Sex with contraception is NOT saying a spouse saying “I love YOU”, only saying that you love those parts, as you so eloquently put it, that the other spouse find to be convenient to them. That is objectification.
The spouse includes their fertility. It is part of them. To reject it is not love the full person, only the parts found to be useful.
You actually proved my point pretty well.
Saying “I love you”, by definition means all of the other person. Rejecting any part of them, their face OR their fertility is rude and inconsiderate.
Sure the woman might agree, in much the same way that the woman might despise her face too and desire the bag. That does not mean that rejection, of any type, is a part of a healthy relationship.
And yes, it is possible to love them, and not have a baby at that time. Sometimes love is best expressed by waiting and the use of self control.
Brendan, not everyone has the luxury of planning out pregnancy and using self control and waiting. Some of us have rare genetic diseases that we find would be a great disservice to future children, if we risk bringing them into the world with said condition. Some women, have bodies that can’t handle pregnancy for what ever reason. Some women are absolutely terrified of getting pregnant for the reasons I cited above as well as many other reasons. So no, rejecting fertility isn’t rude or inconsiderate, not everyone likes or wants their fertility. Some women even wish they were born sterile!
Fertility is NOT useful to a couple that doesn’t want kids for whatever reason. For these people it is a detriment and a nuisance and for some, their greatest fear.
You can love someone and not want to get pregnant. Everyone has their reasons, some more serious than others. If both parties don’t want a baby and have sex, while taking the appropriate steps to avoid pregnancy, they’re not objectifying their spouse, it’s called being smart. To reject fertility is not the end of the world. And like a said before, removing fertility only removes one aspect from sex.
Also, I “reject” my boyfriend’s attempt to kiss me when he has morning breath. I “reject” his attempt to hug me when he hasn’t showered after working outside. I refuse to have sex with him until after marriage. Man, he and I have such an unhealthy relationship, look at all the rejecting I do
Just like, when I get married, I plan to get sterilized so my body “rejects” the possibility of pregnancy. I have my reasons, which are serious reasons. Adoption is always an option. Biological children unfortunately cannot be one of those options.
That its aspects are not meant to be disaggregated as Aiyana proposes.
The Catholic Church can have its own interpretation of sex. Myself and many others certainly don’t agree with the Churches interpretation and we don’t have too. I know for certain that I won’t let the paralyzing fear I experienced when I was a practicing Catholic control my life and torment me anymore like it did unrelentingly for years. And no, I’m not just referring to the Catholic idea for sex, plenty of other issues I don’t agree with as well.
