Kids or God First?

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Your parents need to recognize that these are YOUR children, not theirs. I’d suggest just saying to them, “Look, we ARE going to Mass, that’s not up for discussion. You need to quit telling me how to parent my own kids. End of.”
 
Michael16 said:
I bring up religion each and every time that my family’s belief that family comes before all else, backed by their understanding of Lutheran doctrine; conflicts with my duties as a practicing Catholic.
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You already probably stated your beliefs before and they probably already know what it is. Maybe try being kept silent when they do that… Maybe they’re trying to provoke you? Or maybe not . try shining your light to them by being a good Catholic without using words.

If they ask for your opinion about something morally speaking just reply kindly with a smile that " warning you’re going to give them a Catholic opinion if they really want to know."

Preach to them the Catholic Church through your life with your kindness.

They might end up asking you questions and then you can talk to them about the faith again with kindness.

If I said anything morally wrong Catholics please correct me.
 
It’s not that. They’re angry at me because I want to go to Confession and Mass instead of spending time with my brother, whom I haven’t seen in a while; and my kids at a hotel pool. Even though, I’ll still have a hour to do so. They insist that I’m being selfish for wanting to be right with God above family. They keep insisting that God isn’t going to punish me for missing Mass just once.
 
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So? You’re an adult. Not their choice. You can say to them, “Look, this IS my decision, you don’t get a say, the subject is dead.”

How often you do or don’t see your brother is none of their business. How you raise your children, as long as you’re not abusive, is none of their business.
 
His_helpmeet said:
So? You’re an adult. Not their choice. You can say to them, “Look, this IS my decision, you don’t get a say, the subject is dead.”

How often you do or don’t see your brother is none of their business. How you raise your children, as long as you’re not abusive, is none of their business.
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Yes. This is everything I wanted to say, you just said it much better.
 
Thank you. But, I’m stuck with these people.

I’m ashamed to say, but I caved. 😞😡 I told my mom I won’t go to Confession or Mass and spend time with my family instead.

I’m pissed at myself and my family and ashamed that I couldn’t be a martyr for the Faith and compromised with Protestantism.
 
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Why not instead just set appointments of spending time with your family? I mean you can always go just once a week during the Sunday mass can’t you?
 
I do; they’re okay with that. As long as it doesn’t conflict with family obligations.
 
Your spouse comes before your kids? As a father of a 3 year old child, that doesn’t feel right or natural to me. In fact, I’m pretty sure my wife would immediately divorce me and despise me with a burning hatred if I attempted to save her before him in a moment of danger…
 
Maybe I’m a flawed and imperfect husband (in fact I know I am)… but the reality is I love my son more than I love my wife. I’ve never felt a love that compares to that for my son… not even the bliss of the “honeymoon” stage.
 
twf said:
Your spouse comes before your kids? As a father of a 3 year old child, that doesn’t feel right or natural to me. In fact, I’m pretty sure my wife would immediately divorce me and despise me with a burning hatred if I attempted to save her before him in a moment of danger…
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If you would like to continue this discussion, please start a new thread so we don’t hijack this thread. I don’t think the debate of whether spouse or kids should come first is useful to the OP or relevant to his question. God bless.
 
To the OP- it might help if you explain to your relatives that part of your love for and duty to God INCLUDES loving your children and being the best parent possible.
 
I tried to explain that, in order to be at my best as a parent and example; I have to be right with God. They said I was being selfish and that God isn’t going to send me to hell for missing Mass once and whenever family is in town.
 
People who have grown children that don’t need their full-time protection anymore. Most married couples agree to put their kid’s needs before their own while their children are so young that they need constant care.
 
Michael16 said:
I’m devoted to God; my family is devoted to family. Period.
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Sounds like your family being devoted to family is working pretty well for you, considering you are living under their roof. I think it’s disrespectful for you to push their buttons on religious topics while they are providing the roof over your head. Perhaps you can not instigate arguments with them about religion. It seems that is the charitable thing to do. After all, if they were living under your roof consider how it would make you feel if they were constantly digging at you about your religious beliefs. Probably not great.
 
Aren’t your children in mourning? Are people grieving atm?

Should you even be asking such a question. They just lost their mother. You lost your wife.

Death is not a drama. It’s a time of mourning. Was it a sudden or expected death? Where your children expecting or waiting on losing their mother
 
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It was unexpected. But, I’m confused. If I miss Sunday Mass because my family expects me to put family before God, because my brother doesn’t visit that often; each and every time family visit from out of town, wouldn’t that render my Confession invalid?
 
Your father and mother are no doubt dealing with grandchildren in shock and mourning. Who is picking up the emotional pieces for these children?
 
Michael, who is picking up the pieces for these children who just lost their mother and are in shock, mourning and no doubt stunned?

Your 8yo boys are going to be mourning and grief filled for quite some time,

Would you all benefit from grief counselling to help your sons
 
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