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dochawk
Guest
As long as we’re at it . . . the Dominican and Franciscan were arguing about which order was the greatest. They finally left a note in the tabernacle:
They came back in the morning while preparing for Mass, and found a return order.
A mother goes to her pastor and explains that her son seems very interested in becoming a priest. She would like to know what this would require.
So the priest begins to explain: “If he wants to become a diocesan priest, he’ll have to study for eight years. If he wants to become a Franciscan, he’ll have to study for ten years. If he wants to become a Jesuit, he’ll have to study for fourteen years.”
The mother listens carefully, and as the priest concludes, her eyes brighten. “Sign him up for that last one, Father – he’s a little slow!”
So the priest begins to explain: “If he wants to become a diocesan priest, he’ll have to study for eight years. If he wants to become a Franciscan, he’ll have to study for ten years. If he wants to become a Jesuit, he’ll have to study for fourteen years.”
The mother listens carefully, and as the priest concludes, her eyes brighten. “Sign him up for that last one, Father – he’s a little slow!”
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Michael16
Guest
Oh my gosh!! 
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Michael16
Guest
Hahahahaha I love that one!!
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Bixby
Guest
I’m afraid I won’t have this quite right, but I’ll give it a go anyway:
A Jewish mother once took her son to a rabbi to find out what the boy’s future might be. After making her request, the rabbi stroked his beard, asked her to seat the child on her lap in front of his desk and wait a minute while he went off to fetch something. He then shuffled off to the corner of his office and returned with three items. Seating himself again he placed a copy of the Torah, a stack of hundred dollar bills and a full glass of whisky in front of the infant. Looking at the surprised mother he said,
“Now watch carefully. If the boy takes the Torah, he will become a rabbi. If he takes the money, he will be a lawyer. And if he takes the whisky, well,” he stroked his beard again. “If he takes the whisky he will be an academic.”
Fascinated in spite of herself, the woman joined the old man in watching the child. Without a moment’s hesitation the babe grabbed the Torah, shoveled the money into its lap and then took the glass of whisky and threw it back in a single swallow."
The rabbi’s eyes widened and he buried his face in his hands. The mother, worried, asked, “Is something wrong, Rabbi? What does it mean?”
“Oy vay!” the the old man moaned, “He’s going to be a Jesuit!”
Like I say, not quite right, but close enough.
A Jewish mother once took her son to a rabbi to find out what the boy’s future might be. After making her request, the rabbi stroked his beard, asked her to seat the child on her lap in front of his desk and wait a minute while he went off to fetch something. He then shuffled off to the corner of his office and returned with three items. Seating himself again he placed a copy of the Torah, a stack of hundred dollar bills and a full glass of whisky in front of the infant. Looking at the surprised mother he said,
“Now watch carefully. If the boy takes the Torah, he will become a rabbi. If he takes the money, he will be a lawyer. And if he takes the whisky, well,” he stroked his beard again. “If he takes the whisky he will be an academic.”
Fascinated in spite of herself, the woman joined the old man in watching the child. Without a moment’s hesitation the babe grabbed the Torah, shoveled the money into its lap and then took the glass of whisky and threw it back in a single swallow."
The rabbi’s eyes widened and he buried his face in his hands. The mother, worried, asked, “Is something wrong, Rabbi? What does it mean?”
“Oy vay!” the the old man moaned, “He’s going to be a Jesuit!”
Like I say, not quite right, but close enough.
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VanitasVanitatum
Guest
I don’t get this part. Could you explain?
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Michael16
Guest
Hahahahahaha Cajun!!
Tis_Bearself
Patron
A man wanted to buy an expensive Ferrari sports car, but didn’t have enough money, so he decided to pray a novena asking God to help him get enough money for a Ferrari.
He asked two priests he knew if they would please also join him in praying the novena so he could get enough money to buy a Ferrari.
The first priest, a Franciscan, said, "What’s a Ferrari? "
The second priest, a Jesuit, said, “What’s a novena?”
He asked two priests he knew if they would please also join him in praying the novena so he could get enough money to buy a Ferrari.
The first priest, a Franciscan, said, "What’s a Ferrari? "
The second priest, a Jesuit, said, “What’s a novena?”
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Michael16
Guest
I believe you, Cajun. Hahahahaha
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Michael16
Guest
Hahahahaha Yeah, I have to admit: To the authority figures of His day, Our Lord probably did teach weird things.
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Mi_Rose
Guest
Every time I see the title I think what else is new.
Jesuits meet people where they are and try to convince them to embrace Jesus. Sometimes that involves weird things…
Jesuits meet people where they are and try to convince them to embrace Jesus. Sometimes that involves weird things…
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Michael16
Guest
That’s an interesting point. I guess to reach folks outside the Church these days; you can’t hit them pre Vatican II style.
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commenter
Guest
I know some individual Jesuits who still do that, the part I bolded, but they now are exceptions, or “weird”, among the Jesuits.
For over a century in the West, dissent from orthodoxy, the Natural Law, dogma, has been safely mainstream. Prior to the 1960s, Jesuits were “weird” in the sense of offering alternatives to the secular culture. They dissented from the state universities, from the Mass media, offering ideas or POV you couldnt get elsewhere. They were counter cultural, but not anymore, with exceptions.
Today the Jesuit school and magazine are more an imitation, less an alternative, to the secular culture. They teach the popular, trending truths. They no longer dissent from anyone, except the Church.
The modern establishment Jesuit failure to dissent much from the culture gains them many admirers, but very few vocations. But there are exceptions to the Jesuit establishment.
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Bixby
Guest
Have to agree with you here. I’d guess the vast bulk of orthodox candidates that the Jesuits would have attracted in the past will today be approaching the FSSP, Institute of Christ the King or SSPX instead. It’s very sad.
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JanetF
Guest
In short, they are some of the best educators out there.
But I’m biased having studied undergrad at a Jesuit university and now workking at the same Jesuit University
But I’m biased having studied undergrad at a Jesuit university and now workking at the same Jesuit University
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MagdalenaRita
Guest
The Jesuits have done many good things in the far past. There are still some very good Jesuit priests, as others have mentioned Fr. Pacwa, but many have moved very far to the left and into the worldly arena. Most Jesuit run colleges have become very progressive and walk very close to the culture when it comes to Catholic theology which can make their education dangerous to one’s faith.
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commenter
Guest
There is some unfair criticism of the Jesuits: heresy, Communism, Masonry, conspiracy-weaving, plus the really paranoid stuff. I say “unfair” because it is rare, and not reflective of leadership, and a few extreme persons have been removed or chose to leave.
Unfortunately the fixation on, and rejection of unfair criticism distracts from much needed, fair criticism:
They charge Catholic school tuition and claim Catholic label for what is, in effect, public school education.
They teach only those truths, support only those justice causes, currently taught and supported by the media.
But accusing a thief of being a Murderer is not only uncharitable to the thief, but self defeating, because it takes attention away from the honesty issue (“see, I’m innocent”)
Unfortunately the fixation on, and rejection of unfair criticism distracts from much needed, fair criticism:
They charge Catholic school tuition and claim Catholic label for what is, in effect, public school education.
They teach only those truths, support only those justice causes, currently taught and supported by the media.
But accusing a thief of being a Murderer is not only uncharitable to the thief, but self defeating, because it takes attention away from the honesty issue (“see, I’m innocent”)
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