I have a geneticist an endocrinologist and a urologist for my son who emphatically agree that it is not a hereditary disorder rather a miosis/ mitosis problem. 2002 data is rather old.In a 2002, Eskenazi, Wyrobek, Kidd, Lowe, More II, Weisiger, and Aylstock, research stated:“Inheritance of the extra X chromosome was paternal in 10 and maternal in 26 families. Fathers of paternal KS cases produced higher frequencies of XY sperm (P = 0.02) than fathers of maternal KS cases. After controlling for age, the major confounding variable, the difference between the two groups was no longer significant (P <= 0.2). Also there were no significant differences between the paternal origin groups for disomy X, Y, or 21. CONCLUSIONS: Men who fathered a child with a Klinefelter syndroms produced higher frequencies of XY sperm aneuploidy, which is explained in part, by both paternal age and parent of origin.”
Reference: Sperm aneuploidy in fathers of children with paternally and maternally inherited Klinefelter syndrome. Human Reproduction, Vol 17, No. 3, pp 576-583
An inability to have sex period is a deal-breaker for a Catholic marriage. A person who can’t have sex can’t enter into a valid marriage. (This ONLY applies if the condition is pre-existing before the marriage and it is permanent.) An inability to have children doesn’t necessarily invalidate a marriage, as long as the couple is willing to be at least open to the possibility of new life.I think NOT talking openly and honestly about sex and fertility before engagement and marriage is insane. Some people consider the inability to have sex and/or the inability to have children through natural means to be deal breakers. It’s best to know where you stand beforehand. Getting the pertinent facts is not intrusive when considering marriage and engagement.
I happen to have been born to a woman with a severe birth defect that science hasn’t figured out yet. They don’t know if it is genetic or environmental or some kind of fluke. It’s possible my siblings and I could produce a severely handicapped child. I was open about this when my husband and I were dating because it is a factor, like it or not. If he had said he couldn’t marry me under the circumstances I would have been very hurt, but I would have understood.
I am a woman with a high sex drive. While sex isn’t the end all-be all I wouldn’t be happy with a man who had a much lower sex drive than I do. It’d be a source of friction and resentment for me. It would slowly erode my self-esteem because I would always wonder if he was naturally like that or if it was some lack or failure on my part. I can imagine I’d feel less loved, too. As in, logic not withstanding, “If he loves me then why is this a problem? Shouldn’t his love for me override his natural low sex drive?” Not logical, but feelings often aren’t. I’d also probably drive both of us crazy trying to fix it. Which would likely make him feel resentment and as if all I cared about were sex. It wouldn’t be a good relationship for either of us.
When catholics talk about marriage there is an awful lot about giving and receiving of the whole person between spouses. Part of the whole person is sex and fertility. If there are problems in those areas it will eventually spill over into the rest of the relationship. So, I think these potential incompatibilities and issues should be openly discussed relatively early in a relationship so that flags can be identified and if there are deal breakers involved the couple can amicably split and find more suitable mates. Why waste each others time?
ETA: I have 3 healthy children, my sister has given birth to 4 healthy children and is raising 2 more besides, my older brother has a daughter with MS, but the docs say it’s probably not related to our mothers condition, and my younger brother has 3 healthy children. So, thank God, we’re ok so far. But we all did genetic counseling with each pregnancy and we were all warned it was possible that we could have a special needs child even with all the healthy kids we’ve created. Each and every time one of us is having a baby we go through months of worry and tests and extra doctor visits for monitoring before we know for sure if our baby will be ok. It’s hard on a relationship.
This post was a mistake since 47, XYY is not the same as Klinefelter which is 47, XXY.NIH states “Most males with 47,XYY syndrome have normal sexual development and are able to father children.”
“Most cases of 47,XYY syndrome are not inherited.”
“46,XY/47,XYY mosaicism is also not inherited.”
ghr.nlm.nih.gov/condition/47xyy-syndrome
Thank you. Of course. There is a parental factor however. Also older studies:I have a geneticist an endocrinologist and a urologist for my son who emphatically agree that it is not a hereditary disorder rather a miosis/ mitosis problem. 2002 data is rather old.
Here is the nih info. ghr.nlm.nih.gov/condition/klinefelter-syndrome
I know this because my son has klinefelters and I live with it everyday and see doctors who specialize in it often
If annulments are viewed as embarrassing, that is an attitude that needs to change.Maybe she just wants a valid, consummated marriage, to have a husband she can enjoy the normal joys of married life with and not to have the embarrassment and inconvenience of an annulment?
I thin there has been quite enough good advice regarding the Klinefelter part. But there is something that caught my attention heavily which to me is a massive red flag and is completely independent as to whether he has Klinefelter and is what ET wrote above. If she has a feeling that he is not attracted to her and he doesn’t behave as someone who has an attraction to his significant other and she is getting the feeling there is something off in the relationship, even if he doesn’t have KS …that is a red flag.She also doesn’t think he seems to have a physical attraction toward her in the same way that a man you are dating normally would. It sounds as though it is basically her intuition that something is a little bit “off,” .
It sounds like a matter of communication between the couple. Appearances can be deceiving. I remember when I first met my husband I thought he wasn’t attracted to me and just wanted to be friends. He’s naturally a bit shy and socially awkward, so he didn’t “make a move” until another gentleman, a friend of his, expressed some interest and spurred my now DH into action. And that’s not even close to the first time I mistook romantic interest for friendship and vice versa. I learned the best way to find out what someone thinks or feels is to ask!I thin there has been quite enough good advice regarding the Klinefelter part. But there is something that caught my attention heavily which to me is a massive red flag and is completely independent as to whether he has Klinefelter and is what ET wrote above. If she has a feeling that he is not attracted to her and he doesn’t behave as someone who has an attraction to his significant other and she is getting the feeling there is something off in the relationship, even if he doesn’t have KS …that is a red flag.
Sincerely my opinion is that the issue of KS is an excuse she is looking to justify something that she knows is wrong in the relationship. The fact that they ate engaged is more worry some. If I were you my advice to her would be to forget about KS, there seems to be a major issue in the relationship and to stop looking for excuses for his behavior. She needs to focus on his particular behavior that is giving her the feeling that something is wrong (example acting like he is not interested in her) and bring the specific behavior up to him. For example you act like if you are not interested in me, you ignore me etc (whatever the behavior is) I don’t like it and I don’t want to be married to someone who ignores me.
I think that is much more helpful than continuing to feed an excuse that we don’t even know if it actually is the case.
Exacrly, there are tons of possibilities here. Communication is very important in a marriage. She must be able in the event that she feels that there is something wrong in the relation to express it to him in a mindful way and talk about it. If she cannot communicate with him and instead she is going to start making excuses for his behavior and just let it get worse, that is going to be very problematic in a marriage. Clear communication is a must and is clear that is failing here. If she cannot communicate with him now the “off” feeling is going to get worse and during marriage everything will be worst. She either has to communicate clearly and in a respectful way to him and clarify why that off feeling or why certain behavior is affecting her or she should reconsider are marrying this man.It sounds like a matter of communication… I learned the best way to find out what someone thinks or feels is to ask!
It’s possible this man does have a medical condition. It’s possible he is gay and trying to find a wife in order to live out his life as normally as he can. It’s possible he is very attracted to his lady’s personality, but not attracted to her physically. It’s possible he isn’t acting as if he is very attracted to her because he is restraining himself in order to be chaste. Underneath it all he could be burning with passion. It’s also possible that they communicate differently and he believes he is making his regard clear when in reality she isn’t receiving the signals he is sending. But no one will ever know for sure unless he is asked!
I don’t see anything wrong with the woman he is involved with simply saying that she senses something “off” and would like to discuss it with him. As long as she is tactful and mindful of his feelings I can’t imagine a reasonable man taking offense.
Besides, marriage is an extremely intimate relationship. If you can’t openly and honestly discuss concerns with the person you’re considering marrying you probably should reconsider marriage to that person! I always thought it was some kind of canned marital cliche that communication is everything. Then I got married. After a few rough years due to misunderstandings and misinterpreted actions we learned that as much as we click we still had to work on open, honest, and clear communication.