Leaving out the handshake at the sign of peace?

[fedupbeliever]

Maybe they’re older, over 60. Older people often dislike the new ways. It seems silly to be shaking hands with strangers at every mass. I prefer to be in solitude at mass, for instance.

 

[mahrt]

In our diocese, the bishop instructed us not to shake hands during a season of the flu. Each person then came to the solution of simply making a bow to each other person. This has persisted, and one now sees less of the handshake than before. In my opinion the handshake is a thoroughly secular gesture; other ways of expressing a sacred greeting ought to be employed.

 

[Exorcist]

Maybe they’re older, over 60. Older people often dislike the new ways. It seems silly to be shaking hands with strangers at every mass. I prefer to be in solitude at mass, for instance.

The sign of peace is over 40 years old within the context of the OF Mass…

 

[Exorcist]

In our diocese, the bishop instructed us not to shake hands during a season of the flu. Each person then came to the solution of simply making a bow to each other person. This has persisted, and one now sees less of the handshake than before. In my opinion the handshake is a thoroughly secular gesture; other ways of expressing a sacred greeting ought to be employed.

 

[Allamanda]

In India, handshakes for the sign of peace are very rare (usually at youth masses). People usually join their hands and bow at (to?) the people around them.

However, I think it would be a shame to avoid the sign of peace completely. I know that it is INCREDIBLY difficult to give any sign of peace to someone when you’re angry/not in agreement with them. The sign of peace forces you to acknowledge that person and your own lack of love for that person.

“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.”

 

[Mike30]

Utterly amazing how many Theological experts, Liturgical Experts and experts in Canon Law have on this forum.

Simply amazing

 

[Exorcist]

Utterly amazing how many Theological experts, Liturgical Experts and experts in Canon Law have on this forum.

Simply amazing

It takes absolutely none of the above to realize that omitting the sign of peace is a loss. Invariably those celebrants/communities/parishes that chose to omit the sign of peace from the celebration of the OF Mass do so because they want to send a quiet message about what they perceive to be “orthodoxy.” I find it sad they would omit this wonderful element of the Mass for that reason.

 

[minkymurph]

It takes absolutely none of the above to realize that omitting the sign of peace is a loss. Invariably those celebrants/communities/parishes that chose to omit the sign of peace from the celebration of the OF Mass do so because they want to send a quiet message about what they perceive to be “orthodoxy.” I find it sad they would omit this wonderful element of the Mass for that reason.

I agree.

It would be a loss to omit it completely, and you don’t have to be an expert on anything to see that. In addition, are only ‘experts’ permitted to have or voice an opinion, and are the views of ‘experts’ the only one’s that matter?

What you have said is what I was eluding to in post about people being concerned about germs. That’s not the real reason want to omit the sign of peace. The real reason is because some people want to send a quiet message about what they perceive to be ‘orthodoxy.’ I say this because there are plenty of other circumstances in which they are willing to shake hands with strangers, and don’t seem to have the same concerns about catching germs in them.

 

[ProVobis]

People’s self-worth is predicated upon whether a complete stranger does or does not fulfill an optional custom, and are “devastated” by that?

I’m not “devastated” if that happens to me. I consider it instead my responsibility to extend the greeting (very often someone is uncomfortable or shy) in some way that does not discomfort the other person – such as later, or merely a smile, etc. And if a person bristles at that, that doesn’t “devastate” me either. That’s my opportunity to pray for his or her consolation.

Personally it doesn’t bother me. And apparently it doesn’t bother those who attend the EF either. We can joke with the priest or with one another in the vestibule or outside before and after Mass; that seems to be enough. It’s what you’re used to, I guess.

 

[lizaanne]

I’ve noticed so far in FL it is normal to have TWO “signs of peace”. Before Mass begins, a lector or cantor goes to the lectern and has everyone “stand and shake hands and greet those around you”. When we get to the actual sign of peace, we shake hands again with the same people. It’s awkward.

That would really cheese me off. I am there to worship and be with the Creator of the Universe. Not shake hands with people. If I wanted to do that, I would go to the coffee and donuts after Mass in the other building. Yes - we are a community of believers. But we can be every bit of that without having to touch each other and carry on during Mass.

At the moment in the NO Mass where the sign of peace occurs, Jesus Christ is physically sitting there on the altar. HE IS THERE. And what are folks doing? Walking around, turning their back on Him, paying attention to EVERYTHING ELSE around them. He is simply ignored for the length of time it takes for everyone to visit, hug, kiss, shake, pat, wink, nod, and whatever else they do. It’s ridiculous.

What is so horribly wrong about keeping our focus on Christ for the entire Mass? We have 167 hours in the week when we can shake hands with people. Can’t we, for one blessed hour, just focus on Christ? Is that really so difficult?



~Liza

 

[bilop]

As I said, it’s always a loss when it’s omitted. That doesn’t mean it’s wrong for the celebrant to do so, but it’s still a loss. That brief physical (or at least personal) acknowledgement and feedback that we stand on Calvary together as the Church is awesomely powerful. When it’s omitted, it’s a loss.

And, I’m saying you’re wrong in taking that absolute stance.

If the sign of peace degenerates into a loud, boisterous “meet-and-greet” with people leaving their pews, and continuing to talk and move during the Agnes Dei (all of which I have seen many times), it is a net gain to the Mass to omit it.

The priest needs to decide if the gain in collegiality is greater or less than the loss of solemnity. If it’s less, he should omit the sign.

In general, we should err in the direction of solemnity, b/c due worship and respect for God is more important than collegiality. You can always shake peoples’ hands after Mass.

God Bless

 

[Seeker1961]

That would really cheese me off. I am there to worship and be with the Creator of the Universe. Not shake hands with people. If I wanted to do that, I would go to the coffee and donuts after Mass in the other building. Yes - we are a community of believers. But we can be every bit of that without having to touch each other and carry on during Mass.

At the moment in the NO Mass where the sign of peace occurs, Jesus Christ is physically sitting there on the altar. HE IS THERE. And what are folks doing? Walking around, turning their back on Him, paying attention to EVERYTHING ELSE around them. He is simply ignored for the length of time it takes for everyone to visit, hug, kiss, shake, pat, wink, nod, and whatever else they do. It’s ridiculous.

What is so horribly wrong about keeping our focus on Christ for the entire Mass? We have 167 hours in the week when we can shake hands with people. Can’t we, for one blessed hour, just focus on Christ? Is that really so difficult?



~Liza

I’m not fond of it. My Dad said that Catholics were “trying too hard” to respond to criticism that the Church was unfriendly and didn’t care about the people or try to build community. I definitely see what he meant by that. Shaking hands and being friendly “on command” doesn’t build community.

 

[Sandalwood]

I’m not fond of it. My Dad said that Catholics were “trying too hard” to respond to criticism that the Church was unfriendly and didn’t care about the people or try to build community. I definitely see what he meant by that. Shaking hands and being friendly “on command” doesn’t build community.

I so agree. It’s very awkward and doesn’t lead to anything.

 

[minkymurph]

That would really cheese me off. I am there to worship and be with the Creator of the Universe. Not shake hands with people. If I wanted to do that, I would go to the coffee and donuts after Mass in the other building. Yes - we are a community of believers. But we can be every bit of that without having to touch each other and carry on during Mass.

At the moment in the NO Mass where the sign of peace occurs, Jesus Christ is physically sitting there on the altar. HE IS THERE. And what are folks doing? Walking around, turning their back on Him, paying attention to EVERYTHING ELSE around them. He is simply ignored for the length of time it takes for everyone to visit, hug, kiss, shake, pat, wink, nod, and whatever else they do. It’s ridiculous.

What is so horribly wrong about keeping our focus on Christ for the entire Mass? We have 167 hours in the week when we can shake hands with people. Can’t we, for one blessed hour, just focus on Christ? Is that really so difficult?



~Liza

Is that not what Exposition is for?

Mass is a communal experience, and I don’t think Jesus expects us to focus entirely on him with little or no acknowledgment of others, and I don’t imagine the sign of peace, if it is carried out in a dignified way, offends him. There also may be people at Mass who no one shakes hands with outside of it, and it gives them a sense of belonging and acceptance.

However, I take your point about being cheesed off when things go over the top.

 

[Seeker1961]

I so agree. It’s very awkward and doesn’t lead to anything.

It’s not like I’m going to say “wow, you have a great handshake! Let’s go out to dinner and be friends!”. The people who are the most enthusiastic about the whole thing seem to be those that were already connected before Mass-neighbors, family, work colleagues.

 

[Sandalwood]

It’s not like I’m going to say “wow, you have a great handshake! Let’s go out to dinner and be friends!”. The people who are the most enthusiastic about the whole thing seem to be those that were already connected before Mass-neighbors, family, work colleagues.

exactly!

 

[Mike30]

It takes absolutely none of the above to realize that omitting the sign of peace is a loss. Invariably those celebrants/communities/parishes that chose to omit the sign of peace from the celebration of the OF Mass do so because they want to send a quiet message about what they perceive to be “orthodoxy.” I find it sad they would omit this wonderful element of the Mass for that reason.

Really?

I make a general statement concerning the number of self proclaimed experts on this forum and you take it as an assault on the Sign of Peace itself. I never even mentioned the Sign of Peace one way or another.

 

[norvet]

According to the Vatican web site, under the general instructions of the Roman Missal, The Rite of Peace varies with the Local Bishops, however it states and I quote “it is appropriate that each person offer the Sign of Peace only to those who are nearest and in a sober manner.” I interpret this to mean a simple “Peace be with you” or “The Lord’s Peace be with you”. In my opinion, other than that simple statement in a reverent (sober) manner, all other actions such as kissing, hugging and handshaking in my opinion are not needed and inappropriate.

 

[R1ch4rd]

According to the Vatican web site, under the general instructions of the Roman Missal, The Rite of Peace varies with the Local Bishops, however it states and I quote “it is appropriate that each person offer the Sign of Peace only to those who are nearest and in a sober manner.” I interpret this to mean a simple “Peace be with you” or “The Lord’s Peace be with you”. In my opinion, other than that simple statement in a reverent (sober) manner, all other actions such as kissing, hugging and handshaking in my opinion are not needed and inappropriate.

I’m an usher and after offering to the nearest usher, we each go down five or six rows and offer to the people sitting near the end. Does this adhere to the above instruction? Just wondering.

 

[The_Curt_Jester]

However, I think it would be a shame to avoid the sign of peace completely. I know that it is INCREDIBLY difficult to give any sign of peace to someone when you’re angry/not in agreement with them. The sign of peace forces you to acknowledge that person and your own lack of love for that person.

I don’t know about that. I find it extraordinarily easy to look at someone I dislike, give a smile and shake his hand. Deception isn’t that hard, especially when you know it grates on the other person to act friendly.

However, easy as that may be, it’s extraordinarily hard to shake hands during Mass with a person with whom I’m on good terms because I just don’t believe in shaking hands during Mass. There are a thousand other times in the day to concentrate on neighbor. Mass isn’t a good time for it and it’s purely a distraction.