M
mhuff1
Guest
I really just want to vent. Here I am, working on myself as a person and have returned to my faith and am trying to surround myself with positive people…then today I get rediculed by a friend who I don’t talk much to anymore.
To give you the cliff notes version:
Had a set of four friends (two couples) that my ex and I hung out with 3-4 times a week. My ex and I began to have problems. Told said friends to thei faces that we won’t be coming out as much because we were trying to work on our relationship and find time for the two of us together, as well as time for ourselves.
A couple of the said friends apparently got upset because “I quit coming out all the time.” However, this was not brought to my attention (or to my face, for that matter) and instead decided to give me the cold shoulder. That being said, one of the other friends follow suite and also gave me the cold shoulder.
Needless to say I was very hurt by this. They were supposed to be my friends and I expected their support.
Then I began to realize that drama not only follows them, but they create it…especially by talking behind everybody’s backs. I found that I couldn’t trust not one person in the group. If I told one person something in confidence, no doubt the other three soon found out.
So I no longer go out of my way to contact them. If they contact me, I’ll respond a marjority of the time…but since I no longer trust them, I do not make a point to give them any information about me or what I’m doing in my life.
Since falling into a short spurt of depression after the break up, having breakdown, and loss of my dog, I’ve returned to my faith, made a few new friends, repaired an old much missed friendship, and have regained contact with other old friends.
Then, I received a text message from one of the said friends. (yes, that’s right…I said a TEXT MESSAGE. Not a phone call or a visit, but a TEXT MESSAGE!)
She proceeded to ask what she did to make me hate her.
Hate is such a strong word and I definitely don’t hate her. So I told her that I didn’t know what she was talking about.
She responded that I never respond to any of her texts when she invites me to do things and that rumor has it that I don’t trust her or any of the others in the “group” anymore and she was just wondering what she did to make me hate her.
I told her that I never said that I hated her and I wasn’t sure where she got that idea. She then said that I definitely ignore her.
And when I didn’t respond to that right away (because I was on a phone call then) she texted me saying “see you’re doing it right now. I never thought we stopped being friends but i guess you made that decision without me.”
Well of course, that upset me because she was one of the ones that gave me the cold shoulder and didn’t return my calls at the beginning.
She then pushed the issue by texting me again saying that when I was ready to tell her what she did to make me not want to talk to her or be friends anymore, let her know.
And remember…this is all being done by TEXT MESSAGING!
She then continues to push the issue texting me again saying that she and her husband text me all the time to invite me to things and I just ignore them.
So, trying to be civil, I responded telling her that I haven’t ignored every single text and right now I’m focusing on myself and things I’m doing in my life.
Apparently she didn’t like that answer because she then responded saying “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you could go downtown to clubs and party but couldn’t respond to my text inviting you to danny’s birthday party. I shouldn’t be so selfish. You could keep working on you.”
I have to admit, that really hurt. I was downtown supporting a friend that was dj’ing at a club I used to frequent. He just moved back to town and I had not seen him for a couple of years. This is a friend that I’ve known way before the “group,” give or take at least 7-8 years. He asked me to come to support him and I did.
And on top of that, I felt like she was trying to pick a fight with me. I hate to say, but it made me feel pretty ******…
But I didn’t even dignify that text with a response. I didn’t want to stoop to that level. I should have to explain myself to her. Friends don’t go around making friends feel guilty. Friends should actually be there for each other when they need (which they weren’t…when I needed them the most, they turned their backs on me.)
Just when I feel like I’m doing great…becoming a more faithful, positive person…surrounding myself with positive people…and this happens.
Did I do the right thing by not responding and delving further into whatever drama she was trying to cause??
I never once said that I hated any of them…and even though I no longer trust them, each one of them are still included in my daily prayers.
To give you the cliff notes version:
Had a set of four friends (two couples) that my ex and I hung out with 3-4 times a week. My ex and I began to have problems. Told said friends to thei faces that we won’t be coming out as much because we were trying to work on our relationship and find time for the two of us together, as well as time for ourselves.
A couple of the said friends apparently got upset because “I quit coming out all the time.” However, this was not brought to my attention (or to my face, for that matter) and instead decided to give me the cold shoulder. That being said, one of the other friends follow suite and also gave me the cold shoulder.
Needless to say I was very hurt by this. They were supposed to be my friends and I expected their support.
Then I began to realize that drama not only follows them, but they create it…especially by talking behind everybody’s backs. I found that I couldn’t trust not one person in the group. If I told one person something in confidence, no doubt the other three soon found out.
So I no longer go out of my way to contact them. If they contact me, I’ll respond a marjority of the time…but since I no longer trust them, I do not make a point to give them any information about me or what I’m doing in my life.
Since falling into a short spurt of depression after the break up, having breakdown, and loss of my dog, I’ve returned to my faith, made a few new friends, repaired an old much missed friendship, and have regained contact with other old friends.
Then, I received a text message from one of the said friends. (yes, that’s right…I said a TEXT MESSAGE. Not a phone call or a visit, but a TEXT MESSAGE!)
She proceeded to ask what she did to make me hate her.
Hate is such a strong word and I definitely don’t hate her. So I told her that I didn’t know what she was talking about.
She responded that I never respond to any of her texts when she invites me to do things and that rumor has it that I don’t trust her or any of the others in the “group” anymore and she was just wondering what she did to make me hate her.
I told her that I never said that I hated her and I wasn’t sure where she got that idea. She then said that I definitely ignore her.
And when I didn’t respond to that right away (because I was on a phone call then) she texted me saying “see you’re doing it right now. I never thought we stopped being friends but i guess you made that decision without me.”
Well of course, that upset me because she was one of the ones that gave me the cold shoulder and didn’t return my calls at the beginning.
She then pushed the issue by texting me again saying that when I was ready to tell her what she did to make me not want to talk to her or be friends anymore, let her know.
And remember…this is all being done by TEXT MESSAGING!
She then continues to push the issue texting me again saying that she and her husband text me all the time to invite me to things and I just ignore them.
So, trying to be civil, I responded telling her that I haven’t ignored every single text and right now I’m focusing on myself and things I’m doing in my life.
Apparently she didn’t like that answer because she then responded saying “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you could go downtown to clubs and party but couldn’t respond to my text inviting you to danny’s birthday party. I shouldn’t be so selfish. You could keep working on you.”
I have to admit, that really hurt. I was downtown supporting a friend that was dj’ing at a club I used to frequent. He just moved back to town and I had not seen him for a couple of years. This is a friend that I’ve known way before the “group,” give or take at least 7-8 years. He asked me to come to support him and I did.
And on top of that, I felt like she was trying to pick a fight with me. I hate to say, but it made me feel pretty ******…
But I didn’t even dignify that text with a response. I didn’t want to stoop to that level. I should have to explain myself to her. Friends don’t go around making friends feel guilty. Friends should actually be there for each other when they need (which they weren’t…when I needed them the most, they turned their backs on me.)
Just when I feel like I’m doing great…becoming a more faithful, positive person…surrounding myself with positive people…and this happens.
Did I do the right thing by not responding and delving further into whatever drama she was trying to cause??
I never once said that I hated any of them…and even though I no longer trust them, each one of them are still included in my daily prayers.