Life is too short. Post a Cartoon! (please)

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I start with 1-1/2 cups of 2% milk (full fat milk keeps yeast from rising so well). I warm that up to about 115 degrees. Then I add a tablespoon of yeast (dried nowadays, my Nana always used cake but it’s harder to find) and drizzle in some honey or turbinado sugar, not too much. Let it bubble a bit. Meanwhile bring 2 large eggs to room temperature, crack them in a separate bowl and stir a bit, add slowly to the milk and yeast. Then one cup of KA flour (regular. Sometimes I use all regular, sometimes I use 2 cups regular and the rest whole wheat) and about 1-1/2 to 2 teaspoons ground cardamom (grinding a whole pod use less, if you use preground use more), stir; add another cup flour. (Oh and use a wooden spoon. My Nana and aunt never used METAL spoons in baking!). Stir, then add in anywhere from 2-3 more cups flour (depending on how humid the day is, it seems; I keep begging for a baking scale so I could measure more precisely!) until the dough rolls away from the bowl and you can start kneading. Knead well. Grease the bowl, put the bread in, turn greased side up, cover, and let rise (1 to 1-1/2 hours or so). Punch bread down, place in two 8 x 4 greased pans, let rise 30-40 minutes. Place in COLD oven, turn oven to 400 degrees, bake 15 minutes. Then turn oven down to 350 and bake another 20-25 minutes.

Of course everybody has to tweak for their own oven (gas, electric, EZ bake LOL), and hot spots (I always have to keep my bread on the left side; the right back quarter bakes about 10 degrees hotter than the rest of the oven! And it’s electric. We moved to an apartment nearly 6 months ago and it took a while to get used to baking in an electric oven instead of my former gas oven that tended to bake ‘under’; this one bakes a bit ‘over’! I don’t care for Fleishmann yeast but it’s more available here than Red Star. But this is the bread my mom grew up on (she’s 90); the family ‘white bread’. My Nana grew up in Germany but on the border of Denmark which probably explains the use of cardamom! But it IS very good.
 
Well, if we’re going to turn this into a BREAD thread … Back when all three of my daughters lived in the same city as me (they’ve since moved) I made this abfab white sandwich bread which made enough that I could give them each half a loaf – frozen, because there’s no preservative. They would all roll their eyes and sigh and say, “Ok, Dad, I’ll take it because I love you and BTW when will you make it again?” (I also have an abfab multigrain bread which they all loved, which surprised everyone because their mom kinda burned them out on health by insisting on serving ONLY “whole wheat” bread. I’ll post that recipe here if I must.)

The only concession I make to fancy-dancy is I use this dough whisk I bought from King Arthur which has been SOOO nice in mixing any thick-type dough/batter and does a MUCH better job than any plain wooden spoon.

4 cups (1 lb, 4 oz / 566 grams) all-purpose flour
(I use whatever I bought on sale, usually the store-labeled brand)

1½ Tablespoons (17 grams) yeast
(I use Red Star Active yeast. I have no problem either proofing the yeast first, or mixing it in dry just before adding the warm milk and letting it rest/rise for a little extra time.)

2 Tablespoons granulated or brown sugar or honey

2 Tablespoons oil
(Use your favorite neutral oil, or melted butter. I do what my Mama taught me to do and use bacon fat. It’s what makes this taste so good.)

4 cups (2 pounds / 908 grams) warm WHOLE milk (or water), about 85° F
(Use 2% milk only if you forgot to buy whole milk before starting. NEVER use anything less than 2%, as the recipe needs the extra butterfat in the milk to get the proper consistency.)

Stir the flour, yeast, and sugar together in a bowl. Make a small well, add the oil and warm milk, and stir thoroughly and gently.

About 6 cups (1 lb, 13 oz / 825 grams) bread flour (or use more all-purpose flour)

1½ Tablespoons (22 grams) salt

When it’s all mixed together, start stirring vigorously while slowly adding one cup of the bread flour at a time and stirring it in, until you’ve added between 3 and 4 cups of flour and have a thick, shaggy dough. Cover the bowl with a damp tea towel or flour sack towel – nothing nubby – and let it rest at least 20 minutes, or up to 30 minutes if you didn’t proof the yeast ahead of time. This gives the yeast time to wake up and get happy.

(continued below)
 
Add the salt and another cup of bread flour and mix as best as you can. Add up to another cup of flour if the dough is still too sticky to knead. Turn the dough out onto a floured work surface and knead it with floured hands until the dough is soft and smooth, about 8 to 10 minutes. As you’re kneading, sprinkle a little more flour at a time as needed to keep it from sticking to your hands or the work surface. You want the dough to be as soft as possible without being sticky; you may not need the entire six cups of bread flour, or you may need a little extra.

Sprinkle flour in the dough bowl, place the dough in it, liberally dust it with flour, and cover it with a damp tea towel or flour sack towel. Set the dough somewhere that is preferably between 70°F and 75°F until it has doubled in size, about 60 to 75 minutes.

Turn the risen dough out onto a lightly floured work surface, flattening gently with your hands to break up any large air bubbles. Divide the dough into three equal pieces, and shape each piece into a loaf. I prefer the “envelope” or “log” method, explained here about halfway down the page. Place the dough into greased bread pans, sprinkle with flour, and cover the loaves with a damp tea towel or flour sack towel and let them rise until the dough springs back just a little when you gently poke it with a floured finger, about 40 to 60 minutes.

Bake in a pre-heated oven at 375F for 35 minutes or until golden brown. Remove from pans and let cool on a wire rack for at least 40 minutes before cutting. Let cool completely before bagging and freezing.

OK! Now you’ve all got something to do during Quarantine! Get to it!
 
Thanks! And of course, just about everything is better with bacon. I love bacon fat in my waffle batter-it’s the best! (Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)

Maybe you’d share the other recipe some day?
 
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Reminds me of when Venom first manifested himself in Eddy.
 
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Maybe if you tried keto…
 
The Vatican unveils it’s new social distancing Christening ritual. 😃

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