Is your spouse your BEST friend?

[GoldenArrow]

I’m pretty sure nothing sexual is going on between my husband and his best friend. Despite that, I’m growing very jealous of the mental intimacy he has with her. She has him come over to her house ALL THE TIME to do man chores. She asked him to install some flooring for her in a difficult part of her house and he literally jumped at the chore and even had one of his employees help out. I asked if she was paying them for their labor and my husband did it for free and “maybe” she’d pay his employee “when she gets paid.” Contrast this to when I asked my husband to install a window in a bedroom a house I’m trying to sell (the one I had prior to the marriage). I moved into his house. Selling mine. I had to nag him for 6 months to install a window and he spent less time installing the freaking thing than we did fighting over whether or not a bedroom needs a window! I even told him that I’d hire a contractor to do it if he wasn’t going to. Then he complained he wasn’t getting paid for all the work done on my house and I told him that he’d be compensated when it sells!!!

He jumps at the chance to help his best friend though and he does it for free.

After I sell that accursed house and get out of debt, I’m gonna pressure him to move out of our current town so that I can get him away from her for a time. We can rent our his house. There’s a 2-4 year job on a pipeline that’s coming up in like 6 months, giving us the opportunity to live near my parents on a temp basis.

So, in keeping with the subject of the thread, my best friend husband has another best friend, so much so, that I feel like I might be the “other woman.”

One of my faults is that I can get very jealous. Do I have cause or am I overreacting?

This is an example of what can happen when your husband IS NOT your best friend.

 

[porthos11]

I’m pretty sure nothing sexual is going on between my husband and his best friend. Despite that, I’m growing very jealous of the mental intimacy he has with her. She has him come over to her house ALL THE TIME to do man chores. She asked him to install some flooring for her in a difficult part of her house and he literally jumped at the chore and even had one of his employees help out. I asked if she was paying them for their labor and my husband did it for free and “maybe” she’d pay his employee “when she gets paid.” Contrast this to when I asked my husband to install a window in a bedroom a house I’m trying to sell (the one I had prior to the marriage). I moved into his house. Selling mine. I had to nag him for 6 months to install a window and he spent less time installing the freaking thing than we did fighting over whether or not a bedroom needs a window! I even told him that I’d hire a contractor to do it if he wasn’t going to. Then he complained he wasn’t getting paid for all the work done on my house and I told him that he’d be compensated when it sells!!!

He jumps at the chance to help his best friend though and he does it for free.

After I sell that accursed house and get out of debt, I’m gonna pressure him to move out of our current town so that I can get him away from her for a time. We can rent our his house. There’s a 2-4 year job on a pipeline that’s coming up in like 6 months, giving us the opportunity to live near my parents on a temp basis.

So, in keeping with the subject of the thread, my best friend husband has another best friend, so much so, that I feel like I might be the “other woman.”

One of my faults is that I can get very jealous. Do I have cause or am I overreacting?

This is an example of what can happen when your husband IS NOT your best friend.

Emotional affair alert…???

 

[kptrs]

I’m pretty sure nothing sexual is going on between my husband and his best friend. Despite that, I’m growing very jealous of the mental intimacy he has with her. She has him come over to her house ALL THE TIME to do man chores. She asked him to install some flooring for her in a difficult part of her house and he literally jumped at the chore and even had one of his employees help out. I asked if she was paying them for their labor and my husband did it for free and “maybe” she’d pay his employee “when she gets paid.” Contrast this to when I asked my husband to install a window in a bedroom a house I’m trying to sell (the one I had prior to the marriage). I moved into his house. Selling mine. I had to nag him for 6 months to install a window and he spent less time installing the freaking thing than we did fighting over whether or not a bedroom needs a window! I even told him that I’d hire a contractor to do it if he wasn’t going to. Then he complained he wasn’t getting paid for all the work done on my house and I told him that he’d be compensated when it sells!!!

He jumps at the chance to help his best friend though and he does it for free.

After I sell that accursed house and get out of debt, I’m gonna pressure him to move out of our current town so that I can get him away from her for a time. We can rent our his house. There’s a 2-4 year job on a pipeline that’s coming up in like 6 months, giving us the opportunity to live near my parents on a temp basis.

So, in keeping with the subject of the thread, my best friend husband has another best friend, so much so, that I feel like I might be the “other woman.”

One of my faults is that I can get very jealous. Do I have cause or am I overreacting?

This is an example of what can happen when your husband IS NOT your best friend.

No, you’re not being jealous, nor are you overreacting. How long have you been married?

 

[EasterJoy]

For my part, my husband is my best friend, but not the other way around. He considers one of my bridesmaids to be his best friend!

They talk all the time on the phone in my presence (on speaker) and I hear new things about my husband’s via this method, so at least that counts for something.

We haven’t even had the wedding photos developed yet.

I don’t want to approach the subject because I will lose.

So I live with it and make sure we keep our finances separate and make sure I don’t get pregnant in the case I need to file for divorce.

I’d suggest starting a new thread with this, rather than resurrecting an old one. This is an entirely different can of worms that the original thread suggests. You don’t want to discourage anyone who is disinclined to plow through the entire old thread to catch up to this part of the conversation.

 

[alphawoman]

[BIBLEDRB][/BIBLEDRB]The bestest! I’m blessed with wonderful parents, a treasure of a son, and a handful of kindred spirit friends, but DH is the cherry on my sundae. He is my favourite person on the planet, and he always will be.

As for opposites attracting…pshaw, try carbon copies! We independently hold very similar views on religion, economics, and politics, as well as more trivial things like music and literature. We’re such nerds that we get excited when there is a nuanced difference between our positions, because then we get to debate! Have I mentioned that my husband’s mind is the sexiest thing going to me? Gotta love that man! When we’re both 90, he’ll still be as attractive as when we first met on that basis, if not more so…what a happy thought.