Being single I find this thread instructive - I think we single folks (both single men and single women) should really watch out not to marry some control freak who will ruin our ability to work and serve others in our chosen professions/vocations/ministries. Whether you serve as a lawyer, as a life scientist, as a marriage counselor, or as a Knight of Columbus, in the end it’s more than just a means of earning a paycheck (and KofC members do not earn a paycheck for their service), because you are serving people, and secrecy when required, is simply a tool that helps you perform your profession/vocation/ministry in a safer, more effective, more adequate manner.
I’m not a lawyer but I’m in a somewhat similar situation to you. I’m an inventor and I have been working closely with patent attorneys for many years, on several patent applications. I have a duty not to share confidential information with outside people (not even with family members), and my patent attorney has a similar duty. So far, with my family, this has never been a problem. My family members know that I work on new experimental drugs that will help a lot of sick people with cancer and other diseases, and that’s enough to them. They are happy for me, and not privy to detailed information that’s confidential.
So, would I ever want to marry some psychologically unbalanced control freak who feels threatened by my “secrets” and wants to know exact chemical structures that have not been disclosed yet, exact animal models and experimental details with tumor inhibition data and so on - or else quit my job, since my contractual obligations forbid me from disclosing this info? Not a chance in hell. Thank you, I’m quite happy the way I am, working jobs that require me to keep confidential information, and I’m not going to ruin my life marrying some control freak who can’t deal with it.
To reverse the situation, I would have no problem marrying a woman who has a similar duty to keep confidential information in her line of work. If I marry, let’s say, another life scientist, it’s enough to me to know that she is working on “good drugs”, i.e. ethical drugs, rather than some “bad drugs” like the next abortive pill or whatever. I don’t need detailed information.
And now I understand that the KofC is a similar situation, only more secure morally than a typical secular job, because the full moral authority of the Catholic Church stands behind KofC’s practices, including the initiation ceremony which is kept secret and which the Catholic Church is OK with. So, why the heck would be an outsider privy to the exact details of a KofC initiation ceremony, after they have been told already that Catholic bishops and priests have been part of the same ceremony, and that the Catholic Church is fully aware and approving of the whole thing?
It’s simply not true nor necessary that they do. I have no problem with it because I know what type of thing they are keeping secret for their members alone and know that it is fully approved by the Holy Father, so it’s simply not an issue.