Is this breastfeeding at home acceptable?

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humilityforme

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Hi everybody,

Longtime viewer (about 4 years), first time poster. I post because I am too embarrassed to talked with anyone else about it.

I became friends with this nice woman at my church. After talking a lot, she invited me to her house. She has 6 kids, 3 of them breastfeeding. When we walked into her house, she took her blouse off :eek: . I was startled, and speechless. She probably figured out from my face that I was shocked. She said, “Oh, I don’t keep anything covering my breasts at home because I breastfeed almost 24/7.”. I said, "Okay!?!😊 ". We sat down, Me on a chair, her on the sofa. We started talking (She was doing the talking, I was still speechless). Then before I knew it, she attached her 8 moth old baby! I started to relax (only a little bit), and then her 2 year old boy jumped on the sofa and attached him self. What better topic should I start than breastfeeding! We started talking about parenting, church and so on. After half an hour, I was almost used to it, then her 4 year old boy wanted to nurse. She said “you will have to wait” until the 3 ear old was done. I was startled that a 4 year old was still nursing! I brought it up, She said “I will let my kids nurse until they choose to stop”. I told her about my breastfeeding experience (till 18 months), but she started citing all of these health organizations that say to breastfeed as long as possible. Another problem I had was most of her young kids did not have any clothes on! I have never seen anything like this, I wished she would have warned Me. Once her kids were done breastfeeding she started showing me around her house, still topless. I was uncomfortable, so I made up an excuse to leave. Who is in the wrong here ? Is it Me or her? and is this “nudity in the home” as she calls it, moral as a Catholic?

Thank You and God bless.
 
I am no expert and I won’t claim to be right on this…

…But that’s just weird
 
I don’t think the woman’s behavior is immoral.

I just think it’s very odd, particularly for when a guest is in the home. (I don’t think breastfeeding when there is a guest in the home is odd. But I think walking around with no top on is strange.)
 
I don’t think that her semi-clad behaviour was respectful to you nor very in touch with what is appropriate (e.g. she has no way of knowing whether it could cause any observer difficulties.)

It isn’t something I’d encourage by accepting it a normal behaviour. You came to accept her reality out of your own charity, but I doubt very much that Mother Mary would behave thus even though Jewish women of the time did have a more extended breast-feeding than is normal for us.

Am I mean?..I’d feel uncertain if she’s quite balanced…
I think I’d be a bit freaked and would probably be courteous and kind at Church but I think I mightn’t go visit again. I don’t know if I’d say she made me uncomfortable, I’d probably wonder if I should gently and tactfully say something to alert her to more acceptable perceptions of behaviour as a Catholic…as her children are also encouraged to be naked…but I’d certainly pray for her and her children.
 
Okay, this comes from a woman who nurses until age 3, and will do it in front of anyone in my home, and whose children start pulling off their clothes as soon as they get home and spend most of their time hanging around in their underwear…

That is a bit much. Not immoral or anything, but obviously her family is comfortable with a lot more nudity than most people. But I think it was really inappropriate for her to do that while she had a guest. I mean, walking around topless, for no good reason? The kids were done nursing, she could have put the shirt back on.

🤷 Some people are wierd. At least she keeps her wierd in the house…

Next time she wants to visit, invite her to your house. If she takes her top off there, well, then, she’s hopelessly odd or an exhibitionist.
 
actually, you could all that immodest as well…

That’s not good
 
Belgarion said:
actually, you could all that immodest as well…

That’s not good
Click to expand...
That may very well be… but it’s in my house and so no one’s business. We don’t walk around *in flagrante *with guests in the house. Our family does have that boundary. How much modesty does one need in one’s own home? Families live together, they see each other… it’s normal.

My husband and I have a fairly relaxed attitude toward the human body. “It’s just a body, everybody has one!” is something that is heard often around here. Some of the art we enjoy would probably be considered indecent or obscene by many on this board. And not because it’s sexual, because it’s not, but because it depicts nudes or partial nudity. They are not the same thing.

We do believe that there are appropriate ways to dress for certain venues, and we encourage and even enforce that, especially for school and church. But I also am not about to start telling people that short skirts, spaghetti straps, or tight jeans are always indecent. And if they wanna lounge in jammies or undies at home, that is really their business, as long as they don’t make me look at it!
 
Suggest she turn the heating down that will encourage more clothes 😃
But I agree that’s it’s not polite to do that when your guest is obviously uncomfortable with it. Nude kids are OK by me, but when they start school she may want to reconsider as her kids will almost inevitably get picked on for being different (kids need only the smallest excuse to pick on other kids)
 
I don’t think her behaviour was immoral - but what an awkward situation for you :eek: . I imagened it and had to laugh, but I wouldn’t have liked to be in your shoes.

Reminds of Monty Phyton movies 😃 😃 😃 . Really odd.
 
I agree with all the posters who said that this is just plain weird.

I have no problem with the breastfeeding.
I have no problem with breastfeeding in public.
I have no problem with parents who choose to breastfeed older children.
I have no problem with some degree of nudity in the home.
I don’t even have a problem with the kids running around nude, since some kids will take their clothes off no matter how many times you put them on. They’re kids. They’re innocent.

But to walk around topless in front of someone who is not much more than a stranger is (a) weird, and (b) rude, because it shows absolute disregard to the feeling of the guest. I mean, the host woman *must * know that how she runs her home is a tad *different * than how others run their homes.

I’m usually nude or near nude in my home, but I have curtains on the windows and live only with a cat (which is why I usually don’t wear clothes - so my clothes aren’t constantly coated with cat hair… long-haired cat cat hair). BUT, when my doorbell rings, I slip on a housedress so that I’m totally, modestly covered BEFORE I open the door! Isn’t that the normal thing to do (unless one lives in a nudist colony)?
 
**I have no problem with what people do in the privacy of their own homes regarding nudity. But all of that flies out the window when you have a guest over! Come on, topless???

Extended breastfeeding…great, all for it.

No shirt so that all 3 kids have easy access, no problem.

Whipping off your shirt and letting it all hang out to a completely unsuspecting first time guest… NO WAY!**
 
I totally agree with what the other posters here have said. When you have a guest in your house, you think about their comfort, that is part of being a good hostess. At the very least she should have warned you that there is a distinct lack of clothing going on in there. I am sorry you were uncomfortable.
 
humilityforme said:
Hi everybody,

Longtime viewer (about 4 years), first time poster. I post because I am too embarrassed to talked with anyone else about it.

I became friends with this nice woman at my church. After talking a lot, she invited me to her house. She has 6 kids, 3 of them breastfeeding. When we walked into her house, she took her blouse off :eek: . I was startled, and speechless. She probably figured out from my face that I was shocked. She said, “Oh, I don’t keep anything covering my breasts at home because I breastfeed almost 24/7.”. I said, "Okay!?!😊 ". We sat down, Me on a chair, her on the sofa. We started talking (She was doing the talking, I was still speechless). Then before I knew it, she attached her 8 moth old baby! I started to relax (only a little bit), and then her 2 year old boy jumped on the sofa and attached him self. What better topic should I start than breastfeeding! We started talking about parenting, church and so on. After half an hour, I was almost used to it, then her 4 year old boy wanted to nurse. She said “you will have to wait” until the 3 ear old was done. I was startled that a 4 year old was still nursing! I brought it up, She said “I will let my kids nurse until they choose to stop”. I told her about my breastfeeding experience (till 18 months), but she started citing all of these health organizations that say to breastfeed as long as possible. Another problem I had was most of her young kids did not have any clothes on! I have never seen anything like this, I wished she would have warned Me. Once her kids were done breastfeeding she started showing me around her house, still topless. I was uncomfortable, so I made up an excuse to leave. Who is in the wrong here ? Is it Me or her? and is this “nudity in the home” as she calls it, moral as a Catholic?

Thank You and God bless.
Click to expand...
This is the funniest thing I have seen in such a long time!! :rotfl:
Of course it was weird and unacceptable.
 
Hmmm, I think it’s pretty odd. I would definitely feel uncomfortable. I don’t mind nursing in public, but this is just …odd. And she was not very charitable towards you, obviously not everyone is comfortable towards a semi-stranger’s nudity…that’s why we wear clothes.

Also her comment about nursing 24/7. My son constantly nursed as infant, what does it take to lift your blouse 2 seconds.
 
Originally Posted by humilityforme
I told her about my breastfeeding experience (till 18 months),
Click to expand...
I missed that!!! For some reason that makes me feel better 😛
 
This reminds me of a time I went with a lady to her home to pick something up. As I followed her into her house, she walked straight to her washroom, pulled down her pants and began to pee, saying “wow, I have to go so bad!” and then proceeded to keep up the conversation with me through the open door! As I was following close behind her, I didn’t miss a thing, just backpeddaled as fast as I could when I saw she was on the toilet! :eek:

I think some people just aren’t very shy! 😊 🤷
 
Uhhhh, why did the thread title change? I thought this was more about nudity than breastfeeding… what gives?
 
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