Lapsed Catholics Explain Why They Leave the Church

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Yes, there are such churches, but the churches that argue against that simplistic notion are pretty much all other non-Catholic churches. When was the last time you heard your pastor argue against OSAS? OSAS has been debunked by many Evangelicals as well as by mainline Protestantism, all using Scripture to prove their point. When I used to post on the Rapture Ready website, I found that almost all those Evangelicals rejected OSAS as insupportable by the Bible.
That’s ironic, because every non-Catholic preacher that I have ever hear live, on the radio, or on TV, have an “altar call” towards the end of their lecture in which the person is told to pray the “Sinner’s Prayer”, after which they are congratulated for having their name entered in the “Lamb’s Book of Life” from which it can never be erased. 🤷 Sounds like OSAS to me.
 
Yes, but many of the non-Catholic congregations have a “repent and you will be saved” (also called Once Saved, Always Saved) ministry. They don’t teach that salvation is an ongoing process that calls for continual reflection on one’s sinfulness, repentance of lapses, and an ongoing effort to live a pure life.
They also allow for remarriage after divorce.
 
That’s ironic, because every non-Catholic preacher that I have ever hear live, on the radio, or on TV, have an “altar call” towards the end of their lecture in which the person is told to pray the “Sinner’s Prayer”, after which they are congratulated for having their name entered in the “Lamb’s Book of Life” from which it can never be erased. 🤷 Sounds like OSAS to me.
And it is, and those radio preachers represent the OSAS point of view.
 
They also allow for remarriage after divorce.
We can’t deny the swathes of people who want out with the old and in with the new. It sure as heck beats the work it take to keep a marriage together forever. I mean, why try to keep the romance fresh with someone you’ve been with for 20 years? Really, just dump the old one when things get stale and take on a new, fresh, exciting person in your life…until that one gets old and stale. Lather, rinse, repeat.
 
We can’t deny the swathes of people who want out with the old and in with the new. It sure as heck beats the work it take to keep a marriage together forever. I mean, why try to keep the romance fresh with someone you’ve been with for 20 years? Really, just dump the old one when things get stale and take on a new, fresh, exciting person in your life…until that one gets old and stale. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Believe it or not, there are other, and indeed valid, reasons for wanting to get out of a marriage. Why work to keep the marriage together if the man is beating the wife or cheating on her or any number of other decent reasons to say “quits”?

I know any number of Catholics who found that keeping romance fresh doesn’t work all the time. Sometimes people have just made a terrible mistake and need to have the marriage dissolved.
 
Believe it or not, there are other, and indeed valid, reasons for wanting to get out of a marriage. Why work to keep the marriage together if the man is beating the wife or cheating on her or any number of other decent reasons to say “quits”?

I know any number of Catholics who found that keeping romance fresh doesn’t work all the time. Sometimes people have just made a terrible mistake and need to have the marriage dissolved.
Kinda runs contrary to the notion of “What God has joined, let no man put asunder.”
 
Kinda runs contrary to the notion of “What God has joined, let no man put asunder.”
Maybe so, but even the Catholic Church allows for divorce (but not remarriage) and for annulment (with remarriage). Contrary to the words of Scripture? Maybe, but not contrary to the reality of marriage and its difficulties.
 
Scripture, that may be true and for argument sake I’m gonna say it is. However, I can think of one couple right off the top of my head who definately do not belong together.

When my wife hints around how so and so wants to get togther, I get that sinking feeling in my gut immediatly. After awhile you start paying attention to those feelings. 😉
 
Scripture, that may be true and for argument sake I’m gonna say it is. However, I can think of one couple right off the top of my head who definately do not belong together.
I beieve that every one of us could think of a number of people like that.
 
I thought we were talking about the Catholic Church in union with Rome?
Not exclusively. This thread has touched on OSAS, a minority Evangelical position, and throwing in a few words about schismatic churches is in order IMO.
 
Not exclusively. This thread has touched on OSAS, a minority Evangelical position, and throwing in a few words about schismatic churches is in order IMO.
In reference to divorce and remarriage, there are people who leave the Catholic Church because of this reason. Most Protestant Churches allow for remarriage after divorce.

As far as I know, the churches you mentioned are not in union with Rome.
 
We can’t deny the swathes of people who want out with the old and in with the new. It sure as heck beats the work it take to keep a marriage together forever. I mean, why try to keep the romance fresh with someone you’ve been with for 20 years? Really, just dump the old one when things get stale and take on a new, fresh, exciting person in your life…until that one gets old and stale. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Well, I’m divorced. Your statement does not reflect on why I left my marriage and got a civil divorce. Actually, according to the Church, I am still married.

I just refuse the secular “you need to get married before you get too old” line.

I’m perfectly happy living without a mate. 🙂
 
In reference to divorce and remarriage, there are people who leave the Catholic Church because of this reason. Most Protestant Churches allow for remarriage after divorce.

As far as I know, the churches you mentioned are not in union with Rome.
Yes, the two I mentioned are schismatic.
 
Well, I’m divorced. Your statement does not reflect on why I left my marriage and got a civil divorce. Actually, according to the Church, I am still married.

I just refuse the secular “you need to get married before you get too old” line.

I’m perfectly happy living without a mate. 🙂
But you’re Catholic though.
 
Well, I’m divorced. Your statement does not reflect on why I left my marriage and got a civil divorce. Actually, according to the Church, I am still married.

I just refuse the secular “you need to get married before you get too old” line.

I’m perfectly happy living without a mate. 🙂
I and my wife have a “Catholic divorce.” She left me in 1989 and moved back to New York City. We are almost entirely out of each other’s lives without having gotten a formal divorce. I, too, didn’t see a reason to remarry. 🙂
 
People are called to repentance in all the Christian churches, not just ours. That couldn’t be the only reason for leaving. Some friends of mine went from Catholicism to agnosticism for intellectual reasons. Not everyone leaves because he or she is too great a sinner or because of birth control.
I can totally relate to what you are saying. Many people leave the Church because they have only encountered the sort of religious education that was provided to them as children. They learned their prayers and basic doctrines but were never challenged at the highest levels of Catholic theology and moral reasoning.

In the prologue to the Catechism of the Catholic Church there is this statement:

“Whoever teaches must become ‘all things to all men’ (I Cor 9:22), to win everyone to Christ. . . Above all, teachers must not imagine that a single kind of soul has been entrusted to them, and that consequently it is lawful to teach and form equally all the faithful in true piety with one and the same method! Let them realize that some are in Christ as newborn babes, others as adolescents, and still others as adults in full command of their powers… Those who are called to the ministry of preaching must suit their words to the maturity and understanding of their hearers, as they hand on the teaching of the mysteries of faith and the rules of moral conduct.”

It is a tough challenge for any Catechist. The key I think is to be wise enough to know your limitations and be ready to guide a soul to the right teacher if it is not you.
 
But you’re Catholic though.
Right, theres a point where men and women find peace with themselves also. I’d venture to say a good amount of souls out here today are running and from themselves. That restlessness is just an inability to be at peace with yourself thus God.

But this…

"In one category are “the things that can’t change but that we can do a better job explaining.” The other category, he said “are some things that aren’t difficult to fix.”

Is a pretty broad statement. When V-II comes up its been a half century since then. I believe there is a couple lost generations due to lack of proper teaching, hey the Sisters were gone by what 1970.

What ever happened in the 60’s is still reverberating around the USA. I’m not so sure the CC is much to blame. Hind sight is always perfect. I would say the issue with the priesthood became a need for males. What all others are immune to this, I think not. How quick we all point fingers.

I see people from that period returning to the church all the time. I just spoke to a lady who was raised Catholic, left for the world of insanity, took the evangelical route, and is back in the CC. Where are you gonna go confess your sins at the end of this road?

Not an easy call to be Catholic and live in this society today. Especially from the start at being use to the world as an adult.
 
My soon to be ex-wife was raised Baptist and at the time, I was a “Chris-ter” (only attending Mass Christmas & Easter), so we both agreed to go the non-demontial route and eventually drifted away all together. I went a couple of times with her and felt like a rock concert broke out. Couple of years ago, I made mention that I wouldn’t mind to start going to Mass again and her response was, “well you could go with me & son” and after that snide comment, I never raised the issue again.

Last August, about the time I could sense things were going south in the marriage, I heard God calling me Home.

Now that my wife has left me, i’m a practicing Catholic revert and love the beauty of a Catholic Mass and the Church has not changed much at all. Yes, the child abuse was a horrible, horrible, thing that I could never get my head around because I had such wonderful Priests when I was growing up.

There you go, that’s my story on why I left the Church and how I returned.

Oh and the though has never crossed my mind once so far this Lent to have meat on Friday 😃
 
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