we should take care to see that what we do have is of fine quality. Although one of my prized pieces is a “rosary” that a child
from the Catholic school made for me. It has maybe 274 beads.
But they were made with love for Our Lady and by extension for me. Sometimes children’s art is the most moving.God bless you.
C
Casilda
Guest
Our homes are our safe havens. It is comforting to see a cross, here and there or a statue of Mary. It sometimes prompts a quick prayer, a reassurance that we are His. The world outside our homes can be ugly and trying. It is a relief to come home and see an icon of Jesus or of one’s patron saint. The same for a blind person, who fills his home with incense, statues to touch or heavenly music.
My mother-in-law can be caustic at times, but her home is likewise filled with scripture passages on plaques, pictures of Jesus and angels. I focus on them when I am there.
I would be concerned about your feelings of embarrassment, I hope they are not like Peter’s when he denied knowing Christ, thrice, before the rooster crowed.
My mother-in-law can be caustic at times, but her home is likewise filled with scripture passages on plaques, pictures of Jesus and angels. I focus on them when I am there.
I would be concerned about your feelings of embarrassment, I hope they are not like Peter’s when he denied knowing Christ, thrice, before the rooster crowed.
No, it’s nothing like that. I’m not embarrassed about the faith at all. I’m embarrassed about the possible perception as being viewed as a “fanatic”. I’m not joking at all when I say you can add up the number of Catholic art pieces in our family room and living room and that number would probably exceed the number of 2 or 3 churches in our area combined.
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InNomineDomini
Guest
That’s a good point, too.
It may be a good idea to try to sympathize with your mother a bit more. The way her devotional art raises her mind to heaven, and brings her comfort, is much more important than what your friend might think of her.
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Mystical_Seeker
Guest
To the subject question, no it is not wrong.
If you live in your mother’s house and that makes her happy, that’s fine. There is no shame from my view, in having a mother who likes Catholic decorations. And if someone asks, you just say, “she likes these decorations.” You don’t need to make excuses for her, any more than you have to make an excuse for her being your mother in the first place.
That doesn’t mean you have to go around wearing a “Hi, I’m a Catholic” badge whenever you go out. It could lead to opportunities to fellowship with some, or it can lead to opportunities to look like you are clinging to a title and turn others off. In a mixed crowd, sometimes I like to find out more about the others before telling them I am Catholic because they may be more open to sharing and I want to learn to listen more and talk less. It’s surprising how many times a “Catholic hater” will engage in meaningful conversation about Jesus if they don’t know I’m Catholic, and then if I reveal I’m Catholic, they have something more to go on than just a hatred for a label, but for an experience in which a “Catholic” talked to them about “Jesus” – which for some is a revelation that it can even happen!
Paul talked about going among people who believe differently than we do. He talks of a strategy essentially “staying under the radar” to win their trust.
1 Cor 9
19 Although I am free in regard to all, I have made myself a slave to all so as to win over as many as possible. 20 To the Jews I became like a Jew to win over Jews; to those under the law I became like one under the law—though I myself am not under the law—to win over those under the law. 21 To those outside the law I became like one outside the law—though I am not outside God’s law but within the law of Christ—to win over those outside the law. 22 To the weak I became weak, to win over the weak. I have become all things to all, to save at least some. 23 All this I do for the sake of the gospel, so that I too may have a share in it.
If you live in your mother’s house and that makes her happy, that’s fine. There is no shame from my view, in having a mother who likes Catholic decorations. And if someone asks, you just say, “she likes these decorations.” You don’t need to make excuses for her, any more than you have to make an excuse for her being your mother in the first place.
That doesn’t mean you have to go around wearing a “Hi, I’m a Catholic” badge whenever you go out. It could lead to opportunities to fellowship with some, or it can lead to opportunities to look like you are clinging to a title and turn others off. In a mixed crowd, sometimes I like to find out more about the others before telling them I am Catholic because they may be more open to sharing and I want to learn to listen more and talk less. It’s surprising how many times a “Catholic hater” will engage in meaningful conversation about Jesus if they don’t know I’m Catholic, and then if I reveal I’m Catholic, they have something more to go on than just a hatred for a label, but for an experience in which a “Catholic” talked to them about “Jesus” – which for some is a revelation that it can even happen!
Paul talked about going among people who believe differently than we do. He talks of a strategy essentially “staying under the radar” to win their trust.
1 Cor 9
19 Although I am free in regard to all, I have made myself a slave to all so as to win over as many as possible. 20 To the Jews I became like a Jew to win over Jews; to those under the law I became like one under the law—though I myself am not under the law—to win over those under the law. 21 To those outside the law I became like one outside the law—though I am not outside God’s law but within the law of Christ—to win over those outside the law. 22 To the weak I became weak, to win over the weak. I have become all things to all, to save at least some. 23 All this I do for the sake of the gospel, so that I too may have a share in it.
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Auntie_A
Guest
Back to your original thread question: no, it is not wrong to not want to look like a religious fanatic? We want to attract not deter others to our faith; not give the impression that we are dependent on religious objects or have pathological disorders, but it all depends…some people like little statues of birds or cats in their home; some like salt and pepper server collections. When is it too much, even for religious objects? Perhaps when it deters us and others from living a strong spiritual life? Rather than having an obsession with material objects, a strong prayer life should be the goal.
But, as I read your story, I couldn’t help but think of eras and parts of the world where statues would be banned; perhaps we can afford some “fanatic” gestures and expressions, especially by those who live an active life in grace and truth?
But, as I read your story, I couldn’t help but think of eras and parts of the world where statues would be banned; perhaps we can afford some “fanatic” gestures and expressions, especially by those who live an active life in grace and truth?
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Memaw
Guest
That’s cute, and it reminds me of a friend many years ago whose daughter made the “Sign of the Cross,” when passing my house, and she asked, “Why did you do that?” and her daughter said , "Because of all the Crucifixes she has in her house. (I have one in every room.) God Bless, MemawWell, try not be embarrassed about your faith. People tend to respect those who have convictions and pious beliefs. You’re not asking people to convert, you’re not asking people to kneel in front of images.
People have various tastes in décor.
What floats their boat might be something you’d rather not do.
It’s fine.
My daughter’s little friend many years ago said “wow, you can’t walk anywhere in their house without some saint looking you in the face! There’s no way you’d do anything naughty in there!”
And I also agree with those say we should take care to see that what we do have is of fine quality. Although one of my prized pieces is a “rosary” that a child
from the Catholic school made for me. It has maybe 274 beads.
God bless you.
N
njlisa
Guest
I have lots of religious art in my house – icons of Jesus, the Blessed Mother, and various saints. I also have a crucifix on display in my living room. These icons remind me that I am a Christian and they give me great comfort. I think it’s a matter of personal choice.
G
graciew
Guest
2 or 3 churches combined! That was funny!
Talk about it with your mom. Maybe she has not realized and a few less statues may not change neither your love nor hers for Jesus.
Sounds like you are really talking about a lot,a lot . Well,yes,sometimes we,moms,can overdo it with those things we love. My mom for instance,had so many flower pots in the balcony that we always wondered how it did not collapse
. And I had a patina and stencil “attacks” in which I even decorated the washing machine!So,I would say,talk it over with your mom. If she insists it is ok,you know, you can simply tell your buddies " moms are moms…" And they will get it
. Lovingly!Take care! Many blessings!
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FunkyKikuchiyo
Guest
I don’t see anything wrong with having purely aesthetic concerns. There have been times I’ve wanted a nice statue or picture and when I shop around I don’t like the quality of anything I’m finding. There are a lot of ugly little tchotchkes out there. Plus, some people just have a cleaner aesthetic and hate clutter. If you really have that many things in your house, then it isn’t a matter of the subject matter. They could be little porcelain animals, beanie babies, Star Wars figures, whatever and it could be overwhelming.
As far as seeming like a fanatic… well, I think the problem here is how we think of “fanatics”. We see someone that is a little TOO into religion and well, they must not be playing with a full deck. I think someone who can truly be fanatical about their faith and invite others into their lives to demonstrate that they AREN’T nuts helps shape a more accurate portrait of the faithful. Many of the saints were fanatics, after all.
I repair guitars by trade, and had several clients over to the house before it even dawned on me that I have an old Sacred Heart statue towering over my work bench! It is big, probably 18"-24" tall. Lots of my clients saw it presumably, but I really didn’t mind once I got used to the idea. No one has commented on it yet, interestingly.
I think American Catholics have given too much thought to trying to “blend in” over the past 20-30 years. Let people think we’re weird if they want!
So, I don’t think it is wrong of you. But, it is a missed opportunity for evangelization, don’t you think?
As far as seeming like a fanatic… well, I think the problem here is how we think of “fanatics”. We see someone that is a little TOO into religion and well, they must not be playing with a full deck. I think someone who can truly be fanatical about their faith and invite others into their lives to demonstrate that they AREN’T nuts helps shape a more accurate portrait of the faithful. Many of the saints were fanatics, after all.
I repair guitars by trade, and had several clients over to the house before it even dawned on me that I have an old Sacred Heart statue towering over my work bench! It is big, probably 18"-24" tall. Lots of my clients saw it presumably, but I really didn’t mind once I got used to the idea. No one has commented on it yet, interestingly.
I think American Catholics have given too much thought to trying to “blend in” over the past 20-30 years. Let people think we’re weird if they want!
So, I don’t think it is wrong of you. But, it is a missed opportunity for evangelization, don’t you think?
S
Sunbreak
Guest
People have the right to decorate their homes however they want. However, I can understand the original poster’s concern. I was tentatively asked to housesit for someone who had so much religious stuff in their house that it looked like a religious goods store. I have to admit that I am very happy that housesitting job fell throught - there was really so much religious stuff that it was creepy.
K
KCT
Guest
Her castle, her rules. (or in this case, her decorations)
Is there some reason you and your friends can’t just ignore it?
Is there some reason you and your friends can’t just ignore it?
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